Hooray! My would-be Jupiter, a _parvenu_ is told again
He's not the true Olympian, Jack-in-the-Box is "Sold Again!!!"
* * * * *
"ARTIFICIAL OYSTER-CULTIVATION," read Mrs. R., as the heading of a par
in the _Times_. "Good gracious!" she exclaimed, "who on earth would
ever think of eating 'artificial oysters!'"
* * * * *
NOTHING is certain in this life except Death, Quarter Day and stoppage
for ten minutes at Swindon Station.
* * * * *
[Illustration: SO CONVENIENT!
_Young Wife_. "WHERE ARE YOU GOING, REGGIE DEAR?"
_Reggie Dear_. "ONLY TO THE CLUB, MY DARLING."
_Young Wife_. "OH, I DON'T MIND THAT, BECAUSE THERE'S A TELEPHONE
THERE, AND I CAN TALK TO YOU THROUGH IT, CAN'T I?"
_Reggie_. "Y-YES--BUT--ER--YOU KNOW, THE CONFOUNDED WIRES ARE ALWAYS
GETTING OUT OF ORDER!"]
* * * * *