likely to learn these truths naturally and without instruction than city
children. The answer is that they are more likely to learn the facts,
but knowing the facts is by no means understanding the subject; and
whether knowledge of the facts is good or bad for the child depends
entirely upon the impression it makes upon him. Undoubtedly the country
child is in a better position to receive instruction, but whether this
instruction tends to refine his feelings and elevate his heart depends
altogether upon how it is given. Probably the average country boy has no
more spiritual conception of the matter than the average city boy,
though he may have a more wholesome and, so to speak, utilitarian
thought of it. His interest at least reaches out to results, for the
successful multiplication of the stock on the farm may be a matter of
vital importance to him.
The extension of knowledge from the bird to the mammal may be made
through the medium of the family pets. Fido, puss, the pet rabbits, or
squirrels may serve to elucidate the subject. Indeed, at this stage the
well-instructed child himself will be ready to give all the essential
facts, and will feel free to ask questions concerning the facts he does
not understand. If he has traced the continuity of the egg from the
flower to the bird it will not be difficult for him to realize that even
the higher animal has its origin in the same way. The mother can very
reverently explain to him that the cat too has ovaries; that from these
develop ova which are few in number and need very special care. They
cannot be laid in a nest like the bird's egg. They are very tiny, no
larger than the head of a small pin, and they have no hard shell.
It is their destiny to remain in the oviduct and develop. That is,
instead of being born like the bird's egg and then being hatched, these
eggs first develop and afterwards are born. But if not fertilized they
would not continue to develop. The cat has two ovaries, which develop at
maturity and ripen the ova, and these pass into the oviducts, which are
tubes like the oviducts of the bird. Here the egg remains a certain
length of time, and then if it is not fertilized it is passed away; but
if it is fertilized a marvellous change takes place in this tiny cell:
it remains within the oviduct and is there supplied with nourishment by
blood-vessels essentially as the flower seed is supplied with food from
the sap. Generally three or five of these ova develop at the same time,
some in one oviduct, some in the other. When these tiny eggs have
developed into kittens strong enough and perfect enough to make
entrance into the world safe, they are born just as the egg is born.
Unlike the oviduct of the bird, which opens into the intestine, these
ducts unite just before the end, and have separate openings of their
own.
As soon as the young are born the mother begins to care for them. For
several weeks they depend upon the milk she secretes for their food, and
upon her constant care and loving watchfulness for their life. The
thought of parental love and care should be much more strongly
emphasized at every step than the mere physical facts, though it is
necessary that they too be clearly comprehended. The sacrifice of the
parent for the child is one of the most universal and unselfish facts of
life, and many stories illustrating it can be collected and told. It is
not necessary to tell them as obviously pointing a moral, yet they
should be told as dramatically and interestingly as possible, that the
child may get a strong impression of this great force. Among mammals it
is true, (but this need not be dwelt upon with the child,) that many
males pay no attention to their offspring; though some, as the cattle,
defend the females and young if a herd is attacked by savage animals, by
putting them in the centre and themselves forming a circle about them.
It is the mother love and care, however, which are here most prominent;
but the child who knows the facts concerning paternity should not be
allowed to forget the great factor of inheritance, and that the
offspring gets its characteristics from the father as well as from the
mother.
There is only one more step to be taken in the _modus operandi_ of
reproduction, and that is in the higher mammal, where the ovum passes
down through a slender oviduct into an enlarged chamber or womb, where
it remains a certain length of time, finally if unfertilized, to pass
away unnoticed; if fertilized, to develop into a young animal which in
time will be born helpless and dependent upon the love and care of the
mother. In some of the higher mammals, as the sheep and the goat, there
are generally two ova developed in the womb at the same time; that is,
twins are born. In the larger ones, as the horse and the cow, but one
ovum generally develops, though the development of two is not uncommon.
As a result of these teachings, which are not formal like school work,
but given as opportunity offers and in as interesting and outreaching a
way as possible, the child learns that all life develops in the same
way. That all life, even human, starts as a tiny ovum. That these tiny
ova are produced in every female by a special tissue called the ovary,
which develops at maturity when the eggs begin to ripen; that if the ova
are not fertilized they do not develop; if they are fertilized they
develop into an individual like the parent, though having personal
peculiarities of its own. The fertilizing cells are produced in every
male from a special tissue, which greatly develops at maturity when the
fertilizing cells are matured and are capable of uniting with the ovum
to produce the new being.
Along with these necessarily material facts the youth is firmly
impressed with the high office of this great function, his thoughts
concerning it are honest and clear, and he understands in a natural way
the necessity for respecting it and guarding it for the good of those
who are to follow. The essential facts the child can well learn before
his own maturity. They seem to him matter-of-fact, like any other
phenomena of life. He does not need to brood over an incomprehensible
and veiled mystery, and the whole subject cannot fail to have a broader
significance, a deeper, wider meaning, a purer influence than it could
have if only the physiological facts relating to his own life came to
his knowledge.
