then with slow and careful aim, he threw hot roast potato number three
down the alligator's throat.
"Wow! Wow! Wow!" yelled the skillery-scalery creature, and then,
fairly boiling inside, he turned a big backward somersault, standing
up on the end of his double-jointed tail, and he ran off to find some
iced water with which to cool himself.
"Ha! That's the time you saved my life with the roast potatoes. They
were just fine!" cried the red monkey. Then he and Uncle Wiggily
traveled on, and the alligator didn't bother them any more that day,
being so busy drinking iced water.
But they had another adventure soon, and I'll tell it to you a little
later, when the story will be about Uncle Wiggily and Buddy Pigg--that
is if the goldfish doesn't get caught in the mosquito net and tear a
hole in it for the June bugs to come in and read the fly-paper.
Illustration: Uncle Wiggily and the Potatoes
------------------------------------------------------------------------
STORY XXII
UNCLE WIGGILY AND BUDDY PIGG
Uncle Wiggily and the red monkey were going slowly along through the
woods. It was the day after the alligator had started to eat up the
little red monkey, but he had to stop when the old gentleman rabbit
threw hot roast potatoes down his skillery-scalery throat.
"Do you think you will find your fortune to-day?" asked the monkey, as
he tossed up a stone and caught it as it came down. You see he had
lost the cocoanut he used to have that time when it hit the alligator.
"Well, I can't say for sure," replied Uncle Wiggily. "I hope I may
find some gold or diamonds, so I can get rich and go back home. But
you can never tell what is going to happen in this world, not even
whether you are going to have an ice-cream cone or not; no, indeed,
and a stick of peppermint candy besides."
"I tell you what it is," said the red monkey, slow and
thoughtful-like, as he scratched his stubby black nose with a piece of
straw. "I don't believe you have looked in the right places for your
fortune, Uncle Wiggily."
"Why, nonsensicalness!" exclaimed the old gentleman rabbit. "I look in
every place I can think of. I look on the ground, and under stones,
and behind stumps, and down holes, and alongside of rail fences. But I
haven't found any gold or diamonds yet."
"Exactly," spoke the red monkey. "But did you ever look up a tree for
them?"
"Once I did," said the rabbit. "I threw up a stone with some molasses
and a string to it to get some gold. But the stone went in an owl's
hole, I think. That's all the luck I ever had."
"Then I'm going to look up some more trees for you," went on the
monkey. "I am a good climber, and perhaps I may have better luck. Hop
along lively now and maybe we will find your fortune before
breakfast."
So the two friends went along together, and every once in a while the
monkey would climb a tree. The first one he scrambled up was a maple
tree, and he hoped he might find some maple sugar hanging on the
branches, but it wasn't time for maple sugar. Anyhow, you remember
that this kind of sugar comes from the inside of a tree and not the
outside. They take the tree juice and boil it in the spring of the
year, you know, and that makes maple sugar.
The next tree the monkey went up was a hickory nut tree, and there
were some nuts on it, but they weren't ripe yet, and when he ate one
it was so bitter that he had to make a funny face. And Uncle Wiggily,
who was on the ground, happened to see the monkey's funny face, and
the old gentleman rabbit laughed so hard that he dropped his valise.
The valise came open and out fell a piece of cherry pie, and when the
monkey saw this he laughed. He laughed so hard that he shook the tree,
and a whole lot of green hickory nuts fell down, and two of them
struck Uncle Wiggily on the end of his twinkling nose, making him
sneeze forty-'leven times.
Then the monkey was sorry, and he scrambled to the ground without
having found any gold or diamond fortunes. He said he was sorry that
Uncle Wiggily was hurt.
"Pray do not mention it," spoke the rabbit, politely. "It was partly
my fault. Let us hurry on."
"No, let's eat breakfast first," suggested the monkey; so they sat
down and ate the cherry pie, after brushing off the dirt, and really
it wasn't damaged hardly any.
Well, then they traveled on again, and the next tree which the monkey
climbed was a pine tree, and on it were long pine cones, something
like brown bananas, but not very good to eat. The monkey began picking
them, and Uncle Wiggily called out:
"Have you found any fortune for me?"
"No," said the red monkey, sadly, "I haven't, but we can have a game
of baseball with these cones when I come down. Look out, I'm going to
toss some to you."
Uncle Wiggily got safely out of the way behind a big stone, and the
red monkey tossed down a number of the long, brown pine cones. And
just as the first of them were nearing the ground a most surprising
thing happened. Out from the woods came a big black bear, and he
walked toward the tree in which the monkey was, just in time to be hit
on the end of his soft and tender nose by the sharp pine cones which
the monkey threw.
