CHAPTER XIII

Time stood still for Penderel, waiting there in the hall. A few moments

before, when he had been hustling the women across to that room, it had

seemed as if there wasn’t a second to waste, but now, as he listened in

loneliness between those locked doors, he found there was time enough

and to spare. No sound came from above. He crossed over to the door

through which Morgan and Waverton and Sir William had disappeared in a

struggling mass, and he tried the handle. It was locked, of course; he

knew very well it was. That meant that Waverton and Sir William would

first have to dispose of Morgan and then get the key from the Femm

woman, before they could join him. And Morgan might easily be a match

for both of them for some time yet. He listened at the door. Vague,

distant sounds came through, suggesting that Morgan had not yet been

overpowered but was still putting up a fight somewhere at the end of

the corridor, perhaps in or near the kitchen. A creak from the

stairs sent him back into the middle of the hall, with his heart-beats

filling his ears. But nobody was there.

If that had been the moment for action, he felt, all would have been

well. There was, however, nothing to do but wait, listen to the mocking

old timbers and wait, stare at the jumping shadows and wait; and now he

suddenly felt sick and afraid. He wanted to run away, to take the good

the night had brought him, out of its darkness, and hurry with it into

safety. But he could not take it away, for if he went now, hiding his

head, it would not go with him: all would be lost. Well, he had wanted

something to do, and here was something to do. He hadn’t had to wait

long, he told himself grimly. How queer it was that there was something

inside you that could relish, grinning with irony, the most damnable

situation you found yourself in, pointing out how damnable it was! He’d

discovered that in France, when, as now, something in him was afraid

and something else wasn’t, something shook and something grinned. Some

of the old faces came popping up, smiled, and were gone; fellows he

thought he’d forgotten; a spectral parade; and he wanted to keep

one steadily before him so that he could cry ‘It’s a good war’ and once

again hear it call back to him, just one of the daft old slogans: ‘Jam

for the troops, mate.’ He would feel better after that. He might give

Gladys a shout. She’d understand. But no, that wouldn’t do.

His eye went travelling idly up the dimly lighted stairs, waiting

for madness to creep down from the dark, and then suddenly his mind

cleared. His place wasn’t here, dithering and dreaming, but at the top

of those stairs. Once down here, the madman might easily escape him

and let hell loose, unless of course the other two came back before he

arrived. So long as there wasn’t another way down, the best place for

him was obviously at the top there; and even if there should be another

way down, he wouldn’t be much worse off up there, because it wouldn’t

take him long to get back again. And the sooner he went up the better.

He walked forward, then stopped and looked round hesitantly. His hand

went to his forehead, which was cold and wet. Wasn’t there something

he could take with him, something to grip? Well, there was a

poker, and that was better than nothing. Hastily he seized it, and

was crossing to the foot of the stairs when he bethought himself of

the light. He couldn’t take it with him, that would be too dangerous;

but if he put the lamp somewhere near the front door it would throw a

little more light on the place where he would have to take his stand,

at the very top of the stairs.

He crept up, slowly, shakily, his shadow leaping and sprawling before

him. There were little noises everywhere now, not a stair in the house

without its creak. All that part of the house that yawned above him

seemed tense, expectant. The little patch of darkness at the top was

thick and crawling with unrevealed terrors. A step or two more and

out of that blackness would spring a white, gibbering face. He’d had

a dream like that once—it all came back to him, raw and palpitating,

the whole experience, almost between one stair and the next—and he

remembered how he had wakened, a little boy sobbing in the night, to

find his mother bending over him. Who would bend over him now? Why

hadn’t they turned God into this vast maternal presence, smooth

hands and a murmuring voice and a familiar lovely smell in the dark?

He was standing at the very top now, one hand behind him, touching

the rail, the other achingly folded round the poker. While his eyes

stared into the shadows and his ears seemed to run on and search the

landing, his thoughts went sickeningly racing round. He was terribly

afraid now, angry with himself for standing there. Why shouldn’t he

rush downstairs, join Gladys in that room and lock the door, or plunge

out into the night itself, into safety and sweet air? However, probably

nothing would happen. But then, if nothing happened, he would be all

right here. And if he went and something did happen, whether it hurt

him or not, he knew that all would be over, the road missed for ever;

the rest would be just breathing and eating and sleeping, with his

spirit, a poor shamed ghost, returning time and again to take its stand

on these stairs.

Yes, he could only stay. What was that? Surely that was somebody

moving, not very far away? Why didn’t Waverton and Porterhouse show

themselves? But then they wouldn’t, not because they didn’t want to,

but because it always happened like that: he might have known that

he would have to be alone. He’d always been more afraid of madness than

anything else—the very thought of a maniac had always filled him with

terror, and when this creature had raved on the stairs he’d felt sick,

as if he were being pelted with lumps of putrid flesh—and of course

he’d have to come in the end to face it alone. The thing came at last,

the darkness shaping itself, and immediately everybody disappeared,

doors were locked all round you, and you found yourself alone with it.

That noise again, much nearer this time! Yes, he was at the other end

of the landing. He was coming on steadily.

‘Stop!’ he cried, quite involuntarily. ‘Stay there, d’you hear? Don’t

try to get past. I’ve got a poker here and I shall use it.’ His voice

was ridiculously hoarse and shaky, not at all commanding.

The footsteps ceased, and he found he could just see a vague outline of

the madman standing there a few yards away. Undoubtedly he had stopped

at the sound of a voice, but he made no reply. Penderel waited and then

asked himself despairingly how he could have expected a reply. Madness

wouldn’t stand there bandying words with him. Nevertheless he had

stopped.

