THE BALL.
I have often dressed for a storming party with less of trepidation than I
felt on the evening of Sir George Dashwood’s ball. Since the eventful day
of the election I had never seen Miss Dashwood; therefore, as to what
precise position I might occupy in her favor was a matter of great doubt in
my mind, and great import to my happiness. That I myself loved her, was
a matter of which all the badinage of my friends regarding her made
me painfully conscious; but that, in our relative positions, such an
attachment was all but hopeless, I could not disguise from myself. Young as
I was, I well knew to what a heritage of debt, lawsuit, and difficulty I
was born to succeed. In my own resources and means of advancement I had no
confidence whatever, had even the profession to which I was destined been
more of my choice. I daily felt that it demanded greater exertions, if not
far greater abilities, than I could command, to make success at all likely;
and then, even if such a result were in store, years, at least, must elapse
before it could happen; and where would she then be, and where should I?
Where the ardent affection I now felt and gloried in,--perhaps all the more
for its desperate hopelessness,--when the sanguine and buoyant spirit to
combat with difficulties which youth suggests, and which, later, manhood
refuses, should have passed away? And even if all these survived the toil
and labor of anxious days and painful nights, what of her? Alas, I now
reflected that, although only of my own age, her manner to me had taken all
that tone of superiority and patronage which an elder assumes towards
one younger, and which, in the spirit of protection it proceeds upon,
essentially bars up every inlet to a dearer or warmer feeling,--at least,
when the lady plays the former part. “What, then, is to be done?” thought
I. “Forget her?--but how? How shall I renounce all my plans, and unweave
the web of life I have been spreading around me for many a day, without
that one golden thread that lent it more than half its brilliancy and all
its attraction? But then the alternative is even worse, if I encourage
expectations and nurture hopes never to be realized. Well, we meet
to-night, after a long and eventful absence; let my future fate be ruled by
the results of this meeting. If Lucy Dashwood does care for me, if I can
detect in her manner enough to show me that my affection may meet a return,
the whole effort of my life shall be to make her mine; if not, if my
own feelings be all that I have to depend upon to extort a reciprocal
affection, then shall I take my last look of her, and with it the first and
brightest dream of happiness my life has hitherto presented.”
* * * * *
It need not be wondered at if the brilliant _coup d’oeil_ of the ball-room,
as I entered, struck me with astonishment, accustomed as I had hitherto
been to nothing more magnificent than an evening party of squires and
their squiresses or the annual garrison ball at the barracks. The glare of
wax-lights, the well-furnished saloons, the glitter of uniforms, and the
blaze of plumed and jewelled dames, with the clang of military music, was a
species of enchanted atmosphere which, breathing for the first time, rarely
fails to intoxicate. Never before had I seen so much beauty. Lovely faces,
dressed in all the seductive flattery of smiles, were on every side; and as
I walked from room to room, I felt how much more fatal to a man’s peace and
heart’s ease the whispered words and silent glances of those fair damsels,
than all the loud gayety and boisterous freedom of our country belles, who
sought to take the heart by storm and escalade.
As yet I had seen neither Sir George nor his daughter, and while I looked
on every side for Lucy Dashwood, it was with a beating and anxious heart
I longed to see how she would bear comparison with the blaze of beauty
around.
Just at this moment a very gorgeously dressed hussar stepped from a doorway
beside me, as if to make a passage for some one, and the next moment she
appeared leaning upon the arm of another lady. One look was all that I had
time for, when she recognized me.
“Ah, Mr. O’Malley, how happy--has Sir George--has my father seen you?”
“I have only arrived this moment; I trust he is quite well?”
“Oh, yes, thank you--”
“I beg your pardon with all humility, Miss Dashwood,” said the hussar, in a
tone of the most knightly courtesy, “but they are waiting for us.”
“But, Captain Fortescue, you must excuse me one moment more. Mr. Lechmere,
will you do me the kindness to find out Sir George? Mr. O’Malley--Mr.
Lechmere.” Here she said something in French to her companion, but so
rapidly that I could not detect what it was, but merely heard the reply,
_“Pas mal!”_--which, as the lady continued to canvass me most deliberately
through her eye-glass, I supposed referred to me. “And now, Captain
Fortescue--” And with a look of most courteous kindness to me she
disappeared in the crowd.
