CHAPTER VIII. ~ THE BEGINNING OF THE ENDING.

IT was some time before Griffith recovered from the effects of this

simple announcement of Mollie's.

Though he scarcely confessed as much to himself, he thought of it

very much oftener than was conducive to his own peace of mind, and

in thinking of it he found it assuming a greater importance and

significance than he had at first recognized in it, and was influenced

accordingly. He went home to his lodgings, depressed and heavy of

spirit; in fact, he left Bloomsbury Place earlier than usual, because he

longed to be alone. He could think of nothing but Dolly,--Dolly in the

white merino, shining like a stray star among her employer's guests, and

gladdening the eyes of Ralph Gowan. He knew so well how she would

look, and how this fellow would follow her in his easy fashion, without

rendering himself noticeable, and manage to be near her through the

evening and hold his place as if he had a right to it, and he knew, too,

how natural it would be for Dolly's eyes to light up in her pleasure

at being saved from boredom, and how her innocent gladness would show

itself in a score of pretty ways. And it was as Mollie said,--it was for

Dolly's sake that Ralph Gowan was there to-night.

“She must know that it is so herself,” he groaned, dropping his head

upon the table; “but she cannot help it. She would if she could. Yes,

I 'll believe that. She could never be false to me. I must hold fast to

that in spite of everything. I should go mad if I did n't. I could never

lose you, Dolly,--I could never lose you!”

But he groaned again the next moment from the bottom of his desperate

heart. He had become tangled in yet another web of misery.

“It is only another proof of what I have said a thousand times,” he

cried out. “My claim upon her is so weak, that this fellow does not

think it worth regarding. He thinks it may be set aside,--they all

think it may be set aside. I should not wonder,” clenching his hand and

speaking through his teeth,--“I should not wonder if he has laughed

many a time at his fancy of how it will end, and how easy it will be to

thrust the old love to the wall!”

At this moment, in the first rankling sting of humiliation and despair,

he could almost have struck a murderous blow at the man whom fortune

had set on such a pinnacle of pride and insolence, as it seemed to his

galled fancy. He was not in the mood to be either just or generous, and

he saw in Ralph Gowan nothing but a man who had both the power and will

to rival him, and rob him of peace and hope forever. If Dolly had been

with him, in all probability his wretchedness would have evaporated in a

harmless outburst, which would have touched the girl's heart so tenderly

that she would have withheld nothing of love and consolation which could

reassure him, and so in the end the tempest would have left no wound

behind. But as it was left to himself and his imaginings, every thought

held its bitter sting. He was, as it were, upon the brink of an abyss.

And while this danger was threatening her, Dolly was setting herself

steadfastly to her task of entertaining her employer's guests, though

it must be confessed that she found it necessary to summon all her

energies. She was thinking of Griffith, but not as Griffith was thinking

of her. She was picturing him looking desolate among the group round

the fire at Bloomsbury Place, or else working desperately and with

unnecessary energy amidst the dust and gloom of the dimly lighted

office; and the result was that her spirit almost failed. It was quite

a relief to encounter Ralph Gowan, as she did, on entering the room: he

had seen them all latterly, and could enter into particulars; and so,

in her pleasure, it must be owned that her face brightened, just as

Griffith had fancied it would, when she shook hands with him.

“I did not hear that you were coming,” she said. “How glad I am!”

which was the most dangerous speech she could have made under

the circumstances, since it was purely on her account that he had

diplomatized to obtain the invitation.

He did not find it easy to release her hand all at once, and certainly

he lighted up also.

“Will you let me tell you that it was not Miss MacDowlas who brought me

here?” he said, in a low voice; “though I appreciate her kindness, as a

grateful man ought. Vagabondia is desolate without you.”

She tried to laugh, but could not; her attempt broke off in the

unconscious sigh, which always touched him, he scarcely knew why.

“Is it?” she said, looking up at him without a bit of the old

brightness. “Don't tell them, Mr. Gowan, but the fact is I am desolate

without it. I want to go home.”

