'Twas ever thus;--from childhood's hour
I've seen my fondest hopes decay;--
I never loved a tree or flower,
But it was sure to fade away;
I never nursed a dear Gazelle,
To glad me with its dark-blue eye,
But, when it came to know me well,
And love me, it was sure to die.
MOORE.
"During my life I have remarked that fate has invariably chosen for the
time of its severest visitations, those moments when my fortune seemed
established on the firmest basis. In the friendship of M. de T----,
and the tender affections of Manon, I imagined myself so thoroughly
happy, that I could not harbour the slightest apprehension of any new
misfortune: there was one, nevertheless, at this very period impending,
which reduced me to the state in which you beheld me at Passy, and
which eventually brought in its train miseries of so deplorable a
nature, that you will have difficulty in believing the simple recital
that follows.
"One evening, when M. de T---- remained to sup with us, we heard the
sound of a carriage stopping at the door of the inn. Curiosity tempted
us to see who it was that arrived at this hour. They told us it was
young G---- M----, the son of our most vindictive enemy, of that
debauched old sinner who had incarcerated me in St. Lazare, and Manon
in the Hospital. His name made the blood mount to my cheeks. 'It is
Providence that has led him here,' said I to M. de T----, that I may
punish him for the cowardly baseness of his father. He shall not
escape without our measuring swords at least.' M. de T----, who knew
him, and was even one of his most intimate friends, tried to moderate
my feelings of anger towards him. He assured me that he was a most
amiable young man, and so little capable of countenancing his father's
conduct, that I could not be many minutes in his society without
feeling esteem and affection for him. After saying many more things in
his praise, he begged my permission to invite him to come and sit in
our apartment, as well as to share the remainder of our supper. As to
the objection of Manon being exposed by this proceeding to any danger,
he pledged his honour and good faith, that when once the young man
became acquainted with us, we should find in him a most zealous
defender. After such an assurance, I could offer no further opposition.
"M. de T---- did not introduce him without delaying a few moments
outside, to let him know who we were. He certainly came in with an air
that prepossessed us in his favour: he shook hands with me; we sat
down; he admired Manon; he appeared pleased with me, and with
everything that belonged to us; and he ate with an appetite that did
abundant honour to our hospitality.
"When the table was cleared, our conversation became more serious. He
hung down his head while he spoke of his father's conduct towards us.
He made, on his own part, the most submissive excuses. 'I say the less
upon the subject,' said he, 'because I do not wish to recall a
circumstance that fills me with grief and shame.' If he were sincere
in the beginning, he became much more so in the end, for the
conversation had not lasted half an hour, when I perceived that Manon's
charms had made a visible impression upon him. His looks and his
manner became by degrees more tender. He, however, allowed no
expression to escape him; but, without even the aid of jealousy, I had
had experience enough in love affairs to discern what was passing.
"He remained with us till a late hour in the night, and before he took
his leave, congratulated himself on having made our acquaintance, and
begged permission to call and renew the offer of his services. He went
off next morning with M. de T----, who accepted the offer of a seat in
his carriage.
"I felt, as I before said, not the slightest symptom of jealousy: I had
a more foolish confidence than ever in Manon's vows. This dear
creature had so absolute a dominion over my whole soul and affections,
that I could give place to no other sentiment towards her than that of
admiration and love. Far from considering it a crime that she should
have pleased young G---- M----, I was gratified by the effect of her
charms, and experienced only a feeling of pride in being loved by a
girl whom the whole world found so enchanting. I did not even deem it
worth while to mention my suspicions to her. We were for some days
occupied in arranging her new wardrobe, and in considering whether we
might venture to the theatre without the risk of being recognised. M.
de T---- came again to see us before the end of the week, and we
consulted him upon this point. He saw clearly that the way to please
Manon was to say yes: we resolved to go all together that same evening.
"We were not able, however, to carry this intention into effect; for,
having taken me aside, 'I have been in the greatest embarrassment,'
said he to me, 'since I saw you, and that is the cause of my visiting
you today. G---- M---- is in love with your mistress: he told me so in
confidence; I am his intimate friend, and disposed to do him any
service in my power; but I am not less devoted to you; his designs
appeared to me unjustifiable, and I expressed my disapprobation of
them; I should not have divulged his secret, if he had only intended to
use fair and ordinary means for gaining Manon's affections; but he is
aware of her capricious disposition; he has learned, God knows how,
that her ruling passion is for affluence and pleasure; and, as he is
already in possession of a considerable fortune, he declared his
intention of tempting her at once with a present of great value, and
the offer of an annuity of six thousand francs; if I had in all other
points considered you both in an equal light, I should have had perhaps
to do more violence to my feelings in betraying him: but a sense of
justice as well as of friendship was on your side, and the more so from
having been myself the imprudent, though unconscious, cause of his
passion in introducing him here. I feel it my duty therefore to avert
any evil consequences from the mischief I have inadvertently caused.
"I thanked M. de T---- for rendering me so important a service, and
confessed to him, in a like spirit of confidence, that Manon's
disposition was precisely what G---- M---- had imagined; that is to
say, that she was incapable of enduring even the thought of poverty.
'However,' said I to him, 'when it is a mere question of more or less,
I do not believe that she would give me up for any other person; I can
afford to let her want for nothing, and I have from day to day reason
to hope that my fortune will improve; I only dread one thing,'
continued I, 'which is, that G---- M---- may take unfair advantage of
the knowledge he has of our place of residence, and bring us into
trouble by disclosing it.'
"M. de T---- assured me that I might be perfectly easy upon that head;
that G---- M---- might be capable of a silly passion, but not of an act
of baseness; that if he ever could be villain enough for such a thing,
he, de T----, would be the first to punish him, and by that means make
reparation for the mischief he had occasioned. 'I feel grateful for
what you say,' said I, 'but the mischief will have been all done, and
the remedy even seems doubtful; the wisest plan therefore will be to
quit Chaillot, and go to reside elsewhere.' 'Very true,' said M. de
T----, 'but you will not be able to do it quickly enough, for G----
M---- is to be here at noon; he told me so yesterday, and it was that
intelligence that made me come so early this morning to inform you of
his intentions. You may expect him every moment.'"
"The urgency of the occasion made me view this matter in a more serious
light. As it seemed to me impossible to escape the visit of G----
M----, and perhaps equally so to prevent him from making his
declaration to Manon, I resolved to tell her beforehand of the designs
of my new rival. I fancied that when she knew I was aware of the
offers that would be made to her, and made probably in my presence, she
would be the more likely to reject them. I told M. de T---- of my
intention, and he observed that he thought it a matter of extreme
delicacy. 'I admit it,' said I, 'but no man ever had more reason for
confiding in a mistress, than I have for relying on the affection of
mine. The only thing that could possibly for a moment blind her, is
the splendour of his offers; no doubt she loves her ease, but she loves
me also; and in my present circumstances, I cannot believe that she
would abandon me for the son of the man who had incarcerated her in the
Magdalen.' In fine, I persisted in my intentions, and taking Manon
aside, I candidly told her what I had learned.
"She thanked me for the good opinion I entertained of her, and promised
to receive G---- M----'s offers in a way that should prevent a
repetition of them. 'No,' said I, 'you must not irritate him by
incivility: he has it in his power to injure us. But you know well
enough, you little rogue,' continued I, smiling, 'how to rid yourself
of a disagreeable or useless lover!' After a moment's pause she said:
'I have just thought of an admirable plan, and I certainly have a
fertile invention. G---- M---- is the son of our bitterest enemy: we
must avenge ourselves on the father, not through the son's person, but
through his purse. My plan is to listen to his proposals, accept his
presents, and then laugh at him.'
