SUNSHINE AND SHADOW.
Mrs. Bradley, the wife of the market gardener, was a kind-hearted
woman, and William having often been sent to her house with shoes, an
acquaintanceship grew up between them, which, our hero found, turned
out most unexpectedly to his advantage.
As she stood or sat in her place at the corner, surrounded by her
fresh vegetables, for which she had always plenty of customers, she
often found herself in want of some one whom she could trust to carry
a bunch of asparagus or a basket of spinach to some purchaser's house.
From what she had seen of William, she was assured he would do an
errand faithfully; and although he could not come regularly, she often
waited for his appearing rather than trust another. For these little
services she always paid him liberally, and had he been less
conscientious than he was, he might have turned this kindness to
considerable advantage; but his conscience told him he must not
neglect his master's business.
He mentioned this to the good woman, who, seeing its propriety, was
careful only to give him such commissions as he could fulfil without
wasting the time belonging to his employer; her good opinion being
only increased by his scrupulous fear of doing wrong.
Very happy indeed he was to have some money of his own. Mr. Walters,
being somewhat ashamed of his conduct as exhibited before Jem Taylor
and the watchman, had never since asked him what he got from the
customers; but Mrs. Walters often borrowed our hero's change, as she
said,--but which loans were never repaid. William, however, true to
his resolution of adhering to the truth, never denied having money
when she asked him; but, we must confess, he gave it with a pang, for
he wanted his scanty means for a more important purpose, namely, to
feed the hungry. The rule of life to which he was now adhering forbade
him to do evil that good might follow, and knowing that if he received
the money it would not be long in his possession, he would only take a
portion of these earnings, and begged Mrs. Bradley to give the rest to
little Ned Graham, whom he would send to her house.
She inquired who Ned Graham was, and having heard, declared that
"nobody should starve in her neighbourhood; she would not only give
the little boy the pennies, but see after the old woman."
It was only when sent on some errand to the neighbourhood he could
look in on old Mrs. Graham and her grandson; but when he did, his
heart was filled with such joy as made him forget that he had ever
suffered or been sad. The "cup of cold water," given in the spirit of
Him who went about doing good, insures its own reward; he had extended
the sympathy and kindness due by the bond of human brotherhood to
those more destitute than himself, and he found himself blessed. The
cold looks and cheerless meal that awaited him on his return home, had
now no power to dim the cheerful light of his soul; and when he lay
down on his hard pallet, and slept as only childhood can sleep,
dreams, born of the holy duty which had that day been performed,
hovered around his pillow, shedding an influence not less bright than
had been his waking joy.
Although, the prevailing temper of his mind was peace, its rule was by
no means steady; many a cloud alternated with his sunshine, many a
trial awoke the natural spirit, and many a temptation enticed him to
sin. But in his Bible, now never neglected, he found not only a
buckler that made him proof against every besetment, but experienced
that each promise there will be found a staff to lean upon, able to
bear our whole weight of sin, of sorrow, and of trial. By the glorious
example of sinless purity, yet of lowly meekness and complete
submission to a Father's will, as exhibited by our blessed Saviour, he
learned to practise the "charity" which "suffereth long," and "beareth
all things;" so that even Mrs. Walters was obliged to acknowledge that
really "Bill was not a bad kind of a boy."
None are, however, free from sin, and the boy had many struggles
against the natural inclination to do evil; he was also often sorely
tempted; but sufficient grace was given by Him who hath promised that
none shall be tempted above what he is able to bear, to make a way of
escape.
The summer of the second year had passed away, and the advance of
autumn had somewhat shortened the days, not, however, yet so much so
as to make it necessary to light up the shop. Jem Taylor always went
away at the close of working hours, and as William was the only one
who boarded with the Walters, he was constantly left alone.
One evening Mr. and Mrs. Walters went out together to a place of
public amusement, and having great confidence in "Bill," although they
treated him most unkindly, they left him in charge of the house.
Taking a seat in the unlighted shop, the lad looked through the open
door on the passers-by, and his heart grew sad at the thought, that
among them all there was no one who cared for him. Naturally of a
gentle and loving spirit, he longed for suitable companionship on
which he might lavish his wealth; but, except the Burtons, with whom
he could spend but little time, there was no one from whose influence
gleams of sunshine could steal in upon his heart and cheer its
desolation. "I have always heard it said," was his musing thought,
"that if one were kind and affectionate, he would be sure to receive
love in return. I do all I can to please Mr. and Mrs. Walters, but I
am certain I shall never be able to win their love, and I am _so_
lonesome."
