A FINE SPECTACLE.
We brought the Rose of Devon to her moorings on the south side of the
river, about two miles short of Barnstaple, where a little bend and
creek is, and a place for barges, and "Deadman's Pill" was the name of
it. What could a dead man want with a pill, was the very first thing I
asked them; but they said that was no concern of theirs; there were
pills up and down the river for miles, as well as a town called
Pill-town. The cleverest man that I came across said that it must be by
reason of piles driven in where the corners were to prevent the washing,
and he showed me some piles, or their stumps, to prove it, and defied
all further argument. For the time I was beaten, until of a sudden, and
too late to let him know, I saw like a stupid that it must be no other
than our own word "Pwll," which differs much from an English "pool,"
because it may be either dry or wet, so long as it lies in a hollow. And
with that I fell a-thinking of poor Bardie and Pwll Tavan. To be quit of
remorse, and to see the world, I accepted old Ikey's invitation to
Barnstaple fair for the very next day. We could not begin to discharge
our limestone, as even that obstinate Fuzzy confessed, upon a sacred day
like that. Fuzzy himself had a mind for going, as we half suspected,
although he held his tongue about it; and my under-mate told me to let
him alone, and see what would come of it.
The town is a pleasant and pretty one, and has always been famous for
thinking itself more noble than any other; also the fair was a fine
thing to see, full of people, and full of noise, and most outrageous
dialect; everybody in fine broad humour, and no fighting worth even
looking at. This disappointed me; for in Wales we consider the off-day
market a poor one, unless at least some of the women pull caps. I tried,
however, not to miss it, having seen in foreign countries people meeting
peaceably. Of this I could have had no intention to complain to poor
Ikey Hutchings. However, he took it as if I had, and offered to find me
a man from Bratton, or himself, to have a square with me, and stake
half-a-crown upon it. He must have found early cause for repentance, if
I had taken him at his word; but every one would have cried shame upon
me against such a poor little fellow. And so we pushed on, and the
people pushed us.
After a little more of this, and Ikey bragging all the time, though I
saw nothing very wonderful, we turned the corner of a narrow street, and
opened into a broader one. Here there seemed to be no bullocks, such as
had made us keep springs on our cables, but a very amazing lot of
horses, trotting about, and parading, and rushing, most of them with
their tails uphoisted, as if by discharging tackle. Among them stood
men, making much of their virtues, and sinking their faults (if they had
any), and cracking a whip every now and then, with a style of applause
toward them.
Now I have a natural love of the horse, though I never served long on
board of one; and I regularly feel, at sight of them, a desire to mount
the rigging. Many a time I have reasoned to my own conviction and my
neighbours', that a man who can stand on the mizzen-top-gallant yard in
a heavy gale of wind, must find it a ridiculously easy thing to hold on
by a horse with the tackle to help him, and very likely a dead calm all
round. Nevertheless, somehow or other, the result seems always
otherwise.
I had just hailed a man with a colt to show off, and commodore's
pendants all over his tail, and was keeping clear of his counter to
catch the rise of the wave for boarding him, when a hush came over all
hands as if the street had been raked with chain-shot. And on both sides
of the street all people fell back and backed their horses, so that all
the roadway stood as clear as if the fair had turned into a Sunday
morning.
Up the centre, and heeding the people no more than they would two rows
of trees, came two grave gentlemen, daintily walking arm in arm, and
dressed in black. They had broad-flapped hats, long coats of broadcloth,
black silk tunics, and buckled breeches, and black polished boots
reaching up to the buckles.
Meanwhile all the people stood huddled together upon the pitched stones
on either side, touching their hats, and scarce whispering, and even the
showing off of the horses went into the side-streets.
After all the bowing and legging that I had beheld in the Royal Navy,
the double file, the noble salutes, the manning of the sides and yards,
the drums, the oars all upon the catch, and all the other glorious
things that fit us to thrash the Frenchmen so, there was nothing else
left for me to suppose but that here were two mighty admirals, gone into
mourning very likely for the loss of the Royal George, or come on the
sly perhaps to enjoy the rollicking of the fair, and sinking the uniform
for variety. How could I tell, and least of all would I think of
interfering with the pleasure of my betters; therefore I stopped in my
throat the cheer (which naturally seemed to rise the moment I took my
hat off), for fear of letting the common people know that I understood
their Honours. But after looking again so long as one might without
being inquisitive, I saw that neither of these great men could walk the
deck in a rolling sea.