The gentleman to whose guidance I was entrusted was one of the
aides-de-camp, and was not long in finding Sir George. No sooner had the
good old general heard my name, than he held out both his hands and shook
mine most heartily.
“At last, O’Malley; at last I am able to thank you for the greatest
service ever man rendered me. He saved Lucy, my Lord; rescued her under
circumstances where anything short of his courage and determination must
have cost her her life.”
“Ah, very pretty indeed,” said a stiff old gentleman addressed, as he
bowed a most superbly powdered scalp before me; “most happy to make your
acquaintance.”
“Who is he?” added he, in nearly as loud a tone to Sir George.
“Mr. O’Malley, of O’Malley Castle.”
“True, I forgot; why is he not in uniform?”
“Because, unfortunately, my Lord, we don’t own him; he’s not in the army.”
“Ha! ha! thought he was.”
“You dance, O’Malley, I suppose? I’m sure you’d rather be over there than
hearing all my protestations of gratitude, sincere and heartfelt as they
really are.”
“Lechmere, introduce my friend, Mr. O’Malley; get him a partner.”
I had not followed my new acquaintance many steps, when Power came up to
me. “I say, Charley,” cried he, “I have been tormented to death by half the
ladies in the room to present you to them, and have been in quest of you
this half-hour. Your brilliant exploit in savage land has made you a
regular _preux chevalier_; and if you don’t trade on that adventure to your
most lasting profit, you deserve to be--a lawyer. Come along here! Lady
Muckleman, the adjutant-general’s lady and chief, has four Scotch daughters
you are to dance with; then I am to introduce you in all form to the Dean
of Something’s niece,--she is a good-looking girl, and has two livings in
a safe county. Then there’s the town-major’s wife; and, in fact, I have
several engagements from this to supper-time.”
“A thousand thanks for all your kindness in prospective, but I think,
perhaps, it were right I should ask Miss Dashwood to dance, if only as a
matter of form,--you understand?”
“And if Miss Dashwood should say, ‘With pleasure, sir,’ only as a matter of
form,--you understand?” said a silvery voice beside me. I turned, and saw
Lucy Dashwood, who, having overheard my free-and-easy suggestion, replied
to me in this manner.
I here blundered out my excuses. What I said, and what I did not say, I do
not now remember; but certainly, it was her turn now to blush, and her arm
trembled within mine as I led her to the top of the room. In the little
opportunity which our quadrille presented for conversation, I could not
help remarking that, after the surprise of her first meeting with me, Miss
Dashwood’s manner became gradually more and more reserved, and that there
was an evident struggle between her wish to appear grateful for what had
occurred, with a sense of the necessity of not incurring a greater degree
of intimacy. Such was my impression, at least, and such the conclusion I
drew from a certain quiet tone in her manner that went further to wound my
feelings and mar my happiness than any other line of conduct towards me
could possibly have effected.
Our quadrille over, I was about to conduct her to a seat, when Sir George
came hurriedly up, his face greatly flushed, and betraying every semblance
of high excitement.
“Dear Papa, has anything occurred? Pray what is it?” inquired she.
He smiled faintly, and replied, “Nothing very serious, my dear, that
I should alarm you in this way; but certainly, a more disagreeable
_contretemps_ could scarcely occur.”
“Do tell me: what can it be?”
“Read this,” said he, presenting a very dirty-looking note which bore the
mark of a red wafer most infernally plain upon its outside.
Miss Dashwood unfolded the billet, and after a moment’s silence, instead of
participating, as he expected, in her father’s feeling of distress, burst
out a-laughing, while she said: “Why, really, Papa, I do not see why this
should put you out much, after all. Aunt may be somewhat of a character, as
her note evinces, but after a few days--”
“Nonsense, child; there’s nothing in this world I have such a dread of as
that confounded woman,--and to come at such a time.”
“When does she speak of paying her visit?”
“I knew you had not read the note,” said Sir George, hastily; “she’s coming
here to-night,--is on her way this instant, perhaps. What is to be done? If
she forces her way in here, I shall go deranged outright; O’Malley, my boy,
read this note, and you will not feel surprised if I appear in the humor
you see me.”
