[Illustration: 'S']
Well, sir, we're tryin' to edjercate him--good ez we can. Th' ain't
never been a edjercational advantage come in reach of us but we've give
it to him. Of co'se he's all we've got, that one boy is, an' wife an'
me, why, we feel the same way about it.
They's three schools in the county, not countin' the niggers', an' we
send him to all three.
Sir? Oh, yas, sir; he b'longs to all three schools--to fo' for that
matter, countin' the home school.
You see, Sonny he's purty ticklish to handle, an' a person has to know
thess how to tackle him. Even wife an' me, thet's been knowin' him
f'om the beginnin', not only knowin' his traits, but how he come by
'em,--though some is hard to trace to their so'ces,--why, sir, even
we have to study sometimes to keep in with him, an' of co'se a
teacher--why, it's thess hit an' miss whether he'll take the right tack
with him or not; an' sometimes one teacher'll strike it one day, an'
another nex' day; so by payin' schoolin' for him right along in all
three, why, of co'se, ef he don't feel like goin' to one, why, he'll
go to another.
Once-t in a while he'll git out with the whole of 'em, an' that was
how wife come to open the home school for him. She was determined his
edjercation shouldn't be interrupted ef she could help it. She don't
encour'ge him much to go to her school, though, 'cause it interrupts her
in her housekeepin' consider'ble, an' she's had extry quilt-patchin' on
hand ever since he come. She's patchin' him a set 'ginst the time he'll
marry.
'An' then I reckon he frets her a good deal in school. Somehow, seems
like he thess picks up enough in the other schools to be able to
conterdic' her ways o' teachin'.
F' instance, in addin' up a colume o' figgers, ef she comes to a
aught--which some calls 'em naughts--she'll say, "Aught's a aught," an'
Sonny ain't been learned to say it that a-way; an' so maybe when she
says, "Aught's a aught," he'll say, "Who said it wasn't!" an' that puts
her out in countin'.
He's been learned to thess pass over aughts an' not call their names;
and once-t or twice-t, when wife called 'em out that a-way, why, he got
so fretted he thess gethered up his things an' went to another school.
But seem like she's added aughts that a-way so long she can't think to
add 'em no other way.
I notice nights after she's kept school for Sonny all day she talks
consider'ble in her sleep, an' she says, "Aught's a aught" about ez
often ez she says anything else.
Oh, yas, sir; he's had consider'ble fusses with his teachers, one way
an' another, but they ever'one declare they think a heap of 'im.
Sir? Oh, yas, sir; of co'se they all draw their reg'lar pay whether he's
a day in school du'in' the month or not. That's right enough, 'cause you
see they don't know what day he's li'ble to drop in on 'em, an' it's
worth the money thess a-keepin' their nerves strung for 'im.
Well, yas, sir; 't is toler'ble expensive, lookin' at it one way,
but lookin' at it another, it don't cost no mo' 'n what it would to
edjercate three child'en, which many poor families have to do--_an'
more_--which in our united mind Sonny's worth 'em all.
Yas, sir; 't is confusin' to him in some ways, goin' to all three
schools at once-t.
F' instance, Miss Alviry Sawyer, which she's a single-handed maiden lady
'bout wife's age, why, of co'se, she teaches accordin' to the old rules;
an' in learnin' the child'en subtraction, f' instance, she'll tell 'em,
ef they run short to borry one f'om the nex' lef' han' top figur', an'
pay it back to the feller underneath him.
Well, this didn't suit Sonny's sense o' jestice no way, borryin' from
one an' payin' back to somebody else; so he thess up an argued about
it--told her thet fellers thet borried nickels f'om one another couldn't
pay back that a-way; an' of co'se she told him they was heap o'
difference 'twix' money and 'rithmetic--which I wish't they was more in
my experience; an' so they had it hot and heavy for a while, till at
last she explained to him thet that way of doin' subtraction _fetched
the answer_, which, of co'se, ought to satisfy any school-boy; an' I
reckon Sonny would soon 'a' settled into that way 'ceptin' thet he got
out o' patience with that school in sev'al ways, an' he left an' went
out to Sandy Crik school, and it thess happened that he struck a
subtraction class there the day he got in, an' they was workin' it the
_other_ way--borry one from the top figur' an' never pay it back at all,
thess count it off (that's the way I 've worked my lifelong subtraction,
though wife does hers payin' back), an' of co'se Sonny was ready to
dispute this way, an' he didn't have no mo' tac' than to th'ow up Miss
Alviry's way to the teacher, which of co'se he wouldn't stand,
particular ez Miss Alviry's got the biggest school. So they broke up in
a row, immejate, and Sonny went right along to Miss Kellogg's school
down here at the cross-roads.
