“Lottie had been at the Bards Town School in Kentucky for four years;
but she usually spent the summer vacation at home. She graduated with
the highest honors, having won the first prize in Greek, Latin and
French, and triumphantly carried off the costly gold cup offered for the
best original poem. There were two things combined which contributed to
her success. In the first place, she possessed the active brain, and the
ambition; and in the second place, she had been trained and taught much
of the time by Mr. Rockland before she went to the Kentucky school. The
iron lawyer would often take her into his library and make her recite
lesson after lesson, when he would lecture her on the different branches
of her studies. Then he would stray away into ancient and modern
history, poetry and politics, spending hours in expounding them to the
mind that was so able and willing to grasp the meaning. He would often
make Lottie draw up bills in chancery--write pleas and declarations
under his direction. Then he would explain all the legal points in some
important case, and request her to look up the law and arrange his
brief. It was a remarkable fact that Mr. Rockland would neglect his best
paying clients in order to cram his solid ideas into Lottie’s grasping
mind.
“‘Ed, she will be home to-morrow,’ said Harry Wallingford as he ran his
hand under my arm and walked down the street by my side. ‘I have just
received a telegram from her; she left Bards Town this morning, and is
now in Louisville. Mr. Rockland is going to give a grand ball in honor
of her great triumph as the champion prize-taker at Bards Town. I
suppose you have heard about her wonderful victory?’
“‘Yes.’
“‘See here, old fellow, is that all you have to say in praise of this
wonderful sister of mine? What is the matter with you, anyway? You look
as if you wanted to murder somebody.’
“‘There is nothing wrong with me at all, and I am glad to hear of
Lottie’s grand achievements,’ I replied rather dryly, because I had
begun to discuss with my mind on the probabilities of losing Lottie. I
knew full well that many a gallant knight would be ready to leap into
the arena as a contestant for the charming prize--ready to battle to the
death to win the hand and heart of the most lovely, the most beautiful
and the most talented girl in Tennessee. When I weighed my chances well
I was forced to the conclusion that they were too light to go into the
balances against many other young men who I knew were going to enter the
lists. Lottie had always manifested a partiality for me, but I was
afraid that it was more a feeling of sisterly love than anything else.
During our childhood days we had often talked of the feelings of true
love which we had for each other; but Lottie was now a woman, and I did
not want her to love me as a brother. I had no money, and but little
education--was green and awkward, timid and ugly, and had no confidence
in myself; but I was determined to break many a lance before a rival
should carry off the great prize.
“Mr. Rockland was so deeply in love with Lottie that it amounted to
idolatry, and it was generally believed, and publicly expressed, that he
would settle his large fortune on her. He was extravagant in the
expenditure of money for her comfort; in fact, he poured it out like
water to gratify her slightest wish, though she was rather inclined to
be economical and prudent. She seemed to think more of her books and
music than she did of dress and display.
“‘Ed, old boy,’ exclaimed Wallingford, after a long pause, ‘did you know
that I was very proud of my sister?’
“‘Yes.’
“‘Ah, yes, I tell you what it is, she is ahead of any girl in Memphis,
so far as intelligence and goodness are concerned. Mrs. Rockland says
that she is going to set Lottie out when the ball comes off.’
“‘How set her out?’
“‘Pshaw! don’t you know what they mean by setting a girl out? Of course
you do. When a girl is ready to receive matrimonial propositions they
set her out; that is, they hang out the sign. As the gamblers say, they
spread their lay-out, don’t you see? Well, Mrs. Rockland is going to rig
Lottie up and throw her at the heads of the male community, as it were.
Now, Ed, let me tell you one thing: I mean to have something to say in
that little skirmish, and the man who marries my sister must be the
reliable sort. If any sap-head bumpkin begins to caper around Lottie,
I’ll just give him unlimited leave of absence; and if he don’t take it,
I’ll wring off his head.’
“‘Do you intend to marry her to a rich man; or shall she marry for
love?’
“‘Of course she shall marry the man of her choice, provided he is of the
right stamp. I don’t care about the length of his purse, but he must
have brains, and a heart of the right sort, and he must have an
established reputation for honor and integrity. If any man were to marry
my sister and be unkind to her, don’t you know I would kill him?’
“‘I should be inclined to do such a man some great bodily harm myself.’
“‘Thank you, Ed, I believe you would; and well you might, because, you
know, Lottie always loved you as a brother.’
“I felt my heart make a sudden leap and drive the blood to my cheeks
when he spoke of brotherly love. I wanted none of that sort. I felt
miserable, and was unable to conceal my feelings.
“‘By-by, old boy,’ said Wallingford, as he turned into the street that
led to his office. ‘You must call and see us when Lottie gets home.’
“I bowed stiffly, said nothing, and hurried on to my home by no means
satisfied with the prospects. ‘They are going to set her out, are they?’
I said mentally. ‘Good! I’ll be there when the show begins, and though
my chance is slim, yet I’ll die hard, if die I must.’ I made a draw on
Doctor Dodson for cash to pay for a first-class ball dress, and felt
profoundly thankful to my tailor for the skill he displayed in the
make-up. I did not call to see Lottie when she arrived, because I wanted
to appear at the ball in my splendid new costume, so as to take a fair
start in the matrimonial tilt I knew the other young men would make.
