Jenny:
Where the devil is Olivia? Where is Worthy? Worthy hasn't returned
yet. What is all this? On my oath, I am going crazy? I take this
business to heart worse than if it were my own.
(Enter Worthy)
Jenny:
Eh! Where are you coming from?
Worthy:
I've been to Arabella and then Selina.
Jenny:
To do what?
Worthy:
To bring them to witness the comedy. Didn't you tell me it was
necessary for them to be present to prevent Laura from relapsing?
Jenny:
Yes, but it's more important to know if the comedy is going to go on.
Worthy:
Since Slice hasn't returned, all is going well. He's thought of
everything without a doubt.
Jenny: (derisively)
Oh, there, there, everything's going fine. Nothing could spoil it.
Worthy:
What's Laura doing?
Jenny:
Oh, my word. She's quite resolved never to see Cadwell again if he
falls into the trap.
(Enter Slice)
Slice:
Sir?
Worthy:
Ah, you here? Well?
Jenny:
What have you done?
Slice:
He's undoing himself. He's sure he knows the imaginary person I told
him of. I didn't want to undeceive him since he's so sure of it.
Jenny:
He's going to let you blindfold him?
Slice:
Everything, I tell you.
Jenny:
Ah, the funny dodo. His name will become famous.
Slice:
He will meet me in the Park in a few minutes.
Worthy:
It isn't far. Better for you to wait for him. Hurry! Have you a
carriage?
Slice:
I've everything that's necessary.
Jenny:
If by chance he tries to tear off his blindfold?
Slice:
Don't worry about anything. Two of us will prevent him.
Jenny:
Get going, then.
(Exit Slice, then enter Laura and Olivia)
Laura: (to Jenny)
Well--is he coming then?
Jenny:
Yes, madam.
Laura:
On the conditions imposed on him?
Jenny:
Yes, madam.
Laura:
I have trouble believing it.
Worthy:
It's your tenderness speaking for him again, madam.
Laura:
Don't speak of tenderness anymore, Worthy. But permit me to doubt what
I haven't seen.
Worthy:
Do you really need this additional proof, after all that has passed?
Laura:
My God, Worthy, I am not taking his side. But still all that's
happened doesn't absolutely prove he's guilty.
Olivia:
My brother always persists at the wrong time.
Laura:
Not at all, madam, and we cannot both be right.
Jenny:
The silly goose will not give up his intrigues.
Laura:
Shut up, Jenny. These jokes don't please me, understand?
(Enter Arabella and Selina)
Laura:
Ah, ladies, I am delighted to see you here. You couldn't come at a
better time.
Arabella: (to Laura)
Why, madam?
Selina:
Eh? How's that madam?
Jenny:
We are going to trap a goose. Don't say anything.
Laura: (to Arabella)
And above all, you, madam.
Arabella:
If it's something regarding Cadwell, as Worthy told me, (pointing to
Selina) this lady can take a greater part than I.
Olivia:
Selina is also a rival of Laura's?
Selina:
Me? I don't know what they're talking about?
Jenny:
Come, come, madam, admit the debt. There's no one here Cadwell has not
deceived.
Worthy:
Truly, it merits a public punishment.
Laura:
You don't take it badly, sir. But if things don't work out as you plan
won't his glory be greater?
Selina:
I don't know what to say about it at all.
Olivia: (pulling Selina into a corner)
I am going to instruct you, madam.
Laura:
But, madam, if Cadwell doesn't come what good is it?
Jenny:
Well! What a misfortune! Madam, is not an interested party?
Arabella: (going to Selina and Olivia) I intend to know all about
this, too. They've told me quite imperfectly.
(The three talk)
Laura: (to Worthy)
Worthy, the hour's passing. Cadwell, isn't coming. I admit to you that
I won't be angry if he makes fun of you.
Worthy:
At least I will have the consolation of knowing he deserves the
tenderness you have for him, madam. But I don't see anything to make
you hopeful. It is not yet time.
(Olivia, Arabella, and Selina join Worthy and Laura)
Arabella: (to Olivia)
Really, this is very pleasant.
Olivia:
Will he be stupid enough to chance it?
Jenny:
Oh, indeed yes.
Laura:
I doubt it, Jenny. A man with the character you ascribe to him would
be more careful.
Jenny:
Unless another woman holds him off, I cannot conceive what would
restrain him.
Laura:
Worthy, he's not coming. (to Olivia) Madam, he's not coming. (To
Selina) Madam, do you believe he will come?
Selina:
I truly don't know, madam.
Jenny:
At the beginning, didn't he keep every rendez-vous you gave him?
Selina:
Oh, shut up, Jenny. I am angry with myself.
Olivia: (hearing someone enter)
I hear a noise.
(Enter Slice)
Slice:
Snuff the lights.
(Jenny snuffs the lights)
Laura: (aside)
I am lost.
Slice:
My men are keeping him in the antechamber. Shall he be brought in?
Laura:
Yes, let him come in. I intend to see him. Who will speak to him? I
admit I lack the strength to do it myself.
Worthy:
Is there need to speak to him? Aren't you satisfied madam? Besides, he
knows your voice.
Jenny:
Doesn't he know the voices of all the ladies here? By heart, by all
the devils! This is the worst of it. Wait--I can change my voice. Let
him enter. Do you wish it, madam?
Laura:
Do what you wish.
(Slice brings in Bendish dressed like his master, blindfolded)
Slice: (to Bendish)
We are entered into her apartment. You have only to wait to be happy.
Bendish:
I've been here before, my boy. I assure you that it is only out of
consideration for you, and because I don't wish you to lose your
promised reward, that I am not at this very moment calming two
irritated mistresses.
Slice:
I am much obliged to you. Remember, that the least effort you make to
see madam may cost you your life.
Bendish:
Oh, I am not worried. Come, come, my friend, I am accustomed to these
types of adventures, and we have brought off more perilous ones than
this.
Slice:
You are at present in her boudoir, and I leave you alone with her.
Jenny: (low to all but Slice and Bendish)
Silence, don't make the least noise.
Bendish: (aside)
Watch out for trouble!
Jenny: (aside)
Nice beginning.
Bendish:
Well, angel, here I am.
Laura: (aside)
The traitor!
Jenny:
Keep such sweet talk for when you know me better. Listen before
responding to the things I have to say to you.
Bendish:
Plague! You take me for a great fool! I intend to prove to you I merit
the choice your heart has made. For I believe you didn't send for me
to tell me you hate me.
Jenny:
You won't know my true feelings if you don't clear up the uncertainty
I am in at once.
Bendish:
Come, my little heart, my queen, let's not amuse ourselves with
twaddle. Look at these stooping airs, this figure. When we know each
other a little better I will ogle you.
Laura: (aside)
This cannot be Cadwell!
Arabella: (aside, half voice)
No, surely not.
Bendish:
Who just said I am not Cadwell. You lied.
Olivia: (low to Worthy)
Brother, it isn't him.
Worthy: (low)
I don't know what to make of it.
Selina (low)
It's not him.
Jenny: (to Laura in a half voice)
Madam, it's Bendish.
Bendish:
What do you mean, Bendish. Who's that then, my little friend?
Jenny: (low to Laura)
It's him, madam.
Worthy: (half voice)
A stick.
Bendish:
What do you mean a stick? Madam, I will dishonor you.
(Jenny looks for and finds a stick)
Worthy:
Quickly!
(Jenny beats Bendish with the stick)
Bendish: (trying to get off his blindfold)
Assault! Again? Oh, murder. They're trying to assassinate me.
Worthy:
What rogue! Are you playing with us?
Laura:
Well, wasn't I right? Come Worthy, stop deluding yourself. Cadwell
loves me and to mock you better he sends his valet. (to Arabella and
Selina) What do you say ladies?
Arabella:
I say it isn't astonishing, for he's never been caught in his life.
Laura: (to Selina)
And you, madam?
Selina:
That he will repent.
Olivia: (to Laura)
For myself, I say nothing.
Jenny:
And I, I always said he was a clever cheat.
Worthy:
There's something in this that I don't understand, but I will soon
find out. (To Bendish) Will you talk?
Bendish: (hesitating)
Sir?
Worthy:
Come on, quickly.
Bendish: (still hesitating)
Sir?
Worthy: (putting his hand on his sword and menacing him)
I will kill you.
Bendish: (throwing himself on his knees)
Spare a lucky man.
Worthy:
Come on, now, admit it. What do you say about all this?
Bendish: (hesitating and getting up)
Whatever you wish, sir.
Worthy:
Well?
Bendish:
The curiosity to be a lucky man and the ease that I found in playing
the role of one, made me try,--as you see.
Worthy:
Ah, rogue! And how did you do it?
Bendish:
I told my master the rendez-vous was changed to ten p.m. and I came at
nine in his place.
Worthy:
Then it still isn't ruined. It's not quite ten o'clock. Slice, go back
to the Park. You've taken the valet for the master. You will find
Cadwell-- Bring him as you did this one.
Slice:
If I find him, I will be back here in no time.
(Exit Slice)
Worthy:
Madam, Cadwell will not be so faithful as you imagine.
Laura: (to Bendish)
Bendish, do you think he will come?
Bendish:
Madam, I don't know anything about it. But if in my life, I get
lucky--
Jenny: (interrupting him)
Things don't always succeed.
Bendish:
Experience makes me doubt a bit. But at least I know the rap that
rapped me so distinctly. If it's this little rapper, she's devilishly
strong.
Jenny:
It was me. I ought to have done it to you a long time ago.
Bendish:
I thank you for your favors.
Arabella: (to Laura)
If Cadwell's going to come we won't be long in knowing. The Park isn't
far from here.
Selina:
I will be very irritated not to see the end of this adventure,
although I preferred him to a person who wasn't very disagreeable.
Laura: (to Jenny)
Jenny, see if someone isn't coming down there.
Bendish:
I will go to hurry him if you wish, madam.
Worthy: (to Laura)
Madam, don't let him leave, if you please.
Laura: (to Jenny)
Someone's coming now.
(Jenny goes to the door)
Bendish: (aside)
I see that he won't be here too soon.
Jenny: (returning)
Madam, (to Laura) our man sent me to tell you he will be here in a
moment. He's taking several detours so he cannot judge the distance.
Laura:
Come on, it's over. I will be absolutely cured, and I think I will
never speak to him again in my life.
Selina:
Although you'd like a confession from me, know that I have more
fortitude than you and that I have forgotten him more easily than I
came to love him.
Arabella:
As for me, I haven't got such a strong soul.
Selina: (to Olivia)
But you, madam, he loves you.
Olivia:
Like the others.
Bendish:
I assure you that you are the only woman in the world of whom I never
heard him say a bad thing.
Laura:
And of me, Bendish?
Bendish:
Oh, for you, he loves you, madam.
Laura:
Who can doubt it after this. I am going to speak to him myself. I
won't bother to change my voice.
Worthy:
Madam.
Laura: (interrupting him)
I beg you, let me do it. I intend to speak to him. (to Olivia,
Arabella, and Selina making them sit in a corner) Ladies, be seated.
(to Worthy, also placing him to the side) Worthy, you sit back, too.
Worthy:
Tell Bendish to be silent.
Bendish:
I don't intend to say a word. (to Laura) Do you treat all lucky men
the way I was treated?
Laura:
It is only a traitor who deserves it, a liar like your master.
Bendish:
I will have my revenge.
Jenny: (low to Laura, leading in Cadwell)
Madam, here he is.
Laura:
Everybody retire.
(All go to their places. Jenny and Bendish beside each other. Enter
Cadwell blindfolded.)
Laura: (to Cadwell in a disguised voice)
Here's an adventure that resembles those in a novel. Sir, I believe
you won't find the precautions I have taken bad. Your reputation is
bad enough as regards women so that I cannot see you otherwise.
Nature, which perhaps has not protected me very well, engages me to
know the state of your heart before disclosing mine. Some attentions
paid to me persuade me that I am pretty, that I have wit, that I am
always done justice. I've never found it in me to make a man
unfaithful to his beloved. Even when my vanity flatters me to the
point of making me believe I could, the goodness of my heart dissuades
me from doing it. My pleasures do not augment from the shame of
others. Nor does a false one cease to be false. Speak then sincerely,
if you can. Are you free?
Cadwell:
You will judge my sincerity by the confession you are about to hear. I
don't have a free heart, madam. I don't wish to deceive you: I'm in
love and I have been for a long time. You see at least that my
behaviour gives the lie to the reputation ascribed to me.
Worthy: (low to Olivia)
He recognizes her.
Olivia:
Shut up.
Laura:
You love, Cadwell? For a long time you say?
Cadwell:
Yes, I love, madam. And with a love that will end only with my life.
Laura:
But this so tender love--isn't it offended by the steps you are
taking?
Cadwell:
I will have a hard time telling you what made me come here.
Laura:
Really, I don't know how to stop myself from praising you. If I cannot
win you at least I have the pleasure of knowing you are not such as
you have been painted. But Cadwell, can I obtain the bounty from you
at the price of my tenderness?
Cadwell:
There's nothing I wouldn't do for you so long as it doesn't injure my
passion.
Worthy: (low to Selina)
He recognizes her, I tell you.
Selina: (low)
Eh, shut up.
Laura: (to Cadwell)
I wouldn't want you to do such an extraordinary thing. I don't want to
find you even indiscreet. But Cadwell, if I divine your mistress, I
want you to admit it to me. Is it Arabella?
Cadwell:
Ah, madam, of whom are you talking to me?
Laura:
What makes you recoil so strongly? Has she no merit?
Cadwell:
Ah, madam, let's not discuss Arabella in detail. We will find so
little of Nature, and so many things borrowed. Please, madam, let's
not talk of it any more. There are some people that should never be
spoken of.
Arabella: (low to Selina and almost rising)
I don't know how I can hold back.
Selina:
Wait till the end.
Laura: (to Cadwell)
There's a rumor all over the place that you love Selina.
Cadwell:
She's a 'adwoman.
Bendish: (to Worthy)
That pays her off.
Laura:
Oh, I have divined it. It's Olivia who lives with Laura.
Cadwell:
Oh, madam do you know her? Distrust her. She's got the most wicked
disposition.
Laura:
Name her yourself then?
Cadwell:
Ah, madam, if you knew here as I do, you would easily pardon my
insensibility to you.
Laura:
Is she witty?
Cadwell:
Yes, madam, she is that. But no part of heir wit is not fully grown.
It seems that hers only serves to discover it in others.
Laura:
Why that's a pretty character indeed. She's beautiful without a doubt.
Cadwell:
Ah, don't engage me to paint her portrait. I couldn't do it without
offending you. And you, never having seen her, I cannot tell you how I
find her the most adorable woman in the world.
Laura: (sighing)
She ought to be content to appear so to your eyes.
Cadwell: (trying to take off his blindfold)
Let's not pretend further and permit me the joy of seeing the only
person with whom I wish to live.
Laura: (stopping him)
Stop!
Cadwell:
Eh, madam, what good are all these delays. I know you, I know who you
are.
Laura:
Wait. To whom do you think you are speaking?
Cadwell:
To you, madam.
Laura:
I am not Laura.
Cadwell:
And it isn't to her that I address my vows. And I must tell you only
the hope that it could be Lady Julia made me come here. If it isn't to
her that I speak, I shall return without seeing you.
Laura:
You don't love Laura any more?
Cadwell:
No, madam, I never loved Laura.
Laura:
You don't love me, liar! You dare to say that to my face! Eh! Why did
you deceive me then? (tearing off his blindfold)
Bendish:
This isn't funny unless accompanied by blows from a stick. That would
be much more pleasant to me.
Arabella:
Goodbye, Mr. Cadwell. I thank you for the kind sentiments you have for
me.
Olivia: (to Cadwell)
As for me, I am satisfied.
Selina:
Adieu, Cadwell.
Jenny: (to Bendish)
Adieu, Mr. Bendish.
Laura: (to Worthy)
Mr. Worthy, will you take my hand?
Worthy:
Will I indeed!
Laura:
I give it to you. (to Cadwell) Adieu, false one. Don't ever see me
again.
(Exit Laura, Worthy, Olivia, Arabella, Selina, Slice, and Jenny to
Laura's apartment.
Bendish:
Come, sir! Hadn't we better be on our way. We will soon be evicted.
Above all, let's change our names and the part of town we live in. We
are denounced hereabouts like counterfeit money.
Cadwell: (aside, overwhelmed with astonishment and confusion)
Just Heavens!
Bendish:
It this would only teach him.
CURTAIN