III.

I do not design to sketch any Utopia for woman; but there are certain

things which can be done in this world, in this country, in this

generation, at this moment,--simple, practical, practicable measures,

which can be accomplished without any change in laws, without any

palpable revolution or disruption of society, but by which women shall

be relieved of the indignity that is constantly put upon them, even by

the society which considers itself, and which perhaps is, the most

civilized and chivalric in the world.

First, every man who has daughters is either able to support them or

he is not. If he is, he ought to do it in a way that shall make them

feel as little trammelled as possible. He should so treat them, from

first to last, that they shall feel that they are dear and pleasant to

him, his delight and ornament. So far from wishing to be rid of them,

he finds his balm and solace and zest of life in their society, their

interests, and their ministrations. While he contemplates the

contingency of their marriage, and makes what preparations such

contingency may require, it should be well understood that he

contemplates it only as a contingency; and that all his wishes and

hopes will be best met by their happiness, whether it is to be

promoted by a life away from him or with him. If they are so deficient

in amiability, capability, or adaptability that his home cannot be

comfortable with them in it,--that, so far from being a reason why he

should be eager to part with them, is the strongest reason why he

should earnestly endeavor to keep them with him. Almost without fail,

their faults lie at his door; and it is just and right that, if any

home is to be made miserable by them, it should be the one which has

made them _miserific_. On the other hand, if they wish to go from his

roof to follow paths of their own, he ought to aid and encourage them

as far as lies in his power. It matters not that he is able and

willing to supply their every want. He is _not_ able, if they have

immortal wants,--wants which the parental heart and purse cannot

satisfy,--want of activity, want of a plan, want of some work which

shall engage their young and eager energies. However liberal, kind,

and fond he may be, in their father's house their position must be

subordinate, and it may well happen that they shall wish to taste the

sweets of an independent, self-helping, self-directing life. They wish

to feel their own hands at the helm; they wish to know what

responsibility and foresight and planning mean. They are drawn by a

strong, inexplicable attraction in certain directions; and as he

values not only their happiness, but their salvation,--their love for

him, their health of body and mind,--he shall give them ample room and

verge enough. He shall not abate one jot or tittle of fatherly

affection. He shall not attempt to persuade them from their

inclination till he finds persuasion of no avail, and then in a fit of

angry petulance bid them go, and leave them to their own destruction.

He shall give them such aid as can be made available. He shall

surround them with his love, if not with his care. He shall, above

all, show them that his arms are always open to them, if through

weakness or weariness they faint by the way. His sympathy and

protection, and fatherly cherishing, shall be new every morning and

fresh every evening. If they quickly tire in their new paths, they

will come back to him with stronger love and faith. Their life abroad

will have only endeared their happy home. The enlargement of their

experience will have intensified their appreciation of their

blessings. If their call was indeed from above, and their first feeble

explorations opened for them a new world, through which they learn to

walk with ever firmer tread, they will return from time to time to lay

at his feet with unutterable gratitude the treasures which he enabled

them to discover. He will know that he has contributed to the world's

wealth, and his happy children will rise up and call him blessed.

But if they do not incline to such a life, he shall not force them,

however strongly he may be persuaded of its propriety, wisdom, and

dignity. Because they are obliged to grow under the whole

superincumbent weight of society, he must not be severe if they attain

but a partial growth. With boys the preponderance of influence is

overwhelmingly on the side of an active, positive life. With girls, it

is against it. If a boy does not do something in the world, he must

show cause for it; a girl must show cause if she does. Therefore, if

the father is not able, by precept and persuasion, to induce his

daughters to embrace an active life, he must lay it to society, and do

the next best thing by protecting them as far as possible from the

resultant evils of their situation; not quite all to society either,

for, as a general thing, if his own precept and example have been

right, his children will be right; the influence of father and mother,

by its nearness, intensity, and continuity, very often more than

balances the superior bulk of society's influence. Parents say things

which they ought to mean, and which they wish to be considered to

mean, and which they suppose they do mean, but which they are really

the farthest in the world from meaning, and then marvel that their

children should disregard their instructions and go wrong; but such

instructions are but as the dust in the balance. The ideal which they

actually, though perhaps unconsciously, hold up to their children, is

the model upon which the children form themselves. What they are, not

what they say, is the paramount influence. So if a father heartily

believes in womanly work, his daughters will hardly fail to be

woman-workers.