He felt his heart leap suddenly, and before he could check himself he

spoke.

“I wish--I _wish_,” he said, “that you would let me take you home.” And

the simply sounding words embodied a great deal more of tender fancy

than a careless observer would have imagined; and Dolly, recognizing the

thrill in his voice, was half startled.

But she shook her head, and managed to smile.

“That is not wisdom,” she said. “It savors of the lilies of the field.

We cannot quarrel with our bread and butter for sentiment's sake

in Vagabondia. Did you know that Mollie had paid me a visit this

evening?--or perhaps you saw her; I think she went out as you came in.”

“Mollie!” he said, surprisedly; and then looking half annoyed, or at

least a trifle disturbed, he added, as if a sudden thought had occurred

to him, “then it was Mollie, Chandos spoke of.”

“Chandos!” echoed Dolly. “Who is Chandos--and what did Chandos say about

Mollie?”

He glanced across the room to where a tall, handsome man was bending

over a fussy little woman in pink.

“That is Chandos,” he said; “and since you spoke of Mollie's visit, I

recollect that, as we came into the house, Chandos was behind me and

lingered a moment or so, and when he came to me afterward he asked if

I had seen the face that passed us as we entered. It had roused his

enthusiasm as far as it can be roused by anything.”

“It must have been Mollie,” commented Dolly, and she looked at the man

on the opposite side of the room, uneasily. “Is he a friend of yours?”

she asked, after scrutinizing him for a few seconds.

Gowan shrugged his shoulders.'

“Not a friend,” he answered, dryly. “An acquaintance. We have not much

in common.”

“I am glad to hear it,” was Dolly's return. “I don't like Chandos.”

She could not have explained why she did not like him, but certainly she

was vaguely repelled and could not help hoping that he would never see

Mollie again. He was just the man to be dangerous to Mollie; handsome,

polished, ready of speech and perfect in manner, he was the sort of man

to dazzle and flatter any ignorant, believing child.

“Oh!” she exclaimed, half aloud, “I could not bear to think that he

would see her again.”

She uttered the words quite involuntarily, but Gowan heard them, and

looked at her in some surprise, and so awakened her from her reverie.

“Are you speaking of Mollie?” he asked.

“Yes,” she answered, candidly, “though I did not mean to speak aloud.

My thoughts were only a mental echo of the remark I made a moment

ago,--that I don't like Chandos. I do not like him at all, even at this

distance, and I cannot resist feeling that I do not want him to see

anything more of Mollie. We are not very discreet, we Vagabonds, but we

must learn wisdom enough to shield Mollie.” And she sighed again.

“I understand that,” he said, almost tenderly, so sympathetically, in

fact, that she turned toward him as if moved by a sudden impulse.

“I have sometimes thought since I came here,” she said, “that perhaps

_you_ might help me a little, if you would. She is so pretty, you see,

and so young, and, through knowing so little of the world and longing to

know so much, in a childish, half-dazzled way, is so innocently wilful

that she would succumb to a novel influence more readily than to an

old one. So I have thought once or twice of asking you to watch her a

little, and guard her if--if you should ever see her in danger.”

“I can promise to do that much, at least,” he returned, smiling.

She held out her hand impetuously, just as she would have held it out

to Griffith, and, oh, the hazard of it,--the hazard of so throwing aside

her mock airs and graces, and showing herself to him just as she showed

herself to the man she loved,--the Dolly whose heart was on her lips and

whose soul was in her eyes.

“Then we will make a 'paction' of it,” she said. “You will help me to

take care of her.”

“For your sake,” he said, “there are few things I would not do.”

So from that time forward he fell into the habit of regarding

unsuspecting Mollie as his own special charge. He was so faithful to

his agreement, indeed, that once or twice Griffith was almost ready to

console himself with the thought that perhaps, after all, the child's

beauty and tractability would win its way, and Gowan would find himself

seriously touched at heart. Just now he could see that his manner was

scarcely that of a lover, but there most assuredly was a probability

that it might alter and become more warm and less friendly and platonic.