I had been so bold in the thick of the horses, that Ikey had found it
too much for him always to keep close to me; but now, as the nearest
horse must have drifted the length of two jolly-boats away, this little
sailor came up and spoke.
"Can 'e show the laikes of they two, in Taffy-land, old Taffy now?"
"Plenty, I should hope," said I (though proud in the end to say "not
one"); "but what a fuss you make! Who are they?"
"As if thee didn't know!" cried Ikey, staring with indignation at me.
"How should I know when I never clapped eyes on either of them till this
moment?"
"Thou hast crossed the water for something then, Davy. Them be the two
Passons!"
"Two Passons!" I could not say it exactly as he sounded it. "I never
heard of two Passons."
"'A wants to draive me mad, 'a dooth," said Ikey, in self-commune: "Did
'e never hear tell of Passon Chowne, and Passon Jack, man alive now?"
It was hopeless to try any more with him, for I could not ding into his
stupid head the possibility of such ignorance. He could only believe
that I feigned it for the purpose of driving him out of his senses, or
making little of his native land. So I felt that the best thing I could
do was to look at those two great gentlemen accurately and impartially,
and thus form my own opinion. Hence there was prospect of further
pleasure, in coming to know more about them.
Verily they were goodly men, so far as the outer frame goes; the one for
size, and strength, and stature--and the other for face, form, and
quickness. I felt as surely as men do feel, who have dealed much among
other men, that I was gazing upon two faces not of the common order. And
they walked as if they knew themselves to be ever so far from the
average. Not so much with pride, or conceit, or any sort of arrogance,
but with a manner of going distinct from the going of fellow-creatures.
Whether this may have been so, because they were both going straight to
the devil, is a question that never crossed my mind, until I knew more
about them. For our parsons in Wales, take them all in all, can hardly
be called gentlemen; except, of course, our own, who was Colonel
Lougher's brother, also the one at Merthyr Mawr, and St Brides, and one
or two other places where they were customers of mine; but most of the
rest were small farmers' sons, or shopkeepers' boys, and so on. These
may do very well for a parish, or even a congregation that never sees a
gentleman (except when they are summoned--and not always then); however,
this sort will not do for a man who has served, ay, and been in battle,
under two baronets and an earl.
Therefore I looked with some misgiving at these two great parsons; but
it did not take mo long to perceive that each of them was of good birth
at least, whatever his manners afterwards,--men who must feel themselves
out of their rank when buttoned into a pulpit for reasoning with
Devonshire plough-tail Bobs, if indeed they ever did so; and as for
their flocks, they kept dogs enough at any rate to look after them. For
they both kept hounds; and both served their Churches in true hunting
fashion--that is to say, with a steeplechase, taking true country at
full gallop over hedges and ditches, and stabling the horse in the
vestry. All this I did not know as yet, or I must have thought even
more than I did concerning those two gentlemen. The taller of the two
was as fair and ruddy, and as free of countenance as a June rose in the
sunshine; a man of commanding build and figure, but with no other
command about him, and least of all, that of his own self. The other it
was that took my gaze, and held it, having caught mine eyes, until I
forgot myself, and dropped them under some superior strength. For the
time, I knew not how I felt, or what it was that vanquished me; only
that my spirit owned this man's to be its master. Whether from excess of
goodness, or from depth of desperate evil, at the time I knew not.
It was the most wondrous unfathomable face that ever fellow-man fixed
gaze upon; lost to mankindliness, lost to mercy, lost to all memory of
God. As handsome a face as need be seen, with a very strong forehead and
coal-black eyes, a straight white nose, and a sharp-cut mouth, and the
chin like a marble sculpture. Disdain was the first thing it gave one to
think of; and after that, cold relentless humour; and after that,
anything dark and bad.
Meanwhile this was a very handsome man, as women reckon beauty; and his
age not over forty, perhaps; also of good average stature, active and
elegant form, and so on. Neither years nor cubits make much odds to a
man of that sort; and the ladies pronounce him perfect.
When these two were gone by, I was able to gaze again at the taller one.
