Nations have curious and almost unaccountable peculiarities. One
interlards conversation with shrugs, and another with expectoration; and
a third, by way of indicating satisfaction, rubs its hands. The Scotch
have a peculiarity of their own. When they quit a room, they do not shut
the door, but merely draw it gently after them, so as to leave it
unlatched. Some individuals may not be strictly attached to this
practice; but on the whole the Scotch may, for the sake of distinction,
be said to be an anti-door-shutting nation. Now, why such should be the
case, becomes an interesting philosophical problem.
Much consideration have we spent in pondering on this national oddity,
and are free to admit that the conclusions arrived at are not so
satisfactory as could be wished. Nevertheless, in default of any better
explanation of the phenomenon, what we have to say may possibly carry a
degree of weight.
The reason why the Scotch do not shut the door is, as we imagine, highly
characteristic. It is not that they are ignorant of the important fact,
that doors are made for shutting. They are fully aware that latches are
not mere ornamental attributes of doors--things stuck on not to be used.
And it cannot be imputed to them, that they leave doors open for the
sake of ventilation. In short, if strangers were to guess for a hundred
years, they would fail to hit upon the real, true, and particular reason
why the Scotch do not shut the door. One would naturally think, that as
the act of shutting the door is the prerogative of the person who quits
an apartment, it would not by so mindful a people be neglected. And
neither it is. There is no neglect in the matter. The Scotch take a
profound view of the subject. They institute a rigorous comparison
between shutting and not shutting. True, they are not taught to do so,
any more than Frenchmen are taught to make gestures. It is in them. They
are born with a natural proneness to consider, as if it were a question
of algebraic quantities, whether the satisfaction they might impart by
shutting the door would not be more than counterbalanced by the
dissatisfaction that might accrue from distinctly and unmistakably
shutting it. Still, it seems strange how any displeasure could be
incurred by the performance of what all the rest of mankind believe to
be a mark of good-breeding. Strange, indeed! But it surely will be
observed, that much depends on making a principle of a thing. And with
respect to good-breeding, what if it can be placed in a double point of
sight? It may be the etiquette in some countries to shut the door; but
that proves nothing. In Europe, men uncover their heads on entering the
presence of the great; in the East, they uncover the feet. Fashions are
local. When the Scotch do not shut the door, they act conscientiously,
according to ancient national usage. We may be certain that they have
deliberately, arithmetically, and cautiously, weighed the question of
shutting in its various and delicate bearings; and arrived at the clear
conviction that, all things considered, it would be better not to shut!
Of course, the Scotch having, by innate logic, attained to a principle,
they adhere to it as a thing which neither argument nor raillery can
upset. They have very properly resolved not to be reasoned, nor laughed,
nor cudgelled out of their opinion. The door ought not to be shut! That
is a truth as effectually demonstrated as any truth in mathematics; and
such being the case, they will die rather than yield the point. Let it
be understood, therefore, that in these observations we aim not in the
slightest degree at proselytising our northern friends. They are a
nation of anti-door-shutters, and that, on principle, they will remain
to the end of the chapter.
It may, at the same time, be mentioned, that this acute people have no
special objection to seeing a door shut, provided anybody else does it.
Their principles apply only to shutting by their own hand. What might be
very wrong in them, while quitting an apartment, would be proper enough
for him who remains. He may rise and shut the door, if he feels
inclined. It is his affair. Strictly speaking, he should appreciate the
delicacy of feeling which has gracefully left the performance of this
simple act to his own discretion. Yes, it is in this fine instance of
steady principle that we see a discrimination of politeness exquisitely
ingenious and beautiful. The English have the reputation of being a
blunt, downright people; and their practice of shutting the door after
them makes it certain they are so. When they draw to the door, turn the
handle, and hear the latch click, they as good as say: 'There, the door
is shut; the thing is done. I leave no doubt on the subject; I care not
what you think of me; I have done my duty.' This is England all
over--great, uncalculating, independent-minded England! The Scotch
almost pity this daring recklessness of character. They are astonished
at its boldness. It is action resting on no proper grounds. How
differently they proceed! Treating it as belonging to the science of
numbers, the following becomes the method of stating the question:--
Given that there is a door which may or may not be shut on quitting an
apartment, let it be shewn by the rules of arithmetic whether it would
be preferable to shut the said door or leave it open. Write down, first,
the arguments for not shutting, according to their supposed value; then
do the same for the arguments _per contra_; lastly, sum up both, and
strike the balance. Thus--