“Grand indeed were the preparations that were being made for the great
ball, and the young people who had been so fortunate as to receive an
invitation were looking forward impatiently to the eventful day; and no
one thought about it more anxiously than I did. I was very full of
apprehension and doubt in regard to Lottie’s feelings toward me, and I
propounded a thousand questions to my own mind about it. ‘Will she look
down from the high circle where fortune has placed her to the humble
sphere in which I am doomed to dwell? or will she forget the poor
awkward boy who, in the happy days of old, was glad to kiss the dust
that had felt the touch of her little feet? Why should she stoop so low
as to even think of me? What right have I, a poor half-educated clerk,
to expect such a brilliant, beautiful heiress to lavish her favors on
me, when men of wealth and high position are ready to lay their honors
and wealth at her feet? What right have I to aspire so high?’
‘None--none--none!’ was thundered in my ear by Common Sense, as the
answer to my mental questions. ‘Miss Charlotte Wallingford is not for
your sort,’ said Reason. ‘She is fit for the wife of a king!’ ‘Yes, but
I saved her life,’ said my Mind, ‘and she is under obligations to me.’
‘True enough,’ Reason replies, ‘but it does not follow that she must
marry you. Women’s lives are often saved by their servants, yet they do
not marry them.’ ‘But it will kill me if Miss Wallingford marries any
other man.’ ‘No matter if it does--why should she care? the world will
never feel the loss--the sun will shine as bright, the flowers grow as
sweet, and the seasons will come and go after you are dead just as they
did when you were alive.’ With such unpleasant reflections as these I
had managed to work my mind up to an unusual degree of excitement. I
became gloomy and unhappy to such an extent as to attract the attention
of my good mother (as I called Mrs. Dodson), and she begged me to tell
her the cause of my misery. I evaded her questions, and sought solitude,
where I could give vent to my sorrow unmolested. She cast many an
imploring look at me when I would leave my food untasted. My cheeks grew
pale and my appetite failed, and I hugged my misery to my breast, and
told my secret to none. I was proud, and felt offended, but had no
reasons to give for it. No one had been unkind to, or in any manner
maltreated me, yet I was querulous, melancholy and despairing.
“‘Ah, ha! here we come, my boy,’ said Doctor Dodson one morning as he
came into the store. ‘What’s the matter, what’s the matter, Ed, my boy?
speak it out, speak it out, let it come; what makes you look like a
ghost, my boy? Pshaw! don’t tell me such a tale as that, my boy, ah, ha!
don’t you do it, I say; indigestion! did you ever know a Russian bear to
have bad digestion? No, no, Ed, my boy, you needn’t try to fool me--you
can’t do it. The disease is in your mind, ah, ha! don’t you see? Yes,
yes, that’s what’s the matter. Something has gone wrong. I’d say it was
a love scrape, if it was any other boy; but my old booby has too much
sense for anything of that sort; ah, ha! don’t you see how it is, my
boy?’
“I soon became convinced that the good old doctor would pry the secret
out of me unless I resorted to falsehood, which I resolved not to do;
therefore I begged him to let me alone, promising to tell him everything
at the end of ten days.
“‘Ah, ha! very good, my boy; I won’t press you further just now, but I
mean to hold you down to your promise, don’t you see? I won’t let you go
to Philadelphia while you are looking like a defunct specimen of
humanity, ah, ha! don’t you see? You look more like a fit subject for a
grave-yard than a medical school, ah, ha! yes, that you do, my boy.
There now, go to work, and quit this moping about as if you wanted to
sneak into a tomb.’
“I was glad when the doctor was called to see one of his patients.
“At last the time for the grand ball arrived, and I had arranged my
toilet with unusual care. My good mother had been persuading me to send
my card to Miss Ella Willchester, a charming young lady residing just
across the street from our house, but it would have required the
strength of a forty horse-power engine to make me escort any other girl
to Lottie’s ball. I thought it would be treason to her if I offered any
favors to any other girl. The fact is, I could not think of anybody else
but Lottie; her image was floating before my eyes by day, and swimming
in my mind when I was asleep. I did not make my appearance at the ball
until after ten o’clock, for I wanted to slip in quietly, unobserved, in
order that I might see whether Lottie had even so much as thought about
me. I must acknowledge that I felt rather sheepish when I was going
round so as to come in at the side entrance, hoping to get in unnoticed.
The band commenced playing a lively waltz as I stepped on the veranda at
the end of the ball-room, and a dozen couples went whirling round and
floating gracefully through the hall. I took a seat on a chair near a
window, where I could peep between the folds of the rich lace curtains
and watch the movements of the guests within. I noticed a half dozen
young men crowd round a young lady whose back was toward me. They were
struggling with, and jostling each other, all apparently eager to get a
word with the young lady. Who was the fair one that attracted such
attention? was the question that came up in my mind. I could see the
tall, queen-like form, but could not get a view of her face. The square
shoulders and straight body, the beautiful arms and bright golden hair
were visible, but my mind was full of curiosity to know who she was. I
thought it might be Lottie, but then she was too tall--or at least I
concluded that after a moment’s reflection. It was Lottie, nevertheless,
and I had lost sight of the fact that it had been nearly a year since I
had seen her. She abruptly left the crowd of admirers.
“‘Excuse me a moment, please,’ I heard her say as she went to her
brother, who occupied a seat just inside the room, and within six feet
of where I was. ‘Brother, has Eddie come yet?’ I heard the question
distinctly.
“‘No; I don’t think he has,’ was the reply.
“‘I am afraid he is ill, else he would have been here long ago.’
“‘Pshaw! sister, never mind Ed; he isn’t the sort that gets sick.’
“‘Oh, I am so sorry he is not here!’
“I could bear it no longer; my heart was again in my throat, and I
thrust my hand in between the curtains, and said: ‘I did not expect you
would have time to spare a thought about me on such an occasion as
this.’