"'The project is not a bad one,' said I to her; 'but you forget, my
dear child, that it is precisely the same course that conducted us
formerly to the penitentiary.' I represented to her the danger of such
an enterprise; she replied, that the only thing necessary was to take
our measures with caution, and she found an answer to every objection I
started. 'Show me the lover who does not blindly humour every whim of
an adored mistress, and I will then allow that I was wrong in yielding
so easily on this occasion.' The resolution was taken to make a dupe
of G----M----, and by an unforeseen and unlucky turn of fortune, I
became the victim myself.
"About eleven o'clock his carriage drove up to the door. He made the
most complaisant and refined speeches upon the liberty he had taken of
coming to dine with us uninvited. He was not surprised at meeting M.
de T----, who had the night before promised to meet him there, and who
had, under some pretext or other, refused a seat in his carriage.
Although there was not a single person in the party who was not at
heart meditating treachery, we all sat down with an air of mutual
confidence and friendship. G---- M---- easily found an opportunity of
declaring his sentiments to Manon. I did not wish to annoy him by
appearing vigilant, so I left the room purposely for several minutes.
"I perceived on my return that he had not had to encounter any very
discouraging austerity on Manon's part, for he was in the best possible
spirits. I affected good humour also. He was laughing in his mind at
my simplicity, while I was not less diverted by his own. During the
whole evening we were thus supplying to each other an inexhaustible
fund of amusement. I contrived, before his departure, to let him have
Manon for another moment to himself; so that he had reason to applaud
my complaisance, as well as the hospitable reception I had given him.
"As soon as he got into his carriage with M. de T----, Manon ran
towards me with extended arms, and embraced me; laughing all the while
immoderately. She repeated all his speeches and proposals, without
altering a word. This was the substance: He of course adored her; and
wished to share with her a large fortune of which he was already in
possession, without counting what he was to inherit at his father's
death. She should be sole mistress of his heart and fortune; and as an
immediate token of his liberality, he was ready at once to supply her
with an equipage, a furnished house, a lady's maid, three footmen, and
a man-cook.
"'There is indeed a son,' said I, 'very different from his father! But
tell me truly, now, does not such an offer tempt you?' 'Me!' she
replied, adapting to the idea two verses from Racine--
Moi! vous me soupconnez de cette perfidie?
Moi! je pourrais souffrir un visage odieux,
Qui rappelle toujours l'Hopital a mes yeux?
'No!' replied I, continuing the parody--
J'aurais peine a penser que l'Hopital, madame,
Fut un trait dont l'amour l'eut grave dans votre ame.
'But it assuredly is a temptation--a furnished house, a lady's maid, a
cook, a carriage, and three servants--gallantry can offer but few more
seductive temptations.'
"She protested that her heart was entirely mine, and that it was for
the future only open to the impressions I chose to make upon it. 'I
look upon his promises,' said she, 'as an instrument for revenge,
rather than as a mark of love.' I asked her if she thought of
accepting the hotel and the carriage. She replied that his money was
all she wanted."
The difficulty was, how to obtain the one without the other; we
resolved to wait for a detailed explanation of the whole project in a
letter which G---- M---- promised to write to her, and which in fact
she received next morning by a servant out of livery, who, very
cleverly, contrived an opportunity of speaking to her alone.
She told him to wait for an answer, and immediately brought the letter
to me: we opened it together.
"Passing over the usual commonplace expressions of tenderness, it gave
a particular detail of my rival's promises. There were no limits to
the expense. He engaged to pay her down ten thousand francs on her
taking possession of the hotel, and to supply her expenditure in such a
way as that she should never have less than that sum at her command.
The appointed day for her entering into possession was close at hand.
He only required two days for all his preparations, and he mentioned
the name of the street and the hotel, where he promised to be in
waiting for her in the afternoon of the second day, if she could manage
to escape my vigilance. That was the only point upon which he begged
of her to relieve his uneasiness; he seemed to be quite satisfied upon
every other: but he added that, if she apprehended any difficulty in
escaping from me, he could find sure means for facilitating her flight.
"G---- M---- the younger was more cunning than the old gentleman. He
wanted to secure his prey before he counted out the cash. We
considered what course Manon should adopt. I made another effort to
induce her to give up the scheme, and strongly represented all its
dangers; nothing, however, could shake her determination.
"Her answer to G---- M---- was brief, merely assuring him that she
could be, without the least difficulty, in Paris on the appointed day
and that he might expect her with certainty.
"We then resolved, that I should instantly hire lodgings in some
village on the other side of Paris, and that I should take our luggage
with me; that in the afternoon of the following day, which was the time
appointed, she should go to Paris; that, after receiving G---- M----'s
presents, she should earnestly entreat him to take her to the theatre;
that she should carry with her as large a portion of the money as she
could, and charge my servant with the remainder, for it was agreed that
he was to accompany her. He was the man who had rescued her from the
Magdalen, and he was devotedly attached to us. I was to be with a
hackney-coach at the end of the street of St. Andre-des-arcs, and to
leave it there about seven o'clock, while I stole, under cover of the
twilight, to the door of the theatre. Manon promised to make some
excuse for quitting her box for a moment, when she would come down and
join me. The rest could be easily done. We were then to return to my
hackney-coach, and quit Paris by the Faubourg St. Antoine, which was
the road to our new residence.
"This plan, extravagant as it was, appeared to us satisfactorily
arranged. But our greatest folly was in imagining that, succeed as we
might in its execution, it would be possible for us to escape the
consequences. Nevertheless, we exposed ourselves to all risk with the
blindest confidence. Manon took her departure with Marcel--so was the
servant called. I could not help feeling a pang as she took leave of
me. 'Manon,' said I, 'do not deceive me; will you be faithful to me?'
She complained, in the tenderest tone, of my want of confidence, and
renewed all her protestations of eternal love.
"She was to be in Paris at three o'clock. I went some time after. I
spent the remainder of the afternoon moping in the Cafe de Fere, near
the Pont St. Michel. I remained there till nightfall. I then hired a
hackney-coach, which I placed, according to our plan, at the end of the
street of St. Andre-des-arcs, and went on foot to the door of the
theatre. I was surprised at not seeing Marcel, who was to have been
there waiting for me. I waited patiently for a full hour, standing
among a crowd of lackeys, and gazing at every person that passed. At
length, seven o'clock having struck, without my being able to discover
anything or any person connected with our project, I procured a pit
ticket, in order to ascertain if Manon and G---- M---- were in the
boxes. Neither one nor the other could I find. I returned to the door,
where I again stopped for a quarter of an hour, in an agony of
impatience and uneasiness. No person appeared, and I went back to the
coach, without knowing what to conjecture. The coachman, seeing me,
advanced a few paces towards me, and said, with a mysterious air, that
a very handsome young person had been waiting more than an hour for me
in the coach; that she described me so exactly that he could not be
mistaken, and having learned that I intended to return, she said she
would enter the coach and wait with patience.
"I felt confident that it was Manon. I approached. I beheld a very
pretty face, certainly, but alas, not hers. The lady asked, in a voice
that I had never before heard, whether she had the honour of speaking
to the Chevalier des Grieux? I answered, 'That is my name.' 'I have a
letter for you,' said she, 'which will tell you what has brought me
here, and by what means I learned your name.' I begged she would allow
me a few moments to read it in an adjoining cafe. She proposed to
follow me, and advised me to ask for a private room, to which I
consented. 'Who is the writer of this letter?' I enquired. She
referred me to the letter itself.
"I recognised Manon's hand. This is nearly the substance of the
letter: G---- M---- had received her with a politeness and
magnificence beyond anything she had previously conceived. He had
loaded her with the most gorgeous presents. She had the prospect of
almost imperial splendour. She assured me, however, that she could not
forget me amidst all this magnificence; but that, not being able to
prevail on G---- M---- to take her that evening to the play, she was
obliged to defer the pleasure of seeing me; and that, as a slight
consolation for the disappointment which she feared this might cause
me, she had found a messenger in one of the loveliest girls in all
Paris. She signed herself, 'Your loving and constant, MANON LESCAUT.'