"Wow!" cried the bear. "Who did that?"
Well, of course, Uncle Wiggily wasn't going to say that he had done
it, for he hadn't, so the rabbit just crouched down behind the rock,
and waited to see what would happen.
And the monkey hadn't seen the bear, so he threw down some more pine
cones, and land sakes flopsy dub and a potato pancake! one of the
cones hit the bear on his soft nose again!
"Wow! Wow!" cried the bear once more. "Who did that?"
And this time he happened to look up, and there he saw the poor red
monkey up in the pine tree.
"Ah, ha! It's you, is it?" growled the bear. "Now, just for that I'm
going to climb up there and eat you."
"Oh, please don't!" begged the monkey. "It was all a mistake. I didn't
mean to do it!"
"Well, there won't be any mistake about this!" growled the bear. "Here
I come!" And up he climbed, for bears can climb a tree better than can
a cat.
Well, you can just imagine how scared that monkey was. He was so
frightened that he didn't think to run to the top of the pine tree,
and jump into another, so he could get away. Instead he just sat there
on a limb, shivering. And Uncle Wiggily was also frightened as he hid
behind the stone.
"The poor monkey will be eaten up," thought the rabbit, "and it will
be my fault, because he was looking for my fortune. Oh! what can I
do?"
And just then Uncle Wiggily heard a rustling in the leaves at his
feet. He jumped back, thinking it might be a little baby bear, but,
instead out pounced a tiny brown and white chap without any tail.
"Why, Buddy Pigg!" exclaimed the rabbit. "How does it happen that you
are here?"
"I'm just walking about for exercise," said the guinea-pig boy, for he
it was. "But what is the trouble, Uncle Wiggily?"
"The bear is going to eat up the red monkey," said the old gentleman
rabbit, sadly. "Look!"
Buddy Pigg looked, and by this time the bear had almost climbed up to
where the monkey was sitting and shivering.
"Oh, I must stop that!" exclaimed Buddy. "Wait a minute and watch. You
know how I can whistle, don't you? so listen."
Now, you know all guinea pigs can make a funny, squeaking noise just
like some one whistling, and that's exactly what Buddy did. He
whistled loudly and he whistled softly through his teeth. Then he
whistled double and single and next he whistled like a man calling to
his dog.
And that's exactly what the bear thought it was--a man whistling for
the dogs to come and bite the bear. Louder whistled Buddy through his
teeth, hiding down behind the rock with Uncle Wiggily, and the bear
was very much frightened.
"I guess the dogs are coming for me!" the bear exclaimed, and he
stopped climbing up the tree. Then he called to the monkey: "I'll get
you some other time." Then the bear slid down the tree and ran off in
the woods, while Buddy whistled louder than ever. And then the monkey
came safely down, and he wasn't eaten by the bear, after all, and
that's all to this story, if you please.
The next one will be about Uncle Wiggily and Munchie Trot, the pony
boy--that is if the automobile horn doesn't stick in the lace curtains
and scare the fish cakes so that they bite the mashed potatoes.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
STORY XXIII
UNCLE WIGGILY AND MUNCHIE TROT
"Weren't you frightened when you were up in the tree and the bear was
coming after you?" asked Buddy Pigg of the red monkey, as he and Uncle
Wiggily were walking along, after the adventure that I told you about
last night.
"Frightened? I should say I was!" exclaimed the monkey. "I thought I'd
never get down again to help look for Uncle Wiggily's fortune. I never
can thank you enough for whistling and scaring that savage bear. How
do you do it?"
"Oh, it is very simple," said the guinea pig boy, as he modestly
looked down at the ground. "It's this way."
Then he whistled through his teeth again, slowly and faster, just to
show how it was done.
"I wish I could learn how to do that," said the monkey. "If I ever get
caught up a tree again by a bear I could whistle for myself, and make
believe some hunter's dogs were coming to help me."
"I'll show you," said Buddy Pigg, and he told the monkey how to put
his tongue against his teeth and how to blow through his lips. Well,
the red monkey tried it, and he tried again, but he couldn't seem to
whistle.
"Perhaps if I stand on my head I could do better," he said, and in a
moment there he was standing on his head and trying to whistle upside
down. But still he couldn't do it.
"Try hanging by your tail," suggested Buddy Pigg, and the little red
chap did so, but still it was of no use. He hung there by his tail so
long that Uncle Wiggily was afraid the monkey's head might fall off,
so he made him get down.
Then the red chap tried again and again, but he couldn't whistle a
bit, and at last the old gentleman rabbit said:
"I believe I know what the trouble is."
