I suppose you are right about that," said Jacob Wade, the newly elected
sheriff of Gullmore county, as he and Colonel Moseby Allen sat in the
office of that shrewd and courteous official. "I suppose it makes
no difference which one of us takes this money and pays the
contractors,--we are both under good bonds, you know."
"Certainly, Wade, certainly," put in the Colonel, "your bond is as good
as they can be made in Gullmore county, and I mean no disrespect to the
Omnipotent Ruler of the Universe when I assert that the whole kingdom
of heaven could not give a better bond than I have. You are right, Wade;
you are always right; you are away ahead of the ringleaders of your
party. I don't mind if I do say so. Of course, I am on the other side,
but it was miraculous, I tell you, the way you swung your forces into
line in the last election. By all the limping gods of the calendar, we
could not touch you!" Colonel Moseby Allen leaned over and patted his
companion on the shoulder. "You are a sly dog, Wade," he continued. "If
it had not been for you we would have beaten the bluebells of Scotland
out of the soft-headed farmers who were trying to run your party. I told
the boys you would pull the whole ticket over with you, but they did
n't believe me. Next time they will have more regard for the opinion of
Moseby Allen of Gull-more." The Colonel burst out into a great roar of
laughter, and brought his fat hand down heavily on his knee.
Jacob Wade, the new sheriff, was a cadaverous-looking countryman, with a
face that indicated honesty and egotism. He had come up from a farm, and
had but little knowledge of business methods in general, and no idea of
how the duties of his office should be properly performed. He puffed
up visibly under the bald flattery of Allen, and took it all in like a
sponge.
"Well," said Wade, "I suppose the boys did sort of expect me to help
them over, and I guess I did. I have been getting ready to run for
a long time, and I aint been doing no fool things. When the Farmers
Alliance people was organizing, I just stayed close home and sawed wood,
and when the county was all stirred up about that there dog tax, I kept
my mouth shut, and never said nothing."
"That 's what you did, Wade," continued the Colonel, rubbing his hands;
"you are too smooth to get yourself mixed up with a lot of new-fangled
notions that would brand you all over the whole county as a crank. What
a man wants in order to run for the office of sheriff is a reputation
for being a square, solid, substantial business man, and that is what
you had, Wade, and besides that you were a smooth, shrewd, far-sighted,
machine politician."
Jacob Wade flushed and grew pompous under this eloquent recital of his
alleged virtues. Allen was handling his man with skill. He was a natural
judge of men, and possessed in no little degree the rare ability of
knowing how to approach the individual in order to gain his confidence
and goodwill.
"No," he went on, "I am not partisan enough to prevent me from
appreciating a good clearheaded politician, no matter what his party
affiliations may be. I am as firm and true to my principles as any of
those high up in the affairs of state. I have been honored by my party
time and again in the history of this commonwealth, and have
defended and supported her policies on the stump, and in the halls of
legislation, and I know a smooth man when I see him, and I honor him,
and stick to him out of pure love for his intelligence and genius."
The Colonel arose. He now felt that his man was in the proper humor to
give ready assent to the proposition which he had made, and he turned
back to it with careless indifference.
"Now, Jacob," he said lowering his voice, "this is not all talk. You are
a new officer, and I am an old one. I am familiar with all the routine
business of the sheriffalty, and I am ready and willing and anxious to
give all the information that can be of any benefit to you, and to do
any and everything in my power to make your term of office as pleasant
and profitable as it can be made. I am wholly and utterly at your
service, and want you to feel that you are more than welcome to command
me in any manner you see fit. By the way, here is this matter that we
were just discussing. I am perfectly familiar with all that business.
I looked after the building for the county, collected all the previous
levies, and know all about the contracts with the builders--just what
is due each one and just how the settlements are to be made,--and I am
willing to take charge of this fund and settle the thing up. I suppose
legally it is my duty to attend to this work, as it is in the nature of
unfinished business of my term, but I could have shifted the whole
thing over on you and gotten out of the trouble of making the final
settlements with the contractors. The levy was ordered during my term,
but has been collected by you, and on that ground I could have washed my
hands of the troublesome matter if I had been disposed to be ugly. But
I am not that kind of a man, Wade; I am willing to shoulder my lawful
duties, and wind this thing up and leave your office clear and free from
any old matters."
Jacob Wade, sheriff of Gullmore county, was now thoroughly convinced
of two things. First, that he himself was a shrewd politician, with
an intellect of almost colossal proportions, and second, that Colonel
Moseby Allen was a great and good man, who was offering to do him a
service out of sheer kindness of heart.
He arose and seized Allen's hand. "I am obliged to you, Colonel, greatly
obliged to you," he said; "I don't know much about these matters yet,
and it will save me a deal of trouble if you will allow me to turn
this thing over to you, and let you settle it up. I reckon from the
standpoint of law it is a part of your old business as sheriff."
"Yes," answered Allen, smiling broadly, "I reckon it is, and I reckon I
ought n't to shirk it."
"All right," said Wade, turning to leave the office, "I 'll just hand
the whole thing over to you in the morning." Then he went out.
The ex-sheriff closed the door, sat down in his chair, and put his feet
on the table. "Well, Moseby, my boy," he said, "that was dead easy. The
Honorable Jacob Wade is certainly the most irresponsible idiot west of
the Alleghany mountains. He ought to have a committee,--yes, he ought to
have two committees, one to run him, and one to run his business." Then
he rubbed his hands gleefully. "It is working like a greased clock," he
chuckled, "and by the grace of God and the Continental Congress, when
this funeral procession does finally start, it wont be Colonel Moseby
Allen of the county of Gullmore who will occupy the hearse."