The Topographical Article is so familiar as to need but little
introduction.... Personally, I do not recommend it; it involves a
considerable labour; alone, of all forms of historical writing, it
demands accuracy; alone, it is invariably un-paid.
Nevertheless, there are special occasions when it will be advisable
to attempt it; as--in order to please an aged and wealthy relative;
in order to strike up a chance acquaintance with a great Family; in
order to advertise land that is for sale; in order to prevent the
sale, or to lower the price (in these two last cases it is usual
to demand a small fee from the parties interested); in order to
vent a just anger; in order to repay a debt; in order to introduce
a “special” advertisement for some manure or other; and so forth.
Most men can recall some individual accident when a training in
Topographical Writing would have been of value to them.
There even arise, though very rarely, conditions under which this
kind of writing is positively ordered. Thus, when the Editor of the
_Evening Mercury_ changed his politics for money on the 17th of
September, 1899, all that part of his staff who were unable to drop
their outworn shibboleths were put on to writing up various parts
of London in the legal interval preceding their dismissal, and a
very good job they made of it.
Never, perhaps, were the five rules governing the art more
thoroughly adhered to. A land-owning family was introduced into
each; living persons were treated with courtesy and affection; a
tone of regret was used at the opening of each; each closed with
a phrase of passionate patriotism; and each was carefully run
parallel to the course of English History in general; and the
proper praise and blame allotted to this name and that, according
to its present standing with the more ignorant of the general
public.[11]
It was in this series (afterwards issued in Book form under the
title, _London! My London_) that the following article--which I
can put forward as an excellent model--was the contribution of my
friend, Mr. James Bayley. It may interest the young reader (if he
be as yet unfamiliar with our great London names) to know that
under the pseudonym of “Cringle” is concealed the family of Holt,
whose present head is, of course, the Duke of Sheffield.