But should one wait for all these intermediate steps before telling the
facts of human life?
That perhaps depends upon the temperament and circumstances of the
parent and the needs of the child. It does not matter much whether the
steps are taken consecutively or not, so long as the child gets a clear
idea of the main facts and connects them in his mind with similar
phenomena in all forms of life. Nor is a great store of knowledge on
the part of the parent necessary. Each will tell in his own way such
facts as he knows, keeping only in mind that he is to impress the child
with the wonder and beauty of reproduction as a means to an end, and as
a universal law working essentially alike in every living thing.
There is something deeper than mere knowing, which the parent wishes to
kindle, like a sacred fire which can never be extinguished, in the soul
of his child. That is, a high reverence for the noble mystery of human
life in its inception, and a deep love for his parents and a profound
faith in them, such a love and reverence that any impulse to subvert the
forces of his own life may be met with successful resistance.
The boy who hears from his mother's lips his first knowledge of his own
origin, who learns from her the full meaning of maternity, its
sacrifices and suffering and the great love that gladly endures all,
suffers all, for the sake of the precious child who is to come to her
arms,--for the young life, his life, that she is to guide and
cherish,--can never enshrine a debased image of womanhood in his heart
of hearts. With some children--and some mothers--this might well be the
child's first introduction to the subject. Afterwards he could be shown
the flower and its seeds, the fish and its eggs, the egg of the bird,
and somewhat later introduced to the pollen of the flower as necessary
to the completing of the wonderful transformation.
Nor will it be difficult in these growing years to instil into the boy
the best elements of chivalry which shall make him a champion for his
mother's sex. He ought to be trained to a certain respect and courtesy
toward girls and women as he grows older, by many devices in the home
life which will suggest themselves to any mother. A feeling of
protection for motherhood can be fostered in the boy through his
relations with the lower animals; many a one has had the truth impressed
upon him by his mother's admonition not to handle kitty roughly or chase
her about too much, as she is carrying under her heart the burden of new
life. Keeping and caring for pets may be a great education to the
growing boy. It interests him in animal life, gives him occupation at
home; and in breeding his pigeons, rabbits, or squirrels his interest in
obtaining good specimens may be an open door to instruction of
inestimable value far beyond pigeons and rabbits.
Again, the boy's pet may by some mothers be found an easy introduction
to the story of the development of the new life, the main stress being
laid upon the care of the little mother, who must be treated with
special kindness and consideration, and must be well fed. Some mothers
encourage the children to save a little of their own milk and cream for
pussy at this time, thus conveying the impression that some sacrifice of
their own comfort is due to the mother who is bearing this extra burden
of life. If the child is curious, the mother can tell him so sacredly
the principal physiological facts that he will go from her feeling as
little inclination to speak carelessly of what he has heard as he would
feel like shouting his prayers aloud in the street.
It will naturally occur to the mother to connect this whole subject
closely with the religious thought of the child; and where this is done
simply and without theology, but as an expression of the great divine
love and foresight that passes like a golden thread through every form
of living creature, it may be exceedingly beautiful and exceedingly
helpful.
It is now time to answer the question, "What is to be done with the
older child who has received little or no preliminary instruction?"
From eleven to fourteen the boy can be told the facts he needs to know
with as much preparatory flower and animal studies as can be made
interesting to him. Everything will depend upon his temperament and the
kind of information he may have already received. He may be interested;
the chances are he will not be, or at least will pretend he is not. In
such a case he must be made to listen, and some such preliminary as the
following will generally attain the required result.
"There are some things that every man must understand rightly. I want to
be sure you understand them, so that you may know the true from the
false, the right from the wrong, and will not show yourself ignorant
before the world."
Generally to be seriously called a man at this age, or invited to enter
the domain of the man, will conquer, and he will listen even though he
may pretend not to. It often happens that the boy entering the "contrary
age" wants above all things to know, and yet is ashamed to listen. It is
generally safer to talk to the boy at this time than to rely wholly upon
books to be read by him. Give him the books by all means but talk them
over with him, supplementing them in any way that seems best. It may be
better for the father to talk to the hitherto uninstructed lad at this
age, but where this is not possible then the mother should see that the
boy has the information he needs, in the most outreaching form she can
bestow it, trying to make him realize the universality of the truth, the
fact that every living thing is subject to essentially the same sex
laws. It is best for him to feel that both parents understand and are
interested in this side of his development, and the mother, even though
the father gives the instruction, may be able to show her son that she
too knows and cares. It will be much less difficult as a rule for the
mother to talk to the girl at this age, and of course there will be many
children, both boys and girls, with whom no difficulty will be
encountered.
