REGRETS.
Though most of those in whom we have taken such deep interest have left
the Province far behind, we cannot bear the thought of following them
until more fond ties be broken that binds them to our native home. Ah!
were we to consider every fond tie, there could be no hope for
separation. There are ties which bind the heart as lovingly as those of
friendship, there are ties which cling while we breath the inspiration
of every page within the universal volumes of Heaven's choicest
productions--the great book of nature--the teacher and refiner of the
soul. This is the tie which clings to us through the medium of holy
thought, inspiring, elevating and cheering.
Among those who most deeply felt the departure of the inmates of
Government House, none were more reserved in their demonstrations than
Captain Trevelyan, who calmly watched each successive step in the order
of preparation with a quiet reserve that to the uninitiated would appear
as void of feeling.
But the brave and handsome officer showed not the fathomless depths and
feelings of his true heart, which throbbed with a renewed emotion. With
a sense of utter loneliness he lamented the bitter misfortune which had
been his attendant since he had left the peaceful home of his
fatherland. Mary Douglas, his kind friend and companion, had been as a
gentle and loving sister to raise for a time his flagging spirits. Mr.
Howe had ever been at his side to show unceasing acts of kindness and
brighten those dark hours with a tender but inexpressive sympathy.
Captain Trevelyan could never forget the motives which actuated these,
still he did not exhibit any outward show of gratitude save by a firm
and passive confidence.
Knowing the true nature of such friendship, Mr. Howe would have
experienced deeper regret at parting were he not aware that he would
meet Captain Trevelyan early in the following year.
Left to the undisturbed quiet of his own thoughts, Captain Trevelyan
formed many plans regarding his future career. A work was steadily going
on within while he attended the duties devolving upon him in connection
with his military life.
It had always been the true aim of this soldier to discharge his labors
faithfully and with a desire to please. His genial nature and generous
heart gained the popularity of the entire regiment. Not only did he
treat his superior officers with profound respect but his inferiors as
well. Every subordinate officer and private loved to meet his friendly
smile. Every one vied in doing some act that would receive his
approbation. Truly did Colonel Creagh make the following remark to a
distinguished General, who was inspecting the troops: "If ever man were
born who possessed not a single enemy, I believe that man is Captain
Trevelyan."
"I believe you," returned the General, "goodness is stamped upon his
handsome face, but seldom is it so clearly defined as to insure such
general approval."
"Sometimes," added the Colonel, "I have doubts regarding the serious
intentions of our friend. It has been whispered that he begins to weary
of the service. I have not had sufficient reason to confirm the truth of
the statement, but I shall feel much dissatisfied if it prove correct.
Sir Howard Douglas always maintained that Trevelyan is a scion of the
old stock, that he possesses the same qualities that distinguished his
father. It would indeed be a source of regret were all to be
disappointed by his retirement," said the Colonel, in a tone of deep
earnestness.
"If the family resources are large he may have sufficient reason for
such an act," ventured the General interrogatively.
"Sir Guy Trevelyan," said the Colonel, by way of explanation, "owns a
fine old estate in Hampshire, which yields a moderate income. His only
son will be his direct heir, and Captain Trevelyan can at any
opportunity enjoy the ease and retirement of private life."
"I should not be surprised were he to avail himself of the departure of
the regiment," exclaimed the general, adding, "there is not much
distinction now to be gained in the service. Captain Trevelyan might
remain an honorable officer in His Majesty's service for years to come
and not attain the position marked out by his distinguished parent."
Many remarks were thus applied to this officer by the gallant colonel of
the 81st Regiment. Every sentence showed not only the high esteem in
which Captain Trevelyan was held by the veteran of Waterloo, but the
fears entertained by the latter in regard to his rumoured retirement.
Not long after the above conversation took place Fredericton was to
witness another departure--the gallant 81st, under orders, were to be
relieved by the 1st Battalion of the Rifle Brigade. The same formalities
of interchanging regrets were to be passed between those departing and
the citizens. The same congratulations were to be presented in
appreciation of the high esteem entertained towards the entire regiment
in the presentation of testimonials and other marks of respect.
The morning preceding the departure of the company to which Captain
Trevelyan was attached, afterwards formed an important one in his life.
Colonel Creagh's fears were realized by intimation from Captain Trevelyan
with intention to make application for a discharge immediately on his
arrival in England.
After long and grave deliberation he had fully made up his mind, while a
letter received from his sister gave twofold assurance of the great
delight which such news communicated to the family.
As this young girl will now be introduced to the reader, we take the
liberty of inserting the letter, showing the tenderness of feeling
existing between the brother and sister, the fond anticipation breathed
through every sentence, and the deep interest manifested in the friends
of the absent one.
Frequently did Guy Trevelyan re-open the envelope and bring forth the
precious missive, written in a delicate feminine hand, containing the
following:--
Trevelyan Hall, near Winchester, Sept. 19th, 1830.
_Dear Brother Guy_,--
Your fond letter of the 20th was received in due time, conveying
the most delightful news that ever was written. How can I await
your dear presence? Really it seems almost too much happiness to
realize that you will once more return home to remain. Papa writes
that he warmly approves of your decision, intimating that I must
have been instrumental in procuring such good fortune for us all. I
dare not dream too fondly lest by some means I may be disappointed;
but, dearest Guy, once restored to us, our delight will be
unbounded.
You must not expect to have a very long letter this time, as I
cannot settle my thoughts to think of aught but yourself and "The
Restoration." If the second be not of such universal display as the
one so grandly portrayed in history, it is doubtful whether the
sincerity attending the latter be not of a more lasting nature and
one showing the true affections of loyal and devoted hearts.
I had almost forgotten to mention that I have frequently met Mary
Douglas, who is, at present, visiting her friend Maude Bereford, at
the Castle. Also, had the pleasure of being introduced to your
friend Mr. Howe, and feel a deep interest in him on your behalf.
