I. CHODOREILLE THE GREAT.

A young man has forsaken his natal city in the depths of one of the

departments, rather clearly marked by M. Charles Dupin. He felt that

glory of some sort awaited him: suppose that of a painter, a novelist, a

journalist, a poet, a great statesman.

Young Adolphe de Chodoreille--that we may be perfectly

understood--wished to be talked about, to become celebrated, to

be somebody. This, therefore, is addressed to the mass of aspiring

individuals brought to Paris by all sorts of vehicles, whether moral

or material, and who rush upon the city one fine morning with the

hydrophobic purpose of overturning everybody’s reputation, and of

building themselves a pedestal with the ruins they are to make,--until

disenchantment follows. As our intention is to specify this peculiarity

so characteristic of our epoch, let us take from among the various

personages the one whom the author has elsewhere called _A Distinguished

Provencal_.

Adolphe has discovered that the most admirable trade is that which

consists in buying a bottle of ink, a bunch of quills, and a ream of

paper, at a stationer’s for twelve francs and a half, and in selling

the two thousand sheets in the ream over again, for something like fifty

thousand francs, after having, of course, written upon each leaf fifty

lines replete with style and imagination.

This problem,--twelve francs and a half metamorphosed into fifty

thousand francs, at the rate of five sous a line--urges numerous

families who might advantageously employ their members in the retirement

of the provinces, to thrust them into the vortex of Paris.

The young man who is the object of this exportation, invariably passes

in his natal town for a man of as much imagination as the most famous

author. He has always studied well, he writes very nice poetry, he is

considered a fellow of parts: he is besides often guilty of a charming

tale published in the local paper, which obtains the admiration of the

department.

His poor parents will never know what their son has come to Paris to

learn at great cost, namely: That it is difficult to be a writer and to

understand the French language short of a dozen years of heculean labor:

That a man must have explored every sphere of social life, to become

a genuine novelist, inasmuch as the novel is the private history

of nations: That the great story-tellers, Aesop, Lucian, Boccaccio,

Rabelais, Cervantes, Swift, La Fontaine, Lesage, Sterne, Voltaire,

Walter Scott, the unknown Arabians of the _Thousand and One Nights_,

were all men of genius as well as giants of erudition.

Their Adolphe serves his literary apprenticeship in two or three

coffee-houses, becomes a member of the Society of Men of Letters,

attacks, with or without reason, men of talent who don’t read his

articles, assumes a milder tone on seeing the powerlessness of his

criticisms, offers novelettes to the papers which toss them from one to

the other as if they were shuttlecocks: and, after five or six years of

exercises more or less fatiguing, of dreadful privations which seriously

tax his parents, he attains a certain position.

This position may be described as follows: Thanks to a sort of

reciprocal support extended to each other, and which an ingenious writer

has called “Mutual Admiration,” Adolphe often sees his name cited among

the names of celebrities, either in the prospectuses of the book-trade,

or in the lists of newspapers about to appear. Publishers print the

title of one of his works under the deceitful heading “IN PRESS,” which

might be called the typographical menagerie of bears.[*] Chodoreille is

sometimes mentioned among the promising young men of the literary world.

[*] A bear (_ours_) is a play which has been refused by a

multitude of theatres, but which is finally represented at a

time when some manager or other feels the need of one. The

word has necessarily passed from the language of the stage

into the jargon of journalism, and is applied to novels

which wander the streets in search of a publisher.

For eleven years Adolphe Chodoreille remains in the ranks of the

promising young men: he finally obtains a free entrance to the theatres,

thanks to some dirty work or certain articles of dramatic criticism:

he tries to pass for a good fellow; and as he loses his illusions

respecting glory and the world of Paris, he gets into debt and his years

begin to tell upon him.

A paper which finds itself in a tight place asks him for one of his

bears revised by his friends. This has been retouched and revamped every

five years, so that it smells of the pomatum of each prevailing and then

forgotten fashion. To Adolphe it becomes what the famous cap, which

he was constantly staking, was to Corporal Trim, for during five years

“Anything for a Woman” (the title decided upon) “will be one of the most

entertaining productions of our epoch.”