“She uttered a smothered scream, sprang through the door, and seized
both of my hands and began to jerk them up and down. Never had my eyes
beheld such a lovely object as the one then before me, such radiant
beauty, such lofty, dazzling charms, such large, liquid blue eyes and
bright golden hair, such round, pretty arms, such a tall, stately form!
Nothing could match this angelic creature! I was stunned--surprised, and
almost paralyzed, as I stood staring with open mouth at the wonderful
beauty before me. ‘Is this Lottie? Can this be the same little blue-eyed
thing who tramped so many miles by my side long, long ago?’ That was the
question that naturally forced itself on my mind. I could not realize
the fact that this radiant model of perfection and the little
sore-footed tramp were one and the same person.
“‘I am going to give you a real good scolding, Eddie,’ she said as she
still held both of my hands tightly clasped in hers. ‘Why have you not
come to see me before now; and what made you come so late to-night; and
what made you slip in here and hide as if you had been doing a mean
thing?’
“All I could do was to stand like an idiot, staring at the indescribable
beauty before me, unable to utter a word. I then and there concluded
that she never would be mine. No such woman could ever come down low
enough to be the wife of a half-educated pill-maker.
“‘What is the matter, Eddie?’ she exclaimed in an anxious tone, as she
cast a look of surprise at me. ‘You are ill--your hands are very cold,
and your face is as pale as death.’
“‘No, I am very well, I thank you,’ I managed with a struggle to say.
“‘You are trying to deceive me, but you cannot do it; you have been
ill?’
“‘Partners for a quadrille!’ exclaimed the leader of the band, and three
young men made a dash toward Lottie, each one claiming her as a partner.
She took the arm of Mr. Heartsell, after some little controversy as to
whose turn it was to dance with her, and soon was floating through the
waltz with him.
“‘By Jupiter! She is a stunner, ain’t she, Sam?’ exclaimed a dandyfied
youth as Heartsell led her away.
“‘Your head’s level, and don’t you forget it!’ replied the one
addressed, who was a little, hook-nosed law student with but a small
amount of brains and lots of brass.
“Wherever I went I could hear groups of young men lavishing their
extravagant praises on the wonderful young beauty who had so suddenly
blazed down among them like a newly discovered planet.
“As soon as Lottie was released from Heartsell she came back to me.
‘Eddie,’ said she, ‘I want you to enjoy yourself here to-night, and you
must let me introduce you to some of these charming young ladies. I
heard one expressing an anxiety to be introduced to that tall, handsome
young gentleman with the shaggy whiskers. I think she is smitten with
both you and your whiskers; come, let me introduce you!’
“‘No, you must excuse me--Lottie, I will not dance to-night, unless it
is with you.’
“‘Indeed, you do me great honor, and I’ll put you down for the third
set, as I am engaged for the next two, and would have been for every
other one but I declined the honor. You must excuse me now--I am acting
hostess to-night, as mother is not very well.’
“I waited for my turn with no small degree of impatience, as I sat like
a picture against the wall watching Lottie as she glided like a fairy
through the mazes of the dance. She was dressed in white satin, trimmed
with lace of the most exquisite and costly pattern, with close and
smooth-fitting body, which set off her round, straight form to great
advantage. A cluster of sparkling diamonds fastened both ends of a pearl
necklace which met on her bosom, while a large white rose was pinned at
her throat with a little golden arrow; and a broad band of gold
encircled each wrist, while a large amethyst set glittered from each one
of the bracelets. Her long, golden hair was coiled up in two plaited
rolls, and pinned on the back of her head with a pair of Cupid-darts set
in diamonds. I never had seen Lottie so exquisitely dressed before,
although she was always very particular and neat in her toilet. Mr.
Rockland had ordered her set of diamonds from New York especially for
that occasion.
“At last the time arrived when I was to waltz with her, and I would have
been glad to offer an excuse, because I was trembling like one in an
ague fit, and felt as if I were going to make a botch of it. I knew I
was clumsy, awkward, and a novice at the business, and just as I was
about to stammer out an excuse, the band struck up a lively waltz, and
Lottie seized me without ceremony and almost dragged me to the middle of
the floor. I imagined that the eyes of every one in the room were gazing
at me, and I was about half right, for my tall, gawky form loomed up
above all the other men, which attracted the attention of the
spectators. When we began to whirl round the room Lottie let her cheek
rest on my shoulder; and I felt her cool sweet breath fanning my face,
while her beautiful eyes gazed up into mine with an expression of
unmixed delight. I had not failed to notice how differently she acted
when waltzing with me from what she did with other men. Her fair cheek
had never touched another man’s shoulder on that night, and no one had
been able to keep her on the floor as long as I did. I soon became
warmed up, and my blood boiled with the intoxicating influence of the
music, and the love for the girl whose cheek rested on my shoulder. I
forgot everything but the dear idol who was so near my heart, and would
have kept whirling round until my limbs gave way under me, but the music
ceased, and I led Lottie to a seat; but I did not get a chance to enjoy
her company many moments before she was surrounded by a crowd of young
men, who insisted on leading her to the piano. The musicians had laid
down their instruments, and were enjoying a smoke on the veranda, and
Lottie was urged to sing. I drew as near as I could, and took my stand
on her left. She ran her fingers rapidly over the keys and then asked me
what she should sing.
“‘Give us something to remind us of olden times!’
“‘Very well, here is one of my own invention:
“‘In the happy days of yore
A hero loved me then.
Let my tears of sorrow pour,
My happy days are o’er,
For he loves me now no more--
He loved me truly then.
“‘Oh, what bliss it is to know
A hero loved me then!
His young heart was all aglow,
And as pure as driven snow;
I must let my hero go.
He loved me truly then.