I took the billet from the hands of Miss Dashwood, and read as follows:--
DEAR BROTHER,--When this reaches your hand, I’ll not be far
off. I’m on my way up to town, to be under Dr. Dease for the ould
complaint. Cowley mistakes my case entirely; he says it’s nothing
but religion and wind. Father Magrath, who understands a good
deal about females, thinks otherwise; but God knows who’s right.
Expect me to tea, and, with love to Lucy,
Believe me, yours in haste,
JUDITH MACAN.
_Let the sheets be well aired in my room; and if you have a spare bed,
perhaps we could prevail upon Father Magrath to stop too._
I scarcely could contain my laughter till I got to the end of this very
free-and-easy epistle; when at last I burst forth in a hearty fit, in which
I was joined by Miss Dashwood.
From the account Power had given me in the morning, I had no difficulty in
guessing that the writer was the maiden sister of the late Lady Dashwood;
and for whose relationship Sir George had ever testified the greatest
dread, even at the distance of two hundred miles; and for whom, in any
nearer intimacy, he was in no wise prepared.
“I say, Lucy,” said he, “there’s only one thing to be done: if this horrid
woman does arrive, let her be shown to her room; and for the few days of
her stay in town, we’ll neither see nor be seen by any one.”
Without waiting for a reply, Sir George was turning away to give the
necessary instructions, when the door of the drawing-room was flung open,
and the servant announced, in his loudest voice, “Miss Macan.” Never shall
I forget the poor general’s look of horror as the words reached him; for as
yet, he was too far to catch even a glimpse of its fair owner. As for me, I
was already so much interested in seeing what she was like, that I made my
way through the crowd towards the door. It is no common occurrence that can
distract the various occupations of a crowded ball-room, where, amidst the
crash of music and the din of conversation, goes on the soft, low voice
of insinuating flattery, or the light flirtation of a first acquaintance;
every clique, every coterie, every little group of three or four has its
own separate and private interests, forming a little world of its own, and
caring for and heeding nothing that goes on around; and even when some
striking character or illustrious personage makes his _entrée_, the
attention he attracts is so momentary, that the buzz of conversation is
scarcely, if at all, interrupted, and the business of pleasure continues
to flow on. Not so now, however. No sooner had the servant pronounced the
magical name of Miss Macan, than all seemed to stand still. The spell thus
exercised over the luckless general seemed to have extended to his company;
for it was with difficulty that any one could continue his train of
conversation, while every eye was directed towards the door. About two
steps in advance of the servant, who still stood door in hand, was a tall,
elderly lady, dressed in an antique brocade silk, with enormous flowers
gaudily embroidered upon it. Her hair was powdered and turned back in the
fashion of fifty years before; while her high-pointed and heeled shoes
completed a costume that had not been seen for nearly a century. Her short,
skinny arms were bare and partly covered by a falling flower of old point
lace, while on her hands she wore black silk mittens; a pair of green
spectacles scarcely dimmed the lustre of a most piercing pair of eyes, to
whose effect a very palpable touch of rouge on the cheeks certainly added
brilliancy. There stood this most singular apparition, holding before her
a fan about the size of a modern tea-tray; while at each repetition of her
name by the servant, she curtesied deeply, bestowing the while upon the gay
crowd before her a very curious look of maidenly modesty at her solitary
and unprotected position.
[Illustration: MISS JUDY MACAN.]
As no one had ever heard of the fair Judith, save one or two of Sir
George’s most intimate friends, the greater part of the company were
disposed to regard Miss Macan as some one who had mistaken the character of
the invitation, and had come in a fancy dress. But this delusion was but
momentary, as Sir George, armed with the courage of despair, forced his way
through the crowd, and taking her hand affectionately, bid her welcome to
Dublin. The fair Judy, at this, threw her arms about his neck, and saluted
him with a hearty smack that was heard all over the room.
“Where’s Lucy, Brother? Let me embrace my little darling,” said the lady,
in an accent that told more of Miss Macan than a three-volume biography
could have done. “There she is, I’m sure; kiss me, my honey.”
This office Miss Dashwood performed with an effort at courtesy really
admirable; while, taking her aunt’s arm, she led her to a sofa.
