Officers of the government.--Remarks on the permanency of the seat
of government.--No authority in the constitution to remove it.
--Monomaniacs, one who fancies himself in paradise! and the other
expects to be elected the next president!--Other monomaniacs
equally crazy.--LOCAL INFORMATION.
The chief clerks, such as M’Clintock Young of the treasury department,
Mr. Moore of the general land office, Wm. B. Randolph of the
treasurer’s office, Mr. Pleasants, Thos. L. Smith the Register, and M.
Nourse, his chief clerk, are always at their posts, attending to their
duties. Without just such men, the public business could not be done.
In the state department, Messrs. Winder and Carroll and Pleasonton are
always engaged in their proper business. Perhaps there is not an idler
in that department. Major Lewis and all his clerks, James Eakin, his
chief clerk, Josiah Polk and all, are very industrious and attentive to
their duties. So in the general post office, M. St. Clair Clarke and
all his clerks, the several assistant postmasters general, and Judges
Smith and Hotchkiss, S. B. Beach, Stone, Gen. Allen and all the clerks
labor hard all day long. In the offices of the war department and in
the naval office, I am not sufficiently informed to tell the reader
anything about them. Generals Towson, Abert, Bomford, Gibson and all
the officers of their grade are always industrious, always attentive
to their business. In all these stations no changes could be made for
the better I am sure. Judge Blake of the general land office deserves
an honorable mention, for having appointed Wm. Darby and several others
like him, clerks; and for his kind treatment of all his subordinates.
The changes of heads of department, which are more and more frequent of
late years than formerly produce changes among the clerks. No sooner
is any new head of department inducted into his office, than he seeks
forthwith a place for some relative or dependant. If there be any
vacancy, this creature fills it; if there be no vacancy, the new head
of department creates a vacancy and puts his creature in it. When
any secretary leaves his office, he endeavors to keep his dependant
still on the list of office holders. James Madison Porter left three
relatives in offices, two Porters and a Wolf. These secretaries being
changed very often of late years, renders the tenure of office very
uncertain, very precarious. In looking back on the last few years, we
see changes of heads of department so frequent as to render it almost
ludicrous for a secretary to undertake to get personally acquainted
with his clerks, before he goes back into private life again. Why is
it the ambition of any man in this country to be a secretary or a head
of department? And yet, it is evident enough that those who fill these
stations, think highly of them--their gait, their air and address prove
this. Looked these gentlemen on their stations, as the whole nation
does, these offices would not be coveted at all. Such men as Calhoun
are exceptions, because they act as if they knew what they were doing
and felt all their responsibility and all the cares of office. In his
manners and industry Mr. Calhoun naturally reminds one of old times,
when men in high stations were beloved by all who had any business
to transact with them. From all I see and hear, I doubt whether the
frequent changes in our highest officers operate beneficially on
the public interest. However, if the chief clerks are not changed,
perhaps, the head of the department being often changed does no great
harm, because the chief clerk is in reality the head of department.
M’Clintock Young has been in reality the secretary of the treasury for
four years past. Without him every thing would have gone to ruin, long
ago, in the department over which he presides.
Former presidents, from Jefferson downward, used to visit the rooms of
clerks and inspect the offices very often, but his Excellency John
Tyler is not so hard on clerks and heads of bureaus. He never visits
them--at least I have not seen him on any such tours of duty. General
Jackson has often gone with me to the rooms of secretaries and clerks,
to inspect their books and to ascertain how they kept their accounts.
Having doubled and trebled the force in the offices, renders such tours
of inspection unnecessary, in order to do all the business of the
several departments faithfully, correctly and well. Two families hold
four clerkships each; so I hear from an authentic source.
Should any citizen of the United States wish to know exactly what is
done with every cent of Uncle Sam’s money, let him call on Thomas
L. Smith, the register of the treasury, and he can there see it at
a glance. Maj. Smith holds the purse strings. If any one wishes to
see models of all the light-houses in the world, let him call on Mr.
Pleasanton in the state department and there he will find them, and
a perfect gentleman to explain every thing that relates to these
light-houses. If any one wishes to see all the books, for which
American authors claim a copy-right, let him call on the Messrs. Winder
and Carroll in the state department, and he will find the books, and
the gentlemen in whom Judge Upshur most confided, as his confidential
clerks. Mr. Calhoun will extend to them the same confidence as Judge
Upshur did. The former is the son of General Winder and the latter
is the descendant of Daniel Carrol of Duddington, a signer of the
declaration of independence.
