VII.--LEONI THE TROUBLE MAKER

It was a perfect day for a funeral. The thin October air had in it a

half-chill, like the cutting edge of the coming winter, still six weeks

away. The leaves, crisp and brown from early frosts, seemed to rustle

approval of the mournful completeness of things.

Florists' shops had been ransacked, greenhouses laid waste, the leading

carriages were moving jungles of blossoms. It was magnificent, and

as the procession wound its slow way into Calvary, the heart of the

undertaker swelled with pride. Not that he was justified; the glory

was the glory of Paper-Box Johnny, who stood back of all this gloomy

splendor with his purse.

“Remember,” was Paper-Box's word to the undertaker, “I'm no piker, an'

neither was Phil; so wade in wit' th' bridle off, an' make th' spiel

same as if you was buryin' yourself.”

Thus exhorted, and knowing the solvency of Paper-Box, the undertaker had

no more than broken even with his responsibilities.

Later, Paper-Box became smitten of concern because he hadn't thought to

hire a brass band. A brass band, he argued, breathing Chopin's Funeral

March, would have given the business a last artistic touch.

“I'd ought to have me nut caved in for forget-tin' it,” he declared;

“but Phil bein' croaked like he was, got me rattled. I'm all in th' air

right now! Me head won't be on straight ag'in for a mont'.”

In the face of Paper-Box's self-condemnation, ones expert in those

sorrowful matters of crape and immortelles, averred that the funeral was

a credit to Casey, and regrets were expressed that the bullet in that

dead hero's brain forbade his sitting up in the hearse and enjoying what

was being done in his honor.

As the first shovelful of earth awoke the hollow responses of the

coffin, there occurred what story writers are fond of describing as a

dramatic incident. As though the hollow coffin-note had been the dead

voice of Casey calling, Dago Frankie knelt at the edge of the grave.

Lifting his hands to heaven, he vowed to shed without mercy the blood of

Goldie Louie and Brother Bill Orr, on sight. The vow was well received

by the uncovered ring of mourners, and no one doubted but Casey's

eternal slumbers would be the sounder for it.

In the beginning, she went by the name of Leoni; the same being

subsequently lengthened, for good and sufficient reasons, to Leoni the

Trouble Maker. As against this, however, her monaker, with the addition,

“Badger,” as written upon her picture--gallery number 7409--to be found

in that interesting art collection maintained by the police, was given

as Mabel Grey.

Leoni--according to Detective Biddinger of that city's Central

Office--was born in Chicago, upon a spot not distant from the banks of

the classic Drainage Canal. She came to New York, and began attracting

police attention about eight years ago. In those days, radiant as a

star, face of innocent beauty, her affections were given to an eminent

pickpocket known and dreaded as Crazy Barry, and it was the dance she

led that bird-headed person's unsettled destinies which won her the _nom

de cour_ of Trouble Maker.

It was unfortunate, perhaps, since it led to many grievous

complications, that Leoni's love lacked every quality of the permanent.

Hot, fierce, it resembled in its intensity a fire in a lumber yard.

Also, like a fire in a lumber yard, it soon burned itself out. Her heart

was as the heart of a wild goose, and wondrous migratory.

Having loved Crazy Barry for a space, Leoni turned cool, then cold, then

fell away from him altogether. At this, Crazy Barry, himself a volcano

of sensibility, with none of Leoni's saving genius to grow cold, waxed

wroth and chafed.

While in this mixed and storm-tossed humor, he came upon Leoni in the

company of a fellow gonoph known as McTafife. In testimony of what

hell-pangs were tearing at his soul, Crazy Barry fell upon McTaffe, and

cut him into red ribbons with a knife. He would have cut his throat, and

spoke of doing so, but was prevailed upon to refrain by Kid Jacobs, who

pointed out the electrocutionary inconveniences sure to follow such a

ceremony.

“They'd slam youse in th' chair, sure!” was the sober-headed way that

Jacobs put it.

Crazy Barry, one hand in McTafife's hair, had drawn the latter's head

across his knee, the better to attend to the throat-cutting. Convinced,

however, by the words of Jacobs, he let the head, throat all unslashed,

fall heavily to the floor. After which, first wiping the blood from

his knife on McTafife's coat--for he had an instinct to be neat--he

lam-mistered for parts unknown, while McTafife was conveyed to the New

York Hospital. This chanced in the Sixth Avenue temple of entertainment

kept by the late Paddy the Pig.

