Bitter Waters
Following Vera's suggestion, the next morning the five girls decided
that they would spend the day in making the journey up the famous Mount
Lowe, a few miles away. Afterwards they intended taking one of the long
trail trips over the mountain, so that it would be impossible for them
to return to their hotel until late afternoon.
For many reasons it seemed best that Mrs. Burton should be alone when
she received the visit from Gerry. Surely Gerry would wish to have at
least this first interview without interruption!
Believing it impossible that her guest could arrive before noon, Mrs.
Burton spent the early hours of the morning in writing letters to her
husband and sister, including several business notes as well. She would
not confess it to herself; nevertheless she felt nervous over her first
meeting with Gerry, for although only a few weeks had passed they had
been crowded so tragically close with events in Gerry's life and in her
own. There had been the unexpected tragedy of Billy's death, Billy who
had been so unlike other boys in his life and in his final beautiful
surrender of life.
Therefore when a knock came at her sitting-room door at some time
between half-past ten and eleven, presuming one of the hotel servants
was outside, Mrs. Burton said, "Come in," without raising her eyes from
the paper upon which she was writing.
Afterwards the door opened softly and the next instant some one had
entered the room, but instead of attending to whatever duty had made the
intrusion necessary, the figure stood hesitating just inside the
threshold.
After a little while, becoming vaguely conscious of this fact, Mrs.
Burton glanced up.
"Gerry, you poor child!" she exclaimed with such sudden, warm sympathy
and with such an utter lack of criticism or reproach that any human
being would have been moved to gratitude and remorse.
Gerry stumbled forward. Poor Gerry, who had changed so completely in the
past few weeks that even her delicate prettiness seemed to have vanished
forever! She was so white and worn looking, so thin and unhappy.
"Then you forgive me?" she began.
Mrs. Burton took both her hands.
"We are not going to talk about forgiveness. You had your own life to
live, Gerry, and it was natural that you should do the thing you
supposed to be for your happiness without thinking of your gratitude or
obligation to me. If it had been for your happiness I should not have
expected you to think of me, although it would have been kinder of you.
But of course, dear, when girls do reckless things, the reason older
persons are grieved and angry is because of the consequences they are
sure to bring upon themselves. Being young you cannot understand this!
Yet it seems to me that you are having to pay rather more than other
people. Do sit down, dear; the other girls have gone away for the day so
we shall be entirely alone."
As if she were really too tired to stand, Gerry sank into the nearest
chair.
"I am sorry; I have not been able to sleep since Felipe was arrested. I
am told he keeps asking for me and I am not allowed to see him. He
thinks he has done me a great injustice, but that is not true and
besides I do not care."
Gerry spoke with entire self-forgetfulness.
"Mrs. Burton, I don't think you or perhaps anyone can understand,
although I have tried to make Mr. Morris see. But Felipe and I have been
perfectly miserable ever since we were married. Oh, it is not because we
do not care for each other, because we do care very, very deeply! Only
neither Felipe nor I seemed to realize the weakness and wrong of what we
were doing until we were safely out of our own country and had time to
face the truth. Then Felipe confessed to me he had been a coward. He
seemed to think that no matter what happened in our future together, I
must always think of him as a coward and compare him with other men who
had done their duty. I don't know why he did not think of all this
before. But Felipe has written me that he is almost glad he has been
arrested. Anything which may happen to him will be better than having to
live as a fugitive until the war is over. Besides, even afterwards, he
could never look another American fellow in the face, remembering his
own weakness! Can you understand how anyone could change a point of view
so quickly, Mrs. Burton?" Gerry inquired wistfully. "It is hard even for
me, and yet I realize that Felipe and I simply woke up from our selfish
dream of happiness to realizing we had been traitors and cowards."
"I can understand almost any weakness and almost any strength in human
beings, Gerry dear, after the years I have lived and the men and women I
have known," Mrs. Burton answered, forgetting for the moment Gerry's
youth. But the bitter waters of experience and regret having passed over
Gerry, she was no longer young.
Suddenly Mrs. Burton got up and began walking up and down the room with
the graceful impatience which was ever characteristic of her.
For a moment, watching her, Gerry felt her old charm so deeply that
temporarily she forgot her own sorrow. The peculiar shining quality
which Polly O'Neill had revealed as a girl in times of keen emotion she
had never lost.