As to Mollie herself, she was growing a trifle incomprehensible; she

paid more attention to her lovely hair than she had been in the habit

of doing, and was even known to mend her gloves; she began to be more

conscious of the dignity of her seventeen years. She complained less

petulantly of the attentions of Phil's friends, and accepted them with

a better grace. The wise one even observed that she tolerated Brown,

the obnoxious, and permitted him to admire her--at a distance. In her

intercourse with Gowan she was capricious and had her moods. Sometimes

she indulged in the weakness of tiring herself in all her small bravery

when he was coming, and presented herself in the parlor beauteous and

flushed and conscious, and was so delectably shy and sweet that she

betrayed him into numerous trifling follies not at all consistent with

his high position of mentor; and then, again, she was obstinate, rather

incomprehensible, and did not adorn herself at all, and, indeed, was

hard enough to manage.

“You are growing very queer, Mollie,” said Miss Aimée, wonderingly.

To which sage remark Mollie retorted with a tremulous, sensitive flush,

and most unnecessary warmth of manner.

“I 'm not queer at all I wish you would n't bother so, Aimée!”

That very afternoon she came into the room with a card in her hand,

after going out to answer a summons at the door-bell.

“Phil,” she said, “a gentleman wants you. Chandos, the card says.”

“Chandos!” read Phil, rising from the comfort of his couch, and taking

his pipe out of his mouth. “Who knows Chandos?--I don't. It must be some

fellow on business.”

And so it proved. He found the gentleman awaiting him in the next

room, and in a very short time learned his errand. Chandos introduced

himself--Gerald Chandos, of The Pools, Bedfordshire, who, hearing of Mr.

Crewe through numerous friends, not specified, and having a fancy--quite

the fancy of an uncultured amateur, modestly--for pictures and an

absorbing passion for art in all its forms, had taken the liberty of

calling, etc. It was very smoothly said, and Chandos, of The Pools,

being an imposing patrician sort of individual, and free from all

fopperies or affectations, Phil met his advances complacently enough.

It was no unusual thing for an occasional patron to drop in after this

manner. He had no fault to find with a man who, having the good fortune

to possess money, had the good taste to know how to spend it. So he

made friends with Chandos, pretty much as he had made friends with

Gowan,--pretty much as he would have made friends with any other

sufficiently amiable and well-bred visitor to his modest studio. He

showed him his pictures, and talked art to him, and managed to spend an

hour very pleasantly, ending by selling him a couple of tiny spirited

sketches, which had taken his fancy. It was when he was taking

down these sketches from the wall that he heard a sort of smothered

exclamation from the man, who stood a few feet apart from him, and,

turning to see what it meant, he saw that he had just discovered the

fresh, lovely, black-hooded head, with the trail of autumn leaves

clinging to the loose trail of hair,--the picture for which Mollie

had sat as model. It was very evident that Chandos, of The Pools, was

admiring it.

“Ah!” said he, the next minute. “I know this face. There can scarcely be

two faces like it.”

Phil left his sketches and came to him, the pleasure he felt on the

success of his creation warming him up. This picture, with Mollie's face

and head, was a great favorite of his.

“Yes,” he said, standing opposite to it, with his hands in his pockets,

and critical appreciation in his eyes. “You could not very well mistake

it. Heads are not my exact forte, you know; but that is Mollie to a tint

and a curve, and I am rather proud of it.”

Chandos regarded it steadfastly.

“And well you may be,” he answered. “Your sister, I believe?”

“Mollie!” exclaimed Phil, stepping a trifle aside, to get into a better

light, and speaking almost abstractedly. “Oh, yes, to be sure! She is my

sister,--the youngest. There are three of them. That flesh tint is one

of the best points.”

And in the meantime, while this apparently trivial conversation was

being carried on in the studio, Mollie, in the parlor, had settled

herself upon a stool close to the fire, and, resting her chin on her

hand and her elbow on her knee, was looking reflective.