‘Go back and don’t be a fool.’ Sheer necessity compelled him to speak

out again, for only the sound of his own voice kept him from running

away. ‘You’re not coming past here. Get back at once.’ It was woefully

grotesque and futile perhaps, yet it raised his spirits a little.

Now there came an answering gabble from that vague shape, a gabble that

seemed to end in a kind of chuckle. There was a movement, followed by a

quick pattering down the landing. He was going away.

In his astonishment and relief, Penderel sank back against the

banisters. Was it all over, then? Had he really gone? Did it only need

a command or two, however shaky, just simple courage, no matter if it

was raised perilously on tip-toe, to turn aside—flicking it away—what

had seemed doom itself? There came now a moment of triumph, and his

spirits went soaring. It seemed as if the corner were turned at last,

and he had a flashing vision of life stretched widely and gloriously

before him, the shining happy valley, lost for years and apparently

gone for ever, a dream bitterly cast off, until this strange night

brought glimpse after glimpse of it through thinning mist, and now

finally swung it into full view. Now he knew what it was to be alive.

He could have cried aloud with happiness.

The very next moment he was sick at heart. He heard the quick pattering

again; the footsteps were hastening towards him through the darkness;

and everything, even his courage, collapsed at the sound. He wanted

to run headlong now, to run crying defeat and then to hide himself

for ever. But one last slender cord of will, still unbroken, kept him

standing there.

‘Stop!’ he cried again. But how feeble it sounded! He wanted to implore

now and not to command.

The maniac had stopped already, however, though this time he was

nearer. There burst from him a sudden yell of rage.

Penderel drew himself up and tried to control his voice. ‘You can’t

come here, I tell you——’ he began; but before he could say any more,

something heavy, a chair or a small table, came flying through the air,

smashing against his right arm and ribs, sending the poker clattering

below, and knocking him sideways and backwards against the

banisters as it crashed into them itself. He fell down, helpless in a

spinning world, dizzy and sick. His arm hurt dreadfully, seemed to be

broken. Soon the creature would be trampling the life out of him. He

tried to rise, but it was too late, the maniac was upon him, and he

received a blow in the face that sent his head back with a dreadful

jolt and blinded him for a moment.

There was no fear left in him now. In an agony of effort he flung

himself forward, grabbed the man’s legs and put out all his strength

in one great lift. Down he came, and now they were rolling about the

floor, tearing at one another. Penderel found himself possessed by a

tremendous fury: ‘You bloody swine!’ he was jerking out, ‘I’ll kill

you.’ He contrived to scramble to his feet, but before he had time to

do anything but pull himself up, dizzily and achingly, the other was

on his feet too and renewing the attack. He was a much older man than

Penderel, but he was also much bigger and heavier and seemed to be

unusually powerful.

Penderel had his back against the banisters. For a minute or two,

while the madman was still breathless, there was little danger. He was

able to dodge or ward off the lumbering blows aimed at him. He

covered himself with his left arm, for the right, though not entirely

useless, hurt him terribly every time he moved it. Indeed, all his

right side ached, and whenever he took a deep breath he felt a little

stab of pain there. Standing where he was, he wasn’t really barring the

way downstairs, though he could leap upon the man’s back if he should

try to go down; but it was evident now that Saul Femm—Penderel had

begun to give him his name—intended to settle with him before going

any further. And if he could only hold out here, he told himself, the

others would be in little danger. Waverton and Porterhouse might return

any minute now, and even if he was finished before they did return, he

would leave Saul in no condition to deal with them. There was just a

minute or two in which to think of these things.

Now Saul was completely recovered and, screaming wildly, he hurled

himself upon Penderel, who heard the banisters cracking ominously

behind him. He felt helpless in the man’s grasp. The pressure of the

banisters against the small of his back was agonising. And struggle

as he might, he could not release himself. One hand was fumbling

for his throat. The banisters were cracking again, and he felt himself

being lifted. Desperately he drew up one leg and, hanging on with all

his might, drove his knee into the other man’s belly, released the

pressure a little, contrived to slip his leg down again, pushed a hand

up under Saul’s slavering chin, and by summoning the very remnant of

his strength was able to send them both tottering forward a pace, clear

of the banisters. There they swayed, six inches this way and that, at

close grips.

Blood and sweat ran down his face, blinding him; the pain in his side

was intolerable; and he felt his strength ebbing out; but he held on,

held on as if there was nothing else left in the world to do. And all

the while his mind, escaping from this shameful nightmare of stench and

blood and pain, went darting back to queer memories and flashing along

the edge of vivid little dreams; and once more he was lying in the long

cool grass near the playing-field wall, or listening to Jim and Tom

Ranger outside a tent, a glimmer of starlight there, or standing under

the blossom at Garthstead; and oddly mingling with these memories were

thoughts that came and went like swallows, thoughts of the dusk

and glitter of town at early evening, quiet pipes in the night, the

loud jolly orchestra and the brightening curtain, that little place

up five flights of stairs, Gladys laughing at him, brave eyes meeting

his through a door suddenly opened. They were so long, so long swaying

there in the dark, there was time for a whole shadow show of life.

He couldn’t see at all now; he had to fight for each stabbing breath;

and the blood drummed relentlessly in his ears. One hand had found

Saul’s throat and tightened on it, but he could no longer hold his

ground and fell back inch after inch until at last he seemed to be

lifted off his feet. He went crashing against the banisters; something

was breaking; the life was being squeezed out of him; but still he held

on. Now they were clear of the banisters again, for Saul had relaxed

his pressure for a moment and had been compelled to fall back a step,

with Penderel still clinging to him. Saul put out all his remaining

strength in one tremendous heave. ‘I’m done, I’m done,’ Penderel was

crying, crying through a black night of crashing, splintering woodwork

and rushing air. And then there was no more pain.

Benighted · 第 13 / 15 章