As soon as I had transcribed it, I sent it down to my brother by Mrs.
Betty.
The wench came up soon after, all aghast, with a Laud, Miss! What have
you done?--What have you written? For you have set them all in a joyful
uproar!
*****
My sister is but this moment gone from me. She came up all in a flame;
which obliged me abruptly to lay down my pen: she ran to me--
O Spirit! said she; tapping my neck a little too hard. And is it come to
this at last--!
Do you beat me, Bella?
Do you call this beating you? only tapping you shoulder thus, said
she; tapping again more gently--This is what we expected it would come
to--You want to be independent--My father has lived too long for you--!
I was going to speak with vehemence; but she put her handkerchief
before my mouth, very rudely--You have done enough with your pen, mean
listener, as you are!--But know that neither your independent scheme,
nor any of your visiting ones, will be granted you. Take your course,
perverse one! Call in your rake to help you to an independence upon
your parents, and a dependence upon him!--Do so!--Prepare this
moment--resolve what you will take with you--to-morrow you go--depend
upon it to-morrow you go!--No longer shall you stay here, watching
and creeping about to hearken to what people say--'Tis determined,
child!--You go to-morrow--my brother would have come up to tell you so;
but I persuaded him to the contrary--for I know not what had become
of you, if he had--Such a letter! such an insolent, such a
conceited challenger!--O thou vain creature! But prepare yourself, I
say--to-morrow you go--my brother will accept of your bold challenge;
but it must be personal; and at my uncle Antony's--or perhaps at Mr.
Solmes's--
Thus she ran on, almost foaming with passion; till, quite out of
patience, I said, No more of your violence, Bella--Had I known in what
way you designed to come up, you should not have found my chamber-door
open--talk to your servant in this manner. Unlike you, as I bless God I
am, I am nevertheless your sister--and let me tell you, that I won't go
to-morrow, nor next day, nor next day to that--except I am dragged away
by violence.
What! not if your father or mother command it--Girl? said she, intending
another word, by her pause and manner before it came out.
Let it come to that, Bella; then I shall know what to say. But it shall
be from their own mouths, if I do--not from yours, nor you Betty's--And
say another word to me, in this manner, and be the consequence what it
may, I will force myself into their presence; and demand what I have
done to be used thus!
Come along, Child! Come along, Meekness--taking my hand, and leading me
towards the door--Demand it of them now--you'll find both your despised
parents together!--What! does your heart fail you?--for I resisted,
being thus insolently offered to be led, and pulled my hand from her.
I want not to be led, said I; and since I can plead your invitation, I
will go: and was posting to the stairs accordingly in my passion--but
she got between me and the door, and shut it--
Let me first, Bold one, said she, apprize them of your visit--for your
own sake let me--for my brother is with them. But yet opening it again,
seeing me shrink back--Go, if you will!--Why don't you go?--Why don't
you go, Miss?--following me to my closet, whither I retired, with my
heart full, and pulled the sash-door after me; and could no longer hold
in my tears.
Nor would I answer one word to her repeated aggravations, nor to her
demands upon me to open my door (for the key was on the inside); nor so
much as turn my head towards her, as she looked through the glass at me.
And at last, which vexed her to the heart, I drew the silk curtain, that
she should not see me, and down she went muttering all the way.
Is not this usage enough to provoke a rashness never before thought of?
As it is but too probable that I may be hurried away to my uncle's
without being able to give you previous notice of it; I beg that as soon
as you shall hear of such a violence, you would send to the usual place,
to take back such of your letters as may not have reached my hands, or
to fetch any of mine that may be there.
May you, my dear, be always happy, prays you CLARISSA HARLOWE.
I have received your four letters. But am in such a ferment, that I
cannot at present write to them.