On our arrival in New York, we stopped at the ---- hotel till private
lodgings could be obtained. We both wished to be as retired as possible
from public observation, and for this purpose I remained in my room,
where Richard, as my brother, had the privilege of visiting me. I was
anxious he should go immediately to Mr. Brahan's; for, added to my
desire to be under the influence of her feminine regard, I cherished a
faint hope that through him I might learn something of Ernest's
mysterious exile.
They both returned with Richard; and while Mr. Brahan remained with him
below, she came to my chamber, and welcomed me with a warmth and
tenderness that melted, while it cheered.
"You must not stay here one hour longer," said she, pressing one hand in
hers, while she laid the other caressingly on my short, curling hair.
"You must go with me, and feel as much at home as with your own Mrs.
Linwood. I pass a great many lonely hours, while my husband is absent
engaged in business; and it will be a personal favor to me. Indeed, you
must not refuse."
I said something about leaving my brother, while I expressed my
gratitude for her kindness.
"Mr. Brahan will arrange that," she said; "you may be assured he shall
be cared for. You have not unpacked your trunk; and here is your bonnet
and mantilla ready to be resumed. You did not think I would suffer you
to remain among strangers, when my heart has been yearning to meet you
for weary months?"
With gentle earnestness she overcame all my scruples; and it was but a
little time before I found myself established as a guest in the house
where I first beheld the light of existence. How strange it seemed, that
the children of the two betrayed and injured beings who had been made
exiles from that roof, should be received beneath its shelter after the
lapse of so many years!
Mrs. Brahan accompanied me to the chamber prepared for my reception; and
had I been her own daughter she could not have lavished upon me more
affectionate cares. The picture of my mother, which I had returned when
we left the city, was hanging on the wall; and the eyes and lips of
heavenly sweetness seemed to welcome her sad descendant to the home of
her infancy. As I stood gazing upon it with mingled grief and adoration,
Mrs. Brahan encircled me with her arm, and told me she understood now
the history of that picture, and the mystery of its wonderful
resemblance to me. I had not seen her since the notoriety my name had
acquired, in consequence of the diamonds and my father's arrest; and she
knew me now as the daughter of that unhappy man. Did she know the
circumstances of the discovery of my brother, and my husband's flight? I
dared not ask; but I read so much sympathy and compassion in her
countenance, and so much tenderness in her manners, I thought she had
fathomed the depth of my sorrows.
"You look like a girl of fifteen," she said, passing her fingers through
my carelessly waving locks. "Your hair was very beautiful, but I can
scarcely regret its loss."
"I may look more juvenile,--I believe I do, for every one tells me so;
but the youth and bloom of my heart are gone for ever."
"For ever from the lips of the young, and from those more advanced in
life, mean very different things," answered Mrs. Brahan. "I have no
doubt you have happier hours in store, and you will look back to these
as morning shadows melting off in the brightening sunshine."
"Do you know all that has happened, dear Mrs. Brahan, since I left your
city?"
"The rumor of the distressing circumstances which attended the discovery
of your brother reached us even here, and our hearts bled for you. But
all will yet be well. The terrible shock you have sustained will be a
death blow to the passion that has caused you so much misery. Forgive
me, if I make painful allusions; but I cannot suffer you to sink into
the gloom of despondency."
"I try to look upward. I do think the hopes which have no home on earth,
have found rest in heaven."
"But why, my dear young friend, do you close your heart to earthly hope?
Surely, when your husband returns, you may anticipate a joyful reunion."
"When he returns! Alas! his will be a life-long exile. Believing what he
does, he will never, never return."
"But you have written and explained every thing?"
"How can I write,--when I know not where to direct, when I know not to
what region he has wandered, or what resting-place he has found?"
"But Mr. Harland!" said she, with a look of troubled surprise. "You
might learn through him?"
"Mrs. Linwood has written repeatedly to Mr. Harland, and received no
answer. She concluded that he had left the city, but knew not how to
ascertain his address."
"Then you did not know that he had gone to India? I thought,--I
believed,--is it possible that you are not aware"--
"Of what?" I exclaimed, catching hold of her arm, for my brain reeled
and my sight darkened.
"That Mr. Linwood accompanied him," she answered, turning pale at the
agitation her words excited. To India! that distant, deadly clime! To
India, without one farewell, one parting token to her whom he left
apparently on the brink of the grave!
By the unutterable anguish of that moment, I knew the delusion that had
veiled my motives. I had thought it was only to reclaim a lost parent
that I had come, but I found it was the hope of meeting the deluded
wanderer, more than filial piety, that had urged my departure.
"To India!" I cried, and my spirit felt the tossings of the wild billows
that lay rolling between. "Then we are indeed parted,--parted for ever!"