"What?" asked Buddy.
"Why, you see you have no tail, Buddy, and you are a good whistler,"
went on the rabbit, for you know it's really so--guinea pigs have no
tails--though I'm not allowed to tell you the reason just yet.
"You have no tail, and you are a good whistler," said the rabbit
again, "but the monkey has a long tail, and he can't seem to whistle a
bit. The tail must make all the difference. Just cut off your tail,
red monkey, and you'll whistle."
"Yes, I guess I would!" exclaimed the monkey, surprised-like. "I'd cry
too, and feel very badly. No, if I have to lose my tail to whistle
I'll never do it. I know what I can do instead."
"What?" asked Buddy Pigg.
"I can hire a green parrot to whistle for me," said the monkey.
"Parrots can whistle for real or make-believe dogs as good as a man
can. I'll take a parrot with me, and he'll scare the bears."
"Very good," said Uncle Wiggily, "for I would not like to see you lose
your tail."
So, the three friends traveled on for some distance until it was time
for Buddy Pigg to go home. And with him Uncle Wiggily sent his love to
all his friends and to Sammie and Susie Littletail also.
"Well, we don't seem to be finding your fortune very fast," spoke the
red monkey after they had climbed up one hill, and part of another
one, and had looked under a lot of stones and behind several stumps.
"No, I guess we won't find it to-day," said the rabbit. It was now
getting on toward afternoon, and Uncle Wiggily began thinking of where
he would spend the night.
"I know what to do," said the red monkey. "I'll make a little house
here in the woods, and we'll stay in that. We'll build a fire, and
make believe we are camping out. And, while I am making the house out
of sticks and leaves, you can walk around and look for your fortune."
"Very good," said the old gentleman rabbit, and so he started off,
leaving the monkey to make the house in the woods. Uncle Wiggily
walked on and on, but he didn't find his fortune, and it was getting
rather late. He was just about to start back to where he had left the
red monkey, when all of a sudden he heard a crying in the woods.
"Ha! I know what that is!" exclaimed the rabbit. "That is a baby fox,
and near him is the old papa fox, who wants to catch and eat me. I'll
not go near him, but I'll hurry home."
So he started toward the monkey's house, but the crying became louder,
and the rabbit thought that perhaps, after all, it might not be a baby
fox. And then, before he could twinkle his nose more than seven times,
there was a rustling in the bushes, and out came a little boy
squirrel. One of his legs was broken, and he was limping along on a
piece of wood for a crutch.
"Oh, you poor little fellow!" cried the rabbit. "You look just like
Billie or Johnny Bushytail after a football game. What has happened?"
"Oh, a boy threw a stone at me, and hurt me!" answered the little
squirrel. "I'm lost and I can't walk home, and I don't know what to
do."
"I'll help you," spoke Uncle Wiggily, kindly, but when he tried to, he
found that his own rheumatism was so bad that he could hardly move.
And the little boy squirrel was so stiff that he could barely walk,
and there they were, both in the woods, with night coming on, and no
way to get home.
"Oh, what shall we do?" cried Uncle Wiggily, and he wished the monkey
would come along. And just then, if you will believe me, there was
another rustling in the bushes, and out galloped Munchie Trot, the
strong pony boy.
"Ha! What is the trouble here?" he asked, switching his tail, just
like a wooden horse on the merry-go-round.
"Oh, we are both so lame that we can't walk," said Uncle Wiggily, "and
we are a long way from the monkey's house. What shall we do?"
"Yes!" cried the little lame squirrel boy, "Boo-hoo! Hoo-boo what
shall we do?"
"Don't say another word!" cried Munchie. "I'll take care of you. Just
get on my back and I'll soon take you to the monkey's house in the
woods." Then the pony boy knelt down so that Uncle Wiggily and the
squirrel could get up on his back.
And when they got there and the cupboard was bare--oh, please excuse
me, that belongs in another story--when they got up on Munchie's back
and were holding tightly to the saddle, off the pony boy started
through the woods, galloping to the monkey's house.
Then a whole lot of mosquitoes swarmed out of the bushes and tried to
bite Uncle Wiggily and the squirrel, but Munchie switched his tail at
the stinging insects, and away they scattered.
Then a big owl flew down out of a tree and tried to grab the squirrel,
but the pony trotted so fast that the owl was left behind. And next a
wolf tried to pull the rabbit off the horse, but Munchie tickled the
savage creature in the ribs with his hoof, and the wolf ran away,
sneezing.
