[Illustration: OPPOSITION APPROVAL OF THE NEW BOYS.
{ MR. WINSTON CHURCHILL (_patting Sir EDWARD CARSON on the back_) }
{ MR. HERBERT SAMUEL (_patting Mr. BONAR LAW on the back_) }
"HE'S BEEN TALKING SENSE."]
_Monday, February 19th_.--The CHANCELLOR OF THE EXCHEQUER announced that
the "new money" subscribed for the War Loan amounted to at least seven
hundred millions. Being a modest man he refrained from saying, "A loan, I
did it," though it was largely due to his faith in the generosity and good
sense of his fellow-citizens that the rate of interest was not more onerous
to the State.
Mr. LYNCH thinks it would be a good idea if Ireland were specially
represented at the Peace Conference, in order that her delegates might
assert her right to self-government. I dare say, if pressed, he would be
prepared to nominate at least one of her representatives. Having regard to
the Nationalist attitude towards military service Mr. BALFOUR might have
retorted that only belligerents would be represented at the Peace
Conference, but he contented himself with a simple negative.
There is an erroneous impression that Mr. LLOYD GEORGE sits in his private
room scheming out new Departments and murmuring like the gentleman in the
advertisement of the elastic bookcase, "How beautifully it grows!" Up to
the present, however, there are only thirty-three actual Ministers of the
Crown, not counting such small fry as Under-Secretaries, and their salaries
merely amount to the trifle of £133,500. It is pleasant to learn that a
branch of the Shipping Controller's department is appropriately housed in
the Lake Dwellings in St. James's Park; and, in view of Mr. KING'S
objection that the members of the Secret Service with whom he has come into
contact make no sort of secret about their business (one pictures them
confiding in this gentleman), it is expected that the Board of Works will
shortly commandeer a strip of Tube Railway to conceal them in.
_Tuesday, February 20th_.--In one respect the two representatives of the
War Office in the House of Commons are singularly alike. When answering
their daily catechism both wear spectacles--Mr. FORSTER an ordinary
gold-rimmed pair, Mr. MACPHERSON the fearsome tortoise-shell variety which
gives an air of antiquity to the most youthful countenance; and each, when
he has to answer an awkward "supplementary," begins by carefully taking off
his glasses and so giving himself an extra moment or two to frame a telling
reply.
This afternoon Mr. MACPHERSON'S spectacles were on and off half-a-dozen
times as he withstood an assault directed from various quarters against the
refusal of the War Office to admit the profession of "manipulative surgery"
to the Army Medical Service. In vain he was informed of wonderful cures
effected by this means on generals and admirals, and even members of the
Government; in vain Mr. LYNCH sought from him an admission that the life of
one private soldier was more valuable than that of the two Front Benches
put together. All these attempts at manipulative surgery quite failed to
reduce Mr. MACPHERSON'S obstinate stiff neck; and at last the SPEAKER had
to intervene to stop the treatment.
The persistence with which a little knot of Members below the Gangway
advances the proposition that all Germany is longing to make an honourable
peace, and that it is only the insatiate ambition of the Allies which
stands in the way, would be pathetic if it were not mischievous. Mr.
PONSONBY, Mr. TREVELYAN, and Mr. SNOWDEN once more argued this hopeless
case with a good deal of varied ability. A small house listened politely,
but was more impressed by a masterly exposé of the facts by Mr. RONALD
M'NEILL, and an Imperialist slogan by Sir HAMAR GREENWOOD; while later in
the debate Mr. BONAR LAW restated the national aims in the War with a
cogency that drew from Mr. SAMUEL a generous pledge "on behalf of those who
sit opposite the Government" to give Ministers their whole-hearted support.
_Wednesday, February 21st_.--The House learned with satisfaction that crews
of our river gun-boats in Mesopotamia are to get their hard-lying money;
and when the authors of the Turkish _communiqués_ hear of it they are
expected to put in a similar claim.
Lord FISHER was in his customary place over the Clock--his friends all tell
us that he is superior to Time; Lord BERESFORD was at a suitable--I had
almost said respectful--distance from him in the Peers' Gallery; and
conspicuous among the Distinguished Strangers was Sir JOHN JELLICOE. They
and all of us listened intently while for over an hour Sir EDWARD CARSON,
now as much at home on the quarter-deck as ever he was at quarter sessions,
discoursed eloquently and frankly on the wonderful and never-ending work of
the Senior Service.
He did not underestimate the danger of the submarines, or pretend that the
Admiralty had yet discovered any sovran remedy for their attacks. Nor could
he say--for reasons which seemed to satisfy the House--how many of them had
already been captured or sunk. But he told us enough to convict Admiral VON
CAPELLE, who was at that moment declaring that not a single U-boat had been
lost since the opening of the new campaign, of being either singularly
misinformed or highly imaginative.
_Thursday, February 22nd_.--A strange sympathy seems to exist between the
SPEAKER and Mr. GINNELL. Each, I fancy, has a soft spot somewhere. Mr.
LOWTHER'S is in his heart, and makes him go out of his way to help the
wayward Member for North Westmeath. Mr. GINNELL, whose soft spot seems to
be higher up, wanted to show that he did not approve of Mr. MACPHERSON, and
called him an impertinent Minister. Ordered to withdraw the expression, he
substituted "impudent." That would not do either, and there seemed danger
of a deadlock and another expulsion until Mr. LOWTHER suggested that
"incorrect" was a Parliamentary epithet which might suit the hon. Member's
purpose. Mr. GINNELL handsomely accepted this variation in the spirit in
which it was offered.
Sir GEORGE CAVE is the Ministerial maid-of-all-work. Whenever there is a
disagreeable or awkward measure to introduce it falls to the Quite-at-Home
Secretary, if I may borrow an expression coined by my friend, TOBY, M.P.,
for one of Sir GEORGE'S predecessors. So judiciously did he accentuate the
good points and soften the possible asperities of the National Service Bill
that even Sir CHARLES HOBHOUSE, who had come to condemn, remained to bless.
_Friday, February 23rd_.--Owing to a variety of causes, we are short of
tonnage, and unless we manage to grow more and consume less we shall before
very long be within reach of the gaunt finger of Famine. That was the
burden of the PRIME MINISTER'S appeal to the Nation. The farmer is to have
a guaranteed minimum price for his produce, the agricultural labourer is to
be raised to comparative affluence by a minimum wage of 25_s._ a week, and
the rest of us are to go without most of our imported luxuries and a good
many necessities. So impressed were Members by the gloominess of the
prospect that the moment the speech was over they rushed out to secure what
they felt might be their last really substantial luncheon, and Mr. DAVID
MASON, who had nobly essayed to fill the breach caused by Mr. ASQUITH'S
absence, was soon talking to empty benches.
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[Illustration: _The Big 'Un._ "MY DEAR FELLOW! IS IT REALLY TRUE THAT YOU
HAVE TO JOIN UP?"
_The Little 'Un._ "YES; BUT DON'T LET IT GET ABOUT. YOU SEE, THE IDEA IS TO
SPRING IT ON THE GERMANS, AS IT WERE, IN MARCH."]
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[Illustration: ACROBAT, HAVING BEEN OFFICIALLY INFORMED THAT HE BELONGS TO
ONE OF THE NON-ESSENTIAL PROFESSIONS, DETERMINES NEVERTHELESS TO DEVOTE HIS
TALENT TO THE CAUSE OF HIS SUFFERING FELLOW-COUNTRYMEN.]
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