all the nice flower-pots and vases I had left behind in the ward I had
when I was last here, to say nothing of my nice stock of children's
clothes (I had heaps of white sailor blouse tops for the small boys, and
muslin pinafores for the little girls, with pale blue frocks to wear
under the pinafores on high days and holidays); but I did not spend much
on vanities in that ward, as it was not worth while for a short time,
and the more fancy things you have the more it costs you in washing, as
the hospital won't pay for vanities, though it does make a difference to
the look of your ward when visitors go round, and the mothers just love
to see their poor little kiddies dressed up "like a real little lady"
instead of in flannelette!
I liked both the night and the day staff nurse in that ward, and they
were very nice to me (sometimes staff nurses are _not_ nice to a sister
doing temporary work, as they often think they might have been allowed
to do the sister's work themselves).
The ward had been noted for never being without squalling babies, and I
was rather amused to hear from another old nurse of mine that these
staff nurses had learnt that I was very particular about tidiness, and
very anxious that the babies should have no reasonable excuse for
squalling; so they were determined to try to please me in those
respects. One day I came down from the theatre (after being up for
several operations) just at tea-time, and I thought the ward looked
rather untidy, but I wanted my tea so badly and the ward-maid had it all
ready for me, so, after taking a look at the operation cases, I--rather
unwisely--concluded I would drink it before going round to tidy up, and,
of course, before I had finished tea the Matron came in, and I had to
escort her round, inwardly fuming at some crumbs by a child's cot, and
some of the trays brought down from the theatre and not put tidily away;
but Matron was very amiable, and when we got to the door she said,
"Sister, I never remember seeing the ward so trim and neat after a
theatre afternoon, and not a single baby squalling!"--so of course I
told the staff nurse, and she was mightily pleased.
We had had a curious case in the theatre that afternoon--a poor little
scrap of a baby, one day old, born with an imperforate anus; as soon as
they began to give it an anæsthetic it stopped breathing, and after
trying to revive it for some time the surgeon put on his coat and went
away, but we continued doing artificial respiration, and eventually the
child came round; so another surgeon (who was still in the hospital)
came in, and he advised the house surgeon to do colostomy, which he did
very rapidly, and the poor little mite was relieved, but it only lived a
day.
We had a first-rate house surgeon on just then, and he looked after his
dressers well. You have no idea how slack and lazy the dressers
sometimes get if the house surgeon is not keen, and it makes a vast
difference to the patients' comfort.
It happened to be our "take in" week when Bank Holiday came, and we had
a very lively week. Altogether we took in sixteen cases, but a few of
them were injuries to arms or fingers, so they were able to go out again
after a night or two, thus leaving beds free for others.
On Bank Holiday itself things were pretty quiet until the evening, and
then we had four accidents in two hours--an old lady of seventy-nine
with a fractured femur, a baby with a scalp wound (fell from its chair
on to the fender), a little child badly scalded, and a very big and fat
woman with a fractured tibia and fibula, who, I was horrified to find,
was expecting a baby to arrive very shortly, and as none of my nurses
had had any experience of such things, nor had the present night sister,
I felt obliged to keep within hail both night and day; but one Sunday I
thought it seemed safe to go out to church, and another sister promised
to attend if required, and sure enough she _was_ required, but all went
well, and the mother made a good recovery, and I think was rather
pleased to go out with a fine healthy baby, having been saved all the
expense of her confinement.
When the sister of that ward returned, there was a small men's accident
ward vacant, so I was offered that until a larger ward should be free.
I was sorry to leave the children, but the new ward was under the
surgeons for whom I had worked before I went to Egypt, and I was glad to
be on for them again.
It was November when I moved my camp, and I seemed to have hardly had
time to turn round before Christmas was upon us, and a very bright and
cheery Christmas we had, in spite of the fact that we were "taking in,"
and the cases simply streamed in. Altogether we admitted twenty-one
cases during the week for our twenty beds. Of course some kept going
out, but we had to send our most movable patients to sleep in other
wards, so as to keep a bed always ready for the next accident.