Truly a goodly man he was, though spared from being a good one. He
seemed to stand over me, like Sir Philip; although I was measured for
six feet and one inch, before I got into rheumatic ways. And as for size
and compass, my parents never could give me food to fetch out my girth,
as this parson's was. He looked a good yard and a half round the chest,
and his arms were like oak-saplings. However, he proved to be a man void
of some pride and some evil desires, unless anybody bore hard on him;
and as for reading the collects, or lessons, or even the burial service,
I was told that no man in the British realm was fit to say "Amen" to
him. This had something to do with the size of his chest, and perhaps
might have helped to increase it. His sermons also were done in a style
that women would come many miles to enjoy; beginning very soft and
sweet, so as to melt the milder ones; and then of a sudden roaring
greatly with all the contents of enormous lungs, so as to ring all round
the sides of the strongest weaker vessels. And as for the men, what
could they think, when the preacher could drub any six of them?
This was "Parson Jack," if you please, his surname being "Rambone," as I
need not say, unless I write for unborn generations. His business in
Boutport Street that day was to see if any man would challenge him. He
had held the belt seven years, they said, for wrestling, as well as for
bruising; the condition whereof was to walk the street both at
Barnstaple fair and at Bodmin revels, and watch whether any man laid
foot across him.
This he did purely as a layman might. But the boxing and bruising were
part of his office, so that he hung up his cassock always for a
challenge to make rent in it. There had been some talk of a Cornishman
interfering about the wrestling; and bad people hoped that he might so
attempt, and never know the way home again; but as for the fighting, the
cassock might hang till the beard of Parson Jack was grey, before any
one made a hole in it. Also the Cornish wrestler found, after looking at
Parson Jack, that the wisest plan before him was to challenge the other
Cornishmen, and leave the belt in Devonshire.
All this I found out at a little gathering which was held round the
corner, in Bear Street, to reflect upon the business done at the fair,
and compare opinions. And although I had never beheld till then any of
our good company, neither expected to see them again, there were no two
opinions about my being the most agreeable man in the room. I showed
them how to make punch to begin with, as had been done by his Royal
Highness, with me to declare proportions; and as many of the farmers had
turned some money, they bade me think twice about no ingredient that
would figure on the bill, even half-a-crown.
By right of superior knowledge, and also as principal guest of the
evening, I became voted the chairman, upon the clear understanding that
I would do them the honour of paying nothing; and therein I found not a
man that would think of evading his duty towards the chair. I entreated
them all to be frank, and regard me as if I were born in Barnstaple,
which they might look upon as being done otherwise, as the mere turn of
a shaving; for my father had been there twice, and my mother more than
once thought of trying it. Everybody saw the force of this; and after a
very fine supper we grew as genial as could be. And leading them all
with a delicate knowledge of the ins and outs of these natives (many of
which I had learned at the fair), and especially by encouraging their
bent for contradiction, I heard a good deal of the leading people in the
town or out of it. I listened, of course, to a very great deal, which
might be of use to me or might not; but my object was, when I could
gather in their many-elbowed stories, to be thoroughly up to the mark on
three points.
First, about Fuzzy, and most important. Who was he? What was he? Where
did he live? Had he got a wife? And if so, why? And if not, more
especially, why again? Also, how much money had he, and what in the
world did he do with it; and could he have, under the rose, any reason
for keeping our women so distant? Particularly, I had orders to know
whether he was considered handsome by the Devonshire women. For our
women could not make up their minds, and feared to give way to the high
opinion engendered by his contempt of them. Only they liked his general
hairiness, if it could be warranted not to come off.
Upon this point I learned nothing at all. No man even knew Bethel Jose,
or, at any rate, none would own to it, perhaps because Ikey was there to
hearken; so I left that until I should get with the women. My next
matter was about Braunton Burrows, and the gentleman of high rank who
wandered up and down without telling us why. And I might hereupon have
won some knowledge, and was beginning to do so, when a square stout man
came in and said "Hush!" and I would gladly have thrown a jug at him.
Nevertheless, I did learn something which I mean to tell next to
directly.
But as concerned the third question before me (and to myself the most
itching of any), satisfaction, to at least half-measure, was by proper
skill and fortune brought within my reach almost. And this I must set
down at leisure, soberly thinking over it.