It needed all the poor general’s tact to get over the sensation of this
most _malapropos_ addition to his party; but by degrees the various groups
renewed their occupations, although many a smile, and more than one
sarcastic glance at the sofa, betrayed that the maiden aunt had not escaped
criticism.
Power, whose propensity for fun very considerably out-stripped his sense of
decorum to his commanding officer, had already made his way towards Miss
Dashwood, and succeeded in obtaining a formal introduction to Miss Macan.
“I hope you will do me the favor to dance next set with me, Miss Macan?”
“Really, Captain, it’s very polite of you, but you must excuse me. I was
never anything great in quadrilles; but if a reel or a jig--”
“Oh, dear Aunt, don’t think of it, I beg of you.”
“Or even Sir Roger de Coverley,” resumed Miss Macan.
“I assure you, quite equally impossible.”
“Then I’m certain you waltz,” said Power.
“What do you take me for, young man? I hope I know better. I wish Father
Magrath heard you ask me that question, and for all your laced jacket--”
“Dearest Aunt, Captain Power didn’t mean to offend you; I’m certain he--”
“Well, why did he dare to [_sob, sob_]--did he see anything light about me,
that he [_sob, sob, sob_]--oh, dear! oh, dear! is it for this I came up
from my little peaceful place in the west [_sob, sob, sob_]?--General,
George, dear; Lucy, my love, I’m taken bad. Oh, dear! oh, dear! is there
any whiskey negus?”
Whatever sympathy Miss Macan’s sufferings might have excited in the crowd
about her before, this last question totally routed them, and a most hearty
fit of laughter broke forth from more than one of the bystanders.
At length, however, she was comforted, and her pacification completely
effected by Sir George setting her down to a whist-table. From this moment
I lost sight of her for above two hours. Meanwhile I had little opportunity
of following up my intimacy with Miss Dashwood, and as I rather suspected
that, on more than one occasion, she seemed to avoid our meeting, I took
especial care on my part, to spare her the annoyance.
For one instant only had I any opportunity of addressing her, and then
there was such an evident embarrassment in her manner that I readily
perceived how she felt circumstanced, and that the sense of gratitude to
one whose further advances she might have feared, rendered her constrained
and awkward. “Too true,” said I, “she avoids me. My being here is only a
source of discomfort and pain to her; therefore, I’ll take my leave, and
whatever it may cost me, never to return.” With this intention, resolving
to wish Sir George a very good night, I sought him out for some minutes. At
length I saw him in a corner, conversing with the old nobleman to whom he
had presented me early in the evening.
“True, upon my honor, Sir George,” said he; “I saw it myself, and she did
it just as dexterously as the oldest blackleg in Paris.”
“Why, you don’t mean to say that she cheated?”
“Yes, but I do, though,--turned the ace every time. Lady Herbert said to
me, ‘Very extraordinary it is,--four by honors again.’ So I looked, and
then I perceived it,--a very old trick it is; but she did it beautifully.
What’s her name?”
“Some western name; I forget it,” said the poor general, ready to die with
shame.
“Clever old woman, very!” said the old lord, taking a pinch of snuff; “but
revokes too often.”
Supper was announced at this critical moment, and before I had further
thought of my determination to escape, I felt myself hurried along in the
crowd towards the staircase. The party immediately in front of me were
Power and Miss Macan, who now appeared reconciled, and certainly testified
most openly their mutual feelings of good-will.
“I say, Charley,” whispered Power, as I came along, “it is capital
fun,--never met anything equal to her; but the poor general will never
live through it, and I’m certain of ten day’s arrest for this night’s
proceeding.”
“Any news of Webber?” I inquired.
“Oh, yes, I fancy I can tell something of him; for I heard of some one
presenting himself, and being refused the _entrée_, so that Master Frank
has lost his money. Sit near us, I pray you, at supper. We must take care
of the dear aunt for the niece’s sake, eh?”