If a father is not able to support his daughters in a manner

compatible with comfort and refinement, he should see to it that they

have some way opened in which they can do it, or help do it, for

themselves, in a manner consistent with their dignity and

self-respect. It is very rarely that a human being is born without

possible power in some one direction. The field which is traversable

to women is much more circumscribed than that which is traversed by

men, yet I have somewhere read a statement that the number of

employments in which women of the United States are actually engaged

is, I think, greater than five hundred. If this is so, or anything

nearly so, men surely have no need to "marry off" their daughters as

an economical measure. Out of five hundred occupations, a woman can

certainly choose one which, though not perhaps that which enlists her

enthusiasm, is yet better than the debasement of herself which an

indifferent marriage necessitates. It is better to be not wholly

well-placed than to be wholly ill-placed. Indeed, there are many

chances in favor of the assumption that she may find even a suitable

employment. Literature and art are open to her on equal terms with

men. Teaching is free to her, with the disadvantage of being

miserably, shamefully, wickedly underpaid, both as regards the

relative and intrinsic value of her work; but this is an arrangement

which does not degrade her, only the men who employ her. Many

mechanical employments she is at perfect liberty to acquire, and the

greater delicacy of her organization gives her a solid advantage over

her masculine competitors. In factories, in printing-offices, and in

all manner of haberdashers' shops, she is quite at home; and this

branch of trade she ought to monopolize, for surely a man is as much

out of his sphere in holding up a piece of muslin at arm's length, and

expatiating on its merits to a bevy of women, as a woman is in the

pulpit or before the mast. Especially do private houses invite her

over all the country. The whole land groans under inefficient domestic

assistance; and if healthy, intelligent, well-behaved American girls

would be willing to work in kitchens which they do not own one half as

hard as most women work in kitchens which they do own, thousands of

doors would fly open to them. There is a foolish pride and prejudice

which rises up against "going out to service." But everybody in this

world, who is not a cumberer of the ground, is out at service. If it

is true service and well performed, one thing is as honorable as

another. The highest plaudit mortal can hope to receive is, "Well

done, good and faithful servant." It is the absence of moral dignity

and character, not, as is often supposed, its presence, which causes

this reluctance. A nobleman ennobles his work. A king among

basket-makers is none the less a king. How women can be so enamored of

the needle as to choose to make a pair of cotton drilling drawers,

with buckles, button-holes, straps, and strings, for four and one

sixth cents, or fine white cotton shirts with fine linen "bosoms" for

sixteen cents apiece, rather than go into a handsome house in the next

street to make the beds, and scour the knives, and iron the clothes

for a dollar and a half a week,[1] besides board and rent, I do not

understand. That so many are ready to brave the din of machinery, and

the smells of a factory for ten hours a day, with only a great,

dreary, unhomelike boarding-house to go to at night, while there are

so very few, if any, who are willing to preside over a comfortable and

plentiful kitchen, with at least a possibility of home comforts,

pleasant association, and true appreciation, is equally inexplicable.

[1] This was written before the advent of high prices. At

present such service would command perhaps twice that sum.

But enough has been said to show, that, if women have a desire, or are

under the necessity, of getting an honest living, ways and means may

be found; not so stimulating, not so lucrative, not so varied as might

be desired, but honest and honorable. Girls, however, make the mistake

of rushing pell-mell into school-houses, as if that were the only

respectable path to independence. I heard a man the other day speaking

about the High School of his native city. It was a good school,--he

had nothing to say against its conduct,--it gave girls a good

education; and yet he sometimes thought it did more harm than good.