With older children, those perhaps from fourteen to eighteen, yet other
methods may need to be pursued. Many youths can be approached without
difficulty, and what they need to know can be explained directly to
them. Whether this is so or not often depends quite as much on the
parent as on the child. Where the mother feels that a direct appeal to
the youth would be injudicious she can sometimes gain his interest by
indirect methods. If there are younger children she can introduce the
subject by saying that she is anxious to have the children instructed
properly in this subject, and that she relies upon him to assist her in
various ways, and particularly by always understanding what she is
doing, and adding the weight of his influence as an older brother. She
can then consult him as to the best way of going to work, explaining
about the botany work and what she hopes to gain by using it, all the
time taking for granted that he knows everything. If he is interested,
she can explain all to him in this way, opening the door to certain
other information she must be sure that he has. Of course she may be
able to relegate all this instruction to the child's father, but if for
any reason this is not possible, the boy must get his help either
directly or indirectly from her; and in any case if it is possible to
associate him with her in the task of enlightening and helping his
younger brothers it may give a certain definiteness of thought on the
subject, and, what is of more importance, a sense of responsibility in
regard to it. It will also help him to a realization of the universal
nature of the manifestation of this side of life. By occasional appeals
to his sympathy and help as time goes on and getting him to read certain
books in order to help her to decide whether they would help the others,
she may be able to do him an incalculable benefit. Even though he may
argue against instruction, that will give an opportunity to put in his
way sources of knowledge, and if he does not feel inclined to read the
books recommended they can be left in his way where he can read them
without being detected, which he will be apt to do. Generally young
people are eager for instruction, though where they have been neglected
and have formed false ideas and ideals they sometimes become perverse,
particularly toward members of their own family. This may often be due
to fear in one form or another, and the wise parent will leave no means
untried to give the youth somehow the help he needs. Many parents feel
it wise to give the youth some good book on the subject suited to his
age, a book of his own which he can keep in his room to consult whenever
he is puzzled or doubtful about his rule of conduct.
XII
VIGILANCE
That the facts concerning the normal reproductive life throughout nature
can be presented in such a way as to create a worthy image in the mind
of the learner there can be no doubt.
The question naturally arises, "Is this enough to insure morality and
personal purity in the youth?" Few knowing the tendency of the age would
hesitate to say most emphatically that it is not enough.
The end in view being to prepare the young soul for the great battle of
life, to put upon it the armor of a knight which shall be borne
untarnished, the first instruction concerning the facts of the
reproductive life may well be impersonal, poetical, beautiful, filling
the mind with sentiment,--not sentimentality,--so that the mental vision
of this side of life shall be one worthy of the glorious mind of man.
To keep the mind of the child wisely impressed with the beauty, the
achievements, of the great reproductive force in nature, which is
directly responsible for every living thing on the earth, is to help
immeasurably toward branding a high instead of a low ideal on his
soul,--an ideal which he cannot lose when he reaches the great climax
that transforms him into an adult capable of reproducing his kind, and
when whatever most powerfully influences him will become a determining
factor in the administration of his whole after life.
Side by side, however, with this illumination of nature's methods should
go the most careful training and watchfulness in the care of the child's
own person,--not that he need connect the two in the least. Later, of
course, he will, and should as time goes on, have the most careful
instruction concerning his own body and its functions. There are a few
simple observances that every human being should learn from childhood,
and learn so thoroughly and so fix as a matter of habit, that he can
never break away from them.
At first the parent attends to the child's wants, later the child must
care for himself; and while he ought not to be burdened with too much
thought of his body, yet there are a few simple rules of hygiene which
he should follow as a matter of habit, and there is one subject upon
which he should be most carefully instructed,--that is, maintaining the
sexual purity of his body. He should be taught from the beginning to
think of his body as the sacred temple of his soul, which it is a sin
against nature and against God to defile. That the child's body be kept
uncontaminated is one of the most priceless gifts his parents can bestow
upon him; the value of this was so keenly felt in antiquity that at a
certain period of Greek supremacy the laws were most stringent
concerning it, a youth sinning against himself being put to death.
There seems to be a growing need of watchfulness over children in this
respect; few who have not looked especially into the matter have any
idea of the prevalence of harmful habits. Sex abuse has been called "the
disease of civilization"; and where it takes firm root, it is
exceedingly disastrous to the life of a nation, not only destroying,
directly or indirectly, individuals, but so weakening the stock that the
whole nation degenerates.
