A most unfounded report of the approaching demise of Colonel Sibthorp
reached town early last week. Our Leicester correspondent has, however,
furnished us with the following correct particulars, which will be read
with pleasure by those interested in the luxuriant state of the gallant
orator's crops. The truth is, he was seen to enter a hair-dresser's shop,
and it got about amongst the breathless crowd which soon collected, that
the imposing _toupée_, the enchanting whiskers that are the pride of the
county, were to be cropped! This mistake was unhappily removed to give
place to a more fatal one; for instead of submitting to the shears, the
venerable joker bought a paper of _poudre unique_, from which arose the
appalling report that he was about to _dye_!
Our kind friend the indefatigable "correspondent" of the _Observer_,
informs us from authority upon which every reliance may be placed, that
Mr. Grant, the indefatigable statist and author of "Lights and Shadows of
London Life," is now patiently engaged in researches of overwhelming
importance to the public. He will, in his next edition of the above-named
work, be enabled to state from personal inquiry, how many ladies residing
within a circuit of ten miles round London wear false fronts, with the
colours respectively of their real and their artificial hair, together
with the number of times per year the latter are dressed. Besides this,
this untiring author has called at every hairdresser's in the London
Directory, to ascertain the number of times per quarter each customer has
his hair cut, with the quantity and length denuded. From these materials a
result will be drawn up, showing the average duration of crops; and also
how far the hair-cuttings of every day in London would reach, if each hair
were joined together and placed somewhere, so as to go--when enough is
collected--round the world.
The _Morning Herald_ of Monday informs us, that the King of Hanover has
passed a law to regulate the crops not only of the army, but of those in
the civil employ of government. The moustaches of the former are to be, we
hear, exact copies of those sported by Muntz. The hair is to be cut close,
so as to be woven into regulation whiskers for those to whom nature has
denied them. The pattern whisker was lately submitted by Mr. Truefit, who
is to be the army contractor for the same. It curls over the cheek, and
meets the moustaches at the corners of the mouth.
In consequence of this measure, large sales in bear's grease were made by
the Russian merchants on 'Change yesterday for the German markets. A
consequent rise in this species of manure took place; this will, it is
feared, have a bad effect upon the British crops, which have already
assumed a dry and languid appearance.
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