“‘All the happy days are past--
A hero loved me then.
This poor heart is o’ercast
With sorrow’s consuming blast,
My hero broke it at last,
He loved me truly then.
“‘I remember every vow--
A hero loved me then.
It crowds my memory now,
For he kissed me on the brow,
Then he sweetly told me how
He loved me truly then.’
“Every time she lingered on the words ‘A hero loved me then,’ her eyes
were raised to mine for a moment and I thought I saw an appealing look
in them, and a glance of inquiry. When she came to the last three lines
her voice trembled slightly, and when she fixed her beautiful eyes on me
I saw that they were moist, though no tears fell from them. She repeated
the last three lines in a low, plaintive tone.
“For a few seconds after the last sweet sound had ceased not a word was
spoken. Lottie declined to sing any more, notwithstanding she was urged
to do so by the entire audience, but she rose from the piano and made
her way to me, and running her arm under mine, said:
“‘Come, Eddie, take me out where we can get a little fresh air--I am
smothering in here.’
“The proposition suited me admirably, for I was anxious to be alone with
her, and went out on the portico and began to walk up and down the
floor, while Lottie leaned on my arm, with her face turned up toward
mine. I was too happy to talk; my heart thrilled with delight, and I
remained silent. After making a few rounds on the portico without
speaking, we took seats on a low wooden bench, where a thick cluster of
honeysuckle vines formed a canopy that would conceal us from the prying
eyes of Mr. Heartsell and two other young men who were apparently
watching us.
“‘Now, Edward,’ said Lottie, ‘I want you to tell me what is the matter
with you? Come now, don’t try to deceive me, for you know you cannot do
it. I have not seen you smile to-night. You don’t look or act as you did
in the happy days of old. You were always cheerful and pleasant then,
but you look pale and serious now.’
“‘Lottie, I know I could not deceive you if I were to try; but I have no
wish to do anything of the sort. I am unhappy, but I do not know that I
could give any good reason for it. One thing, however, I will say, and
that is I think we shall never see any more such happy days as we have
spent together. I see a great gulf beginning to flow in between you and
me, which sooner or later will drive us apart forever!’
“‘Pshaw! Edward, you ought not to talk that way--it pains me deeply to
hear it. No gulf could be made wide enough to separate me from such a
dear, good, noble _brother_ as you have been to me; but what do you mean
when you speak of a gulf coming between us?’
“‘You have an accomplished education, a superior mind, as well as very
great beauty, and are to be a great heiress. Mr. Rockland is proud and
wealthy, and is very fond of you, he will expect you to marry some
distinguished man of his own choosing. I may be mistaken, but I don’t
think he would be pleased to have me as a frequent visitor at his house.
He did not speak to me to-night, but cast on me a cold, contemptuous
look, and bowed stiffly.’
“‘Now see here, Edward, in the first place, I think you are very much
mistaken in supposing Mr. Rockland dislikes you. He is naturally a very
stern, sad man, but he has a warm, tender heart, and I believe he loves
me dearly; but I tell you now plainly that the man who hates my dear,
noble brother must hate me too. And when it comes to the question of
matrimony, I guess I will have something to say about that. In the first
place, I do not want to marry at all, and in the next place, I shall be
very certain never to marry any man unless I love him with all my
heart!’
“While she was uttering the words just mentioned she made the heels of
her little boots clatter against the floor rapidly, and I could see by
the sparkle of her eyes that she meant what she said. I was partially
pleased, and partially vexed--pleased to hear her say that she never
would marry any man unless she loved him; vexed to hear her speak of her
love toward me as a dear _brother_--I wanted a different sort of love.
She now took the beautiful white rose from her throat and put it in the
button-hole of my coat, and while she was doing so her lovely face was
within three inches of mine, and I felt her cool breath gently touching
my cheek. When she finished the job, over which I thought she lingered a
long time, she gave me a gentle slap on the cheek and said:
“‘There, now, that is very nice; and I want you to drive away that ugly
frown from your brow, and go in and help me to entertain my guests. Will
you do it?’
“‘Yes, Lottie, you know I will do anything to please you; but stop a
moment--I want to know what you meant by composing such a song as the
one you sang a moment ago? Who is it that loved you truly then, and
loves you now no more?’
“‘Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no falsehoods, but I guess
you could answer that question better than I could. But come along
now--we must go in, for I heard some one inquiring for me; give me your
arm, and don’t forget the ugly frown.’
“‘Trust me now, Lottie, and I’ll be as polite to your guests as a French
dancing master.’
“‘Good enough, Edward! so come along.’
“We returned to the ball-room, when Mr. Heartsell came up to engage
Lottie as his partner for the next set.
“‘I beg you to excuse me, Mr. Heartsell--I am going to dance with Mr.
Demar in this set.’
“Now here was unmistakable evidence of partiality on Lottie’s part
toward me, for I had not asked her to dance with me; in fact, I had not
intended to dance any more that night.
“My self-conceit went up to a premium, my heart swelled with
indescribable delight, and I began to think that after all I was not to
be laid entirely on the shelf. I knew that Heartsell was going to be a
suitor for Lottie’s hand, and I considered him my most dangerous rival,
as I was aware of the fact that he was Mr. Rockland’s favorite. He bit
his lip with vexation as I led Lottie off to begin the waltz, while a
feeling of triumph swelled up in my bosom. When the waltz was ended,
Lottie parted from me as she whispered:
“‘Now, Eddie, remember my guests, and try to help to entertain them.’
“As she left me, Heartsell drew up in front of me, and stared at me for
a moment, while I thought that I perceived something like a sneer of
contempt play for a second on his face. ‘Hullo, Demar!’ he exclaimed,
‘where did you get that beautiful white rose?’