She's a sort o' reformed teacher, I take it; an' she gets at her
subtraction by a new route altogether--like ez ef the first feller thet
had any surplus went sort o security for them thet was short, an' passed
the loan down the line. But I noticed he never got his money back, for
when they come to him, why, they docked him. I reckon goin' security is
purty much the same in an out o' books. She passes the borryin' along
some way till it gits to headquarters, an' writes a new row o' figur's
over the heads o' the others. Well, my old brain got so addled watchin'
Sonny work it thet I didn't seem to know one figur' f'om another 'fo' he
got thoo; but when I see the answer come, why, I was satisfied. Ef a man
can thess git his answers right all his life, why nobody ain't a-goin'
to pester him about how he worked his figur's.
I did try to get Sonny to stick to one school for each rule in
'rithmetic, an' havin' thess fo' schools, why he could learn each o' the
fo' rules by one settled plan. But he wont promise nothin'. He'll quit
for lessons one week, and maybe next week somethin' else 'll decide him.
(He's quit ever' one of 'em in turn when they come to long division.)
He went thoo a whole week o' disagreeable lessons once-t at one school
'cause he was watchin' a bird-nest on the way to that school. He was
determined them young birds was to be allowed to leave that nest without
bein' pestered, an' they stayed so long they purty nigh run him into
long division 'fo' they did fly. Ef he'd 'a' missed school one day he
knowed two sneaky chaps thet would 'a' robbed that nest, either goin'
or comin'.
Of co'se Sonny goes to the exhibitions an' picnics of all the schools.
Last summer we had a time of it when it come picnic season. Two schools
set the same day for theirs, which of co'se wasn't no ways fair to
Sonny. He payin' right along in all the schools, of co'se he was
entitled to all the picnics; so I put on my Sunday clo'es, an' I went
down an' had it fixed right. They all wanted Sonny, too, come down to
the truth, 'cause besides bein' fond of him, they knowed thet Sonny
always fetched a big basket.
[Illustration: "He was watchin' a bird-nest on the way to that school."]
Trouble with Sonny is thet he don't take nothin' on nobody's say-so,
don't keer who it is. He even commenced to dispute Moses one Sunday when
wife was readin' the Holy Scriptures to him, tell of co'se she made him
understand thet that wouldn't do. Moses didn't intend to _be_
conterdicted.
An' ez to secular lessons, he ain't got no espec' for 'em whatsoever.
F' instance, when the teacher learned him thet the world was round, why
he up an' told him _'t warn't so_, less'n we was on the inside an' it
was blue-lined, which of co'se teacher he insisted thet we was _on the
outside_, walkin' over it, all feet todes the center--a thing I've
always thought myself was mo' easy said than proved.
Well, sir, Sonny didn't hesitate to deny it, an' of co'se teacher he
commenced by givin' him a check--which is a bad mark--for conterdictin'.
An' then Sonny he 'lowed thet he didn't conterdic' to _be_
aconterdictin', but he _knowed't_ warn't so. He had walked the whole
len'th o' the road 'twix' the farm an' the school-house, an' they warn't
_no bulge in it_; an' besides, he hadn't never saw over the edges of it.
An' with that teacher he give him another check for speakin' out o'
turn. An' then Sonny, says he, "Ef a man was tall enough he could see
around the edges, couldn't he?" "No," says the teacher; "a man couldn't
grow that tall," says he; "he'd be deformed."