"There was something so cruel and so insulting in the letter, that,
what between indignation and grief, I resolutely determined to forget
eternally my ungrateful and perjured mistress. I looked at the young
woman who stood before me: she was exceedingly pretty, and I could have
wished that she had been sufficiently so to render me inconstant in my
turn. But there were wanting those lovely and languishing eyes, that
divine gracefulness, that exquisite complexion, in fine, those
innumerable charms which nature had so profusely lavished upon the
perfidious Manon. 'No, no,' said I, turning away from her; 'the
ungrateful wretch who sent you knew in her heart that she was sending
you on a useless errand. Return to her; and tell her from me, to
triumph in her crime, and enjoy it, if she can, without remorse. I
abandon her in despair, and, at the same time, renounce all women, who,
without her fascination, are no doubt her equals in baseness and
infidelity.'
"I was then on the point of going away, determined never to bestow
another thought on Manon: the mortal jealousy that was racking my heart
lay concealed under a dark and sullen melancholy, and I fancied,
because I felt none of those violent emotions which I had experienced
upon former occasions, that I had shaken off my thraldom. Alas! I was
even at that moment infinitely more the dupe of love, than of G----
M---- and Manon.
"The girl who had brought the letter, seeing me about to depart, asked
me what I wished her to say to M. G---- M----, and to the lady who was
with him? At this question, I stepped back again into the room, and by
one of those unaccountable transitions that are only known to the
victims of violent passion, I passed in an instant from the state of
subdued tranquillity which I have just described, into an ungovernable
fury 'Away!' said I to her, 'tell the traitor G---- M----and his
abandoned mistress the state of despair into which your accursed
mission has cast me; but warn them that it shall not be long a source
of amusement to them, and that my own hands shall be warmed with the
heart's blood of both!' I sank back upon a chair; my hat fell on one
side, and my cane upon the other: torrents of bitter tears rolled down
my cheeks. The paroxysm of rage changed into a profound and silent
grief: I did nothing but weep and sigh. 'Approach, my child,
approach,' said I to the young girl; 'approach, since it is you they
have sent to bring me comfort; tell me whether you have any balm to
administer for the pangs of despair and rage--any argument to offer
against the crime of self-destruction, which I have resolved upon,
after ridding the world of two perfidious monsters. Yes, approach,'
continued I, perceiving that she advanced with timid and doubtful
steps; 'come and dry my sorrows; come and restore peace to my mind;
come and tell me that at least you love me: you are handsome--I may
perhaps love you in return.' The poor child, who was only sixteen or
seventeen years of age, and who appeared more modest than girls of her
class generally are, was thunderstruck at this unusual scene. She
however gently approached to caress me, when with uplifted hands I
rudely repulsed her. 'What do you wish with me?' exclaimed I to her.
'Ah! you are a woman, and of a sex I abhor, and can no longer tolerate;
the very gentleness of your look threatens me with some new treason.
Go, leave me here alone!' She made me a curtsy without uttering a
word, and turned to go out. I called to her to stop: 'Tell me at
least,' said I, 'wherefore--how--with what design they sent you here?
how did you discover my name, or the place where you could find me?'
"She told me that she had long known M. G---- M----; that he had sent
for her that evening about five o'clock; and that, having followed the
servant who had been dispatched to her, she was shown into a large
house, where she found him playing at picquet with a beautiful young
woman; and that they both charged her to deliver the letter into my
hands, after telling her that she would find me in a hackney-coach at
the bottom of the street of St. Andre. I asked if they had said
nothing more. She blushed while she replied, that they had certainly
made her believe that I should be glad of her society. 'They have
deceived you too,' said I, 'my poor girl--they have deceived you; you
are a woman, and probably wish for a lover; but you must find one who
is rich and happy, and it is not here you will find him. Return,
return to M. G---- M----; he possesses everything requisite to make a
man beloved. He has furnished houses and equipages to bestow, while I,
who have nothing but constancy of love to offer, am despised for my
poverty, and laughed at for my simplicity.'
"I continued in a tone of sorrow or violence, as these feelings
alternately took possession of my mind. However, by the very excess of
my agitation, I became gradually so subdued as to be able calmly to
reflect upon the situation of affairs. I compared this new misfortune
with those which I had already experienced of the same kind, and I
could not perceive that there was any more reason for despair now, than
upon former occasions. I knew Manon: why then distress myself on
account of a calamity which I could not but have plainly foreseen? Why
not rather think of seeking a remedy? there was yet time; I at least
ought not to spare my own exertions, if I wished to avoid the bitter
reproach of having contributed, by my own indolence, to my misery. I
thereupon set about considering every means of raising a gleam of hope.
"To attempt to take her by main force from the hands of G----M---- was
too desperate a project, calculated only to ruin me, and without the
slightest probability of succeeding. But it seemed to me that if I
could ensure a moment's interview with her, I could not fail to regain
my influence over her affections. I so well knew how to excite her
sensibilities! I was so confident of her love for me! The very whim
even of sending me a pretty woman by way of consoling me, I would stake
my existence, was her idea, and that it was the suggestion of her own
sincere sympathy for my sufferings.
"I resolved to exert every nerve to procure an interview. After a
multitude of plans which I canvassed one after another, I fixed upon
the following: M. de T---- had shown so much sincerity in the services
he had rendered me, that I could not entertain a doubt of his zeal and
good faith. I proposed to call upon him at once, and make him send for
G---- M----, under pretence of some important business. Half an hour
would suffice to enable me to see Manon. I thought it would not be
difficult to get introduced into her apartment during G---- M----'s
absence.
"This determination pacified me, and I gave a liberal present to the
girl, who was still with me; and in order to prevent her from returning
to those who had sent her, I took down her address, and half promised
to call upon her at a later hour. I then got into the hackney-coach,
and drove quickly to M. de T----'s. I was fortunate enough to find him
at home. I had been apprehensive upon this point as I went along. A
single sentence put him in possession of the whole case, as well of my
sufferings, as of the friendly service I had come to supplicate at his
hands.
"He was so astonished to learn that G---- M---- had been able to seduce
Manon from me, that, not being aware that I had myself lent a hand to
my own misfortune, he generously offered to assemble his friends, and
evoke their aid for the deliverance of my mistress. I told him that
such a proceeding might by its publicity be attended with danger to
Manon and to me. 'Let us risk our lives,' said I, 'only as a last
resource. My plan is of a more peaceful nature, and promising at least
equal success.' He entered without a murmur into all that I proposed;
so again stating that all I required was, that he should send for G----
M----, and contrive to keep him an hour or two from home, we at once
set about our operations.
"We first of all considered what expedient we could make use of for
keeping him out so long a time. I proposed that he should write a note
dated from a cafe, begging of him to come there as soon as possible
upon an affair of too urgent importance to admit of delay. 'I will
watch,' added I, 'the moment he quits the house, and introduce myself
without any difficulty, being only known to Manon, and my servant
Marcel. You can at the same time tell G---- M----, that the important
affair upon which you wished to see him was the immediate want of a sum
of money; that you had just emptied your purse at play, and that you
had played on, with continued bad luck, upon credit. He will require
some time to take you to his father's house, where he keeps his money,
and I shall have quite sufficient for the execution of my plan.'
"M. de T---- minutely adhered to these directions. I left him in a
cafe, where he at once wrote his letter. I took my station close by
Manon's house. I saw de T----'s messenger arrive, and G---- M---- come
out the next moment, followed by a servant. Allowing him barely time to
get out of the street, I advanced to my deceiver's door, and
notwithstanding the anger I felt, I knocked with as much respect as at
the portal of a church. Fortunately it was Marcel who opened for me.
Although I had nothing to apprehend from the other servants, I asked
him in a low voice if he could conduct me unseen into the room in which
Manon was. He said that was easily done, by merely ascending the great
staircase. 'Come then at once,' said I to him, 'and endeavour to
prevent anyone from coming up while I am there.' I reached the
apartment without any difficulty.
