I am just returned from my morning walk, and already have received a
letter from Mr. Lovelace in answer to mine deposited last night. He
must have had pen, ink, and paper with him; for it was written in the
coppice; with this circumstance: On one knee, kneeling with the other.
Not from reverence to the written to, however, as you'll find!
Well we are instructed early to keep these men at distance. An
undesigning open heart, where it is loth to disoblige, is easily drawn
in, I see, to oblige more than ever it designed. It is too apt to govern
itself by what a bold spirit is encouraged to expect of it. It is very
difficult for a good-natured young person to give a negative where it
disesteems not.
Our hearts may harden and contract, as we gain experience, and when we
have smarted perhaps for our easy folly: and so they ought, or we should
be upon very unequal terms with the world.
Excuse these grave reflections. This man has vexed me heartily. I see
his gentleness was art: fierceness, and a temper like what I have been
too much used to at home, are Nature in him. Nothing, I think, shall
ever make me forgive him; for, surely, there can be no good reason for
his impatience on an expectation given with reserve, and revocable.--I
so much to suffer through him; yet, to be treated as if I were obliged
to bear insults from him--!
But here you will be pleased to read his letter; which I shall enclose.