An' Sonny, why, he spoke up again, an' says he, "But I'm thess a-sayin'
_ef_," says he. "An' teacher," says he, "we ain't a-studyin' _efs_;
we're studyin' geoger'phy." And then Sonny they say he kep' still a
minute, an' then he says, says he, "Oh, maybe he couldn't see over the
edges, teacher, 'cause ef he was tall enough his head might reach up
into the flo' o' heaven." And with that teacher he give him another
check, an' told him not to dare to mix up geoger'phy an' religion, which
was a sackerlege to both studies; an' with that Sonny gethered up his
books an' set out to another school.
I think myself it 'u'd be thess ez well ef Sonny wasn't quite so quick
to conterdic'; but it's thess his way of holdin' his p'int.
Why, one day he faced one o' the teachers down thet two an' two didn't
_haf_ to make _fo_', wh'er or no.
This seemed to tickle the teacher mightily, an' so he laughed an' told
him he was goin' to give him rope enough to hang hisself now, an' then
he dared him to show him any two an' two thet didn't make fo', and Sonny
says, says he, "Heap o' two an' twos don't make four, 'cause they're
kep' sep'rate," says he.
"An' then," says he, "I don't want my two billy-goats harnessed up with
nobody else's two billys to make fo' billys."
"But," says the teacher, "suppose I _was_ to harness up yo' two goats
with Tom Deems's two, there'd be fo' goats, I reckon, whether you wanted
'em there or not."
"No they wouldn't," says Sonny. "They wouldn't be but two. 'T wouldn't
take my team more 'n half a minute to butt the life out o' Tom's team."
An' with that little Tommy Deems, why, he commenced to cry, an' 'stid o'
punishin' him for bein' sech a cry-baby, what did the teacher do but
give Sonny another check, for castin' slurs on Tommy's animals, an'
gettin' Tommy's feelin's hurted! Which I ain't a-sayin' it on account o'
Sonny bein' my boy, but it seems to me was a mighty unfair advantage.
No boy's feelin's ain't got no right to be that tender--an' a goat is
the last thing on earth thet could be injured by a word of mouth.
Sonny's pets an' beasts has made a heap o' commotion in school one way
an' another, somehow. Ef 't ain't his goats it's somethin' else.
Sir! Sonny's pets? Oh, they're all sorts. He ain't no ways partic'lar
thess so a thing is po' an' miser'ble enough. That's about all he seems
to require of anything.
He don't never go to school hardly 'thout a garter-snake or two or a
lizard or a toad-frog somewheres about him. He's got some o' the little
girls at school that nervous thet if he thess shakes his little sleeve
at 'em they'll squeal, not knowin' what sort o' live critter'll jump out
of it.
Most of his pets is things he's got by their bein' hurted some way.
One of his toad-frogs is blind of a eye. Sonny rescued him from the old
red rooster one day after he had nearly pecked him to death, an' he had
him hoppin' round the kitchen for about a week with one eye bandaged up.
When a hurted critter gits good an' strong he gen'ally turns it loose
ag'in; but ef it stays puny, why he reg'lar 'dopts it an' names it
Jones. That's thess a little notion o' his, namin' his pets the family
name.
The most outlandish thing he ever 'dopted, to my mind, is that old
yaller cat. That was a miser'ble low-down stray cat thet hung round the
place a whole season, an' Sonny used to vow he was goin' to kill it,
'cause it kep' a-ketchin' the birds.
Well, one day he happened to see him thess runnin' off with a young
mockin'-bird in his mouth, an' he took a brickbat an' he let him have
it, an' of co'se he dropped the bird an' tumbled over--stunted. The bird
it got well, and Sonny turned him loose after a few days; but that cat
was hurted fatal. He couldn't never no mo' 'n drag hisself around from
that day to this; an' I reckon ef Sonny was called on to give up every
pet he's got, that cat would be 'bout the last thing he'd surrender. He
named him Tommy Jones, an' he never goes to school of a mornin', rain or
shine, till Tommy Jones is fed f'om his own plate with somethin' he's
left for him special.
Of co'se Sonny he's got his faults, which anybody 'll tell you; but th'
ain't a dumb brute on the farm but'll foller him around--an' the nigger
Dicey, why, she thinks they never was such another boy born into the
world--that is, not no human child.