"Why, t'is but a step from ocean to ocean, from clime to clime," she
said in kind, assuring accents. "Men think nothing of such a voyage, for
science has furnished wings which bear them over space with the speed of
an eagle. If you knew not his destination, I should think you would
rejoice rather than mourn, to be relieved of the torture of suspense.
Had I known that you were ignorant of the fact, I should have written
months ago."
"Is it certain that he is gone?" I asked. "Did you see him? Did Mr.
Brahan? How did you learn, what we have vainly sought to know?"
"Mr. Brahan had business with Mr. Harland, and having neglected some
important items, followed him on board the ship in which he embarked. It
was at night, and he remained but a short time; but he caught a glimpse
of your husband, whom he immediately recognized, but who gave him no
opportunity of speaking to him. Knowing he was a friend of Mr.
Harland's, he supposed he had come on board to bid him farewell, though
he was not aware of his being in the city. When we heard the rumor of
the tragic scenes in which he acted so dread a part, and connected it
with the time of Mr. Harland's departure, Mr. Brahan recalled Mr.
Linwood's unexpected appearance in the ship, and the mystery was
explained. But we dreamed not that his departure was unknown to you. If
you had only written to us!"
It was strange that I had never thought of the possibility of their
knowing any thing connected with Ernest. Mr. Harland was the only
gentleman with whom he was on terms of intimacy, the only one to whom we
thought of applying in the extremity of anxiety.
"Has the ship been heard from? What was its name?" I asked, unconscious
of the folly of my first question.
"Not yet. It was called the 'Star of the East.' A beautiful and
hope-inspiring name. Mr. Brahan can give you Mr. Harland's address. You
can write to your husband through him. Every thing is as clear as
noonday. Do you not already inhale the fragrance of the opening flowers
of joy?"
I tried to smile, but I fear it was a woful attempt. Even the scent of
the roses had been crushed out of my heart.
"Your brother is an exceedingly interesting young man," she observed,
perceiving that I could not speak without painful agitation of Ernest.
"I have never seen a stranger who won my regard so instantaneously."
"Dear Richard!" I cried, "he is all that he seems, and far more. The
noblest, kindest, and best. How sad that such a cloud darkens his young
manhood!"
"It will serve as a background to his filial virtues and bring them out
in bright and beautiful relief. I admire, I honor him a thousand times
more than if he were the heir of an unspotted name, a glorious ancestry.
A father's crimes cannot reflect shame on a son so pure and upright.
Besides, he bears another name, and the world knows not his clouded
lineage."
My heart warmed at her generous praises of Richard, who was every day
more and more endeared to my affections. Where was he now? Had he
commenced his mission, and gone to the gloomy cell where his father was
imprisoned? He did not wish me to accompany him the first time. What a
meeting it must be! He had never consciously beheld his father. The
father had no knowledge of his deserted son. In the dungeon's gloom, the
living grave of hope, joy, and fame, the recognition would take place.
With what feelings would the poor, blasted criminal behold the noble
boy, on whom he had never bestowed one parental care, coming like an
angel, if not to unbar his prison doors, to unlock for him the golden
gates of heaven!
I was too weary for my journey, too much exhausted from agitation to
wait for Richard's return, but I could not lay my head on the pillow
before writing to Mrs. Linwood and Edith, and telling them the tidings I
had learned of the beloved exile. And now the first stormy emotions had
subsided, gratitude, deep and holy gratitude, triumphed over every other
feeling. Far, far away as he was, he was with a friend; he was in all
human probability safe, and he could learn in time how deeply he had
wronged me.
Often, on bended knees, with weeping eyes and rending sighs had I
breathed this prayer,--"Only let him know that I am still worthy of his
love, and I am willing to resign it,--let me be justified in his sight,
and I am willing to devote my future life to _Thee_."
The path was opening, the way clearing, and my faith and resignation
about to be proved. I recognized the divine arrangement of Providence in
the apparently accidental circumstances of my life, and my soul
vindicated the justice as well as adored the mercy of the Most High.
A voice seemed whispering in my ear, "O thou afflicted and tossed with
tempests! there is a haven where thy weary bark shall find rest. I, who
once bore the burden of life, know its sorrows and temptations, its
wormwood and its gall. I bore the infirmities of man, that I might pity
and forgive; I bore the crown of thorns, that thou mightest wear the
roses of Paradise; I drained the dregs of human agony, that thou
mightest drink the wine of immortality. Is not my love passing the love
of man, and worth the sacrifice of earth's fleeting joys?"
As the heavenly accents seemed to die away, like a strain of sweet, low
harmony, came murmuring the holy refrain--
"Star of the East, the horizon adorning,
Guide where the infant Redeemer is laid."