At one time, when Lincoln and Douglas were “stumping” Illinois, they
met at a certain town, and it was agreed that they would have a joint
debate. Douglas was the first speaker, and in the course of his talk
remarked that in early life, his father, who, he said, was an excellent
cooper by trade, apprenticed him out to learn the cabinet business.
This was too good for Lincoln to let pass, so when his turn came to
reply, he said:
“I had understood before that Mr. Douglas had been bound out to learn
the cabinet-making business, which is all well enough, but I was not
aware until now that his father was a cooper. I have no doubt, however,
that he was one, and I am certain, also, that he was a very good one,
for (here Lincoln gently bowed toward Douglas) he has made one of the
best whiskey casks I have ever seen.”
As Douglas was a short heavy-set man, and occasionally imbibed, the pith
of the joke was at once apparent, and most heartily enjoyed by all.
On another occasion, Douglas made a point against Lincoln by telling
the crowd that when he first knew Lincoln he was a “grocery-keeper,” and
sold whiskey, cigars, etc.
“Mr. L.,” he said, “was a very good bar-tender!” This brought the laugh
on Lincoln, whose reply, however, soon came, and then the laugh was on
the other side.
“What Mr. Douglas has said, gentlemen,” replied Lincoln, “is true
enough; I did keep a grocery and I did sell cotton, candles and cigars,
and sometimes whiskey; but I remember in those days that Mr. Douglas was
one of my best customers.”
“I can also say this; that I have since left my side of the counter,
while Mr. Douglas still sticks to his!”
This brought such a storm of cheers and laughter that Douglas was unable
to reply.
“FIXED UP” A BIT FOR THE “CITY FOLKS.”
Mrs. Lincoln knew her husband was not “pretty,” but she liked to have
him presentable when he appeared before the public. Stephen Fiske, in
“When Lincoln Was First Inaugurated,” tells of Mrs. Lincoln’s anxiety
to have the President-elect “smoothed down” a little when receiving a
delegation that was to greet them upon reaching New York City.
“The train stopped,” writes Mr. Fiske, “and through the windows immense
crowds could be seen; the cheering drowning the blowing off of steam of
the locomotive. Then Mrs. Lincoln opened her handbag and said:
“‘Abraham, I must fix you up a bit for these city folks.’
“Mr. Lincoln gently lifted her upon the seat before him; she parted,
combed and brushed his hair and arranged his black necktie.
“‘Do I look nice now, mother?’ he affectionately asked.
“‘Well, you’ll do, Abraham,’ replied Mrs. Lincoln critically. So he
kissed her and lifted her down from the seat, and turned to meet Mayor
Wood, courtly and suave, and to have his hand shaken by the other New
York officials.”