"We are, as you may know," Clare continued giving Vivian a dark look,
"Trisexual symbiotes. You do not have any analogous situation among
mammals on Terra."
I glanced at Thais. "We sure haven't," she said with feeling. "But it
sounds _fabulous_."
"It is not, I assure you," Clare said running a four-fingered hand over
his scaly crest in what I took to be a Venerian gesture of distraction.
"We are not _married_ as you people understand the term--"
"Not married," I wrote, underscoring it heavily.
"But your law enforcement agencies insist that our symbiosis is
analogous to marriage and therefore subject to the regulations
governing that odd institution."
"What a bore," Thais said helpfully.
"Our problem is this. The three of us live in what you might roughly
call a connubial state. We--what is your word?--co-inhabit?--"
"That's close," I said.
"We live together, that is. But more than eroticism is involved, I
assure you."
"Of course." Now it began to sound like most of my other cases and I
could get my teeth into it.
"You seem doubtful," the Venerian said with a sharp-toothed frown.
"Let me reiterate that what I say is so. The three of us have spent a
_ygith_ together--that is more than fourteen of your long years. But
now the _ygith_ is over and we must seek another--how would you say
it?--liaison?"
"This is essential?" I asked. "Not just a whim?" It is, you see, the
duty of a Legal Eagle to make every effort to save a marriage. In view
of the circumstances, I felt that surely this was a marriage unique and
therefore _worth_ saving.
"No whim," declared Clare emphatically. "Each _ygith_--or what you
Terrestrials would call 'mating period'--we must uh--realign. If we do
not, deleterious effects are certain. Our health goes bad. We may even
die."
"My friends," I said, "you have very little to worry about. There
are many similar cases here on Terra. Just last week, for example,
a divorce was granted in the case of Nork vs. Nork wherein it was
established that the plaintiff, Mr. Nork was allergic to _Mrs._ Nork.
A simple case, and not the first of its kind. I myself tried one such
case wherein a wife broke out in a rash whenever her husband sought to
question her about the household expenses. A divorce was granted on the
grounds of basic incompatibility."
"Ah," Clare said sadly. "If it were only that simple. Our two
correspondents, Gail and Evelyn, are ready to enter the realignment.
But--" and here the Venerian glared at the smallest of the trio.
"_this_ ungrateful wretch is unwilling to adjust to the changed
circumstances."
Great tears formed in Jean's slotted eyes. "How can you speak that way
to me? After we've been through so much together?"
"Now, now--" Thais, who has a very soft heart, patted Jean in an effort
to make he she or it feel better.
"Get to the point, Clare," Vivian said testily.
"It is our understanding that property held in joint tenancy by
two contesting parties in a divorce case may be distributed at the
discretion of the court."
"That's correct," I said.
"We contend, therefore, that Jean--" Clare pointed a scaly finger at
the small Venerian, "is community property. Vivian's and mine. We wish
to make an agreement between us for the disposal of it--"
"Wait a _minute_," I said, shocked. "I don't think you understand the
community property laws at all. Jean is, by definition, a person. A
person cannot be considered property or chattel. Oh, no--"
The small Venerian made a face at them. "I told you you couldn't get
away with it," she said. "This isn't Venus, you know."
"On Venus you would be property," declared Vivian. And to me,
he--she--I still get confused about this--added: "My sex was
emancipated thirty _ygiths_ ago at home. But Jean's is still
considered--what did you call it?--chattel. No vote. No rights. Nothing
but symbiosis."
"And Clare's is still the--uh--dominant one?" I asked hesitantly.
"That's the myth that's perpetrated," Clare declared acidly. "We
_guths_ do most of the work, if that means anything."