Bregenz.
My dear Molly,--It 's well I ever got your last letter, for it seems
there's four places called Freyburg, and they tried the three wrong
ones first, and I believe they opened and read it everywhere it stopped.
"Much good may it do them," says I, "if they did!" They know at
least the price of wool in Kinnegad, and what boneens is bringing in
Ballinasloe, not to mention the news you tell of Betty Walsh! I thought
I cautioned you before not to write anything like a secret when the
letter came through a foreign post, seeing that the police reads
everything, and if there's a word against themselves, you're ordered
over the frontier in six hours. That's liberty, my dear! But that is
not the worst of it, for nobody wants the dirty spalpeens to read about
their private affairs, nor to know the secrets of their families. I must
say, you are very unguarded in this respect, and poor Betty's mishap is
now known to the Emperor of Prussia and the King of Sweden, just as well
as to Father Luke and the Coadjutor; and as they say that these courts
are always exchanging gossip with each other, it will be back in England
by the time this reaches you. Let it be a caution to you in future,
or, if you must allude to these events, do it in a way that can't be
understood, as you may remark they do in the newspapers. I wish you
would n't be tormenting me about coming home and living among my own
people, as you call it. Let them pay up the arrears first Molly, before
they think of establishing any claim of the kind on your humble servant.
But the fact is, my dear, the longer you live abroad, the more you like
it; and going back to the strict rules and habits of England, after it,
is for all the world like putting on a strait-waistcoat. If you only
heard foreigners the way they talk of us, and we all the while thinking
ourselves the very pink of the creation!
But of all the things they're most severe upon is Sunday. The manner
we pass the day, according to their notions, is downright barbarism.
No diversion of any kind, no dancing, no theatres; shops shut up, and
nothing legal but intoxication. I always tell them that the fault isn't
ours, that it's the Protestants that do these things; for, as Father
Maher says, "they 'd put a bit of crape over the blessed sun if they
could." But between ourselves, Molly, even we Catholics are greatly
behind the foreigners on all matters of civilization. It may be out of
fear of the others, but really we don't enjoy ourselves at all like the
French or the Germans. Even in the little place I'm writing now, there's
more amusement than in a big city at home; and if there's anything I 'm
convinced of at all, Molly, it's this: that there is no keeping people
out of great wickedness except by employing them in small sins; and, let
me tell you, there's not a political economist that ever I heard of has
hit upon the secret.
We are all in good health, and except that K. I. is in one of his
habitual moods of discontent and grumbling, there's not anything
particular the matter with us. Indeed, if it was n't for his natural
perverseness of disposition, he ought n't to be cross and disagreeable,
for dear James has just been appointed to an elegant situation, on what
they call the "Diplomatic Service." When the letter first came, I was
almost off in a faint. I did n't know where it might be they might be
sending the poor child,--perhaps to Great Carey-o, or the Hy-menoal
Mountains of India; but Lord George says that it's at one of the great
Courts of Europe he's sure to be; and, indeed, with his figure and
advantages, that's the very thing to suit him. He's a picture of a
young man, and the very image of poor Tom McCarthy, that was shot at
Bally-healey the year of the great frost. If he does n't make a great
match, I 'm surprised at it; and the young ladies must be mighty
different in their notions from what I remember them, besides. Getting
him ready and fitting him out has kept us here; for whenever there's a
call upon K. I.'s right-hand pocket, he buttons up the left at once; so
that, till James is fairly off, there 's no hope for us of getting away
from this. That once done, however, I'm determined to pass the winter in
Italy. As Lord George says, coming abroad and not crossing the Alps,
is like going to a dinner-party and getting up after the "roast,"--
"you have all the solids of the entertainment, but none of the light and
elegant trifles that aid digestion, and engage the imagination."'It's
a beautiful simile, Molly, and very true besides; for, after all,
the heart requires more than mere material enjoyments! You 're maybe
surprised to bear that Lord G. is back here; and so was I to see him.