Every year a class was graduated, and they were all ladies and did not

want to work, but must all teach, and there were no schools for so

many; what could be done with them? It was an evil that seemed to be

growing worse every year. The implied grievance was, that educated

women were a drug in the market; and the implied remedy, that girls

should be left more uncultivated that they might be turned to commoner

uses. I pass over that accurate knowledge of things shown in the

unconscious contrast between working and teaching,--over the gross

utilitarianism implied in both grievance and redress,--simply

remarking, that, if the excess of supply over demand would justify the

breaking up of High Schools, the domestic education of this generation

should be largely discontinued for the same reason, and that in fact

there seems to be no real and adequate resource, except to manage with

girl babies as you do with kittens, save the fifth and drown the

rest,--to say that girls do very wrong in regarding teaching as the

sole or the chief honorable employment. That occupation is the one for

them to which a natural taste calls them, no matter what may be its

rank in society. In fact, let it not be forgotten that society looks

with a degree of disfavor on any remunerative employment for women. To

be entirely beyond the reach of cavil, they must be consumers, and not

producers; and since, to turn into producers will forfeit somewhat

their caste, let them make capital out of the rural and remote adage,

that one may as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb, and while they are

about it, follow the thing that good is to them. If girls of wealth

and standing, who also possess character and decision, would act upon

their principles when they have them, and follow the lead of their

tastes when their taste leads them into a milliner's shop, or a watch

factory, or a tailor's room, they would do much more than satisfy

their own consciences. They would do a service to their sex, and

through their sex to the other, and so to the whole world, which would

outweigh whatever small sacrifice it might cost them. For the world is

so constituted that to him that hath shall be given. If he have power,

he shall have still more. Those who are independent of the world's

sufferance are tolerably sure to get it. Let a poor girl go to work,

and it is nothing at all. She is obliged to do it, and society does

not so much as turn a look upon her; but let a girl go out from her

brown-stone five-story house, from the care and attendance of

servants, to work for three or five hours a day, because she honestly

believes that the accident of wealth does not relieve her from moral

responsibility, and because, of all forms of labor practicable to her,

that seems the one to which she is best adapted, and immediately there

is a commotion. The brown-stone friends are shocked and scandalized,

which is probably the best thing that could happen to them. Desperate

cases can only be electrified back into life. But it is the first girl

alone that will cause a shock. The second will make but a faint

sensation. The third will be quite commonplace, and when things come

to that pass, that if a woman wishes to do a thing she can do it, and

that is the end of it, there is little more to be desired in that

line.

I know a young lady, the only daughter of a distinguished family, with

abundant means at her command, with parents whose great happiness it

is to promote hers,--a young lady who has only to fancy what a nice

thing it must be to live in a bird's-nest on a tree-top, and

immediately the carpenters come and build her a bower in the tallest

tree that overlooks the sea. This young lady has a strong inclination

to surgery, a most perverted and unwomanly taste, of course; but so

long as it is a womanly weakness to break one's arms, perhaps it is as

well that some woman should be unwomanly enough to set them. At any

rate, there was the taste; nobody put it there, and something must be

done about it. Being the sensible daughter of sensible parents, who

looked upon tastes as hints of powers, instead of disregarding this

hint and devoting her life to her garden, making calls, and a forced

and feeble piano-worship,--all very nice things, but not quite

exhaustive of immortal capacities,--she set herself down to the study

of surgery and medicine. It was no superficial and sensational whim.

Year after year, month after month, week after week, showed no

abatement of enthusiasm. On the contrary, her interest grew with her

growing knowledge. She left without regret, without any weak regrets,

her luxurious home for the secluded and severe student's life, and by

patient and laborious application made herself master of the science.