Then the pony came safely to the house that the monkey had built in
the woods, and he and Uncle Wiggily and the squirrel stayed there in
peace and quietness all night, and they put some salve and a bandage
on the squirrel's hurt leg to make it well.
And the next day there was another adventure. I'll tell you what it
was on the next page, when the story will be about Uncle Wiggily and
the green parrot--that is, if the piano key doesn't unlock the front
door and let in a red, white and blue mosquito to bite the baby's
toes.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
STORY XXIV
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE PARROT
Uncle Wiggily was the first one to awaken in the little house that the
monkey had built in the woods. It was the morning after the day when
Munchie Trot had brought the rabbit and the little squirrel boy home
on his back.
"Well, my rheumatism is somewhat better to-day," said the old
gentleman rabbit to himself as he stretched out first one leg and then
the other to see if they hurt him. He didn't have much pain, so he
started to make the fire to boil the coffee.
And some of the wood which he put on the fire was wet so that it
smoked. And the smoke got up the monkey's nose, and made him sneeze,
so that he was awakened, and he helped to get the breakfast in a
hurry.
Then, in turn, Munchie Trot woke up, and next the squirrel boy. His
leg hurt him very much, but Uncle Wiggily and the monkey bound it up
with some splints, and some soft bark, tying it with ribbon grass, and
then they all had breakfast, and felt better.
"But how am I to get home?" asked the little squirrel boy. "My mamma
and papa will worry about me, I know."
"Oh, as to that," said Munchie Trot, switching his long tail to keep
the flies off the breakfast table, "I will take you home on my back."
"Very good," said Uncle Wiggily, "and I will go a little way with you,
and come back here. Perhaps I may find part of my fortune in that
way."
"That's nice," spoke the red monkey, "and I'll stay here and get
dinner. And, say, Uncle Wiggily, if you happen to see a green parrot
just bring him along to whistle for me."
"I will," promised the old gentleman rabbit. Then he helped the little
lame squirrel boy up on the pony's back, and off Munchie started with
Uncle Wiggily hopping alongside. The rabbit looked for his fortune,
but he couldn't find it, and pretty soon he had come as far as he
thought he ought to go, so he said he would start back.
"Good-by," called the lame squirrel boy, "and thank you so much for
being kind to me. Perhaps you may find your fortune on your way back."
"Or, if you don't find that," spoke Munchie, as he waved good-by with
his long tail, "perhaps you will find the green parrot."
Then Uncle Wiggily hopped back toward where he had left the monkey
getting dinner at the little house in the woods. And, just as the old
gentleman rabbit was passing under a butternut tree, he heard a voice
singing this little song:
"Oh, I'm a jolly, jolly sailor lad,
I sail the ocean blue.
And if you're glad, and not very bad,
I'd like to sail with you.
Oh, it's yo-ho-ho when the wind does blow,
And the waves run mountains high.
We will skip along and sing a song
Beneath the bright blue sky.
"Oh, once I lived in a big wire cage,
In a house upon a hill.
For birds like me were the style you see,
Though I sometimes felt quite ill.
I had seeds to eat, in a seed dish neat,
But they didn't agree with me,
So I flew away on a rainy day,
To live in a greenwood tree."
"My, that's rather strange," said Uncle Wiggily. "I don't see how a
sailor lad could live in a cage, nor yet perch in a tree. I must look
into this. Perhaps it may be the beginning of my fortune."
So he crept along very softly, and there, perched on the limb of a
tree, was a nice green parrot, scratching his crooked beak with his
left foot.
"Ha! How do you do? How are the oysters? Have you been in swimming?
Pass the crackers, please. Right this way for your hot ice-cream
cones!" quickly cried the green parrot in a shrill voice.
"Well of all things!" exclaimed the rabbit. "I am pretty well, thank
you, but I don't know anything about oysters, and I haven't been in
swimming. I don't see any crackers to pass, and, as for hot ice-cream
cones, I never heard of them."
"Ha! Ha!" laughed the parrot. "Never mind me. That was only my joking
way. But I'm glad to see you anyhow. I was only fooling about hot
ice-cream cones. Listen and I'll whistle a song for you," and then and
there, without even wiggling his tail once, he whistled a song called:
"Never Drop a Penny Down a Crack in the Boardwalk."
"How do you like that?" asked the parrot as he stood on one leg and
stretched out his wings.
"It was very fine," said the rabbit. "And I believe you are just what
I am looking for. Will you kindly come and whistle for the monkey, so
the bears won't catch him?"
"I certainly will," spoke the parrot, politely. "Show me the way. I am
very fond of monkeys. I used to know one who could play five hand
organs at once--one with his tail."