The root of the difficulty perhaps lies in the low ideal of this age on
that subject. Where the ideal is low there can be no hope of a high
result. That the current theories which control the lives of the many in
this direction are false is the conclusion of the best scientific work
of the present times. Where these theories, however, have been bred into
youth for generations, they may to an extent be true simply as a result
of this breeding. Darwin in his "Descent of Man" says: "It is worthy of
remark that a belief constantly inculcated during the early years of
life, whilst the brain is impressible, appears to acquire almost the
nature of an instinct; and the very essence of an instinct is that it is
followed independently of reason."
For the parent, then, to inculcate this quasi instinct against sex abuse
in any form is to give the child the best armor he could possibly have;
and if this could be done for generations, the instinct would not need
such careful fostering, as it would be born more or less developed with
the child.
Every parent of a purely reared child is putting a stone in the
foundation of prosperity for this wonderful new civilization, which will
go on evolving, or die of decrepitude, just as its central dynamic
force, the sex life of the people, finally decides. Sex immorality is,
as every one knows, one of the signs of the approaching death of a
nation.
Few young mothers realize the great need of watchfulness against the
formation of bad habits in even young children. And many make the
mistake of supposing that with children instruction can take the place
of watchfulness. During the early years of a child's life careful
watching as well as careful teaching, is necessary. Nor does the social
grade of the child bring immunity or the reverse. The mother who says to
herself, "Oh, _my_ child would not," does not understand the nature of
the problem. Anybody's child may innocently fall into this error, and
every mother should equip herself with all the information necessary to
guard against this most insidious of all foes and to meet it if it
appears, realizing that watchfulness is necessary almost from the hour
of birth,--even children in the cradle frequently needing attention in
this respect. Every young mother should know that among a certain class
of people, from whom her nurse will likely be drawn, there are many who
have theories most pernicious to the welfare of the child, the nurse
herself not infrequently, through ignorance perhaps, being guilty of
initiating the babe into a course from which it will be most difficult
for him ever to depart. It is not safe to take for granted that any
child does not need a certain amount of watchfulness. The most highly
organized, most "high strung" sensitive natures are among those most in
danger, not only from forming unfortunate habits, but from their
results.
Watchfulness during the early years of the child's life, instruction in
caring for himself, plenty of outdoor exercise, unstimulating food,
sufficient sleep, the cold bath, agreeable occupation, abundant material
for wholesome thought and imagination, will in most cases bring the
child safely to the first great milestone in his life journey, the
period of adolescence.
As the child grows older he should be warned against certain dangers
which may beset him from other vicious or ignorant children; and of
course the child's temperament, his heredity, the weakness or strength
of his desires in the direction of sense pleasures, and the amount of
will-power he possesses will guide the parent in the nature and amount
of such instruction. Some mothers whose children have strong animal
instincts are afraid to instruct them on that account. Such children are
in peculiar need of watchfulness and knowledge, and the right kind of
instruction does not tend to waken the senses. Of course no child should
be sent away to school without an impressive warning against certain
habits all too prevalent among boys in boarding schools. Here it may be
wise to let him know something of what he will be sure to see or hear,
that he may not be taken unawares, puzzled and tempted by things which
to him will seem not to have come within the experience of his parents
if they said nothing to him about them. The boy warned by his parents of
the falsity of the strange doctrines he may hear preached by these
unguided youths will not readily be deluded. The pure but ignorant boy
going for the first time into the new life of the school, looking up to
the older boys with that peculiar veneration the younger boy almost
always feels for the older, moved in his senses by what he hears and
sees, may speedily forget such home warnings as seem vague and
pointless, and he may yield himself to a course most disastrous to his
future.
How can it fail to be the duty of every parent to protect the child
against the chance of making these fatal mistakes through ignorance?
Young people cannot be kept wholly out of reach of temptation, nor would
it be best for them if they could be. Far better is it so to strengthen
the moral fibre that they can resist.
From time to time there appears in our best publications an appeal from
some noted educator for the better instruction of youth at home, and
their almost universal plea is that the youth be told by the mother the
facts needed to give him a reverence for womanhood.
XIII
THE TRANSFORMATION
The most difficult problems of the educator are found in connection with
changes which take place in the child at the age of adolescence or
puberty. This age has never been so carefully and systematically studied
as at the present time, and it is proving an unsuspected key for solving
many puzzling problems of racial evolution as well as of individual
development. Personally it is a time of tremendous stress,--physical,
mental, and moral; the young person who escapes turmoil being the
exception, not the rule.
Certain of the physical changes which occur are familiar to all, but the
deep meaning of these changes is less generally understood. The parent
who has wisely guided the child to this critical period has done much,
but it would be a mistake to suppose that all has now been done that
can be done.