Imagine my delight when he informed me of his intention to accept
your invitation to remain with us for a few days on your arrival.
It seems that I cannot remember anything. I must not forget this
time to say that great anxiety is expressed and felt at the Castle
regarding the failing health of Lady Rosamond's husband--Mr. Gerald
Bereford. For some time past he has sadly impaired his constitution
by taxing his powers beyond endurance, and when almost too late, he
withdrew from political life. Great sympathy is extended Lady
Rosamond who seems very despondent. Medical advice suggests change
of climate, and I have heard that they intend to spend the winter
in Italy. Not wishing to give any more news until I see you at
home, dear Guy, and having nothing further to add but our love,
I remain your expectant
Fanny.
Fanny Trevelyan's letter had a double effect upon the mind of the
recipient. It involved both happiness and despondent gloom, and
unconsciously had struck a tender chord which vibrated with redoubled
sadness in its deep sympathy.
Why do the waking echoes of the past take cruel delight in presenting to
the mind visions which otherwise would be laid aside in a retired recess
or a secret chamber sacred to the relics of other days and other scenes?
Why are those realities to present themselves in merciless and mocking
array to gloat upon our sufferings with fiendish delight? These are
questions only to be answered when the causes which call them forth have
ceased to exist.
Captain Trevelyan's retirement was the subject of much concern for the
officers and men. Many discussions arose as to the motive. Lieutenant
Creagh remonstrated, but to no purpose. As the slow sailing ship bore
the gallant regiment across the Atlantic, hope reigned supreme in many
hearts. Friends and home greeted them on arrival. At Gosport, Captain
Trevelyan took formal leave, having received the strongest proofs of
sincere friendship existing between man and his fellowbeings.
Great was the joy that awaited Guy Trevelyan as he once more entered the
fine old park enclosing the grounds of "Trevelyan Hall." His mother, a
staid and stately English matron, forgot all dignity as she threw
herself fondly into his arms. Fanny, the pet of the household, clung to
her brother with tightening embrace, showering him with kisses pure as
her maiden heart. Nor was the dutiful son less tender in his expressions
of joy, as lovingly he gazed upon the fair girl seated with her arm upon
his shoulder. He could scarcely realize that the little girl of twelve
was now the lovely maiden of eighteen almost matured into a gentle and
loveable woman. In her sweet childish manner Guy Trevelyan found much to
admire. The firm, steady gaze of her deep blue eyes had a power to rivet
the attention of the beholder, that puzzled him. He knew from the calm
and earnest tenor of his sister's manner that her heart was unfettered
by any deeper attachment than those of family ties. In the bitterness of
his feelings he thanked Heaven for this fond assurance, fervently
praying that the love of his pet sister would never be given where it
would never be returned.
He now listened with eager curiosity to the affairs of Lady Rosamond.
Her husband had indeed, when too late, listened to her urgent
admonitions. He had resigned his seat in parliament when his physical
powers were a mere wreck of his former self. Disease had crept in by
stealth and was only too truly realized by the deep ravages thus
made--by the wasted and emaciated form--the feverish cheek and sunken
eye.
The noble sympathetic nature of the dutiful wife felt a severe shock as
she daily was brought face to face with the dreaded fact--the awakening
reality of her husband's condition. Every care that could be bestowed by
the hand of woman was lavished upon Gerald Bereford with unceasing and
untiring devotion. No duty was too troublesome, no wish was slighted,
except that which urged her ladyship to be more attentive to her
personal wants. Every sacrifice must be made that can possibly give
returning health and strength to the future lord of Bereford Castle. No
bitter repinings now possessed the heroic woman. Her whole being was
thrown into the scale to balance the opposing weight which crushed her
husband's almost lifeless existence. The voice of one who repeatedly
made the halls of parliament ring with deafening applause was now with
an effort heard by those standing near.
It was when such trouble bore heavily that Mary Douglas opened her heart
towards her friend Lady Rosamond. She came unbidden to offer such
service as was in her power to perform. She silently watched by the side
of Gerald Bereford with that gentle caution so needful when suffering is
apparent, or when an interval of pain or depression is to be guarded
against as a thief in disguise.
Not a single expression ever passed between those friends with reference
to any thing that happened in Fredericton. Mary Douglas was careful to
avoid any allusion to circumstances which might call up a sudden host of
by-gone fancies which, ere this, should be consigned to the remotest
regions in the realm of utter oblivion. She was now the friend and
sympathizer of Lady Rosamond Bereford, not the childish maiden as when
first introduced, but a lovely, gifted, talented and accomplished woman,
whose mind matured with her years. Time has not lain heavily on her
hands, she having labored assiduously in exercising those talents
committed to her keeping. In after years we find the following: "Her
gifts were so varied that she was both a composer and musician, a
novelist and poet." The friend of Lady Rosamond Bereford was not to be
affected by the emotions of Lady Rosamond Seymour. The past was a sealed
casket, forever sacred to the intrusion of the present. This was the
state of feeling that existed between those noble women as they
ministered to the wants of Gerald Bereford.
What fervent prayers were offered for the dutiful and self-sacrificing
wife as she tried to win a smile from the patient invalid. What grateful
love went forth to her as she pressed the lips of her uncomplaining
husband. In sickness as in health she had never seen his frown. His life
had been a constant source of happiness. Lady Rosamond had been the
day-star which illuminated his path with undimmed lustre and brilliancy.
In her presence he felt not the weight of suffering that at intervals
seized his exhausted frame. As symptoms of the disease began to abate
and recovery was expected, her ladyship, accompanied her husband to
Italy, where they had intended to remove some time previous, but were
prevented by a relapse of the invalid.