“‘That, sir, was fastened here by the prettiest girl in this room,’ I
replied, haughtily, as I drew myself up and walked away. I saw his
cheeks grow purple with anger as he went toward Lottie, who was talking
with a middle-aged lady near by.
“‘Miss Wallingford,’ he said as he bowed low before her, ‘will you honor
me with a short interview?’
“Without uttering a word, Lottie took his arm and was led out through a
side door which opened on the corridor. They came round on the outside
of the room and stopped within six feet of the seat where I was, and
immediately opposite a window, the sash of which was up, but the
curtains were down. I knew from the tone of Mr. Heartsell’s voice that
he was angry with Lottie about something.
“‘You seem to be enjoying yourself better than usual to-night.’
“‘Why should I not enjoy myself when I am among so many good kind
friends?’
“‘I am truly glad to see you enjoying the society of your very good
_friend_.’
“‘Why do you choose to use the singular number?’
“‘Because if you have any more than one friend (and I am happy to
believe you have), you have been very careful to avoid letting them know
that you recognized them.’
“‘Why, Mr. Heartsell, how can you be so unjust as to say that?’
“‘How many times have you danced with me to-night?’
“‘Once.’
“‘How many times with Mr. Campston?’
“‘I have not danced with him at all.’
“‘Did he ask you?’
“‘Yes.’
“‘How many sets have you danced with Demar?’
“‘Two.’
“‘“Now, in the name of all the gods at once, upon what meat doth
this our Cæsar feed that he is grown so great? Why, _man_, he doth
bestride the narrow world like a Colossus, and we petty men walk
under his huge legs and peep about to find ourselves dishonorable
graves.”’
“‘If your sarcasm is intended for Mr. Demar, I beg permission to say
that you might find a dishonorable grave without peeping about his legs
to find it.’
“‘Oh, I crave your pardon, Miss Wallingford, I assure you I meant no
offense; but candidly, I should be glad to know what Demar has done to
entitle him to such distinguished privileges? How is it that this great
Cæsar can monopolize the beauteous belle of the ball, while we petty men
must peep about among common people to find ourselves partners?’
“‘Mr. Heartsell, it is not agreeable for me to listen to wit of this
nature, because Mr. Demar has been to me a devoted friend, a true,
noble, unselfish brother. Look at that scar on my wrist, if you please.’
“‘Well, I see it; what about that?’
“‘That scar was made by the poisonous fangs of a rattlesnake, and I
would have died in ten minutes but that this generous, heroic brother
drew the poison from my veins with his lips, and came very near losing
his own life by the brave deed. Well may you compare him with Cæsar,
because, while you do it in jest, I will do it in earnest, for his
courage entitles him to all the honors that an inexperienced girl like
me can bestow. If it should be my pleasure to grant him more favors
than I do to other gentlemen, I trust I can do so without giving offense
to them.’
“‘Ah, Miss Wallingford, you are an eloquent orator, and if Cæsar did
have his friend Marcus Antonius to defend him, Demar has a more eloquent
defender in you. I envy him, and would make any sacrifice to win such
favors as fall to his share. I dare say you are quite lucky to have two
such brave, good brothers as Demar and Wallingford.’
“‘Indeed, I think so, and am happy in the thought, too.’
“‘By the by, Miss Wallingford, you have lost that beautiful white rose
that I saw on your throat a while ago.’
“‘You are mistaken, sir, I did not lose it.’
“‘Ah, indeed! I asked you to give it to me, and you refused; you
certainly did not present it to another gentleman?’
“‘And why should I not give it to whom I pleased; was it not mine?’
“‘Hem! yes, I cannot deny that, but such partiality as that would clip
an insult very close, and I am loth to believe such a charming lady as
Miss Wallingford would offer an indignity to one who loves and who
esteems her so highly as I do.’
“‘Now, Mr. Heartsell, I should be very unhappy if I thought I had given
you any just cause for offense, but in this instance I must say it
appears to me that you are manufacturing a mountain out of a mole-hill.
If you desire it, I will present you with a basketful of roses this
instant.’
“‘No, no; you shall do nothing of the sort. It was not the rose itself
that I cared for, but it was the emblem which would have come with it.
May I know who was the lucky donee?’
“‘Certainly you may, for I assure you there is no secret connected with
it. I had the _honor_ (she put the accent heavy on the honor) to present
the rose to my noble, heroic brother, Edward Demar.’
“Now we should never use extravagant language, and we should worship no
living being except God; but on that particular occasion I confess I
committed such a sin; though if the recording angel sets it down against
me, I believe he will credit me with a partial justification, at least.
How could I sit there and hear the most charming woman in America
boasting of the _honor_ she had done herself by presenting a rose to
me, and not feel an inclination to fall down and worship her? How could
I hear her dear voice sounding eloquently in praise of me, without
thinking extravagant thoughts? The fact is, I was so much excited that
they might have heard the loud throbbings of my heart, if they had
listened. I determined, however, to put an end to Mr. Heartsell’s little
_tete-a-tete_, because I knew it would please her. I went round on the
north side and passed across, coming up to where they stood, and coughed
as I approached, in order to notify Lottie of my arrival.
“‘Your friends will be curious to know what has become of their fair
hostess, Miss Wallingford,’ I observed, as I halted by her side.
“‘Ah, thank you, _brother_, for reminding me of my duty,’ she replied,
as she took my arm and bowed stiffly to Heartsell. ‘We will finish our
little quarrel at another time, sir.’
“‘No, no; the victory is yours, and I make an unconditional surrender.