By this time the twilight had deepened almost into night, rendering
objects nearly indistinct. The passing crowd had gradually grown less,
but our hero neither noticed the increasing gloom nor the comparative
quiet of the street, until aroused by the sound of music. Some German
street musicians still abroad were playing the sweet and touching air,
"Why, O why, my heart, this sadness?" and the sounds awoke a different
train of meditation. How often had he heard that strain at home, and
now, how vividly the happy scenes of the once happy times enjoyed
there came up before him! The poverty, privation, toil, and sorrow
borne there, lost half their magnitude; every joy was reflected back
ten-fold. He felt as does some sailor on a stormy sea, and looked back
to its shelter from the jealousies, trials, and turmoils of the world,
as the storm-tossed mariner would have regarded the quiet haven he had
left for ever; the recollection of all that had once been his within
those humble walls was too much for his lately acquired heroism; the
long-sealed fountain was opened, and he wept as he had not done for
many months.
It was not until the music died faintly down the long street that he
recovered his calmness. The tears, however, had proved salutary; and
when he wiped them away he felt but the more resolute in his
determination to do right, let the sacrifice cost what it might, than
ever. "I will be contented," was his mental resolve, "I will endeavour
to grow up good and useful, trying to fulfil worthily the duties
required by my heavenly Father. I have murmured much; a good, faithful
servant does his master's will _cheerfully_, but I have not done so."
Something rubbing against his feet disturbed his train of thought.
What could it be? He looked down to discover, and in the dim and
uncertain light saw a small object moving about on the floor. Again it
came near: first a gentle mewing, then a low purring sound was heard;
and next, something, which he knew at once was a kitten, jumped up
into his lap, and, as if glad to have found a resting-place, nestled
down to take a comfortable nap.
This movement, however, was not at once permitted; for gently removing
the little intruder, he lighted the gas in order to see what kind of
feline specimen had thus come voluntarily to seek his acquaintance.
The little animal's appearance was greatly in its favour; there were
many cats in the neighbourhood, some of them frightened-looking and
half-starved creatures, but this was a beautiful little grey and white
kitten, which had evidently been some one's favourite, for it was very
tame, and had a blue ribbon tied round its neck. But what was he to do
with it? Mrs. Walters, he knew, was a sworn enemy to cats and dogs,
and, had opportunity been allowed, would have waged a war of
extermination against both races. He dared not keep it, and yet how
could he resolve to drive it out into the street, where it would be
sure to be killed? "The poor thing has strayed from home," said he to
himself; "I wish I knew what I ought to do; stay--if I keep and feed
it with the milk I get every day for Mrs. Walters, that will be no
better than stealing; and if I tell her it is here, she will drown it.
I wonder if Mrs. Burton would like to have it; but, indeed, I would
like to keep it myself, I am often so lonesome. But I will get Thomas
to try and find out who it belongs to, and tell them--"
He could not finish the sentence, for he was still hesitating as to
what was the line of duty. The little creature, however, pleaded its
own cause. As he took it up and petted it, it nestled up close to his
cheek, and mewed gently, as if uttering a petition for mercy. William
could not resist the appeal. Right or wrong he must keep it; so he
carried it up to his garret, and covered it up in his bed, after which
he returned to the shop to resume his watch, and think how his kitten
was to be cared for--and, far more important, how he was to coax Mrs.
Walters into a cessation of hostilities against the feline tribe, at
least so far as to tolerate the little wanderer.
His uncle and aunt arrived in due time,--the lady in high good humour,
which our hero thought it a pity to disturb by mentioning the presence
of an unwelcome guest. He would tell her in the morning; but when the
morning came, she was in such an angry mood that, as he was well
aware, no benevolence was to be expected from her then. However, the
kitten must be fed, and to do this he was prepared. He found an old
bowl, which had been put in the garret with some cracked crockery.
This he took along when sent on his daily errand for milk for the
family, and, having a penny or two in his pocket, he told Mrs. Burton
about his kitten, and asked if she would not sell him some every day.
Pleased with the conscientiousness which prompted the boy to buy food
for his favourite rather than take a crumb from his employers without
their permission, she told him he might keep his pennies, for she
would give him a little milk every day for his cat. "But, Billy dear,"
she added, "you had better tell Mrs. Walters all about it. Do
everything open and above-board. Don't be ashamed or afraid of
anything but sin. She must find it out at last, and will be more angry
with you for hiding the matter. Always come straight out with the
truth; you will find it the right way in the end."
