ELIZABETH
Although this memorable Queen was a man, she was constantly addressed
by her courtiers by various affectionate female nicknames, such as
Aurora-borealis, Ruritania, Black Beauty (or Bête Noire) and Brown
Bess. She also very graciously walked on Sir Walter Raleigh’s overcoat
whenever he dropped it in the mud and was, in fact, in every respect a
good and romantic Queen.
WAVE OF BEARDS
One of the most romantic aspects of the Elizabethan age was the wave
of beards which suddenly swept across History and settled upon all the
great men of the period. The most memorable of these beards was the
cause of the outstanding event of the reign, which occurred in the
following way.
[Illustration: Wave of Beards]
THE GREAT ARMADILLO
[Illustration: Spanish Mane]
The Spaniards complained that Captain F. Drake, the memorable bowlsman,
had singed the King of Spain’s beard (or Spanish Mane, as it was
called) one day when it was in Cadiz Harbour. Drake replied that he
was in his hammock at the time and a thousand miles away. The King of
Spain, however, insisted that the beard had been spoilt and sent the
Great Spanish Armadillo to ravish the shores of England.
The crisis was boldly faced in England, especially by Big Bess herself,
who instantly put on an enormous quantity of clothing and rode to and
fro on a white horse at Tilbury--a courageous act which was warmly
applauded by the English sailors.
In this striking and romantic manner the English were once more
victorious.
THE QUEEN OF HEARTS
A great nuisance in this reign was the memorable Scottish queen, known
as Mary Queen of Hearts on account of the large number of husbands
which she obtained, e.g. Cardinale Ritzio, Boswell and the King of
France: most of these she easily blew up at Holywood.
Unfortunately for Mary, Scotland was now suddenly overrun by a wave of
Synods led by Sir John Nox, the memorable Scottish Saturday Knight.
Unable to believe, on account of the number of her husbands, that Mary
was a single person, the Knight accused her of being a “monstrous
regiment of women,” and after making this brave remark had her
imprisoned in Loch Lomond. Mary, however, escaped and fled to England,
where Elizabeth immediately put her in quarantine on the top of an
enormous Height called Wutheringay.
As Mary had already been Queen of France and Queen of Scotland many
people thought that it would be unfair if she was not made Queen of
England as well. Various plots, such as the Paddington Plot, the
Threadneedle Conspiracy and the Adelfi Plot, were therefore hatched to
bring this about. Elizabeth, however, learning that in addition to all
this Mary was good-looking and could play on the virginals, recognized
that Mary was too romantic not to be executed, and accordingly had that
done.
MASSACRE OF ST. BARTHOLOMEW
Further evidence of Queen Elizabeth’s chivalrous nature is given by
her sympathy towards the French Protestants or Hugonauts (so called
on account of their romantic leader Victor Hugo). These Arguenots
were very much incensed at this time about St. Bartholomew, a young
Saint, who had been unjustly massacred for refusing to tie a white
handkerchief round his arm. After the massacre the French King,
Henry of Navarre, turned Roman Catholic and made his memorable
confession--“Paris is rather a Mess”; whereupon Queen Elizabeth very
gallantly sent her favourite, Leicester, to find out whether this was
true, thus rendering valuable assistance to the Hugonot cause.
ELIZABETH AND ESSEX
Memorable amongst the men with beards in Elizabeth’s reign was the
above-mentioned favourite, Essex (Robert Dudleigh, Earl of Leicester),
whom she brought to execution by mistake in the following romantic
manner. Essex was sent to Ireland to quell a rebellion which the Irish
were very treacherously carrying on in a bog in Munster. Becoming
fatigued with the rebellion, however, he dashed out of the bog straight
into the Queen’s bedroom. For this Essex was sent to the Tower, where
he was shortly afterwards joined by other favourites of the Queen
(such as Burleigh, Sidneigh, Watneigh, Hurlingham, etc.). Essex had
a secret arrangement with Queen Elizabeth that he was to give her a
ring whenever he was going to be executed, and she would reprieve
him. But although, according to the arrangement, he tried to get into
communication with the Queen, he was given the wrong number and was
thus executed after all, along with the other favourites.
“God may forgive you,” was Brown Bess’s memorable comment to the
operator, “but I never will.”