unfortunate bit bagman was now conveyed to the guard-house, and from
thence, after he had somewhat recovered, to prison, under the same
suspicion which had procured him such rough treatment from the mob. So
that, to appearance, as they werena very nice in thae times, he was
saved frae a violent death only to be subjected to anither; frae bein
kicked into the ither warld to be hanged; and o' this opinion the wee
bagman was himsel for some time, for the authorities o' Carlisle war at
that period excessively loyal, and wadna cared muckle to hae hanged him
on chance. As it was, however, he was kept in jail for a week, when his
innocence havin been so clearly established that the most loyal o' his
judges couldna deny it, he was set at liberty--though wi' a grudge, for
they wad still fain hae hanged him--and a caution never to wear a blue
bonnet in Carlisle again.
"The wee bagman," added the landlord, "has never come this way since,
and I fancy now never will. Come, freends," continued he, "shute in
your glasses--the drink's gettin cauld; and," he said, edging the mouth
of the bowl slopingly towards him, so as to afford him a view of its
contents, "there's a gey drap in't yet." Then, with that forethought
which was a very remarkable and praiseworthy trait in his
character--"Betty," he cried out to a servant girl, "keep the kettle
boilin."
His call for the glasses of his friends being promptly obeyed, they were
as promptly re-filled, and it is but doing justice to the honest men
assembled on this occasion to state, were as speedily emptied again.
This done--
"Mr Gas," said Walter Gibson, one of the most extensive traders and most
respectable men in the company--"Mr Gas," he said--for they all
addressed him as their chairman--"these are a' queer aneugh stories in
their way that hae been tell't the nicht; but I'm no sure if there's ony
o' them better than the story o' Sandy M'Gill and his mither."
The landlord cocked his ears. "And what story's that, Watty?" he said.
"I never heard it."
"It's no the waur o' that, however," said Watty, dryly.
"No a grain," replied the other, with one of his good-natured laughs;
"but let us judge for oursels."
"I'll do that," quoth Walter; and he immediately began:--"Twa or three
years ago, as ye a' ken, Lord Drumlanrig, son o' the Duke o'
Queensberry, raised a regiment for what was ca'ed the Holland service.
His lordship's headquarters durin the recruitin for the corps was
Dumfries, where he used to beat up on the market days. Amongst those who
were enlisted on ane o' thae occasions was a young lad o' the name o'
Sandy M'Gill--a joiner to trade. Sandy was a handsome, good-lookin young
man--very smart and clever, and possessed o' a good education; that is,
he wrote and figured weel.
On the regiment being completed, it was embodied at Dunse, and then
drilled for some time. It was then marched to Leith, Sandy M'Gill and
a', where it was to be embarked for Amsterdam. Two days after the
regiment had left Dunse, Lord Drumlanrig, mounted on horseback, and
attended by a servant, also mounted, set out from Dumfries, to join his
regiment at Leith, whence he meant to sail wi' it for Holland. On
approachin the Nether Mill, his lordship was recognised, while yet at
some distance, by an auld blacksmith o' the name o' William Thamson.
"There," said he to a bit lively, hardy-lookin auld wifie--it was Widow
M'Gill--"there's Lord Drumlanrig comin forrit."
"Is that him?" quoth the auld wife; "feth and I maun speak to him then!
He's taen awa my puir Sandy for a sodger."
And she ran into the middle o' the road, and, ere Lord Drumlanrig was
aware, she had his horse by the bridle, exclaimin--
"Please yer lordship, ye maun stop and speak to me a wee. I hae
something to say to ye."
"What is it, my good woman?" said his lordship, smilin good-naturedly;
"but I'm in a great hurry, and you must not detain me a moment."
"What I want to speak to yer lordship aboot," replied Widow M'Gill,
taking nae notice o' his lordship's impatience, "is this: ye hae taen
awa my puir son, Sandy, for a sodger, and I'm like to brak my heart
aboot him."
"There's nae guid reason for that in the world, my honest woman," said
his lordship; "as he'll be better wi' me than lyin at hame here, scartin
the porridge pots."
"I'm no sure o' that, my lord, unless ye look weel to him, and tak him
under yer special care. Ye'll fin' him weel wordy o't; for, although I
say it that sudna say it, he's a clever, weel-inclined lad."
"I've nae doot o't, honest woman, nae doot o't," said his lordship, now
endeavourin to move on; "and, you may depend on't, I'll see that he gets
every justice." And he made another attempt to get on.
"Na, na, my lord," said the widow, perceivin his efforts to get quit o'
her, "I winna let ye gang that way--I hae something mair to say to ye
yet; but, as I see a' the neebors glowrin at us, ye'll just come doon
and step into the house wi' me a minute, and I'll tell ye there a' I hae
to say."
"Really, really, my good woman," said his lordship, in great alarm at
this threat o' further detention, "it is impossible--I cannot on any
account--I am indeed in a great hurry, and exceedinly anxious to get
forrit."
"Deil may care, my lord!--the deil a fit ye'll stir till ye come in wi'
me a bit--on that I'm determined." And she took a still firmer haud o'
the bridle.
"Some ither time, my guid woman," said his lordship, despairinly.
"Na, na, nae time like the present, my lord," replied the widow.
Seein now that, unless he had recourse to some violence--which it was
neither his nature nor desire to hae--it was useless to contend wi' the
resolute auld wife, his lordship dismounted, though, ye may believe, wi'
a very bad grace, gave his horse to his servant to haud, and went in wi'
Widow M'Gill to her little cot. On enterin the hoose, his lordship made
anither desperate effort to prevail on the widow to shorten his
detention.
"Now, my guid woman," he said, "let me beg o' you to say quickly what ye
hae to say, for I really will not be detained."
"No twa minutes, no twa minutes, my lord," said the widow, dustin, wi'
great activity, wi' her apron, a chair for his lordship to sit doun
upon.
"No, no; I really will not sit doun," said his lordship, determinedly.
"I'll hear what you hae to say standin."
"But ye _maun_ sit, my lord," replied the widow, wi' equal resolution.
"A bonny thing it wad be, you to come into my house, and gang oot again
withoot sittin doun. Na, na, that maunna be said. Doun, my lord, ye maun
sit." And, seein that he wad only increase his ain delay by resistance,
doun, to be sure, his lordship did sit. "Noo, my lord," says the widow,
"I'm sure the deil a morsel o' breakfast ye hae gotten the day yet--for
it's no aboon seven o'clock; sae ye'll just tak a mouthfu wi' me."
At this horrid proposal, his lordship sprang frae his chair--for he was
noo fairly driven at bay--and made for the door; but the widow was as
clever in the heels as he was. She sprang after him, and, before he
could gain the door, had him fast by the tails o' the coat, exclaimin,
as she pu'ed him back--
"Deil a fit o' ye, my lord, 's gaun oot o' this house, till ye taste my
bread and cheese. Ise haud ye fast, I warrant."
Regardless o' her threats, his lordship still pressed for the door; but
the stieve auld wife held on wi' a determined and nae feckless grip, and
he couldna mak it oot, withoot efforts that micht do her an injury.
Seein this, and seein, at the same time, the ludicrousness o' the
struggle, his lordship at length gied in, and returned to his seat. In a
twinklin the active auld wifie had a table before him, covered wi'
bread, butter, and cheese, and a large jug o' sweet milk.
"Noo, my lord, see and tak a mouthfu. It's but hamely fare to put before
a lord; but it's gien wi' hearty guid-will, and that maun mak amends."
His lordship guid-naturedly took a little o' what was put before him.
While doin this, the auld wifie kept up a runnin fire o' sma'-talk.
"Noo, my lord, ye'll be guid to my son. He's an honest man's bairn, but
his faither's dead and gane mony a year syne; and mony a lonely seat
and sair heart has fa'en to my share sin syne; but I aye looked forward
to findin a comforter and supporter in my only son, in my auld age; but
noo he's taen frae me too, and a' is desolation and darkness around me."
Here the puir widow, whose maternal feelins, thus excited by the picture
she had drawn o' her ain loneliness, had suddenly and totally changed
her character, or rather had brocht oot its real qualities, which were,
after a', those o' a kind and feelin heart, raised the corner o' her
apron to her eyes, and wiped awa an involuntary tear. His lordship,
notwithstandin o' the provokin predicament in which he was, feelin much
affected by the widow's lamentations, thus simply expressed, took oot a
memorandum-book frae his pocket, and havin inquired her son's name, and
the name o' the place o' her residence, wrote them doun. He next asked
if she knew in whose company he was.
"Captain Dooglas," replied the widow--"Captain Dooglas they ca' him."
Then, becomin querist in turn--"Do ye ken what sort o' a man he is, my
lord?"
"Oh, an excellent man, my guid woman," said his lordship. "Your son
could not be under a better fellow." And his lordship noted doun this
circumstance also, wi' the name o' Sandy's captain.