The old watchman promised to try to find the owner of the kitten, at
the same time advising our hero either to tell Mrs. Walters the truth,
or bring the little animal to his house, as his wife, he said, "had
quite a fancy for four-footed pets."
William, however, could not at once decide to part with his new
acquaintance, since he felt certain that in either case parting must
be the consequence. His indecision, however, was attended with a more
speedy result than he anticipated, and not less painful than sudden.
He had kept the kitten a few days, but in those few days he had
learned to love the little thing dearly. Its graceful gambols amused
him; and whatever might have been the kind of home from which it had
strayed, it certainly showed itself as happy in the boy's rude
garret-room as it could have been anywhere. As every day increased his
attachment for the playful creature, so every day made the duty of
telling Mrs. Walters of its presence or giving it to Mrs. Burton the
harder. He had at length nearly resolved to do the latter, when an
incident occurred which showed him how necessary it was always to be
prompt in the discharge of duty.
One day Mrs. Walters had occasion to search for something in an old
chest which stood in William's room; and the poor kitten, never
dreaming what an enemy was near, crept forth from its hiding-place in
the bed, and began fearlessly to gambol around one who had no kindly
sympathies to awaken. As she looked round to see if she could discover
from whence the intruder came, she espied, in a corner, the old bowl
still half full of milk, and a few crumbs of bread beside it, and was
at once assured that William had brought the cat from some place--thus
outraging her authority and braving her prejudices.
There was but one course for a nature like hers to pursue. She saw no
beauty in the graceful limbs, neither had she any respect for the
mysterious principle of life--that gift which none but the great
Creator can bestow, and cared not how recklessly she destroyed it.
Burning with anger against our hero, she snatched up the unconscious
kitten and descended to the shop, where, finding no one but Taylor and
the object of her present wrath, she poured out a volley of reproaches
with a rapidity which excluded all possibility of being answered.
Both were too much startled to attempt to speak; indeed there was but
little time allowed, for, even during the first ebullition of fury,
she advanced to the open door and flung the unhappy kitten as far as
she could into the street. This seemed to satisfy her, for she at once
left the shop, and very soon after was seen going down the street.
William, by this sudden movement, was thrown completely off his guard,
and anger, fierce and violent anger at such an outrage, took
possession of his soul. Well was it for him that time was not allowed
him to speak, for he would have uttered words afterwards greatly to be
regretted. A few moments, however, were sufficient to quell the
tempest. "Doest thou well to be angry?" were the words that arose
first to his mind; and with them came also thoughts of One who taught,
"Resist not evil," nor render railing for railing. But why should such
cruelty have been shown to the poor kitten? and the thought that
perhaps he had done wrong in keeping it without Mrs. Walters'
permission gave him great pain. If so, he was content to bear any
outpouring of her wrath without endeavouring to excuse himself; but
still, he was determined to tell her how he had procured the milk for
his kitten, lest she should think him a thief.
As he sat bending over his work, one tear after another fell upon the
leather he was hammering, and his evident distress awoke the
compassion of Jem Taylor, who, as we have already said, was not
hard-hearted, and was always ready to pity the poor boy, who suffered
daily under the iron rule of those who cared not for the happiness or
misery which were in their keeping. We cannot follow the journeyman
very far through life, but let us hope that the mercy which is
extended unto all reached unto him, and taught him how evil were his
ways. The time, however, was not now. The law of God had not been
impressed on his heart in childhood; he looked upon lying as a venial
offence, and had never learned that "no one who worketh abomination or
maketh a lie shall dwell in the city of which God is the glory and the
light." Happy was it for our poor hero that the good seed had been
sown early and prayerfully by his humble but pious parents; but for
this he must have fallen before the tempter.
Mr. Walters had gone out to purchase leather, and the time was
favourable for the thoughtless journeyman to pour in the poison so
well calculated to destroy the soul. "That's a terrible tempered
woman, Bill," said he, "and if I was in your place I would run away.
How she did pitch your poor cat into the street! If it had been mine,
I tell you, I would teach her better in future: instead of sitting
there and crying like a great baby, I would plan how I could help
myself. Why could not you have told her you did not know anything
about the cat? Cats run about everywhere; and where people are so hard
as old Walters and his wife, a little lying is no harm. It is very
silly in you always to tell the truth. The old man, indeed, does not
ask you for your money now; but when she wants to borrow it, you never
tell her you have none, although any one can see you do not like to
give it. Now, quit being such a fool, and take care of number one. I
can tell you of a variety of ways in which you can cheat her."
