Out of Sectarian Confusion
I was still a Methodist. The Methodist did not license women to preach; but
when the preachers found out that God was using me in the salvation of
souls and that I was not especially interested in building up any certain
denomination, I had an abundance of calls.
God had already begun talking to my brother Jeremiah about the sin of
division, and he was beginning to see the evils of sectarianism. The winter
after I was healed, he had attended the Jacksonville, Illinois, holiness
convention, and had met there Bro. D. S. Warner, who at that time was
editor of a holiness paper, _The Herald of Gospel Freedom_, then
published at Rome City, Ind. Brother Warner was already beginning to
discern the unity of God's people, but he had not yet received enough light
on the subject to sever his connection with the Winebrennerian
denomination, of which he was a member. It was about the time of the
Jacksonville meeting that _The Herald of Gospel Freedom_ was
consolidated with _The Pilgrim_, a small holiness paper published at
Indianapolis, Indiana.
While at the Jacksonville meeting, Jeremiah subscribed for _The
Pilgrim_ and had it sent to me at Windsor, Missouri, as I had not yet
begun gospel work.
I received only a few numbers of _The Pilgrim_, as that publication
was consolidated with _The Herald of Gospel Freedom_ January 1, 1881,
under the name _The Gospel Trumpet_. At a later date, when Brother
Warner had full light on the church, _The Gospel Trumpet_ was no
longer considered a consolidation of the two papers, but an entirely new
publication. The first issue of _The Trumpet_ (January 1, 1881)
represented a new paper and was later designated as Vol. 1, No. 1. When the
publication of _The Pilgrim_ ceased, Brother Warner began to send me
_The Gospel Trumpet_ to finish out the unexpired time of my
subscription to _The Pilgrim_.
During my brother's absence in evangelistic work I received several copies
of _The Trumpet_. As soon as I read in _The Trumpet_ about the
sin of division and saw that the new paper opposed the licensing of
preachers, my sectarian spirit was stirred. I thought that holiness would
make the churches, as I called them, better. I was afraid that if people
got hold of such literature as _The Trumpet_ it would disgust them
with holiness forever. I burned _The Trumpets_ I had already received,
and then sat down and wrote Brother Warner never to send me another copy.
As I was traditionized, and had opposed the truth in ignorance, the Lord
did not hold my opposition as a wilful sin.
After my brother had got light on the one body, he was so enthused with the
truth that he wanted to explain it to every one he met. While out walking
one day the next summer after he discerned the one body, he fell into
conversation with a man about the Scriptures. After talking a little while
the man said, "I have a paper that reads just as you talk." Going to the
house, he brought out _The Gospel Trumpet_ and gave it to my brother,
who went down the road reading as he went. He never stopped reading until
he had finished the paper. At the earliest opportunity my brother wrote a
letter to Brother Warner, asking him if he had enough light on the one body
to set it clearly before the people. He also asked him if many were
accepting this divine truth. To the first question Brother Warner replied,
"Yes," and to the second, "Yes, hundreds are discerning the one body." As
soon as my brother learned that Brother Warner and many others had the same
truth that God had made so clear and beautiful to him, he rejoiced greatly.
He could not rest until he went where Brother Warner was; but, as I had
neglected to walk in the light, I was left alone, and that, too, in more
ways than one.
Some time before I discerned the body of Christ, I had some impressive
dreams. In one I thought I was in a large building belonging to some
denomination. A conference of that denomination was being held just outside
the door, and the ministers wanted me to come and take part. I looked
toward the door through which I must pass, and I saw two large worms with
their heads together, lying directly across the threshold. In order to
enter the room, I would have to step over the worms and would be in great
danger of receiving a deadly bite. I said to myself, "I will not run the
risk for any man's notions or ways"; and, turning on my heel, I went out of
another door.
I soon saw my dream fulfilled. The denomination that I had been holding a
meeting for insisted that I should join their conference, saying that they
would give me a license so that I could hold meetings in their territory. I
knew that, according to their discipline, they could not license a woman to
preach; and I said to the minister, "You don't dare to give me a license."
"Well," said he, "I will tell you what you can do, Sister Cole; we can go
to a place not far from here where you have had a good meeting, lay this
matter before the people, and have them vote to give you a permit, so that
you can hold meetings in any part of our district." I did not feel at all
led to take such steps; and, as I had done in my dream, I turned in the
other direction. I suppose God was using this method to get me ready for
the truth.
The summer before I got out of sectarianism, an M. E. South minister
invited me to come to their new chapel, to attend the quarterly conference,
and to help hold a series of meetings. As the M. E. South denomination did
not license women preachers, women were not allowed at the quarterly
conference. They had arranged, however, that several other women and I
should sit in a room adjoining the conference, so that we could hear the
proceedings. This was on Saturday. On Sunday morning they held their
quarterly love-feast, partook of the Lord's Supper, and listened to a
sermon by the presiding elder.
