[From _De Namin' ob de Twins, and Other Sketches from the Cotton
Land_ (New York, 1908)]
What I gwine name mah Ceely's twins?
I dunno, honey, yit,
But I is jes er-waitin' fer de fines' I kin git,
De names is purty nigh run out,
So many niggahs heah,
I 'clar' dey's t'ick as cotton-bolls in pickin'-time o' yeah.
But 't ain' no use to 'pose to me
Ole secondary names,
Lak 'Liza_beth_ an' Jose_phine_, or Caesah, Torm, an' James,
'Ca'se dese heah twinses ob mah gal's
Is sech a diff'ent kind,
Dey's 'titled to do grandes' names dat ary one kin find.
Fer sho dese little shiny brats
Is got de fus'-cut look,
So mammy wants fine city names, lak you gits out a book;
I ax Marse Rob, an' he done say
Some 'rageous stuff lak dis:
He'd call de bruddah Be'lze_bub_, de sistah Gene_sis_;
Or Alphy an' Omegy--de
Beginnin' an' de en'--
But den, ob co'se no man kin tell, what mo' de Lawd 'll sen';
Fer de pappy ob dese orphans--
You heah me?--I'll be boun',
While dey's er-crawlin' on de flo', he'll be er-lookin' roun';
'Ca'se I done seen dem Judas teahs
He drap at Ceely's grabe,
A-peepin' 'hind his han'kercher, at ole Tim's yaller Gabe;
A-mekin' out to moan an' groan,
Lak he was gwine 'o bus'--
Lawd! honey, dem dat howls de mos,' gits ober it de fus'.
Annynias an' Saphiry,
Sis Tab done say to me,
But he'p me, Lawd! what _do_ she 'spec' dese chillum gwine o'
be?
'Sides, dem names 's got er cur'us soun'--
You says I's hard to please?
Well, so 'ould any granny be, wid sech a pa'r as dese.
Ole Pahson Bob he 'low dat I
Will suttinly be sinnin',
Onless I gibs 'em names dat starts 'em right in de beginnin';
"Iwilla" fer de gal, he say,
F'om de tex' "I will a-rise,"
An' dat 'ould show she's startin' up, todes glory in de skies;
An' fer dis man chile, Aberham--
De fardah ob' em all--
Or else Belshazzah, who done writ dat writin' on de wall;
But Pahson Bob--axcuse me, Lawd!--
Hed bettah sabe his bref
To preach de gospel, an' jes keep his "visin" to hiss'f;
Per nary pusson, white nor black,
Ain' gib no p'int to me
'Bout namin' dese heah Chris'mus gifs, asleep on granny's knee;
(Now heshaby--don' squirm an' twis',
Be still you varmints, do!
You anin' gwine hab no niggah names to tote aroun' wide you!)
'Ca'se on de question ob dese names
I sho is hed mah mine
_Per_zactly an' _per_cidedly done med up all de time;
Fer mah po' Ceely Ann--yas, Lawd,
Jes nigh afo' she died,
She name' dis gal, "Neu-ral-gy," her boy twin, "Hom-i-cide."