"Manon was reading. I had there an opportunity of admiring the
singular character of this girl. Instead of being nervous or alarmed
at my appearance, she scarcely betrayed a symptom of surprise, which
few persons, however indifferent, could restrain, on seeing one whom
they imagined to be far distant. 'Ah! it is you, my dear love,' said
she, approaching to embrace me with her usual tenderness. 'Good
heavens, how venturesome and foolhardy you are! Who could have
expected to see you in this place!' Instead of embracing her in return,
I repulsed her with indignation, and retreated two or three paces from
her. This evidently disconcerted her. She remained immovable, and
fixed her eyes on me, while she changed colour.
"I was in reality so delighted to behold her once more, that, with so
much real cause for anger, I could hardly bring my lips to upbraid her.
My heart, however, felt the cruel outrage she had inflicted upon me. I
endeavoured to revive the recollection of it in my own mind, in order
to excite my feelings, and put on a look of stern indignation. I
remained silent for a few moments, when I remarked that she observed my
agitation, and trembled: apparently the effect of her fears.
"I could not longer endure this spectacle. 'Ah! Manon,' said I to her
in the mildest tone, 'faithless and perjured Manon! How am I to
complain of your conduct? I see you pale and trembling, and I am still
so much alive to your slightest sufferings, that I am unwilling to add
to them by my reproaches. But, Manon, I tell you that my heart is
pierced with sorrow at your treatment of me--treatment that is seldom
inflicted but with the purpose of destroying one's life. This is the
third time, Manon; I have kept a correct account; it is impossible to
forget that. It is now for you to consider what course you will adopt;
for my afflicted heart is no longer capable of sustaining such shocks.
I know and feel that it must give way, and it is at this moment ready
to burst with grief. I can say no more,' added I, throwing myself into
a chair; 'I have hardly strength to speak, or to support myself.'
"She made me no reply; but when I was seated, she sank down upon her
knees, and rested her head upon my lap, covering her face with her
hands. I perceived in a moment that she was shedding floods of tears.
Heavens! with what conflicting sensations was I at that instant
agitated! 'Ah! Manon, Manon,' said I, sighing, 'it is too late to give
me tears after the death-blow you have inflicted. You affect a sorrow
which you cannot feel. The greatest of your misfortunes is no doubt my
presence, which has been always an obstacle to your happiness. Open
your eyes; look up and see who it is that is here; you will not throw
away tears of tenderness upon an unhappy wretch whom you have betrayed
and abandoned.'
"She kissed my hands without changing her position. 'Inconstant
Manon,' said I again, 'ungrateful and faithless girl, where now are all
your promises and your vows? Capricious and cruel that you are! what
has now become of the love that you protested for me this very day?
Just Heavens,' added I, 'is it thus you permit a traitor to mock you,
after having called you so solemnly to witness her vows! Recompense
and reward then are for the perjured! Despair and neglect are the lot
of fidelity and truth!'
"These words conveyed even to my own mind a sentiment so bitterly
severe, that, in spite of myself, some tears escaped from me. Manon
perceived this by the change in my voice. She at length spoke. 'I
must have indeed done something most culpable,' said she, sobbing with
grief, 'to have excited and annoyed you to this degree; but, I call
Heaven to attest my utter unconsciousness of crime, and my innocence of
all criminal intention!'
"This speech struck me as so devoid of reason and of truth, that I
could not restrain a lively feeling of anger. 'Horrible hypocrisy!'
cried I; 'I see more plainly than ever that you are dishonest and
treacherous. Now at length I learn your wretched disposition. Adieu,
base creature,' said I, rising from my seat; 'I would prefer death a
thousand times rather than continue to hold the slightest communication
with you. May Heaven punish me, if I ever again waste upon you the
smallest regard! Live on with your new lover--renounce all feelings of
honour--detest me--your love is now a matter to me of utter
insignificance!'
"Manon was so terrified by the violence of my anger, that, remaining on
her knees by the chair from which I had just before risen, breathless
and trembling, she fixed her eyes upon me. I advanced a little farther
towards the door, but, unless I had lost the last spark of humanity, I
could not continue longer unmoved by such a spectacle.
"So far, indeed, was I from this kind of stoical indifference, that,
rushing at once into the very opposite extreme, I returned, or rather
flew back to her without an instant's reflection. I lifted her in my
arms; I gave her a thousand tender kisses; I implored her to pardon my
ungovernable temper; I confessed that I was an absolute brute, and
unworthy of being loved by such an angel.
"I made her sit down, and throwing myself, in my turn, upon my knees, I
conjured her to listen to me in that attitude. Then I briefly
expressed all that a submissive and impassioned lover could say most
tender and respectful. I supplicated her pardon. She let her arms fall
over my neck, as she said that it was she who stood in need of
forgiveness, and begged of me in mercy to forget all the annoyances she
had caused me, and that she began, with reason, to fear that I should
not approve of what she had to say in her justification. 'Me!' said I
interrupting her impatiently; 'I require no justification; I approve of
all you have done. It is not for me to demand excuses for anything you
do; I am but too happy, too contented, if my dear Manon will only leave
me master of her affections! But,' continued I, remembering that it
was the crisis of my fate, 'may I not, Manon, all-powerful Manon, you
who wield at your pleasure my joys and sorrows, may I not be permitted,
after having conciliated you by my submission and all the signs of
repentance, to speak to you now of my misery and distress? May I now
learn from your own lips what my destiny is to be, and whether you are
resolved to sign my death-warrant, by spending even a single night with
my rival?'
"She considered a moment before she replied. 'My good chevalier,' said
she, resuming the most tranquil tone, 'if you had only at first
explained yourself thus distinctly, you would have spared yourself a
world of trouble, and prevented a scene that has really annoyed me.
Since your distress is the result of jealousy, I could at first have
cured that by offering to accompany you where you pleased. But I
imagined it was caused by the letter which I was obliged to write in
the presence of G---- M----, and of the girl whom we sent with it. I
thought you might have construed that letter into a mockery; and have
fancied that, by sending such a messenger, I meant to announce my
abandonment of you for the sake of G---- M----. It was this idea that
at once overwhelmed me with grief; for, innocent as I knew myself to
be, I could not but allow that appearances were against me. However,'
continued she, 'I will leave you to judge of my conduct, after I shall
have explained the whole truth.'
"She then told me all that had occurred to her after joining G----
M----, whom she found punctually awaiting her arrival. He had in fact
received her in the most princely style. He showed her through all the
apartments, which were fitted up in the neatest and most correct taste.
He had counted out to her in her boudoir ten thousand francs, as well
as a quantity of jewels, amongst which were the identical pearl
necklace and bracelets which she had once before received as a present
from his father. He then led her into a splendid room, which she had
not before seen, and in which an exquisite collation was served; she
was waited upon by the new servants, whom he had hired purposely for
her, and whom he now desired to consider themselves as exclusively her
attendants; the carriage and the horses were afterwards paraded, and he
then proposed a game of cards, until supper should be announced.
"'I acknowledge,' continued Manon, 'that I was dazzled by all this
magnificence. It struck me that it would be madness to sacrifice at
once so many good things for the mere sake of carrying off the money
and the jewels already in my possession; that it was a certain fortune
made for both you and me, and that we might pass the remainder of our
lives most agreeably and comfortably at the expense of G---- M----.
"'Instead of proposing the theatre, I thought it more prudent to sound
his feelings with regard to you, in order to ascertain what facilities
we should have for meeting in future, on the supposition that I could
carry my project into effect. I found him of a most tractable
disposition. He asked me how I felt towards you, and if I had not
experienced some compunction at quitting you. I told him that you were
so truly amiable, and had ever treated me with such undeviating
kindness, that it was impossible I could hate you. He admitted that
you were a man of merit, and expressed an ardent desire to gain your
friendship.
