During this sojourn in America Dr. House was married on November
27, 1855, to Miss Harriet Maria Pettit, formerly of Waterford.
The marriage came as a surprise to most of his friends. He had so
frequently declared that he would never marry that his change of
mind came without warning. His missionary friends had frequently
twitted him on this subject, but in good part he defended his
position. Usually after these banterings he would enter in his
journal the reason why he chose to go out single and why he thought
best to remain unmarried.
His argument was that it would have been an imposition upon a
woman to have led her into a strange world, into a primitive state
of civilisation, afar from kin and friends. He persuaded himself
that the care of a wife, the anxiety for her safety and the
responsibility of rearing children would seriously interfere with
his one great purpose, an undivided attention to the propagation of
the Gospel. The Siamese, among whom polygamy was practised, could
not understand why this one missionary had no wife. Several of the
princes suggested that he take a Siamese woman in marriage, and one
nobleman even offered to provide a wife for him.
However, there are indications that his arguments were as much to
repress his own idea as to confute the bantering. During those
years he was a permanent guest at the family of the Mattoons. He
frequently expresses generous appreciation of sharing the home
comforts of his friends, and confesses that he did not know how he
could have gotten along without this domestic care of Mrs. Mattoon.
Thus while stoically denying the need of a wife he gratefully
accepts the ministrations of the wife of his colleague.
Then, after having married and having fully settled in a home of
his own, his real feelings assert themselves, for he writes, upon
return to Siam:
“And mine, too, is a pleasant home, the one to which four
weary months voyaging have brought me, a pleasanter home
than once—for it has a new inmate. Taking such a partner
into the concern is indeed a great addition to a bachelor
establishment.”
And a year later:
“You don’t know how nicely we are jogging on in the good old
road of domestic felicity. And when you hear me say at the
end of fourteen months that I am more fully than ever of the
opinion that I have as my companion in my journey the most
suitable one for me that could have been found had I tarried
seven months or seven years longer in the States, you will
allow that, at least, I am contented with my choice.”
He shows the reversal of mind on this subject complete when, in
1871, he writes:
“I must confess that I feel this wholesale sending out of
unmarried women into the field just now so in vogue in our
church is an experiment.... And I do not think much better
of the sending unmarried young men to some fields. ’Tis a
pity the secretaries of our Board who ought to know the
wisest way do not guide opinion on this subject and more
strongly impress upon candidates who apply to them the
desirableness of making their arrangements before they leave
home—not but what Providence may bless some favoured mortals
more than they deserve.”