Amongst the cases we had two poor fellows who had cut their throats; one
a lad of twenty-one who had had influenza, and the other a man of
thirty-two who had been jilted by a girl. They both had tracheotomy
done, and both did pretty well at first, but I don't think the younger
man wanted to get better, and eventually he got pneumonia and died. The
other man got all right again. All through Christmas week they both had
policemen sitting by them in case they should attempt suicide again, and
these policemen were most useful in helping with the decorations.
At the same time we had a big drayman in, who had fallen off his dray
and got slight concussion of the brain. He did not get quite sensible
for some time (though he was never very ill), and he was always trying
to get out of bed, and whenever any one got up on the ladders to do a
little decorating there would be a call that "No. 10 was getting out,"
and we all had to run to put him back and tuck him up again.
These various interruptions made our decorations a very slow process,
but eventually the ward looked very nice, and I think the patients had a
very happy Christmas; even the two poor cut-throat men seemed quite
pleased and interested in their presents, though they were neither of
them able to enjoy the privilege of a smoke, which all the other men
(including the policemen) so much enjoyed on Christmas Day.
One man who came in with a damaged knee told me that he was a rival
"strong man" to Sandow; and, as he was verging on delirium tremens for
some days, we felt a little anxious until he calmed down; but he proved
to be quite a nice patient.
XXIV
GENERAL HOSPITAL, LONDON,
_December 1899_.
I seem to have been wasting a lot of time this year in being seedy in
one way or another, so I don't think that I have much of interest to
write to you about, and now that the war in South Africa is making us
all excited (as every one feels as if he ought to lend a hand), it is
difficult to think of the trifles that have been filling up our lives
for the last few months.
After I wrote to you last, we had in yet another cut-throat who proved
to be a lunatic, and he gave us a very lively time before we got him
well enough to despatch to an asylum. One day he jumped out of bed in a
great hurry (as he was very fond of doing if the policeman in charge
took his eye off him for a minute), so the man in the next bed called
out "Halloa, mate, where are you off to?" to which he replied, "I've got
a second-class pass for heaven, so I'm off," and it took some persuasion
before he would believe that the train for that destination was not due
yet. Another night he proposed to the night nurse, as he thought they
might get on well in "the fried fish line" together! It is strange how
nervous men are with any one a little bit "off": even some of these big
policemen always call out for us to come if a man gets restless. I am
not a bit afraid of them, and can generally get them to do what I want
with a little chaff; but I am heartily tired of having cut-throats in
the ward: I seem to have had so many of them at one time or another, and
they are a great anxiety.
We had so many accidents in from the railway station near by last winter
that the Superintendent very kindly told me (as one of the accident
sisters) I might have a free pass any week-end that I liked to apply for
it to any station on their line; so I had a very good time going to
visit friends and relations at the seaside when I was able to get away
from Saturday to Monday; and they were first-class passes too, so that
one could go by the fastest trains.
One evening in May I found that a lad, who had been brought in with a
broken leg, was peeling nicely all over, and we extracted a history that
_might_ have meant a slight attack of scarlet fever, but it was so
indefinite that the house surgeon did not believe it, and did not have
him moved at once; and two days later another small boy developed
scarlet fever, and then one of the nurses, and they began to talk about
closing the ward; then one day I had a raging headache, but did not
think anything of it, but when I went to bed (much to my disgust) I
found I had a brilliant rash; and the next day the doctor came along and
agreed in my diagnosis of scarlet fever, and offered to isolate me there
or send me to the London Fever Hospital (paying), but I thought I would
just as soon sample an ordinary M. A. B. Hospital, so I took my
departure in state in the fever ambulance, with a crowd of friends to
see me off--from a safe distance--at the door.
They made me very comfortable at the Fever Hospital, but I felt rather a
fraud, as I had the fever so very mildly that I was never ill at all: no
sore throat and no temperature after the first two days--in fact I
think they doubted whether I had ever had it at all, and it was very
slow work waiting to peel. Having at last accomplished this process, I
went back to the Hospital to clear up my rooms, as a larger ward was
going to be vacant soon, and Matron wanted me to have it after I had
taken a holiday.