To those who visit the city from a distance, local information may be
useful, and we give such as we suppose may be of service to them. If
the stranger wish to tarry only a few days, having no business but
to see the city, perhaps Brown’s or Gadsby’s will best suit him; but
if his business be with Congress, capitol hill will best suit him,
and he can put up with Mrs. Ballard, Mrs. Owner, Mrs. Hill or some
other keeper of a boarding house--Mrs. Whitney for instance. I prefer
Mrs. Ballard’s, although the others are all good houses, with good
accomodations. If the stranger’s business is with the departments, he
can stop at Fuller’s, or Mrs. Galabrun’s on the avenue, or Butler’s
on F street, or Mrs. Tilley’s on Tenth, near the avenue. But there
are a hundred other boarding houses, as good as need be, such as Mrs.
Hamilton’s, Miss Polk’s, Mrs. Arguelles’ and a long list of good
houses. Five thousand persons can be well accommodated in Washington
city. For the size of it, this has more and better accomodations for
travellers, than any other city with which I am personally acquainted.
I prefer it to any other east of the Alleghanies, but until the late
riots, Philadelphia stood highest with me. It may be owing to my long
acquaintance with this to me delightful city, that I prefer it.
However much we may loathe occasional loafers, who come here, and
quite too many of them do come here, yet the people themselves are
as good, as the people of any other section of the Union. As a whole,
they are more polished in their manners than any other people in the
confederacy. Trusting to the constitution itself, in accordance with
which, and the laws made under its express provisions, this district
was selected for the PERMANENT seat of government, many persons settled
here, and fixed on the District of Columbia as _their permanent_
residence. Their all is here, their families and their whole fortunes.
Until the seat of government was fixed here, it never had been fixed
permanently any where. Those who had the power delegated to them,
having expended all the power over the subject, that ever was delegated
to any persons to fix on the site of the general government, no power
to change it, remains in the constitution. That vast regions have been
acquired and added to the Union, without a particle of constitutional
authority for the acquisition or addition to the original States, is
true; but that fact cannot change the constitution itself, so far as a
permanent seat of government is concerned in the question.
However, let us change this serious subject for one serio-comic. We
have heard of two maniacs to-day--monomaniacs. One of them seriously
believes himself in paradise! and the other believes that he will be
the next president! Paradise was a place of innocense, the abode of
happiness, a bed of roses, but the presidency is a bed of thorns.
Reposing on such a bed, who could sing, with Thomas Moore,
“Will you come to the bower I have shaded for you,
Where your bed shall be roses bespangled with dew?”
We hear to-day also, that a monomaniac, another one altogether, thinks
that if he can get a certain man elected president in 1844, he, the
maniac, will be elected president in 1848! Still other maniacs expect
to be foreign ministers! What strange delusions in this deluded and
deluding world are all these vagaries of the brain? Shall we call in
Dr. MAYO, or shall we import forthwith all the helebore which both the
Anticyras produce and administer it all to these afflicted patients? or
what shall we do to restore these men to a sound state of mind? Who can
calculate the chances of the next election? We cannot tell by 400,000
individual votes, and we suppose we know just as much about it as the
voters themselves do at this moment.
Sanguine politicians think they know, but they do not know more than we
do, whose minds are not made up yet what we shall do, or how we shall
vote--perhaps, not at all this autumn. Instead of “a light house of the
skies” and buildings for “storm kings,” telegraphs, &c. &c. why not
appropriate money for a lunatic asylum of such large dimensions that
it could accommodate thousands who come here with their humbugs of all
sorts, asking for national aid and support?
Perhaps we ought to have added a chapter on HUMBUGS, in addition to our
MYSTERIES, of this city. Kind reader, it is too late now for such a
chapter, our whole little volume being all filled up and nearly all its
contents are already printed.
LOCAL INFORMATION.
MEETING OF COURTS.
Supreme Court of the United States, second Monday in January.
Circuit Court of the District of Columbia for Washington county, fourth
Monday of March, and fourth Monday of November.
Circuit Court of the District of Columbia for Alexandria county, first
Monday in May and first Monday in October.
Criminal Court of the District of Columbia for Washington county,
second Monday of March, first Monday of June, fourth Monday of October,
and last Monday of December.
Criminal Court of the District of Columbia for Alexandria county, first
Monday of April, and first Monday of November.
BANKS.
Bank of Washington--corner of Louisiana avenue and D street--
discount day, Tuesday, Wm. Gunton, President; James Adams, Cashier.
Bank of the Metropolis--Pennsylvania avenue, between F and G streets,
opposite the Treasury Department--discount day, Friday, John P. Van
Ness, President, Richard Smith, Cashier.