Render unto Cæsar that which is his, but don’t crowd things on him that
don’t belong to him.’
“‘That fellow Heartsell is an impertinent scamp, and I mean to tell him
so.’
“‘If you do you will displease me beyond measure, for I think he is a
perfect gentleman; I am ashamed to say that I have treated him rather
unkindly to-night, and I mean to apologize as soon as I have an
opportunity.’
“‘Oh! very well, if you love him, you should let him know it by all
means!’
“‘See here, Edward, I must request you not to mention Mr. Heartsell’s
name in my presence any more to-night; and I will also ask you to excuse
me now, as I must really mingle among my guests, and give them some
attention.’
“Then she left me, and soon was surrounded by a crowd of young men. I
did not have a chance to talk with her any more that night, and when I
went home my mind was full of strange conjectures and conflicting
emotions. One question appeared to be pretty well settled, and that was
a perfect knowledge on my part that all my hopes of happiness would be
destroyed if Lottie should refuse to marry me. Love is a strange
passion, and no one knows how it can upset a man’s equanimity, unless he
has learned it by actual experience. It is a passion that produces
indescribable happiness to those who are loved in return, but of all the
distressing pains and horrible torture that mortal man ever felt, that
which he suffers when his mind is racked with doubt on that subject is
the greatest. I had resolved a hundred times to have that question
settled, but when in Lottie’s presence my tongue was paralyzed and my
brain refused to lay out a sensible idea. I had ordered a jeweler to
make an exquisite gold ring, with a beautiful diamond set, and had
Lottie’s and my name engraved on the inside. This I had carried in my
pocket for two weeks, intending to ask her to accept it as an engagement
ring, but for reasons already stated I failed to do it. I had written
out and memorized what I supposed to be an eloquent speech, which I
intended to deliver with the ring, but my courage oozed out the very
moment those large, beautiful blue eyes set their sight on me. Lottie
had a strange habit of looking me square in the face, which never failed
to set my limbs to trembling and my heart to thumping. I was considered
a privileged guest at Mr. Rockland’s house, not by him, but by Lottie,
and I visited there often, and was frequently so unlucky as to meet Mr.
Heartsell there, and sometimes other young men who had entered the
lists. I watched Lottie very closely, but I could not tell whether she
loved any one of her suitors or not. So far as I was able to judge, she
treated all alike.
“I spent at least three days of each week strolling about by Lottie’s
side, half crazy with love for her, sometimes buoyed up with hope, at
others struggling with suspense and despair. Summer was about to step
out, and autumn was ready to walk in. The weather was hot and dry, while
dust and heat hung about over all things. Vegetation was parched and
withered by the long drought, while gloom and dust combined to make me
very miserable, except when I was lingering with Lottie in her beautiful
flower garden, which, owing to her industry, was always delightful and
cool, for she had everything thoroughly watered every evening. The east
side of her garden was thickly shaded with young magnolias, whose broad
green leaves protected the thick velvety turf that covered the ground
beneath. The west side was set apart for flowers alone, and
notwithstanding the protracted drought that had prevailed, they looked
as fresh and vigorous as they did in May and June. Old Uncle Zack, as
Lottie called the old negro gardener, was always anxious to please his
pretty nightingale (a pet name he had given Lottie). During her
attendance at the Kentucky school, Uncle Zack had been the manager of
her garden and her birds, and on her return she found that the duty had
been faithfully performed. A charming summer-house stood near the east
boundary of the garden, all covered over with clustering vines and
blooming roses. It was at this delightful spot that I had spent so many
happy hours with Lottie. A large wooden table sat in the center of the
summer house, and low willow chairs were ranged around the sides, and
when the weather was fine the table was covered with books, maps, sheet
music, drawing materials, magazines and a guitar. Lottie called this her
study, for that was the delightful spot where she practiced music and
drawing and reviewed her studies generally.
“The time when I was to start to Philadelphia for the purpose of
attending the medical lectures was near at hand, and still I had not
been able to muster up the courage to make my love known to her. Doctor
Dodson was anxious for me to start immediately, because he was uneasy
about my health, which was on the decline, but he had no suspicions as
to the cause. He thought that a trip to the sea-coast would be
beneficial; then he had some business at New York and Boston which he
wanted me to transact for him. I could have told him that no journey
would restore my health. There was one thing, and only one, that could
ever bring health and happiness back to me. I knew that could I be
assured of Lottie’s love, all would be well with me; but if that was
denied, I never would know health or happiness any more.
“One sultry evening near the end of August, when the sun was about to
disappear in the West, after having scorched and burned the earth for
twelve consecutive hours, I found myself lingering in the summer-house
by Lottie, where I had been for a long time trying to collect the
necessary courage to tell her of my love.
“‘Sing one more song for me, Lottie, before I go, please,’ said I, as I
drew my chair closer to hers.
“‘What shall it be?’ she inquired, as she picked up her guitar and began
to run her fingers over the strings.
“‘I would like to hear the one you sang the night of the ball--I do not
know its name. It says something about a hero who loved you in the happy
days of old, who loves you now no more.’
“‘Oh, yes; I never will forget that song, for it is one of my favorites,
and my own composition. Do you like it, Edward?’
“‘I like to hear you sing it, but I do not think I like the sentiment,
for I am sure no one ever loved you in the days of old who does not love
you now.’
“I saw a crimson tinge steal over her cheeks, as her beautiful eyes were
for a moment fixed on me.
“‘A hero did love me, long ago, anyway, though I don’t know so well
about it now; but let that pass--we poor, foolish women should never
complain about anything.’