So I had a good time at home in the best of the summer weather, and paid
a few visits, going down to the Isle of Wight and having some splendid
bathing and boating there; but it is strange how it takes it out of one
having scarlet fever, even when you have it as ridiculously mildly as I
did, and I had a good deal of trouble with swollen feet and other forms
of feebleness.
In July I attended a very pleasant function at Marlborough House, when
the Princess of Wales presented me with my certificate of membership of
the Royal National Pension Fund for Nurses, and I met many old friends
amongst the one thousand odd nurses who were there.
It was a scorching hot day, and there were some active non-commissioned
officers of the Scots Guards who had their work cut out in marshalling
the crowd of nurses for their march past; and we found it warm work
standing in the sun, as we were wearing indoor uniform, and our caps
were not much protection; but as soon as that was over we found plenty
of shade under the beautiful trees, and were provided with ices and
delicious plates of fruit and other refreshments.
I knew a member of the household, and she very kindly took me round some
of the royal apartments, and it was interesting to peep into the cool
dining-room, with the lunch ready laid for the royalties to partake of
as soon as they had dismissed us, but they stayed chatting with some of
the nurses for some time, and altogether we spent a very pleasant time
there.
As I was travelling home afterwards in an express train we were suddenly
pulled up with a tremendous jerk that threw us and our baggage about the
carriage, and when we had picked ourselves up and could look out of the
window, we discovered that our carriage was on fire. Fortunately a
signalman had noticed it, and telegraphed to the next signal-box to stop
the train; we all had to bundle out at a country siding, and the
carriage was taken off to be attended to by the men there, while we and
our baggage were packed into the rest of the train--which already seemed
quite full--and then we hurried on again; but if the signalman had not
noticed it, it might have been very unpleasant for us.
I went back to work early in August, and when I got to the Hospital the
doctor who generally looks after me was away. It never struck me that I
needed to see a doctor, and the Matron did not think to suggest it, so I
took over my new ward and began to get things into shape and to my
liking. It seemed to me that it was very hard work, but I just put it
down to the fact that the weather was very hot, and that I had been
slacking for so long; and I thought I must pull myself together; but in
about a fortnight the doctor returned, and next day he came to see me
and said I was not fit for work yet; so, much to my disgust, I was
bundled off for more rest.
Towards the end of September I again got into harness, worked for about
a fortnight, and then knocked up with acute neuritis in my head, with
herpes, &c. I _was_ cross, but the pain in my head was too bad for me to
worry about anything else. I was warded in a medical ward, given big
doses of morphia at pretty frequent intervals, and generally fussed
over, as I had the honour of being a "very interesting and unusual
case." When my head got better the pain started down my
legs--sciatica--so they kept me in bed for some time, and when I got up
I was rather a wreck, and they said I must go south; so once more I went
off to stay with some relations near Southampton, and it was the middle
of November before I eventually got back to work. Just fancy having to
take from May to November to get over scarlet fever and its effects,
especially when the fever lasted only about a couple of days. Of course
every one who came to see me after I got back, wanted to know how long I
had been at work, as they supposed I should be sent off duty for
something else before I had worked a fortnight!
While I was down near Southampton, I went once or twice to the docks to
see the first troops going off to South Africa. The men looked very fit
and trim in their new khaki suits, but they were very tight packed on
the troopships and liners. One day I saw the _Kildonan Castle_ off with
2400 men on board; crowds of people to see them off, and _such_ cheering
and singing of "Auld Lang Syne" and "God Save the Queen." Some of them
looked such boys to go out and rough it at the front, and it is sad to
think that they can't all come back--one wonders how many?
I wish I could go too. Opinions seem divided as to whether the war will
soon be over or not.
XXV
R.M.S. "TANTALLON CASTLE,"
_March 1900_.
I couldn't stand it any longer; all my friends were going off to the
front; and, though many people said the war would be over before they
landed, we kept hearing accounts of how bad the enteric was, and that
the nurses were being overworked, so I felt I must at least offer to
lend a hand.
