The red-gold of the sun still warmed the late summer dusk. The fading
light sifted between the curtains of the window and touched lovingly
the checkered coverlid, moulding into soft outline the rounded little
limbs beneath. The long hair spread goldenly across the pillow, and the
wide brown eyes were open.
Old Anne was going to die--old Anne with the ugly wrinkled face and
bony fingers from which all the children ran. She was going to die that
night. Margaret had heard it whispered among the servants. That very
same night while she herself was asleep in bed! Her soul was going to
leave her body and fly up to God.
She wondered how it would look, but she knew it would be very
beautiful. Its back would not be bent, nor its face drawn with
shining burn-scars. It would be young and straight, and it would
have wings--long, white wings, such as the angels had in the big
stained-glass window over the choir-box in the chapel. It would
have a ring of light around its head, such as the moon had on misty
evenings. It would go just at the moment when old Anne died, and those
who watched close enough might see. Would it speak? Or would it go so
swiftly that it could only smile for a good-by? She wondered if its
eyes would be kindly and blue, not dim and watery as Anne’s had been.
Her own face was smoother and prettier than Anne’s, but her eyes were
dark. Angels always had blue eyes. Its face would be turned up toward
heaven, where it was going, and its wings would make a soft, whispering
sound, like a pigeon’s when it starts to fly. One would have to be very
quick, but if one were there at just the right minute, one could see it.
Oh, if _she_ only could! She felt quite sure she would not be afraid
of Anne then, knowing that she was just going to be an angel! If they
would only let her! She was so little, and they would be watching, so
that maybe they would not notice her. Perhaps she could slip in quietly
on tiptoe, and then she would see a real shining soul, such as she
herself had inside of her, and which she loved to imagine sometimes
looked out of her eyes at her from the looking-glass. A breathless
eagerness seized her, and she sat up in the bed, hugging her knees and
resting her chin upon them.
She listened a moment; the house was very still. Then she threw down
the covers, and jumped in her bare feet to the floor. She sat down
on the rug in her white nightgown, and pulled on her stockings with
nervous haste, and her shoes, leaving them unbuttoned and flapping.
Then she slipped into her muslin dress, fastening it behind at the neck
and waist, and opened the door, tugging at the big brass knob, and
quaking at its complaining creaks. No one was in sight, and the little
figure, with its bright floating hair and rosy skin showing between
its shoulders like a belated locust, stole fearfully down the dim
stairway, along the deserted hall, and sidling through the half-opened
door, stepped out among the long-fingered glooms of the standing
shrubbery.
She hesitated a moment, frightened at the outdoor dark, and then,
catching her breath, ran quickly around the corner of the house,
and down the drive toward the low, clapboarded structure beside the
stables, where a lighted window-shade with moving shadows pointed out
the room of that solemn presence.
The night air was warm and heavy, and its door stood wide. She crept up
close and listened. Between low-muttered words of subdued conversation,
she heard a slow and labored breathing--a breathing now stopping,
now beginning again, and with a curious rattle in it which somehow
awed her. From where she crouched, she could see only the foot of the
bed, with its tall, bare posts. There seemed to be expectancy in the
hushed voices within, and a quick fear seized her lest she should miss
the wonderful sight. Quivering with eagerness, she rose to her feet,
and with her fascinated gaze seeking out the old face on the pillow,
stepped straight forward into the room.
She heard a rising murmur of astonishment, of protest, and before her
light-blinded eyes had found their way, felt herself seized roughly,
unceremoniously, lifted bodily off her feet and borne out into the
night. She heard, through the passionate resentment of her childish
mind, the soothing endearments of Jem the gardener, and she struggled
to loose herself, beating at his face with her hands and sobbing with
helpless suffocation of anger.
A frightened maid met them at the door and took her from him, carrying
her to her room to undress her and sit by her till she should fall
asleep. No assurance that old Anne would soon be happy in heaven
comforted her. No one understood, and she was too hurt to explain what
she had wanted.
So she lay through the long hours, the bitter tears of grief and
disappointment wetting her pillow.