"'He was anxious to know how I thought you would take my elopement,
particularly when you should learn that I was in his hands. I
answered, that our love was of such long standing as to have had time
to moderate a little; that, besides, you were not in very easy
circumstances, and would probably not consider my departure as any
severe misfortune, inasmuch as it would relieve you from a burden of no
very insignificant nature. I added that, being perfectly convinced you
would take the whole matter rationally, I had not hesitated to tell you
that I had some business in Paris; but you had at once consented, and
that having accompanied me yourself, you did not seem very uneasy when
we separated.
"'If I thought,' said he to me, 'that he could bring himself to live on
good terms with me, I should be too happy to make him a tender of my
services and attentions.' I assured him that, from what I knew of your
disposition, I had no doubt you would acknowledge his kindness in a
congenial spirit: especially, I added, if he could assist you in your
affairs, which had become embarrassed since your disagreement with your
family. He interrupted me by declaring, that he would gladly render
you any service in his power, and that if you were disposed to form a
new attachment, he would introduce you to an extremely pretty woman,
whom he had just given up for me.
"'I approved of all he said,' she added, 'for fear of exciting any
suspicions; and being more and more satisfied of the feasibility of my
scheme, I only longed for an opportunity of letting you into it, lest
you should be alarmed at my not keeping my appointment. With this view
I suggested the idea of sending this young lady to you, in order to
have an opportunity of writing; I was obliged to have recourse to this
plan, because I could not see a chance of his leaving me to myself for
a moment.'
"'He was greatly amused with my proposition; he called his valet, and
asking him whether he could immediately find his late mistress, he
dispatched him at once in search of her. He imagined that she would
have to go to Chaillot to meet you, but I told him that, when we
parted, I promised to meet you again at the theatre, or that, if
anything should prevent me from going there, you were to wait for me in
a coach at the end of the street of St. Andre; that consequently it
would be best to send your new love there, if it were only to save you
from the misery of suspense during the whole night. I said it would be
also necessary to write you a line of explanation, without which you
would probably be puzzled by the whole transaction. He consented; but
I was obliged to write in his presence; and I took especial care not to
explain matters too palpably in my letter.
"'This is the history,' said Manon, 'of the entire affair. I conceal
nothing from you, of either my conduct or my intentions. The girl
arrived; I thought her handsome; and as I doubted not that you would be
mortified by my absence, I did most sincerely hope that she would be
able to dissipate something of your ennui: for it is the fidelity of
the heart alone that I value. I should have been too delighted to have
sent Marcel, but I could not for a single instant find an opportunity
of telling him what I wished to communicate to you.' She finished her
story by describing the embarrassment into which M. de T----'s letter
had thrown G---- M----; 'he hesitated,' said she, 'about leaving, and
assured me that he should not be long absent; and it is on this account
that I am uneasy at seeing you here, and that I betrayed, at your
appearance, some slight feeling of surprise.'
"I listened to her with great patience. There were certainly parts of
her recital sufficiently cruel and mortifying; for the intention, at
least, of the infidelity was so obvious, that she had not even taken
the trouble to disguise it. She could never have imagined that G----
M---- meant to venerate her as a vestal. She must therefore clearly
have made up her mind to pass at least one night with him. What an
avowal for a lover's ears! However, I considered myself as partly the
cause of her guilt, by having been the first to let her know G----
M----'s sentiments towards her, and by the silly readiness with which I
entered into this rash project. Besides, by a natural bent of my mind,
peculiar I believe to myself, I was duped by the ingenuousness of her
story--by that open and winning manner with which she related even the
circumstances most calculated to annoy me. 'There is nothing of wanton
vice,' said I to myself, 'in her transgressions; she is volatile and
imprudent, but she is sincere and affectionate.' My love alone
rendered me blind to all her faults. I was enchanted at the prospect
of rescuing her that very night from my rival. I said to her: 'With
whom do you mean to pass the night?' She was evidently disconcerted by
the question, and answered me in an embarrassed manner with BUTS and
IFS.
"I felt for her, and interrupted her by saying that I at once expected
her to accompany me.
"'Nothing can give me more pleasure,' said she; 'but you don't approve
then of my project?'
"'Is it not enough,' replied I, 'that I approve of all that you have,
up to this moment, done?'
"'What,' said she, 'are we not even to take the ten thousand francs
with us? Why, he gave me the money; it is mine.'
"I advised her to leave everything, and let us think only of escaping
for although I had been hardly half an hour with her, I began to dread
the return of G---- M----. However, she so earnestly urged me to
consent to our going out with something in our pockets, that I thought
myself bound to make her, on my part, some concession, in return for
all she yielded to me.
"While we were getting ready for our departure, I heard someone knock
at the street door. I felt convinced that it must be G---- M----; and
in the heat of the moment, I told Manon, that as sure as he appeared I
would take his life. In truth, I felt that I was not sufficiently
recovered from my late excitement to be able to restrain my fury if I
met him. Marcel put an end to my uneasiness, by handing me a letter
which he had received for me at the door; it was from M. de T----.
"He told me that, as G---- M---- had gone to his father's house for the
money which he wanted, he had taken advantage of his absence to
communicate to me an amusing idea that had just come into his head;
that it appeared to him, I could not possibly take a more agreeable
revenge upon my rival, than by eating his supper, and spending the
night in the very bed which he had hoped to share with my mistress; all
this seemed to him easy enough, if I could only find two or three men
upon whom I could depend, of courage sufficient to stop him in the
street, and detain him in custody until next morning; that he would
undertake to keep him occupied for another hour at least, under some
pretext, which he could devise before G---- M----'s return.
"I showed the note to Manon; I told her at the same time of the manner
in which I had procured the interview with her. My scheme, as well as
the new one of M. de T----'s, delighted her: we laughed heartily at it
for some minutes; but when I treated it as a mere joke, I was surprised
at her insisting seriously upon it, as a thing perfectly practicable,
and too delightful to be neglected. In vain I enquired where she
thought I could possibly find, on a sudden, men fit for such an
adventure? and on whom I could rely for keeping G---- M---- in strict
custody? She said that I should at least try, as M. de T---- ensured
us yet a full hour; and as to my other objections, she said that I was
playing the tyrant, and did not show the slightest indulgence to her
fancies. She said that it was impossible there could be a more
enchanting project. 'You will have his place at supper; you will sleep
in his bed; and tomorrow, as early as you like, you can walk off with
both his mistress and his money. You may thus, at one blow, be amply
revenged upon father and son.'
"I yielded to her entreaties, in spite of the secret misgivings of my
own mind, which seemed to forebode the unhappy catastrophe that
afterwards befell me. I went out with the intention of asking two or
three guardsmen, with whom Lescaut had made me acquainted, to undertake
the arrest of G---- M----. I found only one of them at home, but he
was a fellow ripe for any adventure; and he no sooner heard our plan,
than he assured me of certain success: all he required were six
pistoles, to reward the three private soldiers whom he determined to
employ in the business. I begged of him to lose no time. He got them
together in less than a quarter of an hour. I waited at his lodgings
till he returned with them, and then conducted him to the corner of a
street through which I knew G---- M---- must pass in going back to
Manon's house. I requested him not to treat G---- M---- roughly, but
to keep him confined, and so strictly watched, until seven o'clock next
morning, that I might be free from all apprehension of his escape. He
told me his intention was to bring him a prisoner to his own room, and
make him undress and sleep in his bed, while he and his gallant
comrades should spend the night in drinking and playing.
"I remained with them until we saw G---- M---- returning homewards; and
I then withdrew a few steps into a dark recess in the street, to enjoy
so entertaining and extraordinary a scene. The officer challenged him
with a pistol to his breast, and then told him, in a civil tone, that
he did not want either his money or his life; but that if he hesitated
to follow him, or if he gave the slightest alarm, he would blow his
brains out. G---- M----, seeing that his assailant was supported by
three soldiers, and perhaps not uninfluenced by a dread of the pistol,
yielded without further resistance. I saw him led away like a lamb."
