_Bal masque_ A masquerade ball.
_Chaperon_ An older woman attending
a girl in society.
_Costume de rigueur_ Costume to be full dress.
_Debut_ First appearance.
_Debutante_ A young girl making her
first social appearance.
_En ville_ E. V. In town or city.
_Fete Champetre_ A rural or outdoor entertainment.
_Matinee_ A morning or daylight
entertainment.
_Matinee musicale_ A daylight musical entertainment.
_Musicale_ Musical entertainment.
_Pour dire adieu_ P. D. A. To say farewell.
_Pour prendre conge_ P. P. C. To take leave.
_Protege_ One under protection.
_Repondez s’il vous plait_ R. S. V. P. Reply if you please.
_Soirée_ An evening party.
_Soirée dansante_ A dancing party.
_Soirée musicale_ A musical entertainment.
The term _en ville_, when used in the place of “city,” in addressing
a note that is to pass through the postman’s hands, is a needless
and annoying affectation, since it is hardly to be expected that a
knowledge of the French language forms one of the qualifications for a
letter-carrier’s position, and if delay ensues in delivery, the writer,
not the carrier, is to blame.
P. P. C. Cards.
In the event of leaving town for a long absence, P. P. C. cards are
frequently sent out. This is especially convenient where the length
of one’s visiting list renders the personal making of farewell calls
an impossibility. The cards are sent out upon the eve of departure,
and all persons receiving them are expected, upon the arrival of the
absentee, to return the courtesy by cards (which may also be sent by
mail) and by invitations. The ordinary engraved visiting card is used,
and the initials P. P. C. (an abbreviation of the French phrase “to
take leave”) are written in capitals in the lower left hand corner of
the card. P. D. A. (to say farewell) is occasionally used, but is not
in general favor. If the address should happen to be engraved in the
lower left hand corner, P. P. C. may be written in the lower right
hand corner, either way being permissible at any time. The large card
inscribed jointly with the name of husband and wife is frequently used
in this connection. P. P. C. cards are especially appropriate where
there are no calls due. If possible, unpaid personal calls should be
answered in person on the eve of departure.
Turning Down the Corners.
This custom is almost out of date, and in consequence of the various
interpretations liable to be given to the act, its disuse is a
satisfaction to all parties concerned. To briefly explain the custom,
a card turned down at the corner, or across one end, signifies that
the call was made in person, and is sometimes very convenient when one
wishes it distinctly understood that the card was brought in person,
not sent; while one folded through the center denotes that the call
includes all members of the family. A man should not turn down the
corners of his cards.
Minor interpretations, such as which end or which corner is to be
turned down on different occasions, even the surviving adherents of the
custom do not pretend to agree upon.
How to Leave Cards.
In leaving cards follow the fashion of those who have paid you the same
courtesy. If a call has been made upon you, return it by a call, as to
return a personal visit by the sending of a bit of pasteboard would
partake of the nature of a slight. If cards only have been sent you by
a servant, return cards in the same manner by messenger or servant;
if they were sent by mail, return by mail. If the cards of any of the
gentlemen of a house are left, always leave the cards of any gentleman
of your family in return.
Of course first calls should be made and returned in person, the
card-leaving formalities coming later on. This rule is departed from
only by a few ladies whom age, health, social or literary duties will
excuse from making personal calls. These frequently permit themselves
to send out cards in place of a first call, either accompanying
them with, or immediately following them by an invitation to some
entertainment. This attention should receive the same notice as a first
call; cards should be sent in return, together with an answer to the
invitation, if it is of a nature to require it, and a personal call
must be made thereafter, unless it was simply an afternoon tea, and an
invitation sent in return speedily as possible.
[Illustration: A SOCIAL CHAT.]
[Illustration: A LEISURE HOUR IN THE PARK.]
A lady leaves a card for a lady only, a gentleman leaves cards for the
host and hostess of a house. Some authorities assert that a man making
the first call of ceremony should, in addition to the first-mentioned
cards, if none of the family are at home, leave another folded down
through the center for the other members of the family. The folding,
however, is questionable taste and the requisite number of cards would
be better left in their original state. Cards should be left for the
daughters of a house; if there are sons, a lady may leave one of her
husband’s for them also.
Number of Cards to be Left.
