May I say, first of all, that lack of knowledge means, in nearly every
case, much unnecessary suffering. I was married at twenty-one, and
have had three children--two boys and one girl. Eldest thirty in May,
youngest twenty-five. No miscarriages. I might say that I was very
ignorant when I was married; my mother did not consider it at all
proper to talk about such things. There is too much mock modesty in
the world and too little time given to the things that matter. Knowing
how ignorant I was on matters of motherhood, my husband bought a book
for me called “Advice to a Wife,” by Dr. Henry Pye Chavasse. It is a
beautifully written book and would be a gift of untold value to any
girl about to marry. There is also a sequel entitled “Advice to a
Mother”--it has saved me pounds of expense--price 2s. 6d., by the same
author. Yet, on the other hand, with all this knowledge, I had a very
dreadful time with my first child--in fact, I nearly lost my life and
reason too, and have never really enjoyed good health since. I was
fully six months before I could look after my baby. This was one of
my greatest disappointments. I was obliged to put my little one out
to nurse, although I had an ample supply of milk. My second and third
confinements were very bad, but I was able to get about at the end of
the month. It is always a mystery how some poor mothers get about so
soon, but of course some women are much stronger than others. Here let
me add that through getting about too soon a great deal of suffering
is stored up for later years. My old doctor once said to me that if
women would only realise that a certain amount of rest was absolutely
necessary after confinement, it would add several years to their life.
I cannot speak too strongly about the evils of miscarriages. One
miscarriage brought about unlawfully ruins a woman’s constitution more
than half a dozen children. I have suffered from varicose veins since
my first child was born, and during pregnancy.
My husband’s wages during child-bearing period have been never more
than 24s.; being a piece-worker, _has_ been as low as 9s. The wages
I received when my last child was born (the same week, I mean) were
11s. I was glad to avail myself of a free doctor from the hospital.
I may say I had a black doctor, and was never better attended in my
life. I do not believe in large families. It does not give either the
mother or the children a chance. Here again, I think, much education
is needed. Fathers ought to control their bodies for the sake of the
mother and child. I could quote several instances where a mother’s
life has become intolerable through the husband’s lack of control. I do
trust that the new Maternity Scheme will soon be a fact. I feel that,
when put into working order, thousands of poor mothers will be saved
unnecessary suffering.
_Wages 9s. to 24s.; three children._