LONDON, _Dec._ 12, 1712.
HERE is now a stlange ting; a rettle flom MD unanswered: never was
before. I am slower, and MD is faster: but the last was owing to DD’s
certificate. Why could it not be sent before, pay now? Is it so hard
for DD to prove she is alive? I protest solemnly I am not able to write
to MD for other business, but I will resume my journal method next time.
I find it is easier, though it contains nothing but where I dine, and the
occurrences of the day. I will write now but once in three weeks till
this business is off my hands, which must be in six, I think, at
farthest. O Ppt, I remember your reprimanding me for meddling in other
people’s affairs: I have enough of it now, with a wanion. {472b} Two
women have been here six times apiece; I never saw them yet. The first I
have despatched with a letter; the other I must see, and tell her I can
do nothing for her: she is wife of one Connor, {472c} an old college
acquaintance, and comes on a foolish errand, for some old pretensions,
that will succeed when I am Lord Treasurer. I am got [up] two pair of
stairs, in a private lodging, and have ordered all my friends not to
discover where I am; yet every morning two or three sots are plaguing me,
and my present servant has not yet his lesson perfect of denying me. I
have written a hundred and thirty pages in folio, to be printed, and must
write thirty more, which will make a large book of four shillings. {472d}
I wish I knew an opportunity of sending you some snuff. I will watch who
goes to Ireland, and do it if possible. I had a letter from Parvisol,
and find he has set my livings very low. Colonel Hamilton, who was
second to the Duke of Hamilton, is tried to-day. I suppose he is come
off, but have not heard. {473a} I dined with Lord Treasurer, but left
him by nine, and visited some people. Lady Betty, {473b} his {473c}
daughter, will be married on Monday next (as I suppose) to the Marquis of
Caermarthen. I did not know your country place had been Portraine, till
you told me so in your last. Has Swanton taken it of Wallis? That
Wallis was a grave, wise coxcomb. God be thanked that Ppt im better of
her disoddles. {473d} Pray God keep her so. The pamphlet of _Political
Lying_ is written by Dr. Arbuthnot, the author of _John Bull_; ’tis very
pretty, but not so obvious to be understood. Higgins, {473e} first
chaplain to the Duke of Hamilton? Why, the Duke of Hamilton never dreamt
of a chaplain, nor I believe ever heard of Higgins. You are glorious
newsmongers in Ireland—Dean Francis, {473f} Sir R. Levinge, {473g} stuff
stuff: and Pratt, more stuff. We have lost our fine frost here; and Abel
Roper tells as you have had floods in Dublin; ho, brave {473h} you! Oh
ho! Swanton seized Portraine, now I understand oo. Ay, ay, now I see
Portraune at the top of your letter. I never minded it before. Now to
your second, N. 36. So, you read one of the Grub Streets about the
bandbox. {473i} The Whig papers have abused me about the bandbox. God
help me, what could I do? I fairly ventured my life. There is a
particular account of it in the _Postboy_, and Evening Post of that day.
Lord Treasurer has had the seal sent him that sealed the box, and
directions where to find the other pistol in a tree in St. James’s Park,
which Lord Bolingbroke’s messenger found accordingly; but who sent the
present is not yet known. The Duke of Hamilton avoided the quarrel as
much as possible, according to the foppish rules of honour in practice.
