Chevalier, said the bishop, you don't go? We hope for your company at a
small collation.--We must not part with you yet.
I cannot, my lord, accept the favour. Although I had given myself up to
despair of obtaining the happiness to which I once aspired; yet I was not
willing to quit a city that this family had made dear to me, with the
precipitation of a man conscious of misbehaviour. I thank you for the
permission I had to attend you all in full assembly. May God prosper
you, my lord; and may you be invested with the first honours of that
church which must be adorned by so worthy a heart! It will be my glory,
when I am in my native place, or wherever I am, to remember that I was
once thought not unworthy of a rank in a family so respectable. Let me,
my lord, be entitled to your kind remembrance.
He pulled out his handkerchief. My lord, said he, to his father; my
Lord, to the general; Grandison must not go!--and sat down with emotion.
Lady Sforza wept: Laurana seemed moved: the two young lords, Sebastiano
and Juliano, were greatly affected.
I then addressed myself to the marquis, who sat undetermined, as to
speech: My venerable lord, forgive me, that my address was not first paid
here. My heart overflows with gratitude for your goodness in permitting
me to throw myself at your feet, before I took a last farewell of a city
favoured with your residence. Best of fathers, of friends, of men, let
me entreat the continuance of your paternal indulgence to the child
nearest, and deserving to be nearest, to your heart. She is all you and
her mother. Restore her to yourself, and to her, by your indulgence:
that alone, and a blessing on your prayers, can restore her. Adieu, my
good lord: repeated thanks for all your hospitable goodness to a man that
will ever retain a grateful sense of your favour.
You will not yet go, was all he said--he seemed in agitation. He could
not say more.
I then, turning to the count his brother, who sat next him, said, I have
not the honour to be fully known to your lordship: some prejudices from
differences in opinion may have been conceived: but if you ever hear
anything of the man before you unworthy of his name, and of the favour
once designed him; then, my lord, blame, as well as wonder at, the
condescension of your noble brother and sister in my favour.
Who, I! Who, I! said that lord, in some hurry.--I think very well of
you. I never saw a man, in my life, that I liked so well!
Your lordship does me honour. I say this the rather, as I may, on this
solemn occasion, taking leave of such honourable friends, charge my
future life with resolutions to behave worthy of the favour I have met
with in this family.
I passed from him to the general--Forgive, my lord, said I, the seeming
formality of my behaviour in this parting scene: it is a very solemn one
to me. You have expressed yourself of me, and to me, my lord, with more
passion, (forgive me, I mean not to offend you,) than perhaps you will
approve in yourself when I am far removed from Italy. For have you not a
noble mind? And are you not a son of the Marquis della Porretta? Permit
me to observe, that passion will make a man exalt himself, and degrade
another; and the just medium will be then forgot. I am afraid I have
been thought more lightly of, than I ought to be, either in justice, or
for the honour of a person who is dear to every one present. My country
was once mentioned with disdain: think not my vanity so much concerned in
what I am going to say, as my honour: I am proud to be thought an
Englishman: yet I think as highly of every worthy man of every nation
under the sun, as I do of the worthy men of my own. I am not of a
contemptible race in my own country. My father lives in it with the
magnificence of a prince. He loves his son; yet I presume to add, that
that son deems his good name his riches; his integrity his grandeur.
Princes, though they are entitled by their rank to respect, are princes
to him only as they act.
A few words more, my lord.
I have been of the hearing, not of the speaking side of the question, in
the two last conferences I had the honour to hold with your lordship.
Once you unkindly mentioned the word triumph. The word at the time went
to my heart. When I can subdue the natural warmth of my temper, then,
and then only, I have a triumph. I should not have remembered this, had
I not now, my lord, on this solemn occasion, been received by you with an
indignant eye. I respect your lordship too much not to take notice of
this angry reception. My silence upon it, perhaps, would look like
subscribing before this illustrious company to the justice of your
contempt: yet I mean no other notice than this; and this to demonstrate
that I was not, in my own opinion at least, absolutely unworthy of the
favour I met with from the father, the mother, the brothers, you so
justly honour, and which I wished to stand in with you.
And now, my lord, allow me the honour of your hand; and, as I have given
you no cause for displeasure, say, that you will remember me with
kindness, as I shall honour you and your whole family to the last day of
my life.
The general heard me out; but it was with great emotion. He accepted not
my hand; he returned not any answer: the bishop arose, and, taking him
aside, endeavoured to calm him.
I addressed myself to the two young lords, and said, that if ever their
curiosity led them to visit England, where I hoped to be in a few months,
I should be extremely glad of cultivating their esteem and favour, by the
best offices I could do them.
They received my civility with politeness.
I addressed myself next to Lady Laurana--May you, madam, the friend, the
intimate, the chosen companion of Lady Clementina, never know the
hundredth part of the woe that fills the breast of the man before you,
for the calamity that has befallen your admirable cousin, and, because of
that, a whole excellent family. Let me recommend to you, that tender and
soothing treatment to her, which her tender heart would shew to you, in
any calamity that should befall you. I am not a bad man, madam, though
of a different communion from yours. Think but half so charitably of me,
as I do of every one of your religion who lives up to his professions,
and I shall be happy in your favourable thoughts when you hear me spoken
of.
It is easy to imagine, Dr. Bartlett, that I addressed myself in this
manner to this lady whom I had never before seen, that she might not
think the harder of her cousin's prepossessions in favour of a
Protestant.
I recommended myself to the favour of Father Marescotti. He assured me
of his esteem, in very warm terms.
And just as I was again applying to my Jeronymo, the general came to me:
You cannot think, sir, said he, nor did you design it, I suppose, that I
should be pleased with your address to me. I have only this question to
ask, When do you quit Bologna?
Let me ask your lordship, said I, when do you return to Naples?
Why that question, sir? haughtily.
I will answer you frankly. Your lordship, at the first of my
acquaintance with you, invited me to Naples. I promised to pay my
respects to you there. If you think of being there in a week, I will
attend you at your own palace in that city; and there, my lord, I hope,
no cause to the contrary having arisen from me, to be received by you
with the same kindness and favour that you shewed when you gave me the
invitation. I think to leave Bologna to-morrow.
O brother! said the bishop, are you not now overcome?
And are you in earnest? said the general.
I am, my lord. I have many valuable friends, at different courts and
cities in Italy, to take leave of. I never intend to see it again. I
would look upon your lordship as one of those friends; but you seem still
displeased with me. You accepted not my offered hand before; once more I
tender it. A man of spirit cannot be offended at a man of spirit,
without lessening himself. I call upon your dignity, my lord.
He held out his hand, just as I was withdrawing mine. I have pride, you
know, Dr. Bartlett; and I was conscious of a superiority in this
instance: I took his hand, however, at his offer; yet pitied him, that
his motion was made at all, as it wanted that grace which generally
accompanies all he does and says.
The bishop embraced me.--Your moderation, thus exerted, said he, must
ever make you triumph. O Grandison! you are a prince of the Almighty's
creation.
The noble Jeronymo dried his eyes, and held out his arms to embrace me.
The general said, I shall certainly be at Naples in a week. I am too
much affected by the woes of my family, to behave as perhaps I ought on
this occasion. Indeed, Grandison, it is difficult for sufferers to act
with spirit and temper at the same time.
It is, my lord; I have found it so. My hopes raised, as once they were,
now sunk, and absolute despair having taken place of them--Would to God I
had never returned to Italy!--But I reproach not any body.