Havin dune this, he replaced his memorandum-book in his pocket, and rose
frae his seat, the widow noo offerin nae farther resistance; and havin
placed, unperceived, as he thought, a couple o' guineas on the table,
was aboot to leave the house, after shakin his hostess kindly by the
hand--for his lordship was noo rather tickled wi' the adventure
athegither--and promisin to see to the interests o' her son, when the
widow, gettin her ee on the coin, snatched it up, and was forcin it back
on its original possessor, exclaimin--
"Na, na, my lord--I'll tak nae siller for kindness. A' that I want is,
that ye wad be guid to my puir Sandy, whan he's far awa frae his hame
and his freends. Be kind till him, my lord, and tak the widow's blessin
in return." And she was pressin the money back on his lordship, when he
ran frae her, got oot o' the hoose, and was aboot to mount his horse,
when, to his unutterable horror, he heard the widow exclaimin, "Gude
guide me! I hae a' this time forgotten your servant, my lord; and he'll
be hungry aneugh, too, puir fallow, I hae nae doot." And she ran and
seized _his_ horse next by the bridle. "Come doun, lad, and come in by a
bit, and tak a mouthfu. His lordship, I'm sure, 'll wait twa or three
minutes on ye without grudgin't; for the puir maun be fed as weel as the
rich, the man as weel as his maister."
"No, no, no. For God's sake, my guid woman, let us be gone!" exclaimed
his lordship, in an implorin voice, and now beginnin to think he wad
never get oot o' the auld wife's hands.
"Na, troth, my lord, I'll no let him go. The lad _maun_ hae a mouthfu o'
meat."
"Then, in Heaven's name," said his lordship, "if ye will hae him tak
something, bring't oot till him here, and dinna tak him aff his horse."
Complyin wi' this request, the very first she had complied wi', the auld
wifie ran in to the house--his lordship, while she was there, tellin his
servant to put at ance into his pocket whatever it micht be--and brought
oot a quantity o' bread and cheese, which the man disposed o' as his
maister had desired him.
The coast being now clear, his lordship, after again shakin hands wi'
the auld wife, and promisin to keep an ee on her son, put spurs to his
horse, and darted aff at full speed, as delighted wi' his liberty as if
he had escaped frae a highwayman; but, fast as he gaed, it was some
seconds before he got oot o' hearin o' the auld wife's voice, bawlin
after him, "Now, my lord, dinna forget Sandy--dinna forget Sandy
M'Gill."
On gainin some distance, both master and man drew bridle, and laughed
heartily at the adventure wi' the auld wife o' the Nether Mill.
Aweel, shortly after, his lordship embarked for Holland with a part o'
his regiment--the remainder, amongst which was Sandy M'Gill, proceeding
in another vessel--and arrived there, as did the whole corps, in due
time, and without any accident.
Some days after the landin, Lord Drumlanrig, at parade one forenoon,
after speakin and laughin for a few minutes wi' Captain Douglas in front
o' the line, went up to a certain guid-lookin young sodger in that
officer's company, and callin him out frae his comrades, asked him his
name.
"Sandy M'Gill, my lord," replied the young man, touchin his hat, and
somewhat surprised at bein singled out in this way.
"Exactly," said his lordship. "Well, Sandy, I breakfasted in your
mother's house on my way frae Dumfries to Edinburgh, just before I left
Scotland; and a kind, hearty old woman she is, I assure you."
"I wonder, my lord," said Sandy, blushin, "that my mother could hae had
the impudence to tak your lordship into her puir sooty house."
"It was no impudence at all, Sandy--nae such thing. It was oot o'
kindness to me and affection for you. The breakfast, however, was an
excellent one, and gien wi' a hearty welcome and richt guid-will. But I
promised yer mother, Sandy," continued his lordship, "to look after ye,
and I mean to do sae. Can you write any?"
Sandy said he could.
"Can you figure?"
Another reply in the affirmative.
"Can ye show me your handwriting? Have ye any specimens upon you?"
Sandy pulled out of his pocket some scraps o paper that exhibited his
fist. His lordship looked at them, and said the writing was very
guid--that it wad do very weel. "Now, then, Sandy," he added, "I'll tell
ye what I mean to do for you, to begin wi': there's anither serjeant
wanted for your company, and I hae desired Captain Douglas to appoint
you. You will get a suit o' claes frae the store, and there's five
guineas to you to purchase necessaries, and I hae nae doot ye'll turn
oot a guid and brave sodger."
Sandy endeavoured to express his gratitude for the sudden and unexpected
fortune; but he couldna. Nor, though he had been able, did his lordship
gie him an opportunity; for, anticipatin the lad's embarrassment, he
walked awa the moment he had dune speakin.