I was afraid if I sent in my papers in the ordinary way I might get sent
to a home station to free some Army Sister to go out, and that would not
have suited me at all, so I thought I would go down to the War Office,
and see for myself if I could get sent to the front.
About the middle of January I boldly went down and asked to see the
Secretary of the Army Medical Department. I quite expected to be told I
could not do so without an appointment, but I think the orderly must
have thought I _had_ an appointment, for he showed me into a
waiting-room, and there a strange thing happened: there were several
people waiting, and amongst them a gentleman whose face I thought I
knew, but I could not remember where I had met him before. After a few
minutes he came up to me and said, "I think you are Miss L.?" and I said
I had been trying to think whether we had met before, and where? and
then he reminded me of how we had travelled down the Nile on the same
post boat in 1898, and had talked of South Africa then, as he knew of
my brother out there. Then he said, "But what do you want here?" and I
replied, "Like every one else, I want to get sent out to the Cape."
After he had meditated for a few minutes he said, "Well, I'm offering to
give them a field hospital of one hundred beds, and to run it for three
months at the Cape. If they accept it, will you go with it?" Of course I
said I would like a shot; and then he was sent for to see the Secretary,
and I waited and waited, and thought he must have forgotten all about
me; but at last an orderly came to say, "The Secretary wished to see
Miss ----," and the people who had been waiting longer than I had glared
at me, as I was escorted to the Secretary's room.
There I found my friend of the Nile still talking to the Secretary, and
the Secretary turned to me with a frown, and asked me what I meant by
coming down to the War Office without an appointment, instead of sending
for the application forms in the usual way? So I told him I did not
intend to apply in the usual way, and risk being sent to some home
station. I had too good a berth in England to give it up for that, but
that if I found they would give me a chance of service at the front I
would be glad to go and do what I could; that I knew South Africa, and
knew what to expect in the way of climate, and knew how to manage the
native servants, and so on.
Then he melted a little, and said, "Well, this gentleman has been most
liberal in offering us a complete hospital, which we are going to
accept, and he has asked for you to go with it, so if you will send in
your papers and testimonials in the usual way you will stand a very good
chance of success." Did you ever hear of such a piece of good luck? If
I had not gone down personally to the War Office, I should never have
met my friend of the Nile, and if I had even gone five minutes later I
should never have met him; and afterwards, if I had seen in the papers
about his giving a hospital, I should never have thought of applying to
go with it, as, when we met on the Nile, I barely knew his name, and
should never have connected him with the hospital.
I asked him the other day what made him give me this chance on the spur
of the moment, and he told me that he did not wish to leave the
appointment of the staff entirely to the Government, and he did not
personally know any fully-trained nurse whom he could ask, and he
thought if I had a quarter of the brains he knew my eldest brother to
possess I should be a good help to him.
I have had heaps of congratulations, as every one says that, though many
sisters and nurses have gone from our hospital, this is the best
appointment of any that has come our way.
I sat up most of that night filling up papers required by the War
Office, and copying out testimonials to send in with them; also writing
home, as I had not even told them I was applying to go.
For the next day or two my ward was very heavy with bad cases, and took
up most of my time and thoughts; but on the third day I was sent for,
and told I was not only accepted but had been appointed Lady
Superintendent, and was to select five sisters to go with me, and send
their names in for approval. They hoped we should sail in about three
weeks.
Then followed a very busy time; the authorities of my hospital were most
kind in being willing to let me go, but the fact that so many sisters
and nurses were leaving for the front was causing a great scarcity of
seniors, so I felt obliged to stay as long as I possibly could, only
going home for a long week-end to say good-bye.
There were shoals of letters (sent for me to deal with) of nurses and
others wishing to go with us. Some of them were amusing: one was from a
viscountess, another from a member of a theatrical troupe; a large
proportion of the applicants had had no training, but were "willing to
learn"; some offered to pay their own expenses if I would only act as
their chaperon--they seemed to think we were going out for a picnic.
However, there were plenty of applications from well and fully-trained
nurses, and the chief difficulty was to know which to leave out.
I had to attend at the War Office for an interview with the Selection
Committee. Princess Christian was one serving on this committee, and she
came and shook hands with me and was most kind.