“She then began to tune the instrument, which was suspended by a broad
blue ribbon that passed over her left shoulder and was tied to a little
brass hook in each end of the guitar.
“Lottie’s voice seemed to be in excellent tune, and in all respects
under her control, though it was low and tremulous; and when she came to
the line that said, ‘He loves me now no more,’ she looked me full in the
face, and repeated the line in a pathetic tone that brought the tears to
my eyes. Every vein in my body was full of hot blood. When Lottie came
to the last three lines her voice sank to a mere whisper, and I could
see that some unusual emotion was at work in her bosom. She paused a
moment as the sweet echo of her voice gradually died away, and then she
turned round, and fixing her eyes upon me, repeated the last verse:
“‘I remember every vow--
A hero loved me then.
It crowds my memory now,
For he kissed me on the brow,
Then he sweetly told me how
He loved me truly then.’
“She laid the guitar down and turned her face another way, and as I
leaned forward slightly, I saw something like a drop of dew trembling
on her cheek. That little trembling tear settled my fate. An
unaccountable boldness came upon me, and all my timidity disappeared,
and I was rash, impetuous, and I might say rude, because I seized her
hand and pressed it to my lips a dozen times in rapid succession. My
impetuosity seemed to astonish and frighten her, and she began to move
away.
“‘It is time I was in the house, Edward,’ said she as she moved away;
‘mother will be calling me if I don’t go.’
“‘No, no, Lottie!’ I exclaimed as I moved toward her; ‘don’t go now;
remember I am going away next week, to stay a long, long time, and we
never may meet again. The fact of the business is, I think I never shall
come back to Memphis any more.’
“Her beautiful face grew a shade paler, but she soon regained composure:
‘Come along then, and let me show you my pretty birds,’ she said as she
moved toward a little latticed house that stood about fifty feet from
the summer-house. I imagined she was endeavoring to get my mind fixed on
other subjects than the one on which my thoughts were bent. I followed
her, and when we entered the cozy little house, the old parrot began to
laugh and chatter away.
“‘Lottie! Lottie! Lottie!’ he screamed, as he leaped down on her
shoulder. ‘Ah, ha! here we come. Lottie! Lottie! Lottie! ah, ha! here we
come!’
“‘How did he learn to imitate Doctor Dodson so perfectly?’ I asked.
“‘The doctor frequently comes to see me, and old Roderick has heard him
so often that he has caught his expressions.’
“A mocking-bird was singing in a cage that sat on the joist, and a dozen
canaries were making sweet music in their little silver-mounted houses,
while an old jackdaw was muttering to himself in a wire cage. Each bird
seemed to be making music for his own amusement, and on his own hook. It
was a combination of discordant sounds, which might have been good music
if they could have been induced to sing one at a time. It was a shrewd
maneuver of Lottie to decoy me to that place, for no man could talk loud
enough to be heard amid such an ear-splitting clatter as was made by
these birds.
“I concluded that she had resorted to this strategic maneuver in order
to avoid the disagreeable revelation which she had guessed I was about
to make. Then I became angry, and that increased my courage and made me
quite reckless, and I was determined to know my fate before I left. I
believed she could read my inmost thoughts, for I had never seen her
more embarrassed than she was then. The sun had entirely disappeared,
and a dark purple bank began to loom up in the East, indicating the
approach of twilight; while the face of the moon every now and then
peeped down through a column of white clouds that flew across the
horizon. As the dew began to dampen the flowers around us, a delicious
fragrance arose and filled all the air with its ravishing sweetness. I
took Lottie’s hand, and placing it under my arm, led her back to the
summer-house, and took a seat by her side. Old Bob came up and laid his
head on my knee and began to whine, and tried to wag his tail, but it
was too short. Notwithstanding the poor old dog was stone blind, it was
plain that he recognized me.
“‘Lottie,’ said I, ‘this faithful old friend remembers me, and I am glad
to know that there is one living thing in this cold world that cares for
me. I want you to take good care of him for my sake when I am gone, for
I guess I will not see him any more. I never shall forget those happy
days when we were poor, homeless tramps--penniless, friendless and
simple, but hopeful and cheerful.’
“Her face was turned away--her eyes were bent on the ground, and she was
busy plucking the tender leaves from a bunch of roses, and scattering
them at her feet. I knew from the rise and fall of her bosom that some
strong emotion was at work in her breast; but I thought it was caused by
an unwillingness to listen to my melancholy expressions.
“Taking her left hand, I enclosed it in both of mine, and after holding
it a moment, I ventured to raise it to my lips and stamp it with many
fervent kisses; then I pressed it over my loud throbbing heart, while
her face was still turned away from me.
“‘I wonder if any other man ever will press this little hand against his
heart, and call it his?’
“She instantly withdrew it with a sudden jerk, as if an insect had
stung her, and then fixing her expressive eyes on me with a reproachful
look, said:
“‘I declare, we must go to the house now; mother does not like to keep
tea waiting for any one.’
“‘She will excuse you when you inform her that I was making my farewell
visit; who knows that we ever shall meet again in this world?’
“Once more she turned her face away and gazed on the ground.
“‘Lottie, here is a beautiful diamond ring I want you to wear; it will
prevent you from entirely forgetting the one who has always loved you.’
“As I uttered those words in a trembling tone, I took her hand and
slipped the ring on her finger, which she did not resist, nor did she
give any signs of assent; in fact, she did not seem to notice what I was
saying or doing; but I could see that she was deeply moved with
excitement, as her body was trembling violently.
“‘Lottie, will you write me a letter occasionally when I am far away
from the one I love so dearly?’
“‘Yes, Edward, I will answer all your letters.’