"I declare, Gerry, I cannot endure the thought that you and Felipe have
so spoiled your lives at the age when you should have been happiest. If
anything happens, if Felipe is kept in prison for a time, what do you
intend to do?"
Gerry glanced down apparently at her hands which were lightly clasped
together in her lap.
When she looked up at her companion she was smiling, even if somewhat
tremulously.
"I am going to _work_, Mrs. Burton, although it may be difficult for you
to believe after the effort I have made to escape even the thought of
work. But I think at last I have found something which will interest me.
Mr. Morris is very kind; of course he must dislike me under the
circumstances and feel I influenced Felipe, nevertheless he has asked me
to live with him at the ranch indefinitely. But I won't do that, not
after Felipe's trial is over. I shall do some kind of war work and I
don't care now how menial or how humble it is. After a time perhaps I
may learn to be useful. Felipe and I have talked things over and we want
to do whatever is possible to atone for our mistake. If we only had it
all to do over again! But then, of course, I realize what a foolish
thing that is to say!"
"It may be foolish, Gerry, but it is universal."
After this remark Mrs. Burton did not sit down, nor did she speak again
for several moments. Instead she stood, frowning and looking peculiarly
determined and intense.
"Gerry, if Felipe were released from prison, do you think he would be
willing to go into the army and do whatever he could to make himself a
good soldier? I don't believe Felipe is a physical coward, he was merely
a spiritual one. He is rash and impetuous and in a moment of actual
fighting no one would be braver or perhaps more reckless. What he
dreaded was the discipline, the _thought_ of war, the having to
relinquish the ease and beauty and pleasure of his daily life. Well,
there must have been other boys like him, boys who fought with their own
disinclination more gallantly than Felipe! Yet it would be foolish for
the United States to lose a soldier for her army in order to gain a
prisoner. Don't you think Mr. Morris and you also, Gerry, can persuade
Felipe's judges to view the situation in this light? Let him accept
whatever punishment they see fit to bestow, only they must not spoil his
one chance of redeeming his mistake by fighting for his country."
Mrs. Burton might have been pleading with a court instead of addressing
the solitary figure of one unhappy girl. However, she was merely
thinking aloud.
"Mr. Morris is to make that plea for Felipe, although he has very little
hope," Gerry answered. "Felipe would be willing to give even his life
now to blot out the past."
Mrs. Burton walked over and placed her hands on Gerry's shoulders.
"My dear," she said, "I am going to stay here in California with you
for a time at least and see what I can do to help. I may not have much
influence, but I shall do my best. The girls can go home alone; they do
not require me to chaperon them. I have no doubt they will have more
pleasure in traveling without me. Besides, it seems to me that no one at
present has the same need for me that you have, Gerry!"
Slowly in these past few weeks Gerry's soul had been coming to the
light. The revelation of it now shone through her eyes, yet she made no
effort to express her thanks in words.
"When the time arrives and Felipe _is_ allowed to go to France to fight,
perhaps I shall have learned to be useful. Do you think they will ever
allow American girls to work behind the lines?"
Mrs. Burton shook her head.
"I don't know. Yet the call of France rings in all our ears and all our
hearts today, Gerry. We can only answer the call when our opportunity
arises."
* * * * *
The next volume in the Camp Fire series will deal with the work of the
Camp Fire girls in France. They will establish Camp Fires among the
young French girls. The old care-free days having passed away, they will
also devote their energies to aiding the children of France and to doing
"their bit" toward the restoration of that land of our affection,
France, where, in the future as in the past, Beauty and Liberty must
walk hand in hand. The title will be "The Camp Fire Girls on the Field
of Honor."
STORIES ABOUT CAMP FIRE GIRLS
The Camp Fire Girls at Sunrise Hill
The Camp Fire Girls Amid the Snows
The Camp Fire Girls in the Outside World
The Camp Fire Girls Across the Sea
The Camp Fire Girls' Careers
The Camp Fire Girls in After Years
The Camp Fire Girls at the Edge of the Desert
The Camp Fire Girls at the End of the Trail
The Camp Fire Girls Behind the Lines
The Camp Fire Girls on the Field of Honor