“That Chandos is somebody new,” 'Toinette remarked. “I hope he has come

to buy something. I want some gold sleeve-loops for Tod. I saw some

beauties the other day, when I was out.”

“But you could n't afford them if Phil sold two pictures instead of

one,” said Aimée. “There are so many other useful things you need.”

“He is n't a stranger to me,” put in Mollie, suddenly. “I have seen him

before.”

“Who?” said 'Toinette. She was thinking more of Tod's gold sleeve-loops

than of anything else.

“This Mr. Chandos,” answered Mollie, without looking up from the fire.

“I saw him at Brabazon Lodge the night I went to take Dolly her dress.

He was with Mr. Gowan, and I dropped my glove, and he picked it up for

me. I was coming out as they were going in.”

“I wonder,” said Aimée, “whether Mr. Gowan goes to Brabazon Lodge

often?”

“I don't know, I 'm sure,” answered Mollie, shrugging her shoulder.

“How is one to learn? He would n't be likely to tell us. I should think,

though, that he does. He is too fond of Dolly”--with a slight choke in

her voice--“to stay away, if he can help it.”

“It's queer,” commented 'Toinette, “how men like Dolly. She is n't a

beauty, I 'm sure; and for the matter of that, when her hair is n't done

up right, she is n't even pretty.”

“It isn't queer, at all,” said Mollie, rather crossly; “it's her way.

She can make such a deal out of nothing, and she does n't stand at

trouble when she wants to _make_ people like her. _She_ says any one can

do it, and it is only a question of patience; but I don't believe her.

See how frantic Griffith is about her. He is more desperately in love

with her to-day than he was at the very first, seven years ago.”

“And she cares more for him, I'm sure,” said Aimée.

Mollie's shoulder went up again. “She flirts with people enough, if she

does,” she commented.

“Ah!” returned Aimée, “that is 'her way,' as you call it, again.

Somehow, it seems as if she can't help it. It is as natural to her as

the color of her hair and eyes. She can't help doing odd things and

making speeches that rouse people and tempt them into liking her. She

has done such things all her life, and sometimes I think she will do

them even when she is an old woman; though, of course, she will do them

in a different way. Dolly would n't be Dolly without her whimsicalness,

any more than Dick there, in his cage, would be a canary if he did n't

twitter and sing.”

“Does she ever do such things to women?” asked Miss Mollie, shrewdly.

She seemed to be in a singular mood this afternoon.

“Yes,” Aimée protested, “she does; and what is more, she is not

different even with children. I have seen her take just as much trouble

to please Phemie and the little Bilberrys as she would take to please

Griffith or--or Mr. Gowan. And see how fond they were of her. If she had

cared for nothing but masculine admiration, do you think Phemie would

have adored her as she did, and those dull children would have been so

desolate when she left them? No, I tell you. Dolly's weakness--and

it isn't such a very terrible weakness, after all--lies in wanting

_everybody_ to like her,--men, women, and children; yes, down to babies

and dogs and cats. And see here, Mollie, ain't we rather fond of her

ourselves?”

“Yes,” owned Mollie, staring at the fire, “we are. Fond enough.”

“And is n't she rather fond of us?”

“Yes, she is--for the matter of that,” acquiesced Mollie.

“Yes,” began 'Toinette, and then, the sound of footsteps upon the

staircase interrupting her, she broke off abruptly to listen. “It is

Phil's visitor,” she said.

Mollie got up from her seat, roused into a lazy sort of interest.

“I am going to look at him,” she said, and went to the window.

The next minute she drew back, blushing.

“He saw me,” she said. “I did n't think he could, if I stood here in the

corner.”

But he had; and more than that, in his admiration of her dimples and

round fire-flushed cheeks, had smiled into her face, openly and without

stint, as he passed.

After tea Gowan came in. Mollie opened the door for him; and Mollie, in

a soft blue dress, and with her hair dressed to a marvel, was a vision

to have touched any man's fancy. She was in one of her sweet acquiescent

moods, too, having recovered herself since the afternoon; and when she

led him into the parlor, she blushed without any reason whatever, as

usual, and as a consequence looked enchanting.

