I am going to the parliament;
You understand this bag. If you have any business
Depending there be short, and let me hear it,
And pay your fees.
Little French Lawyer
'Shall you be able to carry this honest fellow's cause for him?' said
Mannering.
'Why, I don't know; the battle is not to the strong, but he shall come
off triumphant over Jock of Dawston if we can make it out. I owe him
something. It is the pest of our profession that we seldom see the best
side of human nature. People come to us with every selfish feeling
newly pointed and grinded; they turn down the very caulkers of their
animosities and prejudices, as smiths do with horses' shoes in a white
frost. Many a man has come to my garret yonder that I have at first
longed to pitch out at the window, and yet at length have discovered
that he was only doing as I might have done in his case, being very
angry, and of course very unreasonable. I have now satisfied myself
that, if our profession sees more of human folly and human roguery than
others, it is because we witness them acting in that channel in which
they can most freely vent themselves. In civilised society law is the
chimney through which all that smoke discharges itself that used to
circulate through the whole house, and put every one's eyes out; no
wonder, therefore, that the vent itself should sometimes get a little
sooty. But we will take care our Liddesdale man's cause is well
conducted and well argued, so all unnecessary expense will be saved: he
shall have his pine-apple at wholesale price.'
'Will you do me the pleasure,' said Mannering, as they parted, 'to dine
with me at my lodgings? My landlord says he has a bit of red-deer
venison and some excellent wine.'
'Venison, eh?' answered the Counsellor alertly, but presently
added--'But no! it's impossible; and I can't ask you home neither.
Monday's a sacred day; so's Tuesday; and Wednesday we are to be heard
in the great teind case in presence, but stay--it's frosty weather, and
if you don't leave town, and that venison would keep till Thursday--'
'You will dine with me that day?'
'Under certification.'
'Well, then, I will indulge a thought I had of spending a week here;
and if the venison will not keep, why we will see what else our
landlord can do for us.'
'O, the venison will keep,' said Pleydell; 'and now good-bye. Look at
these two or three notes, and deliver them if you like the addresses. I
wrote them for you this morning. Farewell, my clerk has been waiting
this hour to begin a d-d information.' And away walked Mr. Pleydell
with great activity, diving through closes and ascending covered stairs
in order to attain the High Street by an access which, compared to the
common route, was what the Straits of Magellan are to the more open but
circuitous passage round Cape Horn.
On looking at the notes of introduction which Pleydell had thrust into
his hand, Mannering was gratified with seeing that they were addressed
to some of the first literary characters of Scotland. 'To David Hume,
Esq.'
To John Home, Esq.' 'To Dr. Ferguson.' 'To Dr. Black.' 'To Lord
Kaimes.' 'To Mr. Button.' 'To John Clerk, Esq., of Eldin.' 'To Adam
Smith, Esq.' 'To Dr. Robertson.'
'Upon my word, my legal friend has a good selection of acquaintances;
these are names pretty widely blown indeed. An East-Indian must rub up
his facultiesa little, and put his mind in order, before he enters this
sort of society.'
Mannering gladly availed himself of these introductions; and we regret
deeply it is not in our power to give the reader an account of the
pleasure and information which he received in admission to a circle
never closed against strangers of sense and information, and which has
perhaps at no period been equalled, considering the depth and variety
of talent which it embraced and concentrated.
Upon the Thursday appointed Mr. Pleydell made his appearance at the inn
where Colonel Mannering lodged. The venison proved in high order, the
claret excellent, and the learned counsel, a professed amateur in the
affairs of the table, did distinguished honour to both. I am uncertain,
however, if even the good cheer gave him more satisfaction than the
presence of Dominie Sampson, from whom, in his own juridical style of
wit, he contrived to extract great amusement both for himself and one
or two friends whom the Colonel regaled on the same occasion. The grave
and laconic simplicity of Sampson's answers to the insidious questions
of the barrister placed the bonhomie of his character in a more
luminous point of view than Mannering had yet seen it. Upon the same
occasion he drew forth a strange quantity of miscellaneous and
abstruse, though, generally speaking, useless learning. The lawyer
afterwards compared his mind to the magazine of a pawnbroker, stowed
with goods of every description, but so cumbrously piled together, and
in such total disorganisation, that the owner can never lay his hands
upon any one article at the moment he has occasion for it.