“After I had placed the ring on her finger, I again pressed her
trembling hand against my heart.
“‘Lottie, it will be a long time ere we meet again, and I suppose you
will be married to some distinguished man before my return?’
“A gentle shake of the head, and a slight jerk of the hand, was her only
answer.
“‘Will you ever think of the boyish tramp who long ago claimed you as
his little wife, after I am gone?’
“‘Yes, Edward, I never shall forget the halcyon days of old, for
although we were poor, homeless wanderers, we were not unhappy.’
“‘Lottie, I loved that pretty little tramp devotedly then, and time has
increased that holy passion, until it has filled my heart, my mind, my
soul, my brain, my body, my thoughts, my dreams and my blood! Fortune
has not lavished her favors on me, but that is not my fault. I know I am
ignorant, green, poor and uneducated, doomed to occupy an humble sphere
in life, while the blind goddess has been more liberal in the bestowal
of her favors on you. Your beauty and your talent alone would have
placed you on a plane far above my lowly valley; but when it is known
that you are to be a great heiress, I feel as if it would be too
presumptuous on my part to ask you to be mine. I know that I have a
rough, ugly and awkward appearance--that I am not such a person as fine
ladies love to look on; but I possess a large, fond heart, that holds an
ocean of pure love for you. Lottie, why do you not say something; why do
you turn your face away from me? Have I offended you by my presumption?
If I have dared to talk of love to you, it does not necessarily follow
that you are bound to give a favorable answer; in fact, I have no right
to expect you to make such a one. If you cannot love me, say so, and I
promise never to annoy you any more with my suit, but will endeavor to
promote your happiness in every way I can. I profess to be a man of
honor, and believe I possess a remarkable amount of pride--too much to
annoy any lady about my love who cannot return my honorable passion.’
“Her body now began to tremble more violently than ever, shaking like a
leaf stirred by the storm, but she still remained silent, and kept her
face averted.
“‘Why do you not speak to me, Lottie? Am I to understand that the
refusal is caused by the scorn you feel for my presumption, or is it
because you hate to pronounce the doom which you know will consign me to
a life of misery? In the name of those happy days of old--in the name of
our dear, dead mother--in the name of the great ocean of love which this
poor heart holds for you, I implore you to speak to me now!’
“A tear then fell from my eyes, and dropped on her hand, which I still
held against my heart; that caused her to start up suddenly, and snatch
her hand away. Then she gazed down at the tear which still glistened on
her hand, and I saw another tear start from her left eye and roll slowly
down her cheek--it trembled on her chin a second, and then fell right on
the one that still sparkled on her hand. The two tears mingled into one,
and as they did so her head suddenly fell against my heart, and then I
knew that the great prize was mine. Looking up into my face with a gaze
of unutterable sweetness, while tears were streaming from her beautiful
eyes, she whispered:
“‘Eddie, I have always loved you more than language can express, or mind
can imagine, and I was sure you knew it all the time. I have never
thought of loving any one else; and I do not mean to allow you to
slander yourself any more in my presence as you have done here this
evening, for I think you noble-hearted, generous, intelligent and brave,
and I know you are very handsome!’
“I was too full of joy to speak; and the man who never kissed the lips
of a pure woman with a knowledge that her virtuous heart was all his
own, cannot understand the indescribable bliss that was mine.
“‘Edward,’ she whispered, while her large, liquid blue eyes were rooted
on me, ‘have you ever read “Romeo and Juliet?”’
“‘Yes, darling, very often; but why do you ask the question?’
“‘My love for you is like that which Juliet felt for Romeo. I gave you
my heart long, long ago, and if I had it back again then I would borrow
her sweet words which she employs in speaking to Romeo:
“‘But to be frank and give it thee again,
And yet I wish but for the thing I have.
My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep: the more I give to thee
The more I have: for both are infinite.’
“‘The sentiment is very sweet, and the language appropriate and
expressive, but I trust that our love will not end so sadly as did that
of Romeo and Juliet.’
“In the midst of my great joy I did not forget to return my sincere
thanks to the great Creator, for bestowing on me such a precious gem.
“‘Lottie, dear, I believe if you would try you could compose a sweet
song suited to this occasion, and I hope you will do so, and sing it
here every evening while I am far away. Make the effort, and I dare say
you will compose one with sentiments as sweet as ever poet wrote; then
fix an hour at which you will come to this very spot and sing it, and I
will at the same hour steal away and commune with you in spirit, while I
gaze on yonder bright star, and listen with my imagination to the sweet
music my darling is making here for me.’
“‘Edward, I promise to make the attempt, and if I succeed, I will sing
it here at this lovely spot every evening at precisely nine o’clock,
when the sky is cloudless; and I will think of you while singing it.’
“‘And will my darling promise to be mine when I return, thereby making
me the happiest man that ever walked on the earth?’
“‘If papa gives his consent, and if brother Harry is willing, and if you
do not fall in love with, and marry, some beauteous Philadelphia belle,
and if I do not die of loneliness while you are so far away from me, and
if you do not withdraw the proposition, and if, upon reflection, you are
willing to take me with all my imperfections, why, then, I reckon so.’
“‘Now there are a great many if’s contained in that answer, but let it
rain if’s until I return, and I will surmount them all. If my path was
sown thick with dragons’ teeth, and at every step producing armed men to
oppose me, I would march on to secure my great prize!’
“‘Edward, can you not postpone the time set for you to start to
Philadelphia for a few weeks?’
“‘Yes, and will gladly do so, for I must settle the question of the if’s
before I go. I must know Mr. Rockland’s mind, as well as Harry’s in
regard to our betrothal, before I leave Memphis.’”