In the afternoon and the evening, I preached. While the afternoon service
was in progress, the ministers were holding a private meeting to decide
whether or not I should proceed with the meeting I had come to hold. In
this part of the country was a wealthy man, a sinner, who contributed very
liberally to the support of the work. This man objected to women's
preaching and opposed the continuance of the meeting.
It was decided that the meeting should not continue, but the pastor of the
congregation did not tell me. The pastor and his wife were both present at
the service on Monday night, and both seemed well pleased. On Tuesday
evening the interest began to increase, and one or two raised their hands
for prayer. Just at the close of the service a note was handed me
requesting me to close the meeting, as they had decided not to continue at
the present time, but to wait until later in the season.
I could not keep from crying. I had called the Methodist Church my mother;
and now to think that my mother was treating me in this way, made me feel
very bad. I went home with a young couple who had been saved a short time
before in a meeting held near this place. They felt very bad over what had
happened, and we all cried together. The young people tried to encourage me
as best they could.
Next day they took me to their aunt's, a special friend of mine, who had
shown me kindness while I was in that neighborhood before. As we went along
the road, I thought to myself, "Any one treated as I have been ought to
look sneaking"; and I tried to think of everything I could to make me look
that way. When we arrived at our destination, the sister was not in the
room, so I hunted the smallest chair I could find, and sat down. As soon as
she came in, she saw that I was in trouble and inquired what was the
matter. I began to tell her, crying at the same time; but she began to
laugh. Well, she laughed and I cried; but after a while I took to laughing
too. I never again felt bad about my treatment at that place.
I still continued to get calls from the sectarian preachers to go and help
hold meetings. I responded to these, and held two or three meetings in
different places. Late that fall I held a meeting at Rolla, Mo. The
preacher could hardly get an audience when he preached, so he sent for me,
thinking that a woman preacher would be quite an attraction and would draw
crowds. The crowds came. Although there were a number of ministers present,
including the presiding elder, I occupied the pulpit, I think, during half
of that meeting. Conviction came upon the people, and a number came to the
altar; but not many of those who came, seemed to get an experience.
On the last night of the meeting quite a number of bright, intelligent
young people, some of them college students came to the altar and some of
them were getting saved. As the minister went to talk with the seekers one
by one, God put it into my heart to listen to what they were saying. Not
once did these preachers say, "Seek the Lord until you find him;" "There is
reality in salvation;" "Never stop until you know you are saved." Their
instructions were: "Join the church;" "Get baptized," etc. God opened my
eyes right there to the awful work that these so-called ministers were
doing. I said, "If they are going to help deceive souls that way and send
them to destruction, I will never help them again." That was the last
meeting in which I ever helped to build up Babylon.
Collections were taken up for the ministers and for the general expenses of
the meeting, but no one ever said to me, "Do you need any means?" One of
the sisters, however, found out that I had a little money, and she asked me
to give it to her to use in buying a little clothing for me so I would be
suitably dressed to preach in their meeting. I felt that even this was too
good for me, because I had failed to walk in the light.
At the close of the meeting, to my surprise, I found myself under a wrong
spirit. I went to Bro. John P. Bailey and wife, who had accepted the truth
when Jeremiah preached his first sermon on the church at that place. I told
Brother and Sister Bailey my condition as best I could, and the three of us
fasted and prayed three days. God delivered me from the false spirit, gave
me light on the one body, the church, and made me glad to walk in the light
as fast as it was revealed.
Bro. Jake Cruts came to ask my advice on the subject of baptism. "Sister
Cole," said he, "what do you think about baptism: is it a commandment of
God? If so, what is the correct mode?" Before I could answer him, he
continued, "I suppose we shall never know the right mode." "I believe,"
said I, "if we are sincere and come to God in earnest prayer, he will show
us his will, even if the scripture on that doctrine has been wrongly
translated." The brother agreed with me, and I said, "Let us get down and
pray." While we were on our knees, God made me to understand that in the
near future, he would make known to me his will on the subject of baptism.
I told the brother who was kneeling with me what God had shown me; but it
seemed that I needed to be humbled still more. At this time I received
another _Trumpet_ in which there was an article by D. S. Warner on the
subject of baptism. I said to myself, "He is nothing but a Baptist preacher
anyway," and found myself going into gross darkness. For about two hours it
seemed that I was bound for hell. I cried out, "O Lord! why is it that
after you have used me in the salvation of souls, some of whom no doubt are
in the glory-world, I must now be lost?" The Lord made me understand that I
was not responsible for not having been baptized, as I had no knowledge of
the teaching of the Scriptures on this subject, but that I was responsible
for my present light. He showed me that, if I would walk in the light, I
should not be lost. I decided then and there to walk in every ray of light
that God gave me.