Not seeing the force of this reasoning, I soon separated myself from them,
and secured a corner at a side-table. Every supper on such an occasion as
this is the same scene of solid white muslin, faded flowers, flushed faces,
torn gloves, blushes, blanc-mange, cold chicken, jelly, sponge cakes,
spooney young gentlemen doing the attentive, and watchful mammas
calculating what precise degree of propinquity in the crush is safe or
seasonable for their daughters to the mustached and unmarrying lovers
beside them. There are always the same set of gratified elders, like the
benchers in King’s Inn, marched up to the head of the table, to eat, drink,
and be happy, removed from the more profane looks and soft speeches of the
younger part of the creation. Then there are the _hoi polloi_ of outcasts,
younger sons of younger brothers, tutors, governesses, portionless cousins,
and curates, all formed in phalanx round the side-tables, whose primitive
habits and simple tastes are evinced by their all eating off the same plate
and drinking from nearly the same wine-glass,--too happy if some better-off
acquaintance at the long table invites them to “wine,” though the ceremony
on their part is limited to the pantomime of drinking. To this miserable
_tiers etat_ I belonged, and bore my fate with unconcern; for, alas, my
spirits were depressed and my heart heavy. Lucy’s treatment of me was every
moment before me, contrasted with her gay and courteous demeanor to all
save myself, and I longed for the moment to get away.
Never had I seen her looking so beautiful; her brilliant eyes were lit with
pleasure, and her smile was enchantment itself. What would I not have given
for one moment’s explanation, as I took my leave forever!--one brief avowal
of my unalterable, devoted love; for which I sought not nor expected
return, but merely that I might not be forgotten.
Such were my thoughts, when a dialogue quite near me aroused me from my
revery. I was not long in detecting the speakers, who, with their backs
turned to us, were seated at the great table discussing a very liberal
allowance of pigeon-pie, a flask of champagne standing between them.
“Don’t now! don’t I tell ye; it’s little ye know Galway, or ye wouldn’t
think to make up to me, squeezing my foot.”
“Upon my soul, you’re an angel, a regular angel. I never saw a woman suit
my fancy before.”
“Oh, behave now. Father Magrath says--”
“Who’s he?”
“The priest; no less.”
“Oh, confound him!”
“Confound Father Magrath, young man?”
“Well, then, Judy, don’t be angry; I only meant that a dragoon knows rather
more of these matters than a priest.”
“Well, then, I’m not so sure of that. But anyhow, I’d have you to remember
it ain’t a Widow Malone you have beside you.”
“Never heard of the lady,” said Power.
“Sure, it’s a song,--poor creature,--it’s a song they made about her in the
North Cork, when they were quartered down in our county.”
“I wish to Heaven you’d sing it.”
“What will you give me, then, if I do?”
“Anything,--everything; my heart, my life.”
“I wouldn’t give a trauneen for all of them. Give me that old green ring on
your finger, then.”
“It’s yours,” said Power, placing it gracefully upon Miss Macan’s finger;
“and now for your promise.”
“May be my brother might not like it.”
“He’d be delighted,” said Power; “he dotes on music.”
“Does he now?”
“On my honor, he does.”
“Well, mind you get up a good chorus, for the song has one, and here it
is.”
“Miss Macan’s song!” said Power, tapping the table with his knife.
“Miss Macan’s song!” was re-echoed on all sides; and before the luckless
general could interfere, she had begun. How to explain the air I know not,
for I never heard its name; but at the end of each verse a species of echo
followed the last word that rendered it irresistibly ridiculous.
THE WIDOW MALONE.
Did ye hear of the Widow Malone,
Ohone!
Who lived in the town of Athlone,
Alone?
Oh, she melted the hearts
Of the swains in them parts,
So lovely the Widow Malone,
Ohone!
So lovely the Widow Malone.
Of lovers she had a full score,
Or more;
And fortunes they all had galore,
In store;
From the minister down
To the clerk of the crown,
All were courting the Widow Malone,
Ohone!
All were courting the Widow Malone.
But so modest was Mrs. Malone,
‘T was known
No one ever could see her alone,
Ohone!
Let them ogle and sigh,
They could ne’er catch her eye,
So bashful the Widow Malone,
Ohone!
So bashful the Widow Malone.
Till one Mister O’Brien from Clare,
How quare!
It’s little for blushin’ they care
Down there;
Put his arm round her waist,
Gave ten kisses at laste,
“Oh,” says he, “you’re my Molly Malone,
My own;
Oh,” says he, “you’re my Molly Malone.”