“Phil has gone out,” she said. “'Toinette is putting Tod to bed, and

Aimée is helping her; so there is no one here but me.”

Gowan sat down--in Dolly's favorite chair.

“You are quite enough,” he said; “quite enough--for me.”

She turned away, making a transparent little pretence of requiring a

hand-screen from the mantelpiece, and, having got it, she too sat down,

and fell to examining a wretched little daub of a picture upon it most

minutely.

“This is very badly done,” she observed, irrelevantly. “Dolly did it,

and made it up elaborately into this screen because it was such a sight.

It is just like Dolly, to make fun and joke at her own mistakes. She has

n't a particle of talent for drawing. She did this once when Griffith

thought he was going to get into something that would bring him money

enough to allow of their being married. She made a whole lot of little

mats and things to put in their house when they got it, but Griffith did

n't get the position, so they had to settle down again.”

“Good Heavens!” ejaculated Gowan.

“What is the matter?” she asked.

He moved a trifle uneasily in his chair. He had not meant to speak

aloud.

“An unintentional outburst, Mollie,” he said. “A cheerful state of

affairs, that.”

“What state of affairs?” she inquired. “Oh, you mean Dolly's engagement.

Well, of course, it _has_ been a long one; but then, you see, they like

each other very much. Aimée was only saying this afternoon that they

cared for each other more now than they did at first.”

“Do they?” said Gowan, and for the time being lapsed into silence.

“It's a cross-grained sort of fortune that seems to control us in this

world, Mollie,” he said, at length.

Mollie stared at the poor little daub on her hand-screen and met his

philosophy indifferently enough.

“_You_ ought n't to say so,” she answered. “And I don't know anything

about it.”

He laughed--quite savagely for so amiable a young man.

“I!” he repeated. “I ought not to say so, ought n't I? I think I ought.

It _is_ a cross-grained fortune, Mollie. We are always falling in love

with people who do not care for us, or with people who care for some one

else, or with people who are too poor to marry us, or--”

“Speak for yourself,” said Mollie, with a vigor quite wonderful and new

in her. “_I_ am not.”

And she held her screen up between her face and his, so that he could

not see her. She could have burst into a passionate gush of tears. It

was Dolly he was thinking about,--it was Dolly who had the power to make

him unhappy and sardonic,--always Dolly.

“Then you are a wise child, Mollie,” he said. “But you are a very young

child yet,--only seventeen, is n't it? Well, it may all come in good

time.”

“It will not come at all,” she asserted, stubbornly.

Dolly's little wretch of a hand-screen was quite trembling in her hand,

it made her so desperate to feel, as she did, that she was of such small

consequence to him that he could treat her as a child, and make a sort

of joke of his confidence. But he did not see it.

“Ah! well, you see,” he went on, “I thought so once, but it has come to

me nevertheless. The fact is, I am crying for the moon, Mollie, as many

a wiser and better man has done before me.”

She did not answer, so he rose and walked once or twice across the room.

When he came back to the fire, she had risen too, and was standing up,

biting the edge of her screen, all flushed, and with a brightness in

her eyes he did not understand. Poor little soul! she was suffering very

sharply in her childish way.

He laid a hand on either of her shoulders, and spoke to her gently

enough.

“Mollie,” he said, “let us sit down together and condole with each

other. You are not in a good humor to-night, something has rasped

you again; and as for me, I am about as miserable, my dear, as it is

possible for a man with a few thousand a year to be.”

She tried to answer him steadily, and, finding she could not, rushed

into novel subterfuge. Subterfuge was a novelty to Mollie.

“Yes,” she said, lifting the most beauteous of tear-wet eyes to his

quite eagerly. “Yes, I am crossed, and--and something has vexed me. I am

getting bad-tempered, I think. Suppose we do sit down.”

And then when they did sit down--she on the hearth-rug at his feet, he

in Dolly's chair again--she broke out upon him in a voice like a sharp

little sob.

