Gud had traveled many infinite distances since he had seen any sign of
matter or mind or spirits. In this region things were not merely dead!
they were absolutely non-existent, and Gud became a trifle lonesome.
He was in his ghostly incognito, for he always traveled lightly in
vacuous and doubtful regions. To sojourn as an immaterial spirit among
material beings gives one a sense of power, for what could be more
glorious than to see without eyes, hear without ears, ring bells without
hands or kick over tables without feet? But it is a very dull business
to journey along as a spirit in absolute nothingness.
Indeed it is a business as dull as a Latin conjugation. So Gud now
realized that he was sensing something with his seventh sense, which was
more acute than the canine instinct of the Underdog and almost as
unerring as a woman's intuition.
This seventh sense told Gud that he had entered a spiritual realm, and
he became aware of a black ghost of a white cat with one ghoulish
unseeing eye, sitting on the shadow of a back fence echoing a diabolical
howl.
Gud could not hear the ghost cat howl, but he knew that it was howling
because with his seventh sense he felt the vibration of its howl
quivering through the impalpable and ghostly ether.
The howl of the ghost cat petrified Gud's gall, for he sensed that the
creature had nine notches on its tail; hence would never live again, and
had nothing to howl about.
So Gud picked up a stone and threw it at the ghost cat, but he aimed
high, and the stone, passing through a bush of credulity, killed two
birds of promise; whereupon the ghost cat ceased to howl.
As Gud went on he became aware of ghosts strolling about among the ruins
of nothing.
And Gud said to the ghosts: "Where is your king?"
And the ghosts replied to Gud: "We have no king."
"Then," said Gud, "I would be told of your form of government."
But the ghosts answered: "Our government has no form because we have no
government."
"Then," said Gud, "I would meet your doctors or lawyers or great and
famous ghosts."
And they made answer that they had none.
"Then," said Gud, "I would be told of your religion and learn of your
faith."
Said the ghosts: "We have no religion and no faith, for we are too
immaterial to sin; and are therefore without fear of death, and thus
need no religion and no faith."
"Then," said Gud, "this is a dull place. What do you call it?"
Replied the ghosts, who had a very long time to live: "We have no name
for the place, but we are very happy here."
When Gud learned that this place was nameless, he whistled for his
Underdog and they went on and passed through an impalpable fog of
etheric vibrations, and over a great gulf of sublimated emptiness, and
through a dark forest of neglected memories, and across a sandless
desert swept by a breathless wind.