SCENE--_Board-room of a Public Company._ TIME--_A few minutes after
the close of a General Meeting._ PRESENT--_Chairman of Directors and
Secretary._
_Chairman._ Well, I think I got in all that was wanted?
_Secretary._ Could not have been better, Sir. You had the figures at
your fingers' ends.
_Chair. (laughing)._ You mean on a sheet of paper in front of me.
_Sec._ And everyone was satisfied, Sir.
_Chair._ As they should have been, considering my flaming account of
the prosperity of the undertaking. By the way, _is_ it flourishing?
_Sec._ Well, Sir, that is scarcely in my department. You must ask the
auditors.
_Chair._ Oh, never mind; it is a matter of no importance.
_Sec._ I daresay if you wanted any information, Sir, I could get it
for you.
_Chair._ No, thanks, I don't want to increase my work. I am sure I do
quite enough for my wretched two or three hundred a year--don't you
think so?
_Sec._ Certainly, Sir. You do a great deal more than some Chairmen.
_Chair._ Yes, I suppose I do. Come here once a year, and preside over
an Annual Meeting, and draw my fees. What more _can_ I do?
_Sec._ I'm sure I don't know, Sir. A knowledge of the duties of a
Chairman of Directors comes scarcely within the scope of my required
services.
_Chair._ Quite so; and now I will say Good-bye!
_Sec._ See you again next year, Sir?
_Chair._ Certainly. If I don't sell out in the meantime. And now
I must be off. I am due at another meeting, and have to get up the
necessary figures in five minutes. Do you think I shall do it in the
time?
_Sec._ Certainly, Sir. You managed the task in less here.
[_Scene closes in upon the valuable pair--and the security of the
Public._
* * * * *
"FRIENDLY RIFLERY."--"MELLISH has followed his miss with an inner and
two bullseyes." Very kind of MELLISH. We hope "his Miss" accepted the
two bullseyes. "BOYD and GIBBS got magpies." Whatever sort of pies
these may be, it is evident that, with "pies" and "bullseyes," our
riflemen are fond of sweets.
* * * * *
[Illustration: MAGNA EST VERITAS.
"MY DAUGHTER WILL NEVER GET ANOTHER PLACE WITH THE CHARACTER YOU'VE
BEEN GIVING HER, MY LADY!"
"I'VE ONLY TOLD THE _TRUTH_ ABOUT YOUR DAUGHTER, AND NOTHING _BUT_ THE
TRUTH!"
"HOW WOULD YOU LIKE THE TRUTH, AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH, TOLD ABOUT
_YOU_, MY LADY?"]
* * * * *