“I know what _you_ are miserable about,” she said. “You are miserable

about Dolly.”

They had never spoken about the matter openly before, though he had

always felt that if he could speak openly to any one, he could to this

charming charge of his. Such is the keenness of masculine penetration.

And now he felt almost relieved already. The natural craving for

sympathy of some kind or other was to satisfy itself through the medium

of pretty, much-tried Mollie.

“Yes,” he answered, half desperately, half reluctantly. “Dolly is the

moon I am crying for,--or rather, as I might put it more poetically,

'the bright particular star.' What a good little thing you are to guess

at it so soon!”

“It did n't need much guessing at,” she said, curving her innocent mouth

in a piteous effort to smile.

He, leaning against the round, padded back of his chair, sighed, and as

he sighed almost forgot the poor child altogether, even while she spoke

to him. Having all things else, he must still cry for this one other

gift, and really he felt very dolorous.

Mollie, pulling her screen to pieces, looked at him with a heavy yet

adoring heart. She was young enough to be greatly moved by his physical

beauty, and just now she could not turn away from him. His long-limbed,

slender figure (which, while still graceful and lithe enough, was _not_

a model of perfection, as she fondly imagined), his pale, dark face,

his dark eyes, even his rather impolite and uncomplimentary abstraction,

held fascination for her. Not having been greatly smiled upon by

fortune, she had fallen to longing eagerly and fearfully for this one

gift which had been so freely vouchsafed to Dolly, who had neither asked

nor cared for it. Surely there was some cross-grained fate at work.

She was very quiet indeed when he at length recollected himself and

roused from his reverie. He looked up to find her resting her warm,

rose-leaf colored cheek on her hand, and concentrating all her attention

upon the fire again. She was not inclined to talk when he spoke to her,

and indeed had so far shrunk within herself that he found it necessary

to exert his powers to their utmost before he could move her to anything

like interest in their usual topics of conversation. In fact, her

reserve entailed the necessity of a little hazardous warmth of manner

being exhibited on his part, and in the end a few more dangerous,

though half-jocular, speeches were made, and in spite of the temporary

dissatisfaction of his previous mood, he felt a trifle reluctant to

leave the fire and the sweet, unwise face when the time came to go.

“Good-night,” he said to her, a few minutes before he went out. And

then, noticing for the twentieth time how becoming the soft blue of

her dress was and how picturesque she was herself even in the

unconsciousness of her posture, he was tempted to try to bring that

little, half-resentful glow into her upraised eyes again.

“I have often heard your sister make indiscreetly amiable speeches to

you, Mollie,” he said. “Did she ever tell you that you ought to have

been born a sultana?”

She shook her head and pouted a little.

“I should n't like to be a sultana,” she said.

“What!” he exclaimed. “Not a sultana in spangled slippers and gorgeous

robes!”

“No,” she answered, with a spice of Dolly in her speech. “The slippers

are great flat things that turn up at the toes, and the sultan might buy

me for so much a pound, and--and I care for other things besides dress.”

“Nevertheless,” he returned, “you would have made a dazzling sultana.”

Then he went away and left her, and she sat down upon her stool before

the fire again and began to pull her hair down and let it hang in grand

disorder about her shoulders and over her face.

“If I am so--so pretty,” she said slowly, to herself, “people ought to

like me, and,” sagaciously, “I must be pretty or he would not say so.”

And when she went to her room it must be confessed that she crept to the

glass and stared at the reflection of the face framed in the abundant,

falling hair, until Aimée, wondering at her quietness, raised her head

from her pillow, and, seeing her, called her to her senses.

“Mollie,” she said, in her quietest way, “you look very nice, my dear

and very picturesque, and I don't wonder at your admiring yourself;

but if you stand there much longer in your bare feet you will have

influenza, and then you will have to wear a flannel round your throat,

and your nose will be red, and you won't derive much satisfaction from

your looking-glass for a week to come.”

Vagabondia 1884 · 第 8 / 19 章