Patriotic Bank--7th street, between C and D streets--discount day,
Thursday, G. C. Grammer, President; Chauncy Bestor, Cashier.
INSURANCE OFFICES.
Firemen’s Insurance Company of Georgetown and Washington--office in
the Hall of the Perseverance Fire Company’s building, Centre Market
Square. Jas. Adams, President; Alex. McIntyre, Secretary.
Franklin Insurance Company--office corner of 7th and D streets, next
door to the Patriotic Bank. G. C. Grammer, President; Alex. McIntyre,
Secretary.
Potomac Fire Insurance Company--office on Bridge street, Georgetown.
John Kurtz, President; Henry King, Secretary.
CHURCHES.
Baptist, Rev. O. B. Brown, 10th street, between E and F.
Baptist, Rev. Mr. Samson, Aldermen’s room, city hall.
Baptist, Rev. Mr. Tindell, corner of 4th street and Virginia avenue.
Baptist, Shiloh, Elder Robert C. Leachman, on Virginia avenue, near 4½
street.
Catholic, St. Patrick’s, Rev. Mr. Mathews, F street, between 9th and
10th.
Catholic, St. Matthews, Rev. J. P. Donelan, corner of H and 15th
streets.
Catholic, St. Peter’s, Rev. Mr. Van Horseigh, 2d street, between C and
D, Capitol Hill.
Friends, l street, between 18th and 19th.
Lutheran, English, Rev. Dr. Muller, City hall.
Lutheran, German, Rev. Ad. Biewend, corner of G and 20th streets.
Methodist Ebenezer, Rev. Messrs. Phelps and Hanson, 4th street, between
F and G, navy yard.
Methodist Foundry, Rev. Mr. Tarring, corner of 4th and G streets.
Methodist Wesley, Rev. Mr. Wilson, corner of F and 5th streets.
Methodist Protestant, Rev. Mr. Southerland, 9th street, between E and F.
Methodist Protestant, Rev. Thomas M. Flint, pastor, 6th street east,
between G and I streets south, near navy yard.
New Jerusalem, Council chamber, City hall.
Presbyterian, Rev. Dr. Laurie, F street, between 14th and 15th.
1st Presbyterian, Rev. Mr. Sprole, 4½ st. between C and D.
2d Presbyterian, Rev. Mr. Knox, corner of H street and New-York avenue.
3d Presbyterian church, on F, between 14th and 15th streets, near the
Treasury Department. Pastor, Rev. Dr. Laurie; Assistant Pastor, Rev.
Septimus Tuston.
4th Presbyterian, Rev. J. C. Smith, 9th street, between G and H.
Christ, Episcopal, Rev. Mr. Bean, G st. between 6th and 7th, navy yard.
St. John’s, Episcopal, Rev. Dr. Hawley, corner of 16th and H streets.
Trinity, Episcopal, Rev. Mr. Stringfellow, 5th street, between
Louisiana avenue and E street.
Protestant Episcopal Mission, Rev. Mr. French, Apollo hall.
Unitarian, Rev. Mr. Bulfinch, corner of D and 6th streets.
CIRCULATING LIBRARIES.
Washington Library--room on 11th st. between Pennsylvania avenue and
D street; open daily from 3 to 5 o’clock, P. M.
Jefferson Apprentices’ Library Association--room west wing City hall;
open every Wednesday and Saturday evenings, from 6 to 9 P. M.
FIRE COMPANIES.
Union--located at the corner of H and 20th streets; W. B. Magruder,
President; Charles Calvert, Secretary.
Franklin--located on 14th street, near Pennsylvania Avenue; regular
night of meeting the first Tuesday in every month. Robert Coltman,
President; William Durr, Secretary.
Perseverance--located on Pennsylvania avenue, Centre market square;
regular night of meeting, the first Thursday in every month. Samuel
Bacon, President; Geo. S. Gideon, Secretary.
Northern Liberties--located on the corner of Massachusetts avenue
and 8th street; regular night of meeting, the first Wednesday in every
month. John Y. Bryant, President; Augustus Brown, Secretary.
Island--located on Maryland avenue, between 10th and 11th streets;
regular night of meeting, the first Thursday in every month. William
Lloyd, President; William T. Doniphan, Secretary.
Columbia--located on South Capitol st., near the Capitol; regular
night of meeting, the first Thursday in every month. James Adams,
President; R. Bright, Secretary.
Anacostia--located on Virginia avenue and L street south; regular
night of meeting, the first Friday in every month. Thos. Thornley,
President; Wm. Gordon, Sec’y.