I look upon her almost as an apostle, though she is very far from

taking on apostolic airs. She quietly pursues the even tenor of her

way as if it were the beaten track. But in doing this she does ten

thousand times more. She opens the path for a host of feet less strong

than hers.

But one great obstacle in the way of woman's attaining strength is her

lack of perseverance. Of the many pursuits possible to women, few are

embraced to any great extent, because girls are said to be, and

probably are, unwilling to bestow upon a trade or a profession the

study and thought which are necessary to insure skill. But this is a

result as well as a cause, and must be removed by the removal of the

cause. Promotion and political preferment shine before a man as a

reward for whatever eminence of character or intelligence he may

attain. His business is a separate department, and dispenses its

separate reward. The first of these is entirely, and the second

partially, wanting to women. A female assistant in a high school, a

woman of education, refinement, accomplishments, tact, and sense,

receives six hundred dollars, and if she stays six hundred years she

will receive no more. A male assistant, fresh from a college or a

normal school, thoroughly unseasoned, without elegance of manners, or

dignity of presence, or experience, teaching only temporarily, with a

view to the pulpit, or the bar, or a professorship, receives a

thousand dollars. His thousand is because he is a man. Her six hundred

is because she is a woman. Her little finger may be worth more to the

school than his whole body, but that goes for nothing. In a certain

"college" I wot of, the "Professors" have a larger salary than the

"Preceptresses," who perform double the amount of labor, and without

any hope of promotion. Female assistants in a grammar school receive

three or four hundred dollars where the male principal has ten or

twelve hundred, and where the difference of salary bears no proportion

to the difference of care and labor. No matter how assiduously they

may devote themselves to their duties, nor how successful they may be

in results, they have attained the maximum. Worse than this: since the

increase of prices consequent upon the war, teachers' salaries have

been increased; but where two hundred dollars have been added to the

salary of the male principal, only twenty-five have been added to

those of the female assistants: so that the man's salary is sixteen

per cent higher, while the woman's is only six per cent higher. This

is done in Massachusetts. One excuse is, that it does not cost a woman

so much to live as it costs a man. It costs a woman just as much to

live as it does a man. If men would be willing to practise the small

economies that women practise, they could live at no greater expense.

There are some things in which women have the advantage; there are

others in which it lies with the man. A woman's calico gown does not

cost so much as a man's broadcloth coat, but her dress, the wardrobe

through, costs just as much as his. He can be decent on just as small

a sum as she. Another excuse is, that men have a family to support. I

suppose, then, that women never have families to support. No female

teacher ever has a widowed mother or an invalid father to assist, or

brothers and sisters to educate. No widow ever had recourse to the

school-room to provide bread for her fatherless children. Or if such

things ever happen, the authorities make adequate provision for it.

The school committee, of course, before it assigns the salary inquires

into these background facts, and acts accordingly. The rich girl has

indeed but a small income from her teaching, but the poor girl is paid

according to the number of people dependent upon her, and the

unmarried man is confined to narrower fortunes.

You know that such a thing is never done. The men always receive the

high salaries and the women always receive the low salaries; no one

ever asks who does the work or who supports the families. It is only a

feeble excuse to hide men's selfish greed. They are the lions, and

they take the lion's share. They _can_ give themselves plenty and

women a pittance, and they do it, and they mean to do it, and they

will do it. It matters not that the ten or twelve or fourteen hundred

dollars divided among the man's family of himself, his wife, and his

one or two or no children, gives to each, even to the little baby

playing on the floor, as much money for support as the female teacher

receives who devotes her whole time and strength to the school. It

matters not that his children are growing up to be the staff of his

declining years, while the unmarried female assistant has only her own

self for reliance. Man is a thief and holds the bag, and if women do

not like to teach for what they can get, so much the better. They will

be all the more willing to become household drudges.

Again, read the following paragraph from a prominent newspaper printed

in Massachusetts.