After eleven years, Chodoreille is regarded as having written some

respectable things, five or six tales published in the dismal magazines,

in ladies’ newspapers, or in works intended for children of tender age.

As he is a bachelor, and possesses a coat and a pair of black cassimere

trousers, and when he pleases may thus assume the appearance of an

elegant diplomat, and as he is not without a certain intelligent air, he

is admitted to several more or less literary salons: he bows to the five

or six academicians who possess genius, influence or talent, he visits

two or three of our great poets, he allows himself, in coffee-rooms,

to call the two or three justly celebrated women of our epoch by their

Christian names; he is on the best of terms with the blue stockings of

the second grade,--who ought to be called _socks_,--and he shakes hands

and takes glasses of absinthe with the stars of the smaller newspapers.

Such is the history of every species of ordinary men--men who have been

denied what they call good luck. This good luck is nothing less than

unyielding will, incessant labor, contempt for an easily won celebrity,

immense learning, and that patience which, according to Buffon, is the

whole of genius, but which certainly is the half of it.

You do not yet see any indication of a petty trouble for Caroline. You

imagine that this history of five hundred young men engaged at this

moment in wearing smooth the paving stones of Paris, was written as a

sort of warning to the families of the eighty-six departments of

France: but read these two letters which lately passed between two girls

differently married, and you will see that it was as necessary as the

narrative by which every true melodrama was until lately expected to

open. You will divine the skillful manoeuvres of the Parisian peacock

spreading his tail in the recesses of his native village, and polishing

up, for matrimonial purposes, the rays of his glory, which, like those

of the sun, are only warm and brilliant at a distance.

From Madame Claire de la Roulandiere, nee Jugault, to Madame Adolphe de

Chodoreille, nee Heurtaut.

“VIVIERS.

“You have not yet written to me, and it’s real unkind in you. Don’t

you remember that the happier was to write first and to console her who

remained in the country?

“Since your departure for Paris, I have married Monsieur de la

Roulandiere, the president of the tribunal. You know him, and you can

judge whether I am happy or not, with my heart _saturated_, as it is,

with our ideas. I was not ignorant what my lot would be: I live with

the ex-president, my husband’s uncle, and with my mother-in-law, who has

preserved nothing of the ancient parliamentary society of Aix but its

pride and its severity of manners. I am seldom alone, I never go out

unless accompanied by my mother-in-law or my husband. We receive the

heavy people of the city in the evening. They play whist at two sous a

point, and I listen to conversations of this nature:

“‘Monsieur Vitremont is dead, and leaves two hundred and eighty thousand

francs,’ says the associate judge, a young man of forty-seven, who is as

entertaining as a northwest wind.

“‘Are you quite sure of that?’

“The _that_ refers to the two hundred and eighty thousand francs. A

little judge then holds forth, he runs over the investments, the others

discuss their value, and it is definitely settled that if he has not

left two hundred and eighty thousand, he left something near it.

“Then comes a universal concert of eulogy heaped upon the dead man’s

body, for having kept his bread under lock and key, for having shrewdly

invested his little savings accumulated sou by sou, in order, probably,

that the whole city and those who expect legacies may applaud and

exclaim in admiration, ‘He leaves two hundred and eighty thousand

francs!’ Now everybody has rich relations of whom they say ‘Will he

leave anything like it?’ and thus they discuss the quick as they have

discussed the dead.

“They talk of nothing but the prospects of fortune, the prospects of a

vacancy in office, the prospects of the harvest.

“When we were children, and used to look at those pretty little white

mice, in the cobbler’s window in the rue St. Maclou, that turned and

turned the circular cage in which they were imprisoned, how far I was

from thinking that they would one day be a faithful image of my life!

“Think of it, my being in this condition!--I who fluttered my wings so

much more than you, I whose imagination was so vagabond! My sins have

been greater than yours, and I am the more severely punished. I have

bidden farewell to my dreams: I am _Madame la Presidente_ in all my

glory, and I resign myself to giving my arm for forty years to my

big awkward Roulandiere, to living meanly in every way, and to having

forever before me two heavy brows and two wall-eyes pierced in a yellow

face, which is destined never to know what it is to smile.