And the widow they all thought so shy,
My eye!
Ne’er thought of a simper or sigh,
For why?
But “Lucius,” says she,
“Since you’ve made now so free,
You may marry your Mary Malone,
Ohone!
You may marry your Mary Malone.”
There’s a moral contained in my song,
Not wrong;
And one comfort it’s not very long,
But strong;
If for widows you die,
Larn to _kiss, not_ to _sigh_,
For they’re all like sweet Mistress Malone,
Ohone!
Oh, they’re very like Mistress Malone.
Never did song create such a sensation as Miss Macan’s; and certainly
her desires as to the chorus were followed to the letter, for “The Widow
Malone, ohone!” resounded from one end of the table to the other, amidst
one universal shout of laughter. None could resist the ludicrous effect of
her melody; and even poor Sir George, sinking under the disgrace of his
relationship, which she had contrived to make public by frequent allusions
to her “dear brother the general,” yielded at last, and joined in the mirth
around him.
“I insist upon a copy of ‘The Widow,’ Miss Macan,” said Power.
“To be sure; give me a call to-morrow,--let me see,--about two. Father
Magrath won’t be at home,” said she, with a coquettish look.
“Where, pray, may I pay my respects?”
“No. 22 South Anne Street,--very respectable lodgings. I’ll write the
address in your pocket-book.”
Power produced a card and pencil, while Miss Macan wrote a few lines,
saying, as she handed it:--
“There, now, don’t read it here before the people; they’ll think it mighty
indelicate in me to make an appointment.”
Power pocketed the card, and the next minute Miss Macan’s carriage was
announced.
Sir George Dashwood, who little flattered himself that his fair guest
had any intention of departure, became now most considerately attentive,
reminded her of the necessity of muffling against the night air, hoped she
would escape cold, and wished her a most cordial good-night, with a promise
of seeing her early the following day.
Notwithstanding Power’s ambition to engross the attention of the lady, Sir
George himself saw her to her carriage, and only returned to the room as a
group was collecting around the gallant captain, to whom he was relating
some capital traits of his late conquest,--for such he dreamed she was.
“Doubt it who will,” said he, “she has invited me to call on her to-morrow,
written her address on my card, told me the hour she is certain of being
alone. See here!” At these words he pulled forth the card, and handed it to
Lechmere.
Scarcely were the eyes of the other thrown upon the writing, when he said,
“So, this isn’t it, Power.”
“To be sure it is, man,” said Power. “Anne Street is devilish seedy, but
that’s the quarter.”
“Why, confound it, man!” said the other; “there’s not a word of that here.”
“Read it out,” said Power. “Proclaim aloud my victory.”
Thus urged, Lechmere read:--
DEAR P.,--
Please pay to my credit,--and soon, mark ye!--the two ponies
lost this evening. I have done myself the pleasure of enjoying your
ball, kissed the lady, quizzed the papa, and walked into the cunning
Fred Power. Yours,
FRANK WEBBER.
“The Widow Malone, ohone!” is at your service.
Had a thunderbolt fallen at his feet, his astonishment could not have
equalled the result of this revelation. He stamped, swore, raved, laughed,
and almost went deranged. The joke was soon spread through the room, and
from Sir George to poor Lucy, now covered with blushes at her part in the
transaction, all was laughter and astonishment.
“Who is he? That is the question,” said Sir George, who, with all the
ridicule of the affair hanging over him, felt no common relief at the
discovery of the imposition.
“A friend of O’Malley’s,” said Power, delighted, in his defeat, to involve
another with himself.
“Indeed!” said the general, regarding me with a look of a very mingled
cast.
“Quite true, sir,” said I, replying to the accusation that his manner
implied; “but equally so, that I neither knew of his plot nor recognized
him when here.”
“I am perfectly sure of it, my boy,” said the general; “and, after all, it
was an excellent joke,--carried a little too far, it’s true; eh, Lucy?”
But Lucy either heard not, or affected not to hear; and after some little
further assurance that he felt not the least annoyed, the general turned to
converse with some other friends; while I, burning with indignation against
Webber, took a cold farewell of Miss Dashwood, and retired.