As for the advocate himself, he afforded at least as much exercise to
Sampson as he extracted amusement from him. When the man of law began
to get into his altitudes, and his wit, naturally shrewd and dry,
became more lively and poignant, the Dominie looked upon him with that
sort of surprise with which we can conceive a tame bear might regard
his future associate, the monkey, on their being first introduced to
each other. It was Mr. Pleydell's delight to state in grave and serious
argument some position which he knew the Dominie would be inclined to
dispute. He then beheld with exquisite pleasure the internal labour
with which the honest man arranged his ideas for reply, and tasked his
inert and sluggish powers to bring up all the heavy artillery of his
learning for demolishing the schismatic or heretical opinion which had
been stated, when behold, before the ordnance could be discharged, the
foe had quitted the post and appeared in a new position of annoyance on
the Dominie's flank or rear. Often did he exclaim 'Prodigious!' when,
marching up to the enemy in full confidence of victory, he found the
field evacuated, and it may be supposed that it cost him no little
labour to attempt a new formation. 'He was like a native Indian army,'
the Colonel said, 'formidable by numerical strength and size of
ordnance, but liable to be thrown into irreparable confusion by a
movement to take them in flank.' On the whole, however, the Dominie,
though somewhat fatigued with these mental exertions, made at unusual
speed and upon the pressure of the moment, reckoned this one of the
white days of his life, and always mentioned Mr. Pleydell as a very
erudite and fa-ce-ti-ous person.
By degrees the rest of the party dropped off and left these three
gentlemen together. Their conversation turned to Mrs. Bertram's
settlements. 'Now what could drive it into the noddle of that old
harridan,' said Pleydell, 'to disinherit poor Lucy Bertram under
pretence of settling her property on a boy who has been so long dead
and gone? I ask your pardon, Mr. Sampson, I forgot what an affecting
case this was for you; I remember taking your examination upon it, and
I never had so much trouble to make any one speak three words
consecutively. You may talk of your Pythagoreans or your silent
Brahmins, Colonel; go to, I tell you this learned gentleman beats them
all in taciturnity; but the words of the wise are precious, and not to
be thrown away lightly.'
'Of a surety,' said the Dominie, taking his blue-checqued handkerchief
from his eyes, 'that was a bitter day with me indeed; ay, and a day of
grief hard to be borne; but He giveth strength who layeth on the load.'
Colonel Mannering took this opportunity to request Mr. Pleydell to
inform him of the particulars attending the loss of the boy; and the
Counsellor, who was fond of talking upon subjects of criminal
jurisprudence, especially when connected with his own experience, went
through the circumstances at full length. 'And what is your opinion
upon the result of the whole?'
'O, that Kennedy was murdered: it's an old case which has occurred on
that coast before now, the case of Smuggler versus Exciseman.'
'What, then, is your conjecture concerning the fate of the child?'
'O, murdered too, doubtless,' answered Pleydell. 'He was old enough to
tell what he had seen, and these ruthless scoundrels would not scruple
committing a second Bethlehem massacre if they thought their interest
required it.'
The Dominie groaned deeply, and ejaculated, 'Enormous!'
'Yet there was mention of gipsies in the business too, Counsellor,'
said Mannering, 'and from what that vulgar-looking fellow said after
the funeral--'
'Mrs. Margaret Bertram's idea that the child was alive was founded upon
the report of a gipsy?' said Pleydell, catching at the half-spoken
hint. 'I envy you the concatenation, Colonel; it is a shame to me not
to have drawn the same conclusion. We'll follow this business up
instantly. Here, hark ye, waiter, go down to Luckie Wood's in the
Cowgate; ye'll find my clerk Driver; he'll be set down to high jinks by
this time--for we and our retainers, Colonel, are exceedingly regular
in our irregularities--tell him to come here instantly and I will pay
his forfeits.'
'He won't appear in character, will he?' said Mannering.
'Ah! "no more of that, Hal, an thou lovest me,"' said Pleydell. 'But we
must have some news from the land of Egypt, if possible. O, if I had
but hold of the slightest thread of this complicated skein, you should
see how I would unravel it! I would work the truth out of your
Bohemian, as the French call them, better than a monitoire or a plainte
de Tournelle; I know how to manage a refractory witness.'
While Mr. Pleydell was thus vaunting his knowledge of his profession,
the waiter reentered with Mr. Driver, his mouth still greasy with
mutton pies, and the froth of the last draught of twopenny yet
unsubsided on his upper lip, with such speed had he obeyed the commands
of his principal. 'Driver, you must go instantly and find out the woman
who was old Mrs. Margaret Bertram's maid. Inquire for her everywhere,
but if you find it necessary to have recourse to Protocol, Quid the
tobacconist, or any other of these folks, you will take care not to
appear yourself, but send some woman of your acquaintance; I daresay
you know enough that may be so condescending as to oblige you. When you
have found her out, engage her to come to my chambers tomorrow at eight
o'clock precisely.'