"The custom of employing ladies as clerks in the public departments at

Washington is meeting with increased favor. It is said that, generally

speaking, they write more correctly than the men, and as they receive

much smaller salaries, the gain to the government is considerable."

Could six lines better express the wickedness of the relations which

exist between man and woman under the "best government in the world"?

The shabby chivalry of "ladies"; the matter-of-fact manner in which

not only a wrong, but an absurdity, is mentioned, as if it were as

evident as a syllogism, and had no more to do with morality than the

multiplication-table; and then the neat little patriotico-economical

chuckle at the end! Women do the work better than men, and receive

much smaller salaries. A logical sequence, and an excellent example of

the reasoning which is brought to bear on women. Especially dignified

and commanding is the attitude assumed for our government. The Great

Republic, stretching its arms across a continent, vexing every land

for its treasures, and whitening every sea with its sails, yet stoops

over a poor woman's pocket to take toll of the few pennies which her

labor has fairly earned. "The wise _save_ it call."

But there is a lower deep than this. The very same paper that so

naively blazoned forth its own shame, made another brilliant essay at

about the same time. I quote the paragraph from memory, but it is

substantially correct.

"Miss Anna Dickinson demanded three [or six, or whatever it was]

hundred dollars for two lectures delivered for the benefit of the

Sanitary Fair in Chicago. Miss Charlotte Cushman gave eight thousand

dollars, the entire proceeds of her theatrical tour, to the Sanitary

Commission. Comment is unnecessary."

For all that, we will have a little comment. Here is one woman in a

million rising by the sheer force of her God-given genius above the

miserable necessities of women. She needs not to endure or to beg. She

is sovereign in her own right and can dictate her own terms. Men

cannot grind her face, for she is stronger than they. What do they do?

They hold her up to odium because they cannot extort from her the

money which they cannot prevent her from earning. Most women they can

prevent from earning it. Most working-women they can keep down to what

prices they choose to pay. But here is one to whom they cannot dole

out pennies: "with one white arm-sweep" she gathers in a golden

harvest. But they will at least force her Pactolian stream into a

channel of their own choosing. Not at all.

"If she will, she will, you may depend on 't;

If she won't, she won't, and there's an end on 't."

Nothing, therefore, is left to these high-minded gentry, but to stand

at a distance and "make faces"!

Somebody assumed to excuse Miss Dickinson, by saying that she gave up

other and far more lucrative engagements for this; but it was entirely

a work of supererogation. Miss Dickinson needed no excuse. One might,

indeed, think within himself that Miss Cushman has nearly closed her

public career, and is already possessed of an independent fortune,

while Miss Dickinson's life lies before her, and her fortune is still

to be made. But all this is irrelevant. The whole paragraph is an

impertinence. Why is any person to be mulcted at another's instance in

any sum for any charity or any purpose whatever? What right has any

newspaper to decide the direction or the amount of a citizen's

benevolence? Had it concerned a man, it would have been impertinence;

concerning a woman, it is something worse,--not because of her

womanhood, but because of the injustice which is wrought upon her sex

wherever there is the ability to be unjust.

These are very small things, but they are signs of great ones.

It may be inferred, therefore, that woman's indifference to excellence

in work does not necessarily impugn either her character or calibre.

Excellence is indeed good in itself, and desirable, without reference

to the money it brings; yet money and promotion are a spur, and

therefore they must be taken into the account when we are dealing with

facts and not merely with theories.

Now, then, let women, disregarding senseless and wicked customs, make

a point of making a point of something, and then let them lay aside

every weight which social injustice or indifference hangs upon them,

and the consequent sin of superficiality which so easily besets them,

and make that point perfect. No matter that they are ill-paid and held

down, let them assert themselves; let them work so well that their

work shall assert itself, and pay and promotion will come--to woman,

if not to themselves--as the inevitable result.