William sat opposite to the tempter, but did not once raise his eyes
to meet those he felt were resting upon him. He trembled. It was
almost beyond the power of childish resolution to resist the dark
power that was ready to impose a bond which would have sealed his
ruin; but he had learned too much of the true wisdom taught in the
Bible to surrender willingly to the influence of evil. He felt the
weakness of his own heart, but knew also from whence only help could
come. He continued to work in silence at the shoe he was making, but
at the same time he lifted up his heart in prayer: "Heavenly Father,
suffer me not to be led into temptation," was the fervent petition
which issued from the secret chamber of the inner shrine; and He who
seeth in secret heard and answered.
Jem Taylor, mistaking his silence for assent, went on: "You have it
harder than any 'prentice boy I ever saw. Not a chap in all New York
would put up with such victuals as you get; and then to be rated and
called a thief because you stole a drop of milk for the poor kitten,
was too outrageous! Such people as these deserve nothing better than
to have lies told them every hour in the day; and, besides, I would
help myself to whatever I could find in the cupboard,--pay yourself,
boy, for the money the old woman borrows."
"O my dear mother!" thought William, "when you so often told me of the
temptations I should meet with in the world, I could hardly believe
it; but now I know what it is to be tempted, and that if left to
myself I must fall."
Finding he still did not answer, Jem, nowise discouraged, went on: "A
day or two since, when the old woman went to market, she forgot the
key of the cupboard and left it in the lock, and the door swung most
invitingly open. There was a cut pie and a plate of cakes. I told you
to go quickly and help yourself, for no one would see you, and I would
not tell. It was but fair you should take the worth of your money; but
you were too great a blockhead. You looked at the good things there,
and came away empty-handed. Strange, you would steal milk for the cat,
and scruple to take a cake (which, I am sure, you earn hardly enough)
for yourself."
William now raised his eyes, and as he looked straight into the face
of Jem Taylor, the latter could not bear the bright and radiant holy
expression lent them by the influence of truth, with which his soul
was filled. It was now his turn to look down and work in silence,
while the boy was speaking.
"Jem," said he, "I did not steal the milk; I told Mrs. Burton about
the kitten, and she gave it to me. And when you wanted me to take the
cakes, you did say that no one would see me, and that you would not
tell. I steal, Jem! No, I could not steal if I were starving; for
although assured that no man saw me, where could I go to escape the
searching eye of God? I saw the closet open, and the way clear, but I
felt no wish to take what was not my own; I was hungry, and the pie
tempting, but my conscience, like a strong man, held me back. No, Jem,
my mother told me that our heavenly Father numbers every hair of our
heads, and I will never run away, lie, nor steal; and no distress
shall make me willingly wander from the right path; living or dying, I
will try to keep all his commandments, and leave all my affairs to Him
who cannot do wrong."
Oh, glorious and holy majesty of truth! who can resist its power? and
now the journeyman, although ashamed to meet the glance of a child
whose principles were based upon the law of Him who is the Truth,
recognised its beauty and its force. He was addicted to low and base
pursuits and pleasures, but the signature impressed originally on the
heart of man, although half effaced, was not entirely obliterated, and
he shrank back as from a superior power; for he felt as if a child had
been commissioned to judge and condemn him.
A certain eloquent writer has said, "Every one is a missionary for
good or evil, whether he designs it or not; he may be a blot,
radiating a dark influence over the society to which he belongs; or he
may be a blessing, spreading light and benediction over his own
circle,--but a blank no one can be!" And the two we have been
describing belonged to these classes; one was the leaven that sours or
corrupts, the other the salt that silently operates; each was
performing a mission for eternity. Which one, dear young reader, was
to meet approval or endure judgment in that great day when all shall
stand before the judgment-seat? How long the better emotion which had
been created in the heart of Jem Taylor lasted, we cannot tell; he
began to talk on other matters, and for a long time there was no more
temptation from that quarter.
Mr. Walters came in soon afterward, and having heard of the affair,
was ready to renew the strife with our poor hero; but as Thomas
Burton, making a most opportune visit, bore testimony to the truth of
our hero's story, no further punishment than the loss of the cat was
deemed necessary.