Next day, Sandy appeared in the uniform o' a non-commissioned officer;
and, being now on the road to promotion, returned, at the conclusion o'
the war, to his native place, as captain; attributin a' his guid fortune
to the breakfast which his mother gae to Lord Drumlanrig at the Nether
Mill.
"Aweel, it is really curious how things turn oot sometimes," said lang
Jamie Turner, on the conclusion o' the foregoing story--"very curious.
Did ye ever hear, Mr Gas," continued Jamie, now addressing his landlord,
"hoo Jock Tinwald, a son o' Andrew Tinwald's o' Shaw Hill, recovered
forty guineas he ance lost at the Candlemas Fair o' Dumfries?"
"No," said Mr Gas, looking with interest at the speaker. "I never heard
that ane."
"It was a gey clever ane," said Jamie Turner, and, without further
preface, he proceeded to relate the following adventure:--
On a certain Candlemas Fair, some twa or three years back, auld Tinwald
o' Shaw Hill sent his son Jock to Dumfries, wi' forty guineas in a net
purse in his pocket, to purchase a couple o' good draught horses. Jock
wasna lang in the fair until he fell in wi' twa horses that appeared to
be o' precisely the description he wanted. He inquired their price,
found it wasna far beyond the mark, and, finally, after some chaffering,
struck a bargain with the seller. This done, the young farmer put his
hand into his pocket, to bring out the net purse with the forty guineas.
He started, and looked pale. It was not in the pocket in which he
thought--nay, in which he was certain he had put it. He searched
anither, and anither, and anither, with distraction in his looks. It was
in nane o' them--it was lost, gane! He had been robbed. O' this there
was nae doubt. Poor Jock was in despair, but it was an evil without a
remedy; for he had not the smallest notion when, where, or by whom he
had been plundered. There was therefore no help for it; and, feelin
this, Jock repaired to a public-house, drowned the recollection of his
loss in brandy, and went home at nicht penniless, horseless, and drunk.
Six months after this, the Rude Fair of Dumfries came round; and, in the
thick and the thrang o' this fair, micht hae been seen the braid
shouthers and the round, healthfu, guid-natured face o' Jock Tinwald.
But surely he'll tak care this time how he mingles wi' the crood, or at
least keep a sharp ee on his neebors. Not he. There he is, pushin and
jostlin awa in the heart o' the very densest mass, wi' an apparent
regardlessness o' consequences which is most amazin, considerin the loss
he sustained on a former occasion. Nay, not only is he doin this, but he
is ostentatiously displayin a purse apparently as well filled as the
last one. This does indeed seem the extreme o' folly. But it only
_seems_ so. It is not without a reason. Jock is not so unguarded as he
appears. The truth is, he is just now practisin a ruse which he is not
without hope may help him to the recovery o' his forty guineas.
The purse which Jock is so openly sportin is filled not with gold, but
with copper. It contains, in short, instead o' guineas, a quantity of
farthings, and is thus ostentatiously displayed in the hope of
attractin the notice of the light-fingered gentleman who had relieved
him on the former occasion--and with what promise o' success may be
guessed frae the followin incident.
On Tinwald's first entering the scene o' the fair, he was marked by two
persons o' very equivocal appearance who were hoverin about.
"That," said ane o' them, nudging his neebor wi' his elbow, and inclinin
his head towards Tinwald--"that's the flat I _did_ at the last Candlemas
fair. The easiest handled guse I ever cam across."
"What wad ye think o' our tryin him again?" said the speaker's neebor.
"Wi' a' my heart," replied the other. "He's but a saft ane; but I fear
he'll no hae onything on him this time."
At this instant the fears of the pair of pickpockets on this score were
relieved by a sight of Jock's purse. It caught their eyes in a moment,
and they viewed it with a delight which gentlemen of their profession
alone can know. They felt as sure of it as if it were already in their
pockets. Dropping all other speculation, therefore, they now commenced
dogging Jock, who was fishing away with his purse through the crowd,
like an angler with his fly, for the thief of his guineas or some of his
gang, whom he had a pretty shrewd notion would not be far off. Jock,
however, took care to keep the exhibition of his purse within bounds. He
took care not to make an over frequent or suspicious display of it, only
occasionally, and then returning it to a certain side pocket of easy
access. There was nothing, therefore, which Tinwald was at this moment
so anxious for as to feel a hand in the said pocket; and this was a
gratification which he was not long denied. A hand was introduced, he
felt it, and, turning quickly round, he seized the person to whom it
belonged.