'What shall I say to make her forthcoming?' asked the aid-de-camp.
'Anything you choose,' replied the lawyer. 'Is it my business to make
lies for you, do you think? But let her be in praesentia by eight
o'clock, as I have said before.' The clerk grinned, made his reverence,
and exit.
'That's a useful fellow,' said the Counsellor; 'I don't believe his
match ever carried a process. He'll write to my dictating three nights
in the week without sleep, or, what's the same thing, he writes as well
and correctly when he's asleep as when he's awake. Then he's such a
steady fellow; some of them are always changing their ale-houses, so
that they have twenty cadies sweating after them, like the bare-headed
captains traversing the taverns of Eastcheap in search of Sir John
Falstaff. But this is a complete fixture; he has his winter seat by the
fire and his summer seat by the window in Luckie Wood's, betwixt which
seats are his only migrations; there he's to be found at all times when
he is off duty. It is my opinion he never puts off his clothes or goes
to sleep; sheer ale supports him under everything. It is meat, drink,
and cloth, bed, board, and washing.'
'And is he always fit for duty upon a sudden turnout? I should distrust
it, considering his quarters.'
'O, drink, never disturbs him, Colonel; he can write for hours after he
cannot speak. I remember being called suddenly to draw an appeal case.
I had been dining, and it was Saturday night, and I had ill will to
begin to it; however, they got me down to Clerihugh's, and there we sat
birling till I had a fair tappit hen [Footnote: See Note 2.] under my
belt, and then they persuaded me to draw the paper. Then we had to seek
Driver, and it was all that two men could do to bear him in, for, when
found, he was, as it happened, both motionless and speechless. But no
sooner was his pen put between his fingers, his paper stretched before
him, and he heard my voice, than he began to write like a scrivener;
and, excepting that we were obliged to have somebody to dip his pen in
the ink, for he could not see the standish, I never saw a thing
scrolled more handsomely.'
'But how did your joint production look the next morning?' said the
Colonel.
'Wheugh! capital! not three words required to be altered: [Footnote:
See Note 3. ] it was sent off by that day's post. But you'll come and
breakfast with me to-morrow, and hear this woman's examination?'
'Why, your hour is rather early.'
'Can't make it later. If I were not on the boards of the Outer House
precisely as the nine-hours' bell rings, there would be a report that I
had got an apoplexy, and I should feel the effects of it all the rest
of the session.'
'Well, I will make an exertion to wait upon you.'
Here the company broke up for the evening.
In the morning Colonel Mannering appeared at the Counsellor's chambers,
although cursing the raw air of a Scottish morning in December. Mr.
Pleydell had got Mrs. Rebecca installed on one side of his fire,
accommodated her with a cup of chocolate, and was already deeply
engaged in conversation with her. 'O no, I assure you, Mrs. Rebecca,
there is no intention to challenge your mistress's will; and I give you
my word of honour that your legacy is quite safe. You have deserved it
by your conduct to your mistress, and I wish it had been twice as much.'
'Why, to be sure, sir, it's no right to mention what is said before
ane; ye heard how that dirty body Quid cast up to me the bits o'
compliments he gied me, and tell'd ower again ony loose cracks I might
hae had wi' him; now if ane was talking loosely to your honour, there's
nae saying what might come o't.'
'I assure you, my good Rebecca, my character and your own age and
appearance are your security, if you should talk as loosely as an
amatory poet.'
'Aweel, if your honour thinks I am safe--the story is just this. Ye
see, about a year ago, or no just sae lang, my leddy was advised to go
to Gilsland for a while, for her spirits were distressing her sair.
