THE CONVERTIBLE SAUSAGE MACHINE.
Jack and Tom arrived at the brink of the lake just as the two
combatants, sputtering and splashing like a pair of grampuses, arose to
the surface.
“It’s Jupe!” cried Jack, “but how in the name of time?”
“But who is the other fellow?” shouted Tom.
“Never mind that now. Jupe can’t swim and the water is deep there.
We’ve got to get him out.”
The boys speedily stripped off their coats and kicked off their shoes
preparatory to plunging to the rescue, but before they could do this,
young Dill, who was a good swimmer, had seized Jupe by the back of the
neck and dragged him, half drowned, to the shore. Jupe, dripping with
water and mud, clambered out little the worse, except in appearance,
for his adventure.
He was followed by young Dill, who was a sorry-looking object indeed.
The water had caused the gaudy dye of his vest to run in great streaks
down his light-colored pants. His hat, which had stuck to his head
throughout the struggle, was sending streams of green water down over
his rubicund face, while round his feet, as he emerged from the lake
and stood before the boys, was a crimson puddle. The dye on young
Dill’s socks was certainly not of the “fast” variety, except in color.
At the sight of the two extraordinary figures Jack and Tom could hardly
refrain from bursting into roars of laughter. But they retained their
gravity and looked sternly at Jupe.
“Perhaps you will explain what this means?” began Jack.
“Ah-ah-ah-ah,” sputtered Jupe, opening and shutting his mouth like a
fish newly removed from the water.
“Well, we are waiting,” said Jack, while Tom turned away, suddenly
overcome by a mysterious fit of coughing.
“Vait idt a minutes undt I vill explanation idt to you,” volunteered
young Dill. “Dis is der vay idt vosn’t. I vos comin’ py der house to
see der Poy Inventors undt I asked idt ob dis black----”
Jupe suddenly came to life. Shaking his woolly head like a poodle he
shouted out:
“Don’ you alls done go fer ter call me no black feller,” he shouted.
“You no call idt to me Dutchman, I no call idt to you black fellers,
aber no mans call me Dutchman.”
“Wait a minute! Wait a minute! What’s all this about?” demanded Jack.
“How are we to understand anything with all this jabber? You there,
Mister----”
“Dill is mein name, sir,” said the young German with a dignity which
assorted oddly with his weird appearance.
“Well, Mr. Dill, you appear to be in a pickle,” said Jack with a grin
he could not repress. “Will you explain to me what was the cause of all
this?”
“Ah-ah-ah,” began Jupe again, but Jack shook his head at him and the
voluble young Dill told the story of the causes leading to the combat.
“Well, you both appear to have been well punished,” said Jack when he
concluded, “and now perhaps you will tell me what you wanted to see us
about.”
“Vot I vanted to see you abodt ain’d it?” asked the German boy.
“Yes.”
“I vanted to see idt der Poy Inventors alretty.”
“Well, you see them.” Young Dill’s face showed his astonishment, but he
wisely repressed any comment. “What can we do for you?”
“You can do me for a fine inventions vot I haf,” responded the
German youth. “I used to vurk midt a delicatessens pefore I pecome
an inventors. I haf midt me in dis liddle satchel a motel of mein
inventions.”
“Well, what is it? What is the nature of it?” demanded Jack.
“Idt iss a new kindt of sissage machine,” explained the proud youth,
forgetting all about his recent immersion in the glow of the inventor’s
enthusiasm, “chust py touching a lefer idt vill make bolognas,
frankfurters, liebervurst, or any oder kindt of sissage dot is alretty.
Vot you dink of him?”
“Huh!” grunted Jupe aside, “ah’s seed lots ob crazy inventors sense ah
wourk hyah, but dis am de fustest sausage machine inventor dot I ebber
clapped mah ole eyes on.” He stared at young Dill as if he had been a
natural curiosity of some sort.
Jack bit his lip hard to keep from laughing. As for Tom, he exploded
into a roar of laughter which he could not restrain. Young Dill looked
bewildered.
“I seel idt to you der Dill Convertible Sausage Machine for fif’
dousandt tollars!” he exclaimed with the air of a person making an
unheard-of offer.
“I am sorry, Mr. Dill,” said Jack, with exemplary gravity, “but we
couldn’t handle your invention if you made a much cheaper price on it.
However, you can no doubt dispose of it elsewhere.”
“Ugh! Yo’ alls better try er butcher shop, Dutchy,” muttered Jupe, “an’
ef dey don’ want it dere take it to a crazy house; maybe they kin use
it and yo’ alls, too.”
“Budt don’d you tink idt iss a goodt inventions?” persisted young Dill.
“Excellent! Fine!” declared Jack, with a side wink at Tom. “But we
couldn’t handle it at all. And now, Mr. Dill, we’ll have to say good
morning. We are very busy. I’m sorry for what happened, but really you
know you brought it partly on yourself.”
“Himmel! oder you hadt bought idt my convertible sissage machine I
vould nodt haf cared if I hadt been drowned all over,” declared young
Dill.
With a melancholy face he gathered up his little wicker satchel. The
boys were turning away when a sudden idea entered the young German’s
head. His face became irradiated with a ray of hope.
“I haf idt here a motel of der convertible sissage machine,” he said,
“aber you dakes me py der house I show you how to make bolognas,
frankfurters, lieber----”
“It wouldn’t be of the least use, Mr. Dill, you’d only be wasting your
time,” said Jack. “Excuse us now, please, we must hurry off.”
The young German was left standing alone on the gravel walk in the
midst of his rubicund puddle. He looked after the retreating figures
of the two boys and Jupe with a melancholy countenance. But he was
gratified none the less to observe that Jupe appeared to be getting
what is commonly known as a “calling down.”
“So dey don’d vant idt der convertible sissage machines,” he muttered.
“Vell dey don’d know dot dey let a fortune slip through dere fingers
der same as sissage slip through my machine, ain’d idt.”
His eyes fixed themselves on Jupe’s humbled figure.
“Chust der same,” he muttered in a low tone, “midt vun handt I can lick
you--nigger!”
Having done this justice to his outraged feelings, young Dill wrung the
water out of his coat-tails and set out on the road to Nestorville. He
thought that he had seen the last of High Towers. Had he but known it
he was destined to do the boys a singular service ere long, but as he
trudged along singing “Hi-lee! hi-lo!” to himself in a melancholy voice
he was totally unaware of this.