“But you, Caroline dear, you who, between ourselves, were admitted among

the big girls while I still gamboled among the little ones, you whose

only sin was pride, you,--at the age of twenty-seven, and with a dowry

of two hundred thousand francs,--capture and captivate a truly great

man, one of the wittiest men in Paris, one of the two talented men that

our village has produced.--What luck!

“You now circulate in the most brilliant society of Paris. Thanks to the

sublime privileges of genius. You may appear in all the salons of the

Faubourg St. Germain, and be cordially received. You have the exquisite

enjoyment of the company of the two or three celebrated women of our

age, where so many good things are said, where the happy speeches which

arrive out here like Congreve rockets, are first fired off. You go to

the Baron Schinner’s of whom Adolphe so often spoke to us, whom all the

great artists and foreigners of celebrity visit. In short, before long,

you will be one of the queens of Paris, if you wish. You can receive,

too, and have at your house the lions of literature, fashion and

finance, whether male or female, for Adolphe spoke in such terms about

his illustrious friendships and his intimacy with the favorites of the

hour, that I imagine you giving and receiving honors.

“With your ten thousand francs a year, and the legacy from your Aunt

Carabas, added to the twenty thousand francs that your husband earns,

you must keep a carriage; and since you go to all the theatres without

paying, since journalists are the heroes of all the inaugurations so

ruinous for those who keep up with the movement of Paris, and since they

are constantly invited to dinner, you live as if you had an income of

sixty thousand francs a year! Happy Caroline! I don’t wonder you forget

me!

“I can understand how it is that you have not a moment to yourself. Your

bliss is the cause of your silence, so I pardon you. Still, if, fatigued

with so many pleasures, you one day, upon the summit of your grandeur,

think of your poor Claire, write to me, tell me what a marriage with a

great man is, describe those great Parisian ladies, especially those

who write. Oh! I should _so_ much like to know what they are made of!

Finally don’t forget anything, unless you forget that you are loved, as

ever, by your poor

“CLAIRE JUGAULT.”

From Madame Adolphe de Chodoreille to Madame la Presidente de la

Roulandiere, at Viviers.

“PARIS.

“Ah! my poor Claire, could you have known how many wretched little

griefs your innocent letter would awaken, you never would have written

it. Certainly no friend, and not even an enemy, on seeing a woman with a

thousand mosquito-bites and a plaster over them, would amuse herself by

tearing it off and counting the stings.

“I will begin by telling you that for a woman of twenty-seven, with a

face still passable, but with a form a little too much like that of the

Emperor Nicholas for the humble part I play, I am happy! Let me tell you

why: Adolphe, rejoicing in the deceptions which have fallen upon me

like a hail-storm, smoothes over the wounds in my self-love by so much

affection, so many attentions, and such charming things, that, in good

truth, women--so far as they are simply women--would be glad to find

in the man they marry defects so advantageous. But all men of letters

(Adolphe, alas! is barely a man of letters), who are beings not a bit

less irritable, nervous, fickle and eccentric than women, are far from

possessing such solid qualities as those of Adolphe, and I hope they

have not all been as unfortunate as he.

“Ah! Claire, we love each other well enough for me to tell you

the simple truth. I have saved my husband, dear, from profound but

skillfully concealed poverty. Far from receiving twenty thousand francs

a year, he has not earned that sum in the entire fifteen years that he

has been at Paris. We occupy a third story in the rue Joubert, and pay

twelve hundred francs for it; we have some eighty-five hundred francs

left, with which I endeavor to keep house honorably.