Once out of the hospital and into the street, McTafife and the fair

Leoni found no trouble in being all the world to one another. Crazy

Barry was a thing of the past and, since the Central Office dicks wanted

him, likely to remain so.

McTafife was of the swell mob. He worked with Goldie Louie, Fog-eye

Howard and Brother Bill Orr. Ask any Central Office bull, half learned

in his trade of crook-catcher, and he'll tell you that these names are

of a pick-purse peerage. McTaffe himself was the stinger, and personally

pinched the poke, or flimped the thimble, or sprung the prop, of

whatever boob was being trimmed. The others, every one a star, were

proud to act as his stalls; and that, more than any Central Office

assurance, should show how near the top was McTaffe in gonoph

estimation.

Every profession has its drawbacks, and that of picking pockets

possesses several. For one irritating element, it is apt to take the

practitioner out of town for weeks on end. Some sucker puts up a roar,

perhaps, and excites the assiduities of the police; or there is a prize

fight at Reno, or a World's Fair at St. Louis, or a political convention

at Chicago, or a crowd-gathering tour by some notable like Mr. Roosevelt

or Mr. Taft, which gives such promise of profit that it is not to be

refused. Thus it befell that McTaffe, with his mob, was greatly abroad

in the land, leaving Leoni deserted and alone.

Once McTaffe remained away so long that it caused Leoni uneasiness, if

not alarm.

“Mack's fell for something,” was the way she set forth her fears to

Big Kitty: “You can gamble he's in hock somewheres, or I'd have got the

office from him by wire or letter long ago.”

When McTaffe at last came back, his face exhibited pain and defeat. He

related how the mob had been caught in a jam in Chihuahua, and Goldie

Louie lagged.

“The rest of the fleet managed to make a getaway,” said McTaffe, “all

but poor Goldie. Those Greasers have got him right, too; he's cinched

to do a couple of spaces sure. When I reached El Paso, I slimmed me roll

for five hundred bucks, an' hired him a mouthpiece. But what good is a

mouthpiece when there ain't the shadow of a chance to spring him?”

“So Goldie got a rumble, did he?” said Leoni, with a half sigh.

Her tones were pensive to the verge of tears; since her love for Goldie

was almost if not quite equal to the love she bore McTaffe.

Goldie Louie lay caged in the Chihuahua calaboose, and Sanky Dunn

joined out with McTaffe and the others in his place. With forces thus

reorganized, McTaffe took up the burdens of life again, and--here one

day and gone the next--existence for himself and Leoni returned to

old-time lines.

Leoni met Casey. With smooth, dark, handsome face, Casey was the

superior in looks of either McTaffe or Goldie Louie. Also, he had fame

as a gun-fighter, and for a rock-like steadiness under fire. He was

credited, too, by popular voice, with having been busy in the stirring,

near vicinity of events, when divers gentlemen got bumped off. This had

in it a fascination for Leoni, who--as have the ladies of every age and

clime--dearly loved a warrior. Moreover, Casey had money, and, unlike

those others, he was always on the job. This last was important to

Leoni, who at any moment might find herself at issue with the powers,

and Casey, because of his political position, could speak to the judge.

Leoni loved Casey, even as she had aforetime loved McTaffe, Goldie Louie

and Crazy Barry. True, Casey owned a wife. But there arose nothing in

his conduct to indicate it; and since he was too much of a gentleman to

let it get in any one's way, Leoni herself was so generous as to treat

it as a technicality.

McTaffe and his mob returned from a losing expedition through the West.

Leoni asked as to results.

“Why,” explained McTaffe, sulkily, “th' trip was not only a waterhaul,

but it leaves me on the nut for twelve hundred bones.”

McTaffe turned his pockets inside out, by way of corroboration.

While thus irritated because of that financial setback, McTaffe heard

of Leoni's blushing nearness to Casey. It was the moment of all moments

when he was least able to bear the blow with philosophy.

And McTaffe stormed. Going farther, and by way of corrective climax, he

knocked Leoni down with a club. After which--according to eye-witnesses,

who spoke without prejudice--he proceeded to beat her up for fair.

Leoni told her adventures to Casey, and showed him what a harvest of

bruises her love for him had garnered. Casey, who hadn't been born and

brought up in Mulberry Bend to become a leading light of Gangland for

nothing, took his gun and issued forth on the trail of McTaffe. McTaffe

left town. Also, that he didn't take his mob with him proved that

not graft, but fear of Casey, was the bug beneath the chip of his

disappearance.