As members of the M. E. Church, my parents had had me sprinkled when I was
a child, and up to this time I had had no light on baptism. When I had
opportunity and I was buried in baptism, God wonderfully witnessed that I
was being baptized in his order.
My first text after I got light on the one body of Christ, was Jeremiah
1:6-10 and 17-19. A short time before this I had held a meeting with an M.
E. South preacher, who now seemed to stand before me like an obstructing
mountain. As I began my sermon, I seemed to see him in that capacity.
Before I was through delivering the message, however, God had lifted me
above the mountain, so that I was never again troubled in that way.
My name was still on the M. E. class-book; but God showed me that I ought
to have it removed, and how to have it removed. I sent for my church letter
and trusted the Lord to direct me how to dispose of it. One Sunday after a
sermon had been delivered on the church of God, I rose and told the
congregation about the church letter, told them that the Lord had shown me
that I could not have two valid contracts for my entire service with two
different parties at the same time. I said, "I have decided that the
contract between God and my soul is the more important one." Then I
proceeded to tear up my letter, and God sent his mighty power, witnessing
that my contract with the Lord was ratified in heaven. So much of heaven
came down, and the glory world seemed so near, that I seemed attached to
heaven, not by a cord, but by a mighty cable. I shall never be able to
express how satisfied I was with God's church. Some sectarian preachers
prophesied that I should soon be back preaching for the denominations. One
of them was heard to say, "If I knew that Mary Cole would come and help us
in a meeting, I would send for her; but I am afraid she won't." I never got
any more special calls from Babylon.
Shortly after I got light on the one body, however, the devil laid a snare
for me. I saw the snare before I got into it, and God's Word was fulfilled:
"In vain is the net spread in the sight of any bird." It happened in this
way: A certain man who was starting a new sect tried to interest all he
could in his project. He did not call his new religious movement by any
special name and professed not to have anything to join. He would have the
people come and shake hands, inferring that in so doing they were not
joining anything, but were merely showing their mutual love and fellowship.
In order to be an encouragement to any that might really be trying to live
for the Lord, I went up and shook hands with the preacher and others. After
we had shaken hands, his design became apparent. He seated me and a few
others on one side of the platform and called for others to come and shake
hands with us. The Lion of the tribe of Judah began to roar in my soul. I
got up very quickly, and the plan was defeated.
A common remark made to me by sectarians was, "You ought to join some
denomination so that you will be inside the pale of the church," thus
inferring that because I did not belong to a human organization, I was not
in good pasture, but outside on the commons with poor, ill-fed stock. I
understood the figure of speech very well, for I was brought up on a farm
where the garden was enclosed with palings. Between these palings were
spaces through which small animals could get in and destroy the
vegetables--a very good illustration of the sectarian churches surrounded
by their palings, through which unclean spirits can slip in and destroy the
flock. In the church of God I feel secure; because God has appointed
salvation for her walls and bulwarks (Isaiah 26:1), and through these
neither evil spirits, nor even the devil himself can penetrate.
I was educated to believe, and in this way I often expressed myself, that
the M. E. denomination was my spiritual mother. This idea remained with me
until I got light on the sin of division and was spiritually able to
discern the bride of Christ. Then I saw that "Jerusalem from above is the
mother of us all." I saw plainly that if I had two mothers, one must be a
stepmother. While my mother was living I never cared to have a stepmother.
The prophecies of Scripture so unmistakably point to the one church, the
body of Christ, that they can be but poorly explained by those who are
trying to make them conform to sectarian theology. I am content with the
church of God, with Christ as the door, and nothing inside but the holy
throng.
Besides, in sectarianism I did not have freedom in my ministry. I could
preach only as the sect ministers suggested. If God gave me more light, and
I tried to give it to the people, I was likely to receive a rebuke. I
remember that at one time while I was holding a meeting for some
denomination, God led me to preach on holiness. In the very beginning of
the meeting they had advised me not to preach on this subject. What was I
to do? The Lord reminded that I had promised I would preach any part of his
Word whenever and wherever he led me to do so. He now brought me face to
face with the question, "What will you do?" I said, "Lord, I will obey you
if you will stand by me." The Lord assured me that he would. I preached on
sanctification as a distinct second work of grace, God witnessing to the
message by his mighty power. After the service, the minister who had placed
the restrictions upon me, said, "Sister Cole, that is the best sermon you
preached during the whole meeting." I answered, "I knew that the things you
didn't want were the things you needed."
After the Lord had led me into the precious truth of the oneness of his
people, I was much better satisfied with what God did with me and through
me, with the meetings I held, and with the results attained. Although at
times not as many people professed salvation now as when I was preaching
for the denomination, yet those who got saved reached a settled experience,
being satisfied that they were in God's order. They were not looking around
for something that more nearly represented the truth. As a minister I was
satisfied, knowing that I was delivering the whole counsel of God. No one
ever can be satisfied who is not walking in every ray of light that God
turns on his pathway.