'The more you lead me up to Christ in all things, the more highly shall I
esteem you; and if it be possible to love you more than I do now, the
more shall I love you. You are always present in my thoughts.'
Now you must not think that, even in these early days, our General had a
very easy life. He was often much perplexed and troubled, longing above
all to do God's Will for the Salvation of the people, and yet not quite
sure what that Will was. At these times Catherine was of untold help to
him.
Once he was very unsettled--not certain whether he should remain away in
the North of England, or accept a place in London, where the two could
often meet. Most girls would have said, 'Oh, come, then we shall be near
to each other'; but you will see that her advice to him is just as
suitable for you when you are not certain of your duty--that she does not
consider her own feelings at all.
'I wish,' she writes, 'you prayed more and talked less about the matter.
Try it, and be determined to get clear and settled views as to your
course. Leave your heart before God, and get satisfied in His sight, and
then do it, be it what it may. I cannot bear the idea of your being
unhappy. Pray do in this as you feel in your soul it will be right. My
conscience is no standard for yours.'