Interior of hut. The Labourer alone, his horns and hoofs showing.
LABOURER. There's lots of corn. More than there's room for, and he's now
got a taste for it. We've been distilling again, and we've filled a
barrel and hidden it away. We're not going to treat any one for nothing,
but when we want to get something out of a fellow, then we'll treat him!
So to-day I told him to invite the village elders and treat them, that
they should divide up the property between him and his grandfather, and
give everything to him and nothing to the old man! My three years are up
to-day, and my work is finished. Let the Chief come and see for himself.
I needn't be ashamed of his seeing it!
Chief appears out of the ground.
CHIEF. Time's up! Have you redeemed your bread-blunder? I told you I'd
come and see for myself. Have you managed the Peasant?
LABOURER. Done him completely! Judge for yourself. Some of them will
meet here soon. Get into the oven, and see what they'll do. You'll be
well satisfied!
CHIEF [climbs into the oven] We'll see!
Enter the Peasant and four old men. The Wife follows. The men sit
down round the table. The Wife lays the cloth, sets ox-foot brawn
and pies on the table. The old men exchange greetings with Labourer.
FIRST ELDER. Well, have you made more of the drink?
LABOURER. Yes, we've distilled as much as we need. Why let valuable
stuff be wasted?
SECOND ELDER. And is it a success?
LABOURER. Better than the first lot.
SECOND ELDER. But where did you learn to make it?
LABOURER. Going about in the world one learns many things!
THIRD ELDER. Yes, yes, you're a knowing fellow.
Wife brings spirits and glasses.
PEASANT. Have a drop!
Wife takes a decanter and fills glasses.
WIFE. Do us the honour!
FIRST ELDER [drinks] Your health! Ah, that's good. It runs right through
all one's joints. That's what I call proper drink!
The other three Elders do the same. Chief gets out of the oven.
Labourer goes and stands by him.
LABOURER [to Chief] See what will happen now! I'll trip up the woman
with my foot and she'll spill the liquor. Formerly he did not grudge his
last crust, but now see what he'll do about a glass of spirits!
PEASANT. Now then, wife, fill again and hand it round in due
order--first to our friend here, then to Daddy Michael.
Wife fills a glass and goes round the table. The Labourer trips her
up; she stumbles and upsets the glass.
WIFE. Gracious goodness, I've spilt it! Why do you get in my way,
confound you?
PEASANT [to Wife] There now, what a clumsy beast! Her fingers are all
thumbs, and she goes swearing at others! See what fine stuff she goes
spilling on the ground!
WIFE. I didn't do it on purpose.
PEASANT. On purpose indeed! Wait till I get up; I'll teach you how to
pour spirits on the ground. [To Labourer] And you too, you confounded
fool, what are you prancing round the table for? Go to the Devil!
Wife again fills and hands the glasses round.
LABOURER [goes back to the oven to the Chief] You see? Formerly he did
not grudge his last crust, and now for a glass of spirits he nearly beat
his wife and sent me to you--to the Devil!
CHIEF. It's good, very good! I'm satisfied.
LABOURER. You wait a bit. Let them empty the bottle--and you'll see what
will happen. Even now they are giving each other smooth oily words;
presently they'll start flattering each other,--as cunning as foxes.
PEASANT. Well, old friends, what's your opinion of my business? My
grandfather has been living with me, and I have been feeding him and
feeding him, and now he's gone to live with my uncle, and wants to take
his share of the property and give it to uncle! Consider it well; you
are wise men. We could as well do without our own heads as without you.
There's no one in the whole village to come near you. Take you for
example, Iván Fedótitch--doesn't every one say you're first among men?
And as for me, I'll tell you the truth, Iván Fedótitch, I'm fonder of
you than of my own father or mother. As for Michael Stepánitch, he's an
old friend.
FIRST ELDER [to Peasant] It's good to talk with a good man. It's the way
to get wisdom. It's just the same with you. One can't find any one to
compare with you either.
SECOND ELDER. Wise and affectionate--that's what I like you for.
THIRD ELDER. You have my best sympathy. I can't find words to express
it. I was saying to my old woman only to-day ...
FOURTH ELDER. A friend, a real friend!
LABOURER [nudges the Chief] Do you hear? All lies! They abuse one
another behind their backs, but see how thick they are laying it on
now,--like foxes wagging their tails! And it all comes from that drink.
CHIEF. That drink is good, very good! If they take to lying like that,
they'll all be ours. Very good; I'm satisfied!
LABOURER. Wait a bit. When they've finished a second bottle it will be
better still!
WIFE [serves] Do have another glass.
FIRST ELDER. Won't it be too much? Your health! [Drinks] It's pleasant
to drink in the company of a good man.
SECOND ELDER. How can one help drinking? Health to the host and hostess!
THIRD ELDER. Friends, your health!
FOURTH ELDER. This is a brew of the right sort! Let's be merry! We'll
arrange things for you. 'Cos it all depends on me!
FIRST ELDER. On you? No, not on you, but on what your seniors say.
FOURTH ELDER. My seniors are greater fools. Go where you came from!
SECOND ELDER. What are you up to now? You fool!
THIRD ELDER. It's true what he's saying! 'Cos why? The host is not
entertaining us for nothing. He means business. The business can be
arranged. Only you must stand treat! Show us due respect. 'Cos it's you
as wants me, and not I you! You're own brother to the pig!
PEASANT. And you're itself! What are you yelling for? Think to surprise
me? You are all good at stuffing yourselves!
FIRST ELDER. What are you giving yourself airs for? See if I don't twist
your nose to one side!
PEASANT. We'll see whose nose will get twisted!
SECOND ELDER. Think yourself such a marvel? Go to the Devil! I won't
speak to you--I'll go away!
PEASANT [holds him] What, will you break up the company?
SECOND ELDER. Let me go, or I'll call for help!
PEASANT. I won't! What right have you to ...?
SECOND ELDER. This right! [Beats him].
PEASANT [to the other Elders] Help me!
They fall on one another, and all speak at once.
FIRST ELDER. That's why. 'Cos it means we're all having a spree-ee!
SECOND ELDER. I can arrange everything!
THIRD ELDER. Let's have some more!
PEASANT [to Wife] Bring another bottle!
All sit round the table again and drink.
LABOURER [to Chief] Have you noticed? The wolf's blood in them was
aroused, and they've turned as fierce as wolves.
CHIEF. The drink is good! I'm satisfied!
LABOURER. Wait a bit. Let them empty a third bottle. Things will be
better still!
Curtain.