I do not mean that every woman should study medicine, or apprentice

herself to a trade. Indeed, I consider it to be a wrong state of

society in which there is any other necessity for her doing so than

that which arises from her own inward promptings. It is very likely

that she can find in her father's house abundant scope for the

exercise of every faculty. She may have a leaning to home life, and to

no other. Because a girl remains at home, it by no means follows that

she is accomplishing nothing. What I do mean is, that she shall not

dawdle away her time simply because she is a girl; and that if, moved

by her own instincts, which are from God, or impelled by

circumstances, which are generally the fault of men, she enters the

arena where men strive, she shall have no other disabilities than

those which Nature lays upon her. Do not fail to note the distinction

between choice and necessity in her adoption of a career. When a

woman, of her own free will and delight, pursues a study or an

occupation beyond the common female range, it is one thing. When she

is obliged to earn her own living, and for that purpose goes out into

the paths where men walk, it is another thing. In both cases she

should work on equal terms with men; in the first, because the very

strength of her purpose, overcoming the natural disinclinations of her

sex, shows it to be of celestial origin, and therefore worthy of

respect; in the second, because, if man fails to give to woman the

support which is her due, the smallest step towards reparation is to

allow her every advantage in the attempt to support herself. It is

always a sorrowful, I think it is always an injurious thing, for a

woman to be obliged to compete with men, that is, to earn money. She

can do it only at the constant torture, or the constant

sacrifice--perhaps both--of something higher than can be brought into

the strife. But so much the more should she be freed from every

unnecessary pain and hinderance. Moreover, evil as is the imperative

assumption by woman of man's work, it combats a greater evil, and

therefore also should her hands be upheld. The most persistent and

kindly encouragement can never change, in the womanly heart, love of

home into love of conquest and renown; but it can do much to soften

the harshness of an uncongenial lot, and take somewhat from the

bitterness of a cup that never can be sweet.

The mere fact of a daughter's services being needed at home is no

reason why they shall be claimed after she has become of age, either

through years, or maturity of character, when such service is

distasteful to her, and other service is tasteful and possible. If,

for instance, a girl has a strong desire to be a milliner, or a

mantua-maker, or an artist, she should not be prevented because her

mother wants her at home to help take care of the children and do the

work. I suppose to many this will seem unnatural and undutiful. It is

neither the one nor the other. There are remarkable notions afloat

concerning nature and duty. If one may judge from popular ethics, the

duty seems to lie chiefly on one side. Lions, we are told, would

appear to the world in a very different light if lions wrote history;

so filial and parental relations, discussed as they always are by the

parental part of the community, have a different bearing from what

they would if looked at from the children's point of view. In our

eagerness to enforce the claims which parents have on children, we

seem sometimes ready to forget the equally stringent claims which

children have on parents. Much is said about the gratitude which

parental care imposes upon the child; very little about the

responsibility which his involuntary birth imposed upon himself.

Here is a daughter, an immortal being, accountable to God. Surely,

when she has become a woman, she has a right to direct her life in the

manner best adapted to bring out its abilities. No human being has a

right to appropriate another human being's life,--even if they be

mother and daughter. You say that she owes life itself to her parents.