“He's sherried,” Casey told Leoni, when that ill-used beauty asked if he

had avenged her bruises. “But he'll blow in ag'in; an' when he does I'll

cook him.”

Goldie Louie came up from Chihuahua, his yellow hair shot with gray,

the prison pallor in the starved hollows of his cheeks. Mexicans are

the most merciless of jailers. Fog-eye Howard, who was nothing if not

a gossip, wised him up as to Leoni's love for Casey. In that connection

Fog-eye related how McTaffe, having rebuked Leoni's heart wanderings

with that convincing club, had now become a fugitive from Casey's gun.

Having heard Fog-eye to the end, Goldie faithfully hunted up Leoni and

wore out a second club on her himself. Again did Leoni creep to Casey

with her woes and her wrongs, and again did that Knight of Mulberry Bend

gird up his fierce loins to avenge her.

Let us step rearward a pace.

After the Committee of Fourteen, in its uneasy purities, had caused

Chick Tricker's Park Row license to be revoked, Tricker, seeking a

livelihood, became the owner of the Stag in Twenty-eighth Street, just

off Broadway. That license revocation had been a financial jolt, and

now in new quarters, with Berlin Auggy, whom he had brought with him

as partner, he was striving, in every way not likely to invoke police

interference to re-establish his prostrate destiny.

It was the evening next after the one upon which Goldie Louie, following

the example of the vanished McTaffe, had expressed club-wise his

disapproval of Leoni's love for Casey. The Stag was a riot of life and

light and laughter; music and conversation and drink prevailed. In the

rear room--fenced off from the bar by swinging doors--was Goldie Louie,

together with Fog-eye Howard, Brother Bill Orr and Sanky Dunn. There,

too, Whitey Dutch was entertaining certain of the choicest among the

Five Pointers. Scattered here and there were Little Red, the Baltimore

Rat, Louis Buck, Stager Bennett, Jack Cohalan, the Humble Dutchman, and

others of renown in the grimy chivalry of crime. There were fair ones,

too, and the silken sex found dulcet representation in such unchallenged

belles as Pretty Agnes, Jew Yetta, Dutch Ida, and Anna Gold. True, an

artist in womanly beauty might have found defects in each of these. And

if so? Venus had a mole on her cheek, Helen a scar on her chin.

Tricker was not with his guests at the Stag that night. His father

had been reported sick, and Tricker was in filial attendance at the

Fourteenth Street bedside of his stricken sire. In his absence, Auggy

took charge, and under his genial management beer flowed, coin came in,

and all Stag things went moving merrily.

Whitey Dutch, speaking to Stagger Bennett concerning Pioggi, aforetime

put away in the Elmira Reformatory for the Coney Island killing of

Cyclone Louie and Kid Twist, made quite a tale of how Pioggi, having

served his time, had again shown up in town. Whitey mentioned, as a

matter for general congratulation, that Pioggi's Elmira experience had

not robbed him of his right to vote, as would have been the blighting

case had he gone to Sing Sing.

“There's nothing in that disfranchisement thing, anyhow,” grumbled

the Humble Dutchman, who sat sourly listening. “I've been up th'

river twict, an' I've voted a dozen times every election since. Them

law-makin' stiffs is goin' to take your vote away! Say, that gives me a

pain!”

The Humble Dutchman got off the last in tones of supreme contempt.

Grouped around a table near the center, and under convoy of a Central

Office representative who performed towards them in the triple rôle of

guide, philosopher and friend, were gathered a half dozen Fifth Avenue

males and females, all members in good standing of the Purple and

Fine Linen Gang. Auggy, in the absence of Tricker, had received them

graciously, pressed cigars and drinks upon them, declining the while

their proffered money of the realm in a manner composite of suavity and

princely ease.

“It's an honor, loides an' gents,” said Auggy, “merely to see your maps

in the Stag at all. As for th' booze an' smokes, they're on th' house.

Your dough don't go here, see!”

The Purple and Fine Linen contingent called their visit slumming. If

they could have heard what Auggy, despite his beaming smiles and royal

liberality touching those refreshments, called both them and their

visit, after they had left, it might have set their patrician ears

afire.

Having done the Stag, and seen and heard and misunderstood things to

their slumming souls' content, the Purple and Fine Linen Gang said

goodbye. They must drop in--they explained--at the Haymarket, just

around the corner in Sixth Avenue. Auggy invited them to come again, but

was visibly relieved once they had gone their slumming way.