After this first visit of ceremony it is only necessary to leave one
card at any following call throughout the season. As a rule in country
towns but one card is left at any call, unless it is at the first calls
of a bride, when, if her husband’s name is not engraved upon her card,
she leaves one of his with her own.
A gentleman and lady calling together and finding the mistress of the
house, only, at home, would leave but one card, that of the gentleman
for the master of the house. Finding no one at home, they would leave
three cards, one of hers and two of his. A lady calling under the same
circumstances would leave one of her own cards and two of her husband’s.
When one lady calls upon another, if the hostess be at home she does
not send in her card (unless she is an entire stranger), nor does
etiquette strictly enjoin her to leave it in the hall, unless it is
upon her hostess’ reception day, when, on account of the large number
of visitors, it would be difficult to remember all. It then becomes a
very desirable custom for a lady to leave a card, together with two of
her husband’s. Also when the servant is somewhat dull of comprehension
as to the name it will be well to send in a card to prevent mistakes.
On reception days in very fashionable houses it is the custom to
announce the guests by name as they enter the room, so that cards need
not be sent in.
Never hand your own card to your hostess. If it be necessary, introduce
yourself verbally, doing so quickly and clearly, and being sure to
mention yourself, if a young lady, as “Miss.”
Busy, elderly, and even young men are very prone to leaving their
cards in the hands of mother, sister, wife, or any other lady of the
house for distribution, though after an elaborate entertainment it is
much more indicative of good breeding that a young man should pay his
respects in person to his hostess.
Calls upon Young Ladies.
Young men in this country leave cards for the young ladies of a house,
but they should always leave one at the same time for her mother or
chaperon. In Europe they are never permitted to leave a card for a
young lady at all. They call upon the mother or chaperon, and while
they may offer to send for the young lady, she is never asked after.
If a gentleman, in calling where there are several young ladies,
especially wishes to see one of the number, he may ask for her, but,
before the call is over, should say he would be pleased to see the
other ladies; more especially is there no excuse for ignoring the
existence of the mother or chaperon of the young girl.
If a gentleman knows the ladies of the house well, it is not necessary
for him to send in a card if they are at home, unless it be the first
call of the season, when it is well to leave one in the hall. In a
household consisting of two or more ladies not closely related a card
should be left for each one.
When ladies are visiting in a house where the caller, whether man or
woman, is unacquainted, he or she always leaves a card for the lady of
the house and requests to see her: a request which she may not grant,
but one which it would be a marked slight to omit.
In leaving a card for a friend visiting at a private house, never write
her name upon it; depend upon the servant, or whoever opens the door,
to remember for whom it is intended. This is only permissible when your
friend is at a hotel. In doing this write the name above yours.
When a newly-married man sends cards immediately after his marriage to
his bachelor friends it may be expected that he wishes to retain them
as such in his new life. Upon the reception of these cards they are
expected to call upon the bride at once.
How to Send Cards.
Cards sent by messenger are enclosed in a single unsealed envelope;
sent by mail this envelope is enclosed within another and larger one
which is sealed. Cards handed in at the door are received by the
servant on a salver to prevent being soiled by handling.
When to Leave Cards.
First Calls of the season necessitate the leaving of cards. Let them be
left quietly in the hall. This custom assists the lady of the house in
revising her visiting list.
Letters of Introduction necessitate that those who have received
courtesies in response to such, should, upon their departure, send P.
P. C. cards to those that have thus remembered them.
A Change of Residence renders it desirable to send cards by mail to
one’s friends with the new address engraved thereon. However, should
there be unpaid calls, the cards to these should be left in person.
The Return from an Absence, including any length of time, should be
announced by sending out cards having the address and reception day
engraved upon them. Where P. P. C. cards have been issued previous to
departure these should always follow the return.
Preceding a Debut. Previous to the date decided upon for the
presentation of a _débutante_ to the social world, the young girl’s
mother calls upon those of her friends whom she desires to be present
upon the occasion and leaves them her own and her husband’s cards, and,
if she have grown sons, their cards also.
Reception Invitations to a full dress reception are preceded by a call
by card upon all the acquaintances to whom the hostess may be indebted.
After Cards is the name applied to those that are sent to friends after
a marriage and are engraved thus: