THERE was once a Fowler who caught a young Parrot. He kept the Parrot in
his house, hoping that it would pick up something to say, but the Parrot
learnt nothing at all. Then he set to work at teaching it; but after six
months the Parrot had only learnt to say two things: one was "Of
course," and the other was "Certainly."
Seeing that his trouble was wasted, the Fowler took him to market in a
gilt cage, in order to catch the eye of customers. He cried in a loud
voice, "Who'll buy! who'll buy! here's a Parrot which can say anything
in the world! Here's a clever Parrot who knows what he is talking about!
If you want a question answered here's the Parrot to answer you, no
matter what it may be! Who'll buy, who'll buy?" Everybody crowded round
to see the wonderful Parrot.
The King happened to be passing by, and heard all this to-do about a
Parrot. Said he to the Fowler--
"Is it really true about your Parrot?"
"Ask him, sire," said the Fowler.
"Parrot," said the King, "do you know English?"
"Of course," said the Parrot, in a tone of scorn, turning up his beak;
as who should say, "What a question to ask _me_."
"Can you decide knotty points of law?" the King went on.
"Certainly," said the Parrot, with great confidence.
"This is the bird for me," said the King, and asked his price. The price
was a thousand pounds. The King paid a thousand pounds to the Fowler,
and departed.
A big price, you will say, for a Parrot. So it was; but the King had a
reason for paying it. The Judge of the City had just died, and the King
could not find another. Hundreds of men offered to do the work. Some
wanted too much money, more than the King could pay; some were
reasonable, but knew no law; and the cheaper ones who professed to know
everything were all Germans, whom the King would not have at any price.
When he heard of this wise Parrot, thought he, "Here's my Judge; he will
want no wages but sugar and chickweed, and he will take no bribes."
So the Parrot was made Judge, and sat on a big throne, with a white wig
and a red robe lined with ermine.
Next day, the Parrot was in Court, and a case came up for judgment. It
was a murder case, and when the evidence had been heard, the pleader on
the murderer's side finished up his speech by saying, "And now, my Lord,
you must admit that my client is innocent."