“I was afraid every minute some duck'd start something,” said Auggy,

“an' of course if anything did break loose--any little t'ing, if it

ain't no more than soakin' some dub in th' jaw--one of them Fift' Avenoo

dames's 'ud be bound to t'row a fit.”

“Say!” broke in Anna Gold resentfully; “it's somethin' fierce th' way

them high s'ciety fairies comes buttin' in on us. W'at do they think

they're tryin' to give us, anyway? For th' price of a beer, I'd have

snatched one of them baby-dolls baldheaded. I'd have nailed her be th'

mop; an' w'en I'd got t'rough doin' stunts wit' her, she wouldn't have

had to tell no one she'd been slummin'.”

“Now, forget it!” interposed Auggy warningly. “You go reachin' for any

skirt's puffs round here, an' it'll be the hurry-up wagon at a gallop

an' you for the cooler, Anna. The Stag's a quiet joint, an' that

rough-house stuff don't go. Chick won't stand for no one to get hoited.”

“Oh, Chick won't stand for no one to get hoited!” retorted the acrid

Anna, in mighty dudgeon. “An' the Stag's a quiet joint! Why, it ain't

six weeks since a guy pulls a cannister in this very room, an' shoots

Joe Rocks full of holes. You helps take him to the hospital yourself.”

“Cut out that Joe Rocks stuff,” commanded Aug-gy, with vast heat, “or

you'll hit the street on your frizzes--don't make no mistake!”

Observing the stormy slant the talk was taking, Whitey Dutch

diplomatically ordered beer, and thus put an end to debate. It was a

move full of wisdom. Auggy was made nervous by the absence of Tricker,

and Anna the Voluble, on many a field, had shown herself a lady of

spirit.

While the evening at the Stag thus went happily wearing towards the

smaller hours, over in Twenty-ninth Street, a block away, the stuss

game of Casey and Paper-Box Johnny was in full and profitable blast.

Paper-Box himself was in active charge. Casey had for the moment

abandoned business and every thought of it. Leoni had just informed

him of those visitations at the hands of Goldie Louie, and set him to

thinking on other things than cards.

“An' he says,” concluded Leoni, preparing to go, “after he's beat me

half to death, 'now chase 'round an' tell your Dago friend, Casey, that

my monaker ain't McTaffe, an' that if he starts to hand me anythin',

I'll put him down in Bellevue for the count.'”

The dark face of Casey displayed both anger and resolution. He made

neither threat nor comment, but his eyes were full of somber fires.

Leoni departed with an avowed purpose of subjecting her injuries to the

curative effects of arnica, while Casey continued to gloom and glower,

drinking deeply the while to take the edge off his feelings.

Harry Lemmy, a once promising prize-fighter of the welter-weight

variety, showed up. Also, he had no more than settled to the drink,

which Casey--whom the wrongs of his idolized Leoni could not render

unmindful of the claims of hospitality--had ordered, when Jack Kenny and

Charlie Young appeared.

The latter, not alive to the fatal importance of such news, spoke of the

Stag, which he had left but the moment before, and of the presence there

of Goldie Louie.

“McTaffe's stalls, Fog-eye, Brother Bill an' Sanky Dunn, are lushin'

wit' him,” said Young. “You know Sanky filled in wit' th' mob th' time

Goldie gets settled in Mexico.”

Goldie Louie, only a block away, set the torch to Casey's heart.

“Where's Dago Frankie?” he asked.

Dago Frankie was his nearest and most trusted friend.

“He's over in Sixt' Avenoo shootin' craps,” replied Lemmy. “Shall I go

dig him up?”

“It don't matter,” said Casey, after a moment's thought. Then, getting

up from his chair, he inquired, “Have you guys got your cannons?”

“Sure t'ing!” came the general chorus, with a closer from Kenny.

“I've got two,” he said. “A sport might get along wit'out a change of

shoits in Noo York, but he never ought to be wit'out a change of guns.”

“W'at's on, Phil?” asked Charlie Young, anxiously, as Casey pulled a

magazine pistol, and carefully made sure that its stomach was full of

cartridges; “w'at's on?”

“I'm goin' over to the Stag,” replied Casey. “If you ducks'll listen

you'll hear a dog howl in about a minute.”

“We'll not only listen, but we'll go 'long,” returned Young.

Lemmy and Kenny fell behind the ethers. “W'at's th' muss?” whispered

Lemmy.