What signified your writing angry to Filby? I hope you said nothing of
hearing anything from me. Heigh! do oo write by sandlelight! nauti,
nauti, nauti dallar, a hundred times, fol doing so. O, fais, DD, I’ll
take care of myself! The Queen is in town, and Lady Masham’s month of
lying-in is within two days of being out. I was at the christening on
Monday. I could not get the child named Robin, after Lord Treasurer; it
is Samuel, after the father. My brother Ormond sent me some chocolate
to-day. I wish you had share of it: but they say ’tis good for me, and I
design to drink some in a morning. Our Society meets next Thursday, now
the Queen is in town; and Lord Treasurer assures me that the Society for
reforming the language shall soon be established. I have given away ten
shillings to-day to servants; ’tan’t be help if one should cry one’s eyes
out. {474} Hot a stir is here about your company and visits! Charming
company, no doubt; now I keep no company at all, nor have I any desire to
keep any. I never go to a coffee-house nor a tavern, nor have touched a
card since I left Windsor. I make few visits, nor go to levees; my only
debauching is sitting late where I dine, if I like the company. I have
almost dropped the Duchesses of Shrewsbury and Hamilton, and several
others. Lord Treasurer, the Duke of Ormond, and Lady Orkney are all that
I see very often. Oh yes, and Lady Masham and Lord Bolingbroke, and one
or two private friends. I make no figure but at Court, where I affect to
turn from a lord to the meanest of my acquaintance, and I love to go
there on Sundays to see the world. But, to say the truth, I am growing
weary of it. I dislike a million of things in the course of public
affairs; and if I were to stay here much longer, I am sure I should ruin
myself with endeavouring to mend them. I am every day invited into
schemes of doing this, but I cannot find any that will probably succeed.
It is impossible to save people against their own will; and I have been
too much engaged in patchwork already. Do you understand all this stuff?
No. Well zen, you are now returned to ombre and the Dean, and Christmas;
I wish oo a very merry one; and pray don’t lose oo money, nor play upon
Watt Welch’s game. Nite, sollahs, ’tis rate I’ll go to seep; I don’t
seep well, and therefore never dare to drink coffee or tea after dinner:
but I am very seepy in a molning. This is the effect of time and years.
Nite deelest MD.
18. Morn. I am so very seepy in the morning that my man wakens me above
ten times; and now I can tell oo no news of this day. (Here is a
restless dog, crying cabbages and savoys, plagues me every morning about
this time; he is now at it. I wish his largest cabbage were sticking in
his throat.) I lodge over against the house in Little Rider Street,
where DD lodged. Don’t oo lememble, maram? To-night I must see the Abbé
Gaultier, {475a} to get some particulars for my History. It was he who
was first employed by France in the overtures of peace, and I have not
had time this month to see him; he is but a puppy too. Lady Orkney has
just sent to invite me to dinner; she has not given me the bed-nightgown;
{475b} besides, I am come very much off from writing in bed, though I am
doing it this minute; but I stay till my fire is burnt up. My grate is
very large; two bushels of coals in a week: but I save it in lodgings.
Lord Abercorn is come to London, and will plague me, and I can do him no
service. The Duke of Shrewsbury goes in a day or two for France, perhaps
to-day. We shall have a peace very soon; the Dutch are almost entirely
agreed, and if they stop we shall make it without them; that has been
long resolved. One Squire Jones, {475c} a scoundrel in my parish, has
writ to me to desire I would engage Joe Beaumont to give him his interest
for Parliament-man for Trim: pray tell Joe this; and if he designed to
vote for him already, then he may tell Jones that I received his letter,
and that I writ to Joe to do it. If Joe be engaged for any other, then
he may do what he will: and Parvisol may say he spoke to Joe, but Joe’s
engaged, etc. I received three pair of fine thread stockings from Joe
lately. Pray thank him when you see him, and that I say they are very
fine and good. (I never looked at them yet, but that’s no matter.) This
is a fine day. I am ruined with coaches and chairs this twelvepenny
weather. I must see my brother Ormond at eleven, and then the Duchess of
Hamilton, with whom I doubt I am in disgrace, not having seen her these
ten days. I send this to-day, and must finish it now; and perhaps some
people may come and hinder me; for it im ten o’clock (but not
shaving-day), and I must be abroad at eleven. Abbé Gaultier sends me
word I can’t see him to-night; pots cake him! I don’t value anything but
one letter he has of Petecum’s, {476a} showing the roguery of the Dutch.
Did not the _Conduct of the Allies_ make you great politicians? Fais, I
believe you are not quite so ignorant as I thought you. I am glad to
hear oo walked so much in the country. Does DD ever read to you, ung
ooman? O, fais! I shall find strange doings hen I tum ole! {476b} Here
is somebody coming that I must see that wants a little place; the son of
cousin Rooke’s eldest daughter, that died many years ago. He’s here.
Farewell, deelest MD MD MD ME ME ME FW FW FW, Lele.