"This is a red monkey, and he is a friend of the hand organ one," said
Uncle Wiggily, as he hopped on ahead to show the green parrot the way.
Well, pretty soon, not so very long, they came near to the place where
the little house was. They heard a curious hissing noise, like a steam
radiator sissing in cold weather.
"My! What's that? A snake?" asked the parrot, in alarm. Uncle Wiggily
looked through the bushes. Then he laughed.
"It is only the monkey trying to whistle," said the rabbit, "but he
can't do it."
"Poor fellow!" spoke the green parrot kindly. "I'll whistle for him,"
and he did so. At first the monkey was frightened, thinking some real
dogs were coming at the sound of the whistle, but then Uncle Wiggily
and the parrot popped out of the bushes, laughing, and they told the
monkey who they were, the rabbit explaining that the parrot had come
to whistle and scare the bears away.
"It's very kind of you," said the red monkey, "and perhaps in time I
may learn to whistle a little myself. But come now and have dinner."
So the monkey and the parrot and Uncle Wiggily ate their lunch and in
the afternoon they all looked for the old gentleman's fortune, but
they couldn't find it. And that night something very strange happened
as they were all sleeping in the little house which the monkey had
built in the woods.
It was all dark and quiet when, all of a sudden, the fuzzy fox sneaked
up. He broke open the front window, and he was just crawling in
through the hole to eat up the rabbit when the parrot was quickly
awakened by feeling the wind blowing on him through the broken glass.
Then he saw the burglar fox, and he whistled for the make-believe dogs
and cried out:
"Fire! Thieves! Police! Bean-soup! Trolley Cars! Ice-cream cones!
Robbers! Get out of here! Take your tail with you! Police! Mud pies!
Cocoanut pudding! Merry-go-rounds! Look out! Fire! Fish hooks!
Automobiles! Bang-bang! Whoop-de-doodle-do!"
Well, if you'll believe me, that fuzzy fox was never so frightened in
all his life before. He thought a whole lot of soldiers, and guns, and
dogs, and police were after him, and he jumped out of the window and
ran off as fast as his legs would take him. Then Uncle Wiggily and the
green parrot and the red monkey went to sleep again, and there's no
more to this story, as you can see for yourself.
But in case the umbrella doesn't turn outside in, and scare the spoon
holder off the table and make the napkins jump over the sugar bowl,
the next story will be about Uncle Wiggily and the hippity-hop toad.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
STORY XXV
UNCLE WIGGILY AND THE HOPTOAD
"Dear me!" exclaimed Uncle Wiggily as he got out of bed the morning
after the green parrot had scared away the fuzzy fox, "I do seem to be
having the most surprising adventures, but I can't find my fortune.
Anyhow, I'm glad we had the parrot with us last night; aren't you, red
monkey?"
"Indeed I am," declared the little chap with the long tail. "And
perhaps he will bring us good luck, and you may come across your
fortune at any moment. Why don't you go look for it while I take my
whistling lesson?"
"Are you going to try again to whistle?" asked the rabbit.
"Indeed I am," replied the monkey. "I'm not going to give up just
because I can't do a thing the first time or the forty-'leventh time.
If it's possible for me to whistle I'm going to learn."
"Bravo!" cried the parrot, fluttering his green wings. "That's the way
to talk. Well, now we'll have breakfast, and after that I'll give you
a whistling lesson, but first I must sing a song." So he sang this
one:
"Once there was a dollie,
Who could shut her eyes,
They were blue like buttercups,
Under summer skies.
She had hair like roses,
And her teeth were red,
Sometimes when she walked along
She stood on her head.
"Inside her was sawdust,
Fine as fine could be,
Made from sawing little boards
That grew in a tree.
She could walk on tiptoes,
Also skip a rope,
Every Sunday morning she
Washed her face with soap."
"My! That was a funny doll, with red teeth and hair like roses," said
the monkey. "I wonder if she was any relation to me?"
"And who ever heard of blue buttercups?" asked the rabbit. "Buttercups
are yellow! Every one knows that."
"I know," said the parrot. "You see there really wasn't ever any such
dollie--I just made up that song as I went along. But now for
breakfast. Yo, ho! Ho, yo!"
Well, it was a nice breakfast they all had together in the little
house the monkey had built, and when it was over the parrot started on
the whistling lesson. Uncle Wiggily watched the monkey for a time, and
saw the long-tailed chap turn a double back somersault when he found
he couldn't whistle any other way. But even that didn't seem to do any
good.
"Never mind," said the parrot, kindly; "you may learn yet. Never give
up!"