“I have brought Adolphe luck; for since our marriage, he has obtained

the control of a feuilleton which is worth four hundred francs a month

to him, though it takes but a small portion of his time. He owes this

situation to an investment. We employed the seventy thousand francs left

me by my Aunt Carabas in giving security for a newspaper; on this we get

nine per cent, and we have stock besides. Since this transaction, which

was concluded some ten months ago, our income has doubled, and we now

possess a competence, I can complain of my marriage in a pecuniary

point of view no more than as regards my affections. My vanity alone

has suffered, and my ambition has been swamped. You will understand the

various petty troubles which have assailed me, by a single specimen.

“Adolphe, you remember, appeared to us on intimate terms with the famous

Baroness Schinner, so renowned for her wit, her influence, her wealth

and her connection with celebrated men. I supposed that he was welcomed

at her house as a friend: my husband presented me, and I was coldly

received. I saw that her rooms were furnished with extravagant luxury;

and instead of Madame Schinner’s returning my call, I received a card,

twenty days afterward, and at an insolently improper hour.

“On arriving at Paris, I went to walk upon the boulevard, proud of my

anonymous great man. He nudged me with his elbow, and said, pointing out

a fat little ill-dressed man, ‘There’s so and so!’ He mentioned one of

the seven or eight illustrious men in France. I got ready my look of

admiration, and I saw Adolphe rapturously doffing his hat to the truly

great man, who replied by the curt little nod that you vouchsafe a

person with whom you have doubtless exchanged hardly four words in ten

years. Adolphe had begged a look for my sake. ‘Doesn’t he know you?’

I said to my husband. ‘Oh, yes, but he probably took me for somebody

else,’ replied he.

“And so of poets, so of celebrated musicians, so of statesmen. But, as

a compensation, we stop and talk for ten minutes in front of some

arcade or other, with Messieurs Armand du Cantal, George Beaunoir, Felix

Verdoret, of whom you have never heard. Mesdames Constantine Ramachard,

Anais Crottat, and Lucienne Vouillon threaten me with their _blue_

friendship. We dine editors totally unknown in our province. Finally I

have had the painful happiness of seeing Adolphe decline an invitation

to an evening party to which I was not bidden.

“Oh! Claire dear, talent is still the rare flower of spontaneous growth,

that no greenhouse culture can produce. I do not deceive myself: Adolphe

is an ordinary man, known, estimated as such: he has no other chance,

as he himself says, than to take his place among the _utilities_ of

literature. He was not without wit at Viviers: but to be a man of wit at

Paris, you must possess every kind of wit in formidable doses.

“I esteem Adolphe: for, after some few fibs, he frankly confessed his

position, and, without humiliating himself too deeply, he promised that

I should be happy. He hopes, like numerous other ordinary men, to

obtain some place, that of an assistant librarian, for instance, or

the pecuniary management of a newspaper. Who knows but we may get him

elected deputy for Viviers, in the course of time?

“We live in obscurity; we have five or six friends of either sex whom we

like, and such is the brilliant style of life which your letter gilded

with all the social splendors.

“From time to time I am caught in a squall, or am the butt of some

malicious tongue. Thus, yesterday, at the opera, I heard one of our most

ill-natured wits, Leon de Lora, say to one of our most famous critics,

‘It takes Chodoreille to discover the Caroline poplar on the banks of

the Rhone!’ They had heard my husband call me by my Christian name. At

Viviers I was considered handsome. I am tall, well made, and fat enough

to satisfy Adolphe! In this way I learn that the beauty of women from

the country is, at Paris, precisely like the wit of country gentleman.

“In short, I am absolutely nobody, if that is what you wish to know: but

if you desire to learn how far my philosophy goes, understand that I am

really happy in having found an ordinary man in my pretended great one.

“Farewell, dear Claire! It is still I, you see, who, in spite of my

delusions and the petty troubles of my life, am the most favorably

situated: for Adolphe is young, and a charming fellow.

“CAROLINE HEURTAUT.”

Claire’s reply contained, among other passages, the following: “I hope

that the indescribable happiness which you enjoy, will continue, thanks

to your philosophy.” Claire, as any intimate female friend would have

done, consoled herself for her president by insinuations respecting

Adolphe’s prospects and future conduct.

Petty Troubles of Married Life, Complete · 第 33 / 56 题