X
What lost a world, and bade a hero fly?
The timid tear in Cleopatra's eye.
Yet be the soft triumvir's fault forgiven,
By this, how many lose--not earth--but heaven!
Consign their souls to man's eternal foe,
And seal their own, to spare some wanton's, woe!
BYRON.
I soon returned to Manon; and to prevent the servants from having any
suspicion, I told her in their hearing, that she need not expect M.
G---- M---- to supper; that he was most reluctantly occupied with
business which detained him, and that he had commissioned me to come
and make his excuses, and to fill his place at the supper table; which,
in the company of so beautiful a lady, I could not but consider a very
high honour. She seconded me with her usual adroitness. We sat down
to supper. I put on the most serious air I could assume, while the
servants were in the room, and at length having got rid of them, we
passed, beyond all comparison, the most agreeable evening of my life.
I gave Marcel orders to find a hackney-coach, and engage it to be at
the gate on the following morning a little before six o'clock. I
pretended to take leave of Manon about midnight, but easily gaining
admission again, through Marcel, I proceeded to occupy G---- M----'s
bed, as I had filled his place at the supper table.
"In the meantime our evil genius was at work for our destruction. We
were like children enjoying the success of our silly scheme, while the
sword hung suspended over our heads. The thread which upheld it was
just about to break; but the better to understand all the circumstances
of our ruin, it is necessary to know the immediate cause.
"G---- M---- was followed by a servant, when he was stopped by my
friend the guardsman. Alarmed by what he saw, this fellow retraced his
steps, and the first thing he did was to go and inform old G---- M----
of what had just happened.
"Such a piece of news, of course, excited him greatly. This was his
only son; and considering the old gentleman's advanced age, he was
extremely active and ardent. He first enquired of the servant what his
son had been doing that afternoon; whether he had had any quarrel on
his own account, or interfered in any other; whether he had been in any
suspicious house. The lackey, who fancied his master in imminent
danger, and thought he ought not to have any reserve in such an
emergency, disclosed at once all that he knew of his connection with
Manon, and of the expense he had gone to on her account; the manner in
which he had passed the afternoon with her until about nine o'clock,
the circumstance of his leaving her, and the outrage he encountered on
his return. This was enough to convince him that his son's affair was a
love quarrel. Although it was then at least half-past ten at night, he
determined at once to call on the lieutenant of police. He begged of
him to issue immediate orders to all the detachments that were out on
duty, and he himself, taking some men with him, hastened to the street
where his son had been stopped: he visited every place where he thought
he might have a chance of finding him; and not being able to discover
the slightest trace of him, he went off to the house of his mistress,
to which he thought he probably might by this time have returned.
"I was stepping into bed when he arrived. The door of the chamber
being closed, I did not hear the knock at the gate, but he rushed into
the house, accompanied by two archers of the guard, and after fruitless
enquiries of the servants about his son, he resolved to try whether he
could get any information from their mistress. He came up to the
apartment, still accompanied by the guard. We were just on the point
of lying down when he burst open the door, and electrified us by his
appearance. 'Heavens!' said I to Manon, 'it is old G---- M----.' I
attempted to get possession of my sword; but it was fortunately
entangled in my belt. The archers, who saw my object, advanced to lay
hold of me. Stript to my shirt, I could, of course, offer no
resistance, and they speedily deprived me of all means of defence.
"G---- M----, although a good deal embarrassed by the whole scene, soon
recognised me; and Manon still more easily. 'Is this a dream?' said
he, in the most serious tone--'do I not see before me the Chevalier des
Grieux and Manon Lescaut?' I was so overcome with shame and
disappointment, that I could make him no reply. He appeared for some
minutes revolving different thoughts in his mind; and as if they had
suddenly excited his anger, he exclaimed, addressing himself to me:
'Wretch! I am confident that you have murdered my son!'
"I felt indignant at so insulting a charge. 'You hoary and lecherous
villain!' I exclaimed, 'if I had been inclined to kill any of your
worthless family, it is with you I should most assuredly have
commenced.'
"'Hold him fast,' cried he to the archers; 'he must give me some
tidings of my son; I shall have him hanged tomorrow, if he does not
presently let me know how he has disposed of him.'
"'You will have me hanged,' said I, 'will you? Infamous scoundrel! it
is for such as you that the gibbet is erected. Know that the blood
which flows in my veins is noble, and purer in every sense than yours.
Yes,' I added, 'I do know what has happened to your son; and if you
irritate me further, I will have him strangled before morning; and I
promise you the consolation of meeting in your own person the same
fate, after he is disposed of.'
"I was imprudent in acknowledging that I knew where his son was, but
excess of anger made me commit this indiscretion. He immediately
called in five or six other archers, who were waiting at the gate, and
ordered them to take all the servants into custody. 'Ah! ah!
Chevalier,' said he, in a tone of sardonic raillery,--'so you do know
where my son is, and you will have him strangled, you say? We will try
to set that matter to rights.'
"I now saw the folly I had committed.
"He approached Manon, who was sitting upon the bed, bathed in a flood
of tears. He said something, with the most cruel irony, of the
despotic power she wielded over old and young, father and son--her
edifying dominion over her empire. This superannuated monster of
incontinence actually attempted to take liberties with her.
"'Take care,' exclaimed I, 'how you lay a finger upon her!--neither
divine nor human law will be able, should your folly arouse it, to
shield you from my vengeance!'
"He quitted the room, desiring the archers to make us dress as quickly
as possible.
"I know not what were his intentions at that moment with regard to us;
we might perhaps have regained our liberty if we had told him where his
son was. As I dressed, I considered whether this would not be the
wisest course. But if, on quitting the room, such had been the
disposition of his mind, it was very different when he returned. He
had first gone to question Manon's servants, who were in the custody of
the guard. From those who had been expressly hired for her service by
his son, he could learn nothing; but when he found that Marcel had been
previously our servant, he determined to extract some information from
him, by means of intimidation, threats, or bribes.
"This lad was faithful, but weak and unsophisticated. The remembrance
of what he had done at the penitentiary for Manon's release, joined to
the terror with which G---- M---- now inspired him, so subdued his
mind, that he thought they were about leading him to the gallows, or
the rack. He promised that, if they would spare his life, he would
disclose everything he knew. This speech made G---- M---- imagine that
there was something more serious in the affair than he had before
supposed; he not only gave Marcel a promise of his life, but a handsome
reward in hand for his intended confession.
"The booby then told him the leading features of our plot, of which we
had made no secret before him, as he was himself to have borne a part
in it. True, he knew nothing of the alterations we had made at Paris
in our original design; but he had been informed, before quitting
Chaillot, of our projected adventure, and of the part he was to
perform. He therefore told him that the object was to make a dupe of
his son; and that Manon was to receive, if she had not already
received, ten thousand francs, which, according to our project, would
be effectually lost to G---- M----, his heirs and assigns for ever.
"Having acquired this information, the old gentleman hastened back in a
rage to the apartment. Without uttering a word, he passed into the
boudoir, where he easily put his hand upon the money and the jewels.
He then accosted us, bursting with rage; and holding up what he was
pleased to call our plunder, he loaded us with the most indignant
reproaches. He placed close to Manon's eye the pearl necklace and
bracelets. 'Do you recognise them?' said he, in a tone of mockery; 'it
is not, perhaps, the first time you may have seen them. The identical
pearls, by my faith! They were selected by your own exquisite taste!
The poor innocents!' added he; 'they really are most amiable creatures,
both one and the other; but they are perhaps a little too much inclined
to roguery.'
"I could hardly contain my indignation at this speech. I would have
given for one moment's liberty--Heavens! what would I not have given?