"I ken ye, freend," said Jock to his prisoner, in a low whisper--"I ken
ye perfectly weel. It was you that robbed me o' forty guineas in a green
net purse at the last Candlemas Fair." (All this was said by Jock at a
venture, but by chance was true.) "Now, I say, let me hae the money back
quietly, and I'll tak nae mair notice o' the matter; but, if ye dinna,
I'll immediately gie the alarm, and hae ye apprehended. Sae tak yer
choice, freend. But, mind, there's a rope round your neck: it's hangin
at the very least."
"Let me go, then, and follow me," replied the depredator, briefly, and
in the same low tone that he had been addressed. Jock loosed his grasp,
and keepin close behind his man, who immediately began threadin his way
oot o' the crowd, followed him till they had cleared it; when, dreadin a
sudden bolt, he cam up close beside him; and thus the two held on their
way, till they cam to a retired part o' the market-place, when the thief
suddenly stopped, and, plungin his hand into his bosom, drew oot a
leathern bag, from which he counted into the astonished young farmer's
hand forty golden guineas. Jock, confounded at his own success, could
scarcely believe his eyes when he looked at the precious deposit in his
hand; and, in the fulness o' his joy, insisted on giein the thief
half-a-mutchkin o' brandy on the head o't. This, however, the latter
declined, and, in an instant after, disappeared in the crowd; and Jock
never saw mair o' him. And sae ends my story, freends," added lang Jamie
Turner.
"And, by my feth, a richt guid ane--a real clever ane," said the
landlord, as he filled glasses round, and, rising on his little, short
legs, drank to each and all of the company "a soun sleep and a blithe
waukenin." In two or three minutes more, the kitchen of the Floshend Inn
was cleared of its tenants, and for that night, at any rate, no more was
heard in it the sounds of revelry, nor the accompanying glee of the
gibe, or jest, or merry tale.
LOTTERY HALL.
I had slept on the preceding night at Brampton; and, without entering so
far into particulars as to say whether I took the road towards Carlisle,
Newcastle, Annan, or to the south, suffice it to say, that, towards
evening, and just as I was again beginning to think of a resting-place,
I overtook a man sauntering along the road, with his hands behind his
back. A single glance informed me that he was not one who earned his
bread by the sweat of his brow; but the same glance also told me that he
had not bread enough and to spare. His back was covered with a well-worn
black coat, the fashion of which belonged to a period at least twelve
years preceding the time of which I write. The other parts of his
outward man harmonised with his coat as far as apparent age and colour
went. His head was covered with a low-crowned, broad-brimmed hat; and on
his nose he wore a pair of silver-mounted spectacles. To my mind he
presented the picture of a poor scholar, or of gentility in ruins. The
lapels of his coat were tinged a little, but only a little, with snuff;
which _Flee-up_, or _Beggar's Brown_, as some call it, is very apt to
do. In his hands, also, which, as I have said, were behind his back, he
held his snuff-box. It is probable that he imagined he had returned it
to his pocket after taking a pinch; but he appeared from his very
saunter to be a meditative man, and an idea having shot across his brain
while in the act of snuff-taking, the box was unconsciously retained in
his hand, and placed behind his back. Whether the hands are in the way
of contemplation or not, I cannot tell, for I never think, save when my
hand holds a pen; yet I have observed that to carry the hands behind
the back is a favourite position with _walking thinkers_. I accordingly
set down the gentleman with the broad-brimmed hat and silver-mounted
spectacles to be a walking thinker; and it is more than probable that I
should not have broken in upon his musings (for I am not in the habit of
speaking to strangers), had it not been that I observed the snuff-box in
his hands, and that mine required replenishing at the time. It is
amazing and humiliating to think how uncomfortable, fretful, and
miserable the want of a pinch of snuff can make a man!--how dust longs
for dust! I had been desiring a pinch for an hour, and here it was
presented before me like an unexpected spring in the wilderness.
Snuffers are like freemasons--there is a sort of brotherhood among them.
The real snuffer will not give a pinch to the mere dipper into other
people's boxes, but he will never refuse one to the initiated. Now, I
took the measure of the man's mind at a single glance. I discovered
something of the pedant in his very stride--it was thoughtful, measured,
mathematical; to say nothing of the spectacles, or of his beard, which
was of a dark colour, and which had not been visited by the razor for at
least two days. I therefore accosted him in the hackneyed but pompous
language attributed to Johnson--
"Sir," said I, "permit me to immerge the summits of my digits in your
pulveriferous utensil, in order to excite a grateful titillation in my
olfactory nerves."
"Cheerfully, sir," returned he, handing me the box, for which, by the
way, he first groped in his waistcoat-pocket; "I know what pleasure it
is--'_naribus aliquid haurire_.'"