True, but in such a way that it confers an additional obligation on

them to give her every opportunity to make the most of life, and not

in such a way as to justify them in monopolizing it, nor in such a way

as to render her accountable to them alone for its use. The person who

gives life is under much stronger bonds than the person who receives

life. Life is a momentous thing. It may be an eternal curse. It is

almost certain to involve deep sorrow. Sin, disease, pain, are almost

sure to follow in its wake. It is a Pandora's box whose best treasure

is only a compensation. The happiest thing we know of it is, that it

will one day come to an end: Psyche will rend off her disguises, and

soar in her proper form. The uncertainty of the future is our solace

against the certainty of the present. Surely, then, of all people in

the world, those who impose this fearful burden are the very last who

should add even a feather's weight to it, and the very first and

foremost who should at any sacrifice of less important matters lighten

it as far as possible. Filial unfaithfulness is a sin, but parental

unfaithfulness is a chief of sins. The first violates relations which

it finds. The second violates those which it makes. Almost invariably

the second is the direct cause of the first. There may be

extraordinary malformations: a child may be born with some organic

incapacity for love, or gratitude, or virtue, as children are born

blind or deaf. But, as a rule, parental love and wisdom result in

filial love and duty growing stronger and stronger every day, and

removing the possibility of sacrifice by making all service a

pleasure. Because, where I knew the circumstances, I never saw an

instance of filial misbehavior that could not be traced directly to

parental mismanagement or neglect, I believe it is so where I do not

know the circumstances. I am persuaded that Solomon had the spirit of

truth when he declared, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and

when he is old he will not depart from it." A son administers arsenic

to his parents, and the world starts back in horror. I would not

diminish its horror; but before you lavish all your execration on the

son, find out whether the parents have not been administering poison,

or suffered poison to be administered, to his mind and heart from his

earliest infancy. Be shocked at that. I never saw or heard of a son

born of virtuous parents, and wisely trained in the ways of virtue,

who turned about and poisoned his parents after he had grown up. The

eider-duck plucks the down from her own breast to warm the nest for

her young, and I do not suppose an ungrateful or rebellious

eider-duckling was ever heard of; but if the eider-duck plucks the

down from the breasts of her young to line the nest for herself--what

then?

If a daughter, out of love or a "sense of duty," chooses to sacrifice

her inclinations,--by inclinations I do not mean the mere promptings

of self-indulgence, but the voice of her soul calling her to a work in

life,--I say not that she does not well. I only say that her mother

has no right to demand such a sacrifice. It is an unjust exaction. It

is a selfish building up of comfort on the ruins of another's

happiness, possibly of character, since few things are so apt to warp

the tone of mind and temper as a forced performance of unsuitable

work. Before children are old enough to choose for themselves, their

parents must choose for them,--even then with a wary care lest they

mistake a prompting of nature for a whim, but every restraint that is

put upon a child for any other purpose than his own benefit is a sin

against a soul. What duty his love does not prompt, you shall not by

the sheer brute force of your position require. His life is in his own

hands, put there by you, and he must make it into a vessel of honor or

dishonor. You shall not hold back his hand from working its own

beautiful designs, that it may putty up the cracks in your time-worn

vessel. You make great account of the care which you took of his

helpless infancy; but he owes no especial gratitude for that. As may

be inferred from what I have before said, it was a debt you owed him.

Having endowed him with life, the least you could do was to help him

make the best of it. It would have been cruel not to do it. You have

only made things even in doing it,--and hardly that. Besides, such

considerations are logically useless. You may fill a child's book,

paper, and ears with his mother's anxiety and care for him. You may

tell him how she has watched over him and toiled for him during his

helpless infancy, and conjure him on that account to love and obey

her. It will be a waste of breath. You might just as well conjugate a

Latin verb to him. He will no more form an intelligent conception of a

mother's love and care from your most forcible description, than he

would from _amo_, _amas_, _amat_. He is not capable of such a

conception. A child's love is an instinct. It gradually develops into

a sentiment which permeates his whole being. The mother's love is also

an instinct. She nurses her child just as instinctively as a hen

gathers her chickens under her wings. There generally is something

more than instinct, but there is instinct. But at no stage of a

child's life is love a matter of reasoning. If it is within him, it

cannot be argued out; if it is not, it cannot be argued in. Never a

person loved because he was convinced he ought to love. He loves

because he loves, and that is all that can be said about it.

I hope I shall not be considered as attempting to weaken the cords

between parents and children. On the contrary, I wish to strengthen

them. But I wish to strengthen them by making them of that unseen,

spiritual substance which alone is worthy of the relation,--proof

against every external force, and drawing more and more closely with

every opening year,--not of that gross and palpable outward material

which chafes and irritates, and which will snap asunder the moment

that young vigor spreads its wings.