At length, I suppressed my feelings sufficiently to say in a tone of
moderation, which was but the refinement of rage: 'Put an end, sir, to
this insolent mockery! What is your object? What do you purpose doing
with us?'
"'M. Chevalier,' he answered, 'my object is to see you quietly lodged
in the prison of Le Chatelet. Tomorrow will bring daylight with it,
and we shall then be able to take a clearer view of matters; and I hope
you will at last do me the favour to let me know where my son is.'
"It did not require much consideration to feel convinced that our
incarceration in Le Chatelet would be a serious calamity. I foresaw
all the dangers that would ensue. In spite of my pride, I plainly saw
the necessity of bending before my fate, and conciliating my most
implacable enemy by submission. I begged of him, in the quietest
manner, to listen to me. 'I wish to do myself but common justice,
sir,' said I to him; 'I admit that my youth has led me into egregious
follies; and that you have had fair reason to complain: but if you have
ever felt the resistless power of love, if you can enter into the
sufferings of an unhappy young man, from whom all that he most loved
was ravished, you may think me perhaps not so culpable in seeking the
gratification of an innocent revenge; or at least, you may consider me
sufficiently punished, by the exposure and degradation I have just now
endured. Neither pains nor imprisonment will be requisite to make me
tell you where your son now is. He is in perfect safety. It was never
my intention to injure him, nor to give you just cause for offence. I
am ready to let you know the place where he is safely passing the
night, if, in return, you will set us at liberty.'
"The old tiger, far from being softened by my prayer, turned his back
upon me and laughed. A few words escaped him, which showed that he
perfectly well knew our whole plan from the commencement. As for his
son, the brute said that he would easily find him, since I had not
assassinated him. 'Conduct them to the Petit-Chatelet,' said he to the
archers; 'and take especial care that the chevalier does not escape
you: he is a scamp that once before escaped from St. Lazare.'
"He went out, and left me in a condition that you may picture to
yourself. 'O Heavens!' cried I to myself, 'I receive with humble
submission all your visitations; but that a wretched scoundrel should
thus have the power to tyrannise over me! this it is that plunges me
into the depths of despair!' The archers begged that we would not
detain them any longer. They had a coach at the door. 'Come, my dear
angel,' said I to Manon, as we went down, 'come, let us submit to our
destiny in all its rigour: it may one day please Heaven to render us
more happy.'
"We went in the same coach. I supported her in my arms. I had not
heard her utter a single word since G---- M----'s first appearance: but
now, finding herself alone with me, she addressed me in the tenderest
manner, and accused herself of being the cause of all my troubles. I
assured her that I never could complain, while she continued to love
me. 'It is not I that have reason to complain,' I added; 'imprisonment
for a few months has no terrors for me, and I would infinitely prefer
Le Chatelet to St. Lazare; but it is for you, my dearest soul, that my
heart bleeds. What a lot for such an angel! How can you, gracious
Heaven! subject to such rigour the most perfect work of your own hands?
Why are we not both of us born with qualities conformable to our
wretched condition? We are endowed with spirit, with taste, with
feeling; while the vilest of God's creatures--brutes, alone worthy of
our unhappy fate, are revelling in all the favours of fortune.'
"These feelings filled me with grief; but it was bliss compared with my
prospects for the future. My fear, on account of Manon, knew no
bounds. She had already been an inmate of the Magdalen; and even if
she had left it by fair means, I knew that a relapse of this nature
would be attended with disastrous consequences. I wished to let her
know my fears: I was apprehensive of exciting hers. I trembled for
her, without daring to put her on her guard against the danger; and I
embraced her tenderly, to satisfy her, at least, of my love, which was
almost the only sentiment to which I dared to give expression.
'Manon,' said I, 'tell me sincerely, will you ever cease to love me?'
"She answered, that it made her unhappy to think that I could doubt it.
"'Very well,' replied I, 'I do so no longer; and with this conviction,
I may well defy all my enemies. Through the influence of my family, I
can ensure my own liberation from the Chatelet; and my life will be of
little use, and of short duration, if I do not succeed in rescuing you.'
"We arrived at the prison, where they put us into separate cells. This
blow was the less severe, because I was prepared for it. I recommended
Manon to the attention of the porter, telling him that I was a person
of some distinction, and promising him a considerable recompense. I
embraced my dearest mistress before we parted; I implored her not to
distress herself too much, and to fear nothing while I lived. I had
money with me: I gave her some; and I paid the porter, out of what
remained, the amount of a month's expenses for both of us in, advance.
This had an excellent effect, for I found myself placed in an apartment
comfortably furnished, and they assured me that Manon was in one
equally good.
"I immediately set about devising the means of procuring my liberty.
There certainly had been nothing actually criminal in my conduct; and
supposing even that our felonious intention was established by the
evidence of Marcel, I knew that criminal intentions alone were not
punishable. I resolved to write immediately to my father, and beg of
him to come himself to Paris. I felt much less humiliation, as I have
already said, in being in Le Chatelet than in St. Lazare. Besides,
although I preserved all proper respect for the paternal authority,
age and experience had considerably lessened my timidity. I wrote, and
they made no difficulty in the prison about forwarding my letter; but
it was a trouble I should have spared myself, had I known that my
father was about to arrive on the following day in Paris. He had
received the letter I had written to him a week before; it gave him
extreme delight; but, notwithstanding the flattering hopes I had held
out of my conversion, he could not implicitly rely on my statements.
He determined therefore to satisfy himself of my reformation by the
evidence of his own senses, and to regulate his conduct towards me
according to his conviction of my sincerity. He arrived the day after
my imprisonment.
"His first visit was to Tiberge, to whose care I begged that he would
address his answer. He could not learn from him either my present
abode or condition: Tiberge merely told him of my principal adventures
since I had escaped from St. Lazare. Tiberge spoke warmly of the
disposition to virtue which I had evinced at our last interview. He
added, that he considered me as having quite got rid of Manon; but that
he was nevertheless surprised at my not having given him any
intelligence about myself for a week. My father was not to be duped.
He fully comprehended that there was something in the silence of which
Tiberge complained, which had escaped my poor friend's penetration; and
he took such pains to find me out, that in two days after his arrival
he learned that I was in Le Chatelet.
"Before I received this visit, which I little expected so soon, I had
the honour of one from the lieutenant-general of police, or, to call
things by their right names, I was subjected to an official
examination. He upbraided me certainly, but not in any harsh or
annoying manner. He told me, in the kindest tone, that he bitterly
lamented my bad conduct; that I had committed a gross indiscretion in
making an enemy of such a man as M. G---- M----; that in truth it was
easy to see that there was, in the affair, more of imprudence and folly
than of malice; but that still it was the second time I had been
brought as a culprit under his cognisance; and that he had hoped I
should have become more sedate, after the experience of two or three
months in St. Lazare.
"Delighted at finding that I had a rational judge to deal with, I
explained the affair to him in a manner at once so respectful and so
moderate, that he seemed exceedingly satisfied with my answers to all
the queries he put. He desired me not to abandon myself to grief, and
assured me that he felt every disposition to serve me, as well on
account of my birth as my inexperience. I ventured to bespeak his
attentions in favour of Manon, and I dwelt upon her gentle and
excellent disposition. He replied, with a smile, that he had not yet
seen her, but that she had been represented to him as a most dangerous
person. This expression so excited my sympathy, that I urged a
thousand anxious arguments in favour of my poor mistress, and I could
not restrain even from shedding tears.
"He desired them to conduct me back to my chamber. 'Love! love!' cried
this grave magistrate as I went out, 'thou art never to be reconciled
with discretion!'