All the sisters whose names I had sent in were duly appointed to the
Army Nursing Service Reserve; and then, having settled the staff, I had
to help in choosing the fittings and stores for the hospital, as they
wished to take out everything so as to be quite independent when we
landed wherever we might be sent.
Lengthy lists had to be made out of bowls and porringers, thermometers,
splints, crutches, charts and chart-cases, syringes, bedding and linen,
shirts, suits for convalescents, scrubbing and other brushes, tanks for
disinfecting linen, &c.
There are so many things that seem to come by nature in England which
it would be most trying to find oneself without on the other side.
And then there were the food supplies to be ordered: flour, sugar, all
groceries, invalid foods, &c.--in fact everything, and enough of
everything, to last for at least three months.
Having chosen all the fittings we could possibly think of, we found
great difficulty in getting room on board ship to despatch our cargo, as
men were being so urgently called for, and the ships were going out
packed with regiments and their baggage.
In the intervals of running a heavy surgical ward, selecting sisters,
and choosing stores, I had to get my uniform made and buy a suitable kit
for a hot climate; I also bought a second-hand saddle (which I knew
would be useful wherever we were stationed), and had it packed in a
tin-lined case, which took a good many other things inside the saddle,
and I thought if we were living in tents the case would be useful to
save some of my goods from the white ants.
The hours I could give to sleep were few in those weeks, but I shall
make up arrears on board ship.
We had various false alarms as to the date of sailing, all of which I
had to communicate to the sisters and then contradict!
I left the hospital on February 22nd with many regrets, after six years'
work, having been a Sister, or a Night Sister, or an Assistant Matron
there for the last five years.
We thought we were going to sail at once, but in the end it was decided
that the medical officers and the orderlies would have to leave a few
days before the sisters. I was sorry for this, as I had hoped to get to
know them a little on board ship.
Before they sailed, Mr. X., who was providing the hospital, gave a
dinner party to all the staff, and we had a most pleasant evening. After
the dinner there was a large reception, and I was introduced to many
people whose names are well known both in South Africa and in England.
The doctors sailed on February 28th, and on March 1st I was at the Army
and Navy Stores doing a little final shopping when the news came that
Ladysmith was relieved; the excitement was intense; such cheering and
waving of flags, and they set all the musical boxes, &c., to play "Rule
Britannia"!
Mr. X. had decided to go out with us to see the hospital erected, and on
March 3rd we sailed from Southampton on the R.M.S. _Tantallon Castle_.
We have troops on board, and I shall never forget the cheering the
people at Southampton gave us as we got away.
The first-class is full up with officers and some "gentlemen troopers"
of the Yeomanry.
We are now ploughing down the Channel with the sea so calm few people
can even think of being sea-sick, so I thought I would send you a yarn
up-to-date, and then you would understand that it has been impossible
for me to come to say good-bye.
Until we reach Cape Town, we don't know what our destination will be; in
the meantime I am having a good rest, and shall be quite fit for any
amount of work by the time we land.
I hope to post this at Madeira.
XXVI
DURBAN, NATAL,
_April 1, 1900_.
That was a strange voyage out on the _Tantallon Castle_. For one thing,
instead of the usual mixed lot of passengers, the boat was nearly full
of soldiers; there were very few ladies on board besides one Army
Superintendent Sister with a batch of sisters and my little party of
six, also a few wives of the senior officers; there were practically no
old people or children on board.
As one would expect, with so many young men on board (many of them mere
boys), there was a great deal of fun and joking, and yet beneath it all
there was an under-current of solemnity.
I think we all felt that it was not possible that we should all return
(before we left we heard how many were dying of enteric and dysentery),
and we hoped, if we were to be left behind, we should have a chance of
doing a bit before we got knocked over. Very few of the officers had
ever been under fire, and they felt it was going to be a very new
experience, and some of them talked of it with awe. I don't mean that
they were the least bit "funky," but they wondered whether they would be
certain to remember how to manage their men and lead them on as steadily
as if they were on parade; some of them thought they would be sure to
duck their heads when the bullets were flying, and it would "look so
jolly bad."