“It's Leoni,” explained Kenny guardedly. “Goldie give her a wallop or

two last night, an' Phil's goin' to do him for it.”

Casey strode into the Stag, his bosom a storm-center for every black

emotion. The sophisticated Auggy smelled instant trouble on him, as one

smells fire in a house. Bending over the friendly shoulder of Whitey

Dutch, Auggy spoke in a low tone of warning.

“There's Phil Casey,” he said, “an' t'ree of his bunch. It's apples to

ashes he's gunnin' for Goldie. If Chick were here, now, he'd somehow put

the smother on him.”

“Give him a call-down your own self,” was Whitey's counsel. “W'at with

Chick's license bein' revoked in Park Row, an' Joe Rocks goin' to the

hospital from here only a little over a mont' ago, the least bit

of cannonadin' 's bound to put th' joint in Dutch all the way from

headquarters to the State excise dubs in Albany.”

“I know it,” returned Auggy, in great trouble of mind. “If a gun so much

as cracks once, it'll be th' fare-you-well of the Stag.”

“Well, w'at do youse say?” demanded the loyal Whitey. “I'm wit' youse,

an' I'm wit' Chick, an' I'm wit' Goldie. Give th' woid, an' I'll pull in

a harness bull from off his beat.”

“No, none of that! Chick'd sooner burn the joint than call a cop.”

“I'll go give Casey a chin,” said Whitey, “meb-by I can hold him down.

You put Goldie wise. Tell him to keep his lamps on Casey, an' if Casey

reaches for his gatt to beat him to it.”

Casey the decisive moved swiftly, however, and the proposed peace

intervention failed for being too slow. Casey got a glimpse of Goldie

through the separating screen doors. It was all he wanted. The next

moment he had charged through.

Chairs crashed, tables were overthrown, women shrieked and men cursed.

Twenty guns were out. Casey fired six times at Goldie Louie, and six

times missed that lucky meddler with other people's pocket-books. Not

that Casey's efforts were altogether thrown away. His first bullet

lodged in the stomach of Fog-eye, while his third broke the arm of

Brother Bill.

Whitey Dutch reached Casey as the latter began his artillery practice,

and sought by word and moderate force to induce a truce. Losing

patience, however, Whitey, as Casey fired his final shot, pulled his own

gun and put a bullet through and through that berserk's head. As Casey

fell forward, a second bullet--coming from anywhere--buried itself in

his back.

“By the Lord, I've croaked Phil!” was the exclamation of Whitey,

addressed to no one in particular.

They were Whitey's last words; some one shoved the muzzle of a gun

against his temple, and he fell by the side of Casey.

No sure list of dead and wounded for that evening's battle of the Stag

will ever be compiled. The guests scattered like a flock of blackbirds.

Some fled limping and groaning, others nursing an injured arm, while

three or four, too badly hurt to travel, were dragged into nooks of

safety by friends who'd come through untouched. There was blood to the

east, blood to the west, on the Twenty-eighth Street pavements, and a

wounded gentleman was picked up in Broadway, two blocks away. The

wounded one, full of a fine prudence and adhering strictly to gang

teachings, declared that the bullet which had struck him was a bullet of

mystery. Also, he gave his word of honor that, personally, he had never

once heard of the Stag.

When the police reached the field of battle--wearing the ill-used airs

of folk who had been unwarrantably disturbed--they found Casey and

Whitey Dutch dead on the floor, and Fog-eye groaning in a corner. To

these--counting the injured Brother Bill and the prudent one picked up

in Broadway, finally identified as Sanky Dunn--rumor added two dead and

eleven wounded.

Leoni?

The Central Office dicks who met that lamp of loveliness the other

evening in Broadway reported her as in abundant spirits, and more

beautiful than ever. She had received a letter from McTaffe, she said,

who sent his love, and her eyes shone like twin stars because of the joy

she felt.

“Mack always had a good heart,” said Leoni.

Paper-Box Johnny--all in tears--bore sorrowful word of her loss to Mrs.

Casey, calling that matron from her slumbers to receive it. Paper-Box

managed delicately.

“It's time to dig up black!” sobbed Paper-Box; “they've copped Phil.

“Copped Phil?” repeated Mrs. Casey, sleepily. “Where is he?”

“On a slab in the morgue. Youse'd better chase yourself over.”

“All right,” returned Mrs. Casey, making ready to go back to bed, “I

will after awhile.”

The Apaches of New York · 第 14 / 24 题