What his intentions are, I 'm unable to say; but it's surely Mary Anne
at all events; and as she knows the world well, I 'm very easy in my
mind about her. As I told K. I. last night, "Abuse the Continent as you
like, K. I., waste all your bad words about the cookery and the morals
and the light wines and women, but there 's one thing you can't deny to
it,--there's no falling in love abroad,--that I maintain!" And when
you come to think of it, I believe that's the real evil of Ireland.
Everybody there falls in love, and the more surely when they haven't
a sixpence to marry on! All the young lawyers without briefs, all the
young doctors in dispensaries, every marching lieutenant living on his
pay, every young curate with seventy pounds a year,--in fact,
Molly, every case of hopeless poverty,--all what the newspapers call
heartrending distress,--is sure to have a sweetheart! When you think of
the misery that it brings on a single family, you may imagine the ruin
that it entails on a whole country. And I don't speak in ignorance, Mrs.
Gallagher; I 've lived to see the misery of even a tincture of love in
my own unfortunate fate. Not that indeed I ever went far in my feelings
towards K. I., but my youth and inexperience carried me away; and see
where they 've left me! Now that's an error nobody commits abroad; and
as to any one being married according to their inclination, it's quite
unheard of; and if they have less love, they have fewer disappointments,
and that same is something!
Talking of marriage brings me to Betty,--I suppose I mustn't say Betty
Cobb, now that she calls herself the Frau Taddy. Hasn't she made a nice
business of it! "They're fighting," as K. I. says, "like man and wife,
already!" The creature is only half human; and when he has gorged
himself with meat and drink, he sometimes sleeps for twenty-four, or
maybe thirty hours; and if there's not something ready for him when he
wakes up, his passion is dreadful. I 'm afraid of my life lest K. I.
should see the bill for his food, and told the landlord only to put down
his four regular meals, and that I 'd pay the rest, which I have managed
to do, up to this, by disposing of K. I.'s wearing-apparel. And would
you believe it that the beast has already eaten a brown surtout, two
waistcoats, and three pairs of kerseymere shorts and gaiters, not to say
a spencer that he had for his lunch, and a mackintosh cape that he took
the other night before going to bed! Betty is always crying from his bad
usage, and consequently of no earthly use to any one; but if a word is
said against him, she flies out in a rage, and there's no standing her
tongue!
Maybe, however, it's all for the best; for without a little excitement
to my nervous system, I 'd have found this place very dull. Dr. Morgan
Moore, that knew the M'Carthy constitution better than any one living,
used to say, "Miss Jemima requires movement and animation;" and, indeed,
I never knew any place agree with me like the "Sheds" of Clontarf.
Mary Anne keeps telling me that this is now quite vulgar, and that your
people of first fashion are never pleased with anybody or anything;
and whenever a place or a party or even an individual is peculiarly
tiresome, she says, "Be sure, then, that it's quite the mode." That is
possibly the reason why Lord George recommends us passing a few weeks
on the Lake of Comus; and if it's the right thing to do, I 'm ready and
willing; but I own to you, Molly, I 'd like a little sociality, if it
was only for a change. At any rate, Comus is in Italy; and if we once
get there, it will go far with me if I don't see the Pope. I 'm obliged
to be brief this time, for the post closes here whenever the postmaster
goes to dinner; and to-day I 'm told he dines early. I 'll write you,
however, a full and true account of us all next week, till when, believe
me your ever affectionate and attached friend,
Jemima Dodd.
P. S. Mary Anne has just reconciled me to the notion of Comus. It is
really the most aristocratic place in Europe, and she remarks that it
is exactly the spot to make excellent acquaintances in for the ensuing
winter; for you see, Molly, that is really what one requires in summer
and autumn, and the English that live much abroad study this point
greatly. But, indeed, there's a wonderful deal to be learned before one
can say that they know life on the Continent; and the more I think
of it, the less am I surprised at the mistakes and blunders of our
travelling countrymen,--errors, I am proud to say, that we have escaped
up to this.