"I had been occupied with the most melancholy reflections, and was
thinking of the conversation I had had with the lieutenant-general of
police, when I heard my door open. It was my father. Although I ought
to have been half prepared for seeing him, and had reasons to expect
his arrival within a day or two, yet I was so thunderstruck, that I
could willingly have sunk into the earth, if it had been open at my
feet. I embraced him in the greatest possible state of confusion. He
took a seat, without either one or other of us having uttered a word.
"As I remained standing, with my head uncovered, and my eyes cast on
the ground, 'Be seated, sir,' said he in a solemn voice; 'be seated. I
have to thank the notoriety of your debaucheries for learning the place
of your abode. It is the privilege of such fame as yours, that it
cannot lie concealed. You are acquiring celebrity by an unerring path.
Doubtless it will lead you to the Greve,[1] and you will then have the
unfading glory of being held up to the admiration of the world.'
"I made no reply. He continued: 'What an unhappy lot is that of a
father, who having tenderly loved a child, and strained every nerve to
bring him up a virtuous and respectable man, finds him turn out in the
end a worthless profligate, who dishonours him. To an ordinary reverse
of fortune one may be reconciled; time softens the affliction, and even
the indulgence of sorrow itself is not unavailing; but what remedy is
there for an evil that is perpetually augmenting, such as the
profligacy of a vicious son, who has deserted every principle of
honour, and is ever plunging from deep into deeper vice? You are
silent,' added he: 'look at this counterfeit modesty, this hypocritical
air of gentleness!-- might he not pass for the most respectable member
of his family?'
"Although I could not but feel that I deserved, in some degree, these
reproaches, yet he appeared to me to carry them beyond all reason. I
thought I might be permitted to explain my feelings.
"'I assure you, sir,' said I to him, 'that the modesty which you
ridicule is by no means affected; it is the natural feeling of a son
who entertains sincere respect for his father, and above all, a father
irritated as you justly are by his faults. Neither have I, sir, the
slightest wish to pass for the most respectable member of my family. I
know that I have merited your reproaches, but I conjure you to temper
them with mercy, and not to look upon me as the most infamous of
mankind. I do not deserve such harsh names. It is love, you know it,
that has caused all my errors. Fatal passion! Have you yourself never
felt its force? Is it possible that you, with the same blood in your
veins that flows in mine, should have passed through life unscathed by
the same excitements? Love has rendered me perhaps foolishly
tender--too easily excited--too impassioned--too faithful, and
probably too indulgent to the desires and caprices, or, if you will,
the faults of an adored mistress. These are my crimes; are they such
as to reflect dishonour upon you? Come, my dear father,' said I
tenderly, 'show some pity for a son, who has never ceased to feel
respect and affection for you--who has not renounced, as you say, all
feelings of honour and of duty, and who is himself a thousand times
more an object of pity than you imagine.' I could not help shedding a
tear as I concluded this appeal.
"A father's heart is a chef-d'oeuvre of creation. There nature rules
in undisturbed dominion, and regulates at will its most secret springs.
He was a man of high feeling and good taste, and was so sensibly
affected by the turn I had given to my defence, that he could no longer
hide from me the change I had wrought.
"'Come to me, my poor chevalier,' said he; 'come and embrace me. I do
pity you!'
"I embraced him: he pressed me to him in such a manner, that I guessed
what was passing in his heart.
"'But how are we,' said he, 'to extricate you from this place? Explain
to me the real situation of your affairs.'
"As there really was not anything in my conduct so grossly improper as
to reflect dishonour upon me; at least, in comparison with the conduct
of other young men of a certain station in the world; and as a mistress
is not considered a disgrace, any more than a little dexterity in
drawing some advantage from play, I gave my father a candid detail of
the life I had been leading. As I recounted each transgression, I took
care to cite some illustrious example in my justification, in order to
palliate my own faults.
"'I lived,' said I, 'with a mistress without the solemnity of marriage.
The Duke of ---- keeps two before the eyes of all Paris. M---- D----
has had one now for ten years, and loves her with a fidelity which he
has never shown to his wife. Two-thirds of the men of fashion in Paris
keep mistresses.
"'I certainly have on one or two occasions cheated at play. Well, the
Marquis of ---- and the Count ---- have no other source of revenue.
The Prince of ---- and the Duke of ---- are at the head of a gang of
the same industrious order.' As for the designs I had upon the pockets
of the two G---- M----s, I might just as easily have proved that I had
abundant models for that also; but I had too much pride to plead guilty
to this charge, and rest on the justification of example; so that I
begged of my father to ascribe my weakness on this occasion to the
violence of the two passions which agitated me--Revenge and Love.
"He asked me whether I could suggest any means of obtaining my liberty,
and in such a way as to avoid publicity as much as possible. I told
him of the kind feelings which the lieutenant-general of police had
expressed towards me. 'If you encounter any obstacles,' said I, 'they
will be offered only by the two G---- M----s; so that I think it would
be advisable to call upon them.'
"He promised to do so.
"I did not dare ask him to solicit Manon's liberation; this was not
from want of courage, but from the apprehension of exasperating him by
such a proposition, and perhaps driving him to form some design fatal
to the future happiness of us both. It remains to this hour a problem
whether this fear on my part was not the immediate cause of all my most
terrible misfortunes, by preventing me from ascertaining my father's
disposition, and endeavouring to inspire him with favourable feelings
towards my poor mistress: I might have perhaps once more succeeded in
exciting his commiseration; I might have put him on his guard against
the impression which he was sure of receiving from a visit to old G----
M----. But how can I tell what the consequences would have been! My
unhappy fate would have most probably counteracted all my efforts; but
it would have been a consolation to have had nothing else but that, and
the cruelty of my enemies, to blame for my afflictions.
"On quitting me, my father went to pay a visit to M. G---- M----. He
found him with his son, whom the guardsman had safely restored to
liberty. I never learned the particulars of their conversation; but I
could easily infer them from the disastrous results. They went
together (the two old gentlemen) to the lieutenant-general of police,
from whom they requested one favour each: the first was to have me at
once liberated from Le Chatelet; the second to condemn Manon to
perpetual imprisonment, or to transport her for life to America. They
happened, at that very period, to be sending out a number of convicts
to the Mississippi. The lieutenant-general promised to have her
embarked on board the first vessel that sailed.
"M. G---- M---- and my father came together to bring me the news of my
liberation. M. G---- M---- said something civil with reference to what
had passed; and having congratulated me upon my happiness in having
such a father, he exhorted me to profit henceforward by his instruction
and example. My father desired me to express my sorrow for the
injustice I had even contemplated against his family, and my gratitude
for his having assisted in procuring my liberation.
"We all left the prison together, without the mention of Manon's name.
I dared not in their presence speak of her to the turnkeys. Alas! all
my entreaties in her favour would have been useless. The cruel
sentence upon Manon had arrived at the same time as the warrant for my
discharge. The unfortunate girl was conducted in an hour after to the
Hospital, to be there classed with some other wretched women, who had
been condemned to the same punishment.
"My father having forced me to accompany him to the house where he was
residing, it was near six o'clock before I had an opportunity of
escaping his vigilance. In returning to Le Chatelet, my only wish was
to convey some refreshments to Manon, and to recommend her to the
attention of the porter; for I had no hope of being permitted to see
her; nor had I, as yet, had time to reflect on the best means of
rescuing her.
"I asked for the porter. I had won his heart, as much by my liberality
to him, as by the mildness of my manner; so that, having a disposition
to serve me, he spoke of Manon's sentence as a calamity which he
sincerely regretted, since it was calculated to mortify me. I was at
first unable to comprehend his meaning. We conversed for some minutes
without my understanding him. At length perceiving that an explanation
was necessary, he gave me such a one, as on a former occasion I wanted
courage to relate to you, and which, even now, makes my blood curdle in
my veins to remember."
[1] Who has e'er been at Paris must needs know the Greve,
The fatal retreat of th' unfortunate brave,
Where honour and justice most oddly contribute,
To ease heroes' pains by the halter and gibbet.--PRIOR.