THE CAMEL'S COMPLAINT
Dorothy ran along until she thought she was quite safe, and then stopped
to look back and listen. There was a confused sound of shouts and cries
in the distance, but nothing seemed to be coming after her, so, after
waiting a moment to get her breath, she walked quietly away through the
wood.
"What a scene of turmoil it was!" she said to herself. (You see, she was
trying to express herself in a very dignified and composed manner, as if
she hadn't been in the least disturbed by what had happened.) "I
presume--" she went on, "I presume it was something like a riot,
although I really don't see what it was all about. Of course I've never
been in a riot, but if it's anything like _that_, I shall never have
anything to do with one";--which certainly was a very wise resolution
for a little girl to make; but as Dorothy was always making wise
resolutions about things that were never going to happen, I really
don't think that this particular one was a matter of any consequence.
She was so much pleased with these remarks that she was going on to say
a number of very fine things, when she came suddenly upon the Caravan
hiding behind a large tree. They were sitting in a little bunch on the
grass, and, as Dorothy appeared, they all put on an appearance of great
unconcern, and began staring up at the branches of the tree, as if they
hadn't seen her.
"They've certainly been doing something they're ashamed of," she said to
herself, "but they can't deceive me with any such behavior as _that_";
and just then the Admiral pretended he had just caught sight of her and
said, with a patronizing air, "Ah! How d' ye do? How d' ye do?" as if
they hadn't met for quite a while.
"You know perfectly well how I do, and I consider that a very foolish
remark," replied Dorothy, speaking in a very dignified manner, and not
feeling at all pleased with this reception; and then noticing that
Humphrey was nowhere to be seen, she said severely, "Where's your
Camel?"
"Camels is no good," said the Admiral, evasively. "Leastwise _he_
wasn't."
"Why not?" said Dorothy. She said this very sternly, for she felt
morally certain that the Admiral was trying to conceal something from
her.
"Well, you see," said the Admiral, uneasily, "he talked too much. He was
always grumbling."
"Grumbling about what?" said Dorothy.
"Oh, about a wariety of things," said the Admiral. "Meals and lodgings
and all that, you know. I used to try to stop him. 'Cammy,' I says--"
"'Cammy' is short for camel," explained Sir Walter, and Dorothy laughed
and nodded, and the Admiral went on--
"'Cammy,' I says, 'don't scold so much'; but lor! I might as well have
talked to a turnpike-gate."
"Better," put in Sir Walter. "_That_ shuts up sometimes, and _he_ never
did."
"Oh, jummy!" said the Highlander, with a chuckle, "_that's_ a good one!"
"But what was it all about?" persisted Dorothy.
"_You_ tell her, Ruffles," said the Admiral.
"Well," said Sir Walter, "it was all the same thing, over and over
again. He had it all in verses so he wouldn't forget any of it. It went
like this:
"Canary-birds feed on sugar and seed,
Parrots have crackers to crunch;
And, as for the poodles, they tell me the noodles
Have chickens and cream for their lunch.
But there's never a question
About MY digestion--
ANYTHING does for me!
"Cats, you're aware, can repose in a chair,
Chickens can roost upon rails;
Puppies are able to sleep in a stable,
And oysters can slumber in pails.
But no one supposes
A poor Camel dozes--
ANY PLACE does for me!
"Lambs are inclosed where it's never exposed,
Coops are constructed for hens;
Kittens are treated to houses well heated,
And pigs are protected by pens.
But a Camel comes handy
Wherever it's sandy--
ANYWHERE does for me!
"People would laugh if you rode a giraffe,
Or mounted the back of an ox;
It's nobody's habit to ride on a rabbit,
Or try to bestraddle a fox.
But as for a Camel, he's
Ridden by families--
ANY LOAD does for me!
"A snake is as round as a hole in the ground,
And weasels are wavy and sleek;
And no alligator could ever be straighter
Than lizards that live in a creek.
But a Camel's all lumpy
And bumpy and humpy--
ANY SHAPE does for me!"
Now, Dorothy was a very tender-hearted little child, and by the time
these verses were finished she hardly knew whether to laugh or to cry.
"Poor old, feeble-minded thing!" she said, compassionately. "And what
became of him at last?"
There was a dead silence for a moment, and then the Admiral said
solemnly:
"We put him in a pond."
"Why, that's the most unhuman thing I ever heard of in all my life!"
exclaimed Dorothy, greatly shocked at this news.
[Illustration: THE CARAVAN DISCIPLINE THE CAMEL.]
"Well," said the Admiral, in a shamefaced sort of way, "_we_ thought it
was a good thing to do--for us, you know."
"And _I_ call it proud and unforgiving," said Dorothy, indignantly.
"Did the poor creature say anything?"
"Not at first," said the Admiral; "but after he got in he said things."
"Such as what?" said Dorothy.
"Oh, we couldn't make out _what_ he said," replied the Admiral,
peevishly. "It was perfectly unintellijibbergibble."
"Kind of gurgly," put in the Highlander.
"Did he go right down?" inquired Dorothy, very anxiously.
"Not a bit of it," said the Admiral, flippantly. "He never went down at
all. He floated, just like a cork, you know."
"Round and round and round," added Sir Walter.
"Like a turnip," put in the Highlander.
"What do you mean by _that_?" said Dorothy, sharply.
"Nothing," said the Highlander, looking very much abashed; "only I
thought turnips turned round."
Dorothy was greatly provoked at all this, and felt that she really ought
to say something very severe; but the fact was that the Caravan looked
so innocent, sitting on the grass with their sunbonnets all crooked on
their heads, that it was as much as she could do to keep from laughing
outright. "You know," she said to herself, "if it wasn't for the
Highlander's whiskers, it'd be precisely like a' infant class having a
picnic; and after all, they're really nothing but graven images"--so she
contented herself by saying, as severely as she could:
"Well, I'm extremely displeased, and I'm very much ashamed of all of
you."
The Caravan received this reproof with great cheerfulness, especially
the Admiral, who took a look at Dorothy through his spy-glass, and then
said with much satisfaction: "Now we're each being ashamed of by _three_
persons"; but Dorothy very properly took no notice of this remark, and
walked away in a dignified manner.