ARMORIES.
Washington Light Infantry--west wing City hall; regular night of
meeting, the first Monday in every month.
National Blues--east wing City hall; regular night of meeting, the
first Monday in every month.
Columbian Artillery--west wing City hall; regular night of meeting,
the first Tuesday in every month.
Union Guards--hall of the Union engine house; regular night of
meeting, the first Wednesday in every month.
MASONIC.
Federal Lodge No. 1.--room corner of 12th street and Pennsylvania
avenue; regular night of meeting, first Monday in every month.
Potomac Lodge, No. 5, Georgetown--room in Bridge street, opposite
Union hotel; regular night of meeting, fourth Friday in every month.
Lebanon Lodge, No. 7--room corner of 12th street and Pennsylvania
avenue; regular night of meeting, first Friday in every month.
New Jerusalem Lodge, No. 9--room corner of 4½ street and Pennsylvania
avenue; meets on third Tuesday in every month.
Hiram Lodge, No. 10--room over West market, first ward; regular
meeting, first Wednesday in every month.
Grand Lodge of District of Columbia--annual communication first
Tuesday in November, semi-annual, first Tuesday in May. Installation
meeting, St. John’s day.
I. O. O. F.
Central Lodge, No. 1--room City hall; night of regular meeting,
Friday.
Washington Lodge, No. 6--room City hall; night of regular meeting,
Tuesday.
Eastern Lodge, No. 7--at present occupying a room in Masonic hall,
navy yard; night of regular meeting, Friday.
Potomac Lodge, No. 8--Odd Fellows’ hall, Alexandria; regular night of
meeting, Friday.
Harmony Lodge, No. 10--room City hall; regular night of meeting,
Thursday.
Union Lodge No. 11--Odd Fellows hall, navy yard; regular night of
meeting, Wednesday.
Friendship Lodge, No. 12--room over West market, first ward; night of
regular meeting, Thursday.
Covenant Lodge, No. 13--Odd Fellows hall, Jefferson street,
Georgetown; regular night of meeting, Monday.
Columbian Encampment, No. 1--room City hall; regular night of
meeting, last Wednesday in every month.
Marley Encampment, No. 2--Odd Fellows’ hall, Alexandria; regular
nights of meeting, second and fourth Mondays in every month.
Grand Lodge of the District of Columbia meets annually on the second
Monday in November, and quarterly on the second Mondays of January,
April, July and Oct.
SONS OF TEMPERANCE.
Timothy Division, No. 1--room Buckingham’s hall, on C street, between
10th and 11th; night of meeting, Wednesday.
Harmony Division, No. 2--room St. Asaph street, Alexandria; night of
regular meeting, Monday.
Freemen’s Vigilant--room Carusi’s saloon; regular night of meeting,
Friday.
BENEFICIAL SOCIETY.
Island Beneficial Society of the city of Washington--night of regular
meeting, the first Thursday in every month. John W. Martin, President;
W. T. Doniphan, Sec’y.
TYPOGRAPHICAL SOCIETY.
Columbia Typographical Society--Buckingham’s room, on C street,
opposite Carusi’s Saloon. Regular night of meeting, first Saturday in
every month; President, Ferdinand Jefferson; Recording Secretary, James
Wimer; Corresponding Secretary, James N. Davis.
The studio of C. B. King is on 12th street between E and F streets.
ERRATA.
On page 73, for John H. read _John S. Meehan_.
On page 119 for Sellons read _Selden’s refectory_.
On page 124 for a statue of Marshall, read _a bust of Mr. Jefferson,
resting &c._
On page 145 for Zephur, read _Zephyr_.
On page 163 read _Strike higher, strike higher, Oh! strike higher!_
There are a few literal errors which the reader will correct as he
reads the work.
Transcriber’s Notes
Punctuation and spelling were made consistent when a predominant
preference was found in this book; otherwise they were not changed.
This book was published in 1844, so some words may have been spelled
differently than they are now.
Simple typographical errors were corrected; occasional unbalanced
quotation marks retained.
Ambiguous hyphens at the ends of lines were retained; occurrences of
inconsistent hyphenation have not been changed.
Most of the _Errata_ on the last page of the book have been corrected
within the text; the change to page 163 was not made because it was
ambiguous.
Page 132: “Hopson’s choice” probably is a misprint for “Hobson’s
choice”.
Page 153: “smooth and melodies” was printed that way.
Page 168: “De gustibus non disputandum” is a misquotation for “De
gustibus non est disputandum”.