Ellangowan's troubles began to be spoken o' publicly, and sair vexed
she was; for she was proud o' her family. For Ellangowan himsell and
her, they sometimes 'greed and some times no; but at last they didna
'gree at a' for twa or three year, for he was aye wanting to borrow
siller, and that was what she couldna bide at no hand, and she was aye
wanting it paid back again, and that the Laird he liked as little. So
at last they were clean aff thegither. And then some of the company at
Gilsland tells her that the estate was to be sell'd; and ye wad hae
thought she had taen an ill will at Miss Lucy Bertram frae that moment,
for mony a time she cried to me, "O Becky, O Becky, if that useless
peenging thing o' a lassie there at Ellangowan, that canna keep her
ne'er-do-weel father within bounds--if she had been but a lad-bairn
they couldna hae sell'd the auld inheritance for that fool-body's
debts"; and she would rin on that way till I was just wearied and sick
to hear her ban the puir lassie, as if she wadna hae been a lad-bairn
and keepit the land if it had been in her will to change her sect. And
ae day at the spaw-well below the craig at Gilsland she was seeing a
very bonny family o' bairns--they belanged to ane Mac-Crosky--and she
broke out--"Is not it an odd like thing that ilka waf carle in the
country has a son and heir, and that the house of Ellangowan is without
male succession?" There was a gipsy wife stood ahint and heard her, a
muckle sture fearsome-looking wife she was as ever I set een on. "Wha
is it," says she, "that dare say the house of Ellangowan will perish
without male succession?" My mistress just turned on her; she was a
high-spirited woman, and aye ready wi' an answer to a' body. "It's me
that says it," says she, "that may say it with a sad heart." Wi' that
the gipsy wife gripped till her hand--"I ken you weel eneugh," says
she, "though ye kenna me. But as sure as that sun's in heaven, and as
sure as that water's rinning to the sea, and as sure as there's an ee
that sees and an ear that hears us baith, Harry Bertram, that was
thought to perish at Warroch Point, never did die there. He was to have
a weary weird o't till his ane-and-twentieth year, that was aye said o'
him; but if ye live and I live, ye'll hear mair o' him this winter
before the snaw lies twa days on the Dun of Singleside. I want nane o'
your siller," she said, "to make ye think I am blearing your ee; fare
ye weel till after Martinmas." And there she left us standing.'
'Was she a very tall woman?' interrupted Mannering.
'Had she black hair, black eyes, and a cut above the brow?' added the
lawyer.
'She was the tallest woman I ever saw, and her hair was as black as
midnight, unless where it was grey, and she had a scar abune the brow
that ye might hae laid the lith of your finger in. Naebody that's seen
her will ever forget her; and I am morally sure that it was on the
ground o' what that gipsy-woman said that my mistress made her will,
having taen a dislike at the young leddy o' Ellangowan. And she liked
her far waur after she was obliged to send her L20; for she said Miss
Bertram, no content wi' letting the Ellangowan property pass into
strange hands, owing to her being a lass and no a lad, was coming, by
her poverty, to be a burden and a disgrace to Singleside too. But I
hope my mistress's is a good will for a' that, for it would be hard on
me to lose the wee bit legacy; I served for little fee and bountith,
weel I wot.'
The Counsellor relieved her fears on this head, then inquired after
Jenny Gibson, and understood she had accepted Mr. Dinmont's offer. 'And
I have done sae mysell too, since he was sae discreet as to ask me,'
said Mrs. Rebecca; 'they are very decent folk the Dinmonts, though my
lady didna dow to hear muckle about the friends on that side the house.
But she liked the Charlie's Hope hams and the cheeses and the muir-fowl
that they were aye sending, and the lamb's-wool hose and mittens--she
liked them weel eneugh.'
Mr. Pleydell now dismissed Mrs. Rebecca. When she was gone, 'I think I
know the gipsy-woman,' said the lawyer.
'I was just going to say the same,' replied Mannering.
'And her name,' said Pleydell--
'Is Meg Merrilies,' answered the Colonel.
'Are you avised of that?' said the Counsellor, looking at his military
friend with a comic expression of surprise.
Mannering answered that he had known such a woman when he was at
Ellangowan upwards of twenty years before; and then made his learned
friend acquainted with all the remarkable particulars of his first
visit there.
Mr. Pleydell listened with great attention, and then replied, 'I
congratulated myself upon having made the acquaintance of a profound
theologian in your chaplain; but I really did not expect to find a
pupil of Albumazar or Messahala in his patron. I have a notion,
however, this gipsy could tell us some more of the matter than she
derives from astrology or second-sight. I had her through hands once,
and could then make little of her, but I must write to Mac-Morlan to
stir heaven and earth to find her out. I will gladly come to--shire
myself to assist at her examination; I am still in the commission of
the peace there, though I have ceased to be sheriff. I never had
anything more at heart in my life than tracing that murder and the fate
of the child. I must write to the sheriff of Roxburghshire too, and to
an active justice of peace in Cumberland.'
'I hope when you come to the country you will make Woodbourne your
headquarters?'
'Certainly; I was afraid you were going to forbid me. But we must go to
breakfast now or I shall be too late.'
On the following day the new friends parted, and the Colonel rejoined
his family without any adventure worthy of being detailed in these
chapters.