The child suffers the sharpest pains, the crudest poignancy that could
possibly be inflicted upon its body, through the stupid, frightening and
monstrous tales that are continually told to it to make it "good," to
make it "obey."
To think that a child cannot bear to enter the dark, cannot bear to be
alone, cannot bear to be separated from its loving and protecting
parents, and yet must suffer in a few moments from a fatal disease--the
agony of all this, in the face of death, is the crime of crimes, too
damnable and horrible for words.
I remember once seeing a little lost child. It cried for its mother. Hot
tears were streaming down its burning cheeks. Its face portrayed the
severest form of suffering that life is capable of experiencing. If
Nature ever made a frail article, it is our tender offspring, so
bewildered, so utterly helpless, so agonizingly delusioned, so
pitifully searching for some familiar face; something to make it
discover its lost self. Oh, what power ever made us so tender, so
incapable of self-help, as to have us undergo and feel such terrific
suffering! It is injustice enough when adults are made to suffer mental
and physical ills, without inflicting such a painful decree upon mere
infants.
At least an adult has some conception of his suffering. He can make
provision for some remedy. He can seek others to ask them to render
help. He knows, he feels, he understands the situation, and can adjust
himself as best he can to obtain some relief.
But not so with the child. Its mind is not capable of comprehending the
condition which makes its suffering so sharp. Its little brain is too
feeble, hardly strong enough to direct its awkward and bulky body, much
less to solve such an incredible predicament as being utterly destitute
of help, in a world fashioned upon such an unsatisfactory plan.
There is not, nor can there be, a sadder, more distressing sight, than
to see a little lost child overcome with fright.
If it were in my power to abolish any of Nature's cruel laws, I would
take from the little child its feeling of pain.
Let me ask, would man, were it in his power, send a helpless creature,
utterly unable to sustain itself, without power of thought,
understanding or expression, so dependent upon loving care, kindness,
help and comprehension, into a world that is a wilderness, a world
reeking with pestilence and populated with shrieking beasts and brutal
and savage people?
As a passing word regarding the child, let me say this:
Do not judge your child as an ordinary mechanical instrument, as if he
could be wound up to a certain degree and gradually, as if by clockwork,
tick away each moment of the day. The child is a combustible force, and,
although there are certain rules by which you may obtain the greatest
degree of improvement, you cannot rigidly adhere to them. There are
numberless instances when the propensity or inclination of the child may
appear to you to be aggravating and annoying; nevertheless, you must not
let _your_ irritability interfere with the development of that trait
preëminent to the child's character.
Look upon your child, encourage your boy or girl, to be a pioneer and a
soldier in the march of progress. Instruct it with the knowledge of the
miserable conditions of our past history, and bring it forcibly to
understand that efforts only are repaid, and that we must work in order
to accomplish.
Prayers are only wasted words on the desert air. The greatest mental
crime ever committed is that of teaching a child, "while still upon its
mother's knee," its duty and obedience to God. It would appear that for
the amount of suffering it must endure, and in the face of its
unconsulted coming, we should at least disregard God for his insolence,
and impress upon the child the peculiar conditions of life. We should
instruct it, that from time immemorial, Nature has been laboring through
the most awkward process of reproduction, and has finally brought the
child into existence, not to enjoy the benefits, or eat of the fruits of
the earth, but to bear a life of continual strife and suffering. Not of
God should we speak to our child, but of the importance of being
prepared to do all in its power to help others to escape the torture,
misery and hardships it must so painfully overcome. Is it any wonder
that we grow up to be serfs and slaves? Before we are able to know or
understand the very rudest fundamentals of life, our entire mental
machinery is corrupted by unshakable fears and dedicated to the vilest
and most sickening submission. Would that we were left alone, and free
to follow the thoughts of our own minds, regarding the great problems
of life. What a mighty, unhampered power we would possess to find the
proper course of action, and possibly the real solution to the mystery
of the _Tyranny of God_!
To love and to reverence our tormentor is repulsive and despicable, and
since we refuse to allow man to tyrannize over man, what degradation it
is for the human race to cringe and bow down unconditionally to the
imagination in the great realm of uncertainty!
Do not hurt your child. Do not strike it. Do not cause it any
unnecessary pain. Before it is able to walk, before it is able to talk,
before it is old enough to tell of its pain and suffering, Nature makes
it endure enough.
Remember, the only language of the babe is the cry of pain.
Imagine yourself under the lash of suffering, utterly speechless and
incapable of conveying your wants and feelings to an absolutely strange
surrounding, and you will have a slight picture of the growing child in
your household. Did you ever stop to consider that the child, when born,
does not know that you are its parent? It does not know that you are its
father, or that you are its mother. It does not know what prompted its
birth, or why it must live--and above all, what it has done to be sent
to such a miserable prison place as the planet upon which we live. We
must demonstrate all this as well as we can to the child.
This much we can be sure of: kindness, tenderness and love should
forever be our guide in our dealings and contact with children.
The child is brought into this world from the insuppressible passion of
two people, and surely without its consent, and it is absolute tyranny
and barbarity to torment its mind or to punish its body, regardless of
the result its action may have upon us.
To the little children that have suffered the horrible punishment so
generally followed in that cruel and false book--the Bible--my heart
goes out in pity, since words fail me to describe those savage
characters that visit inhuman, tormenting and torturous treatment upon
their unwelcome offspring.
If we were forced to perform the thousand tyrannies that are directed
against the child during the day by cruel and thoughtless parents, the
lunatic asylum would soon be our place of refuge. Such trivial things as
a spot on the shoe, a speck of dirt upon the clothes, a mere tip of the
hat, a slight turn of the scarf often give rise to such violent
reprimand, and very often brutal punishment, that the savageness of
barbarians is mild compared to such displays of temper.
My heart again goes out to you, little children, when and wherever you
are, that must bear the brunt of brutal actions from stupid and
thoughtless parents and guardians. These people seem to classify
children in the matter of discipline as grown ups, thinking (or,
rather, not thinking) that children's undeveloped minds should be as
strong as theirs, when they themselves are unable to practice the
self-denial that they expect from mere infants.
How often does a child receive a slap in the face from a parent for the
asking of only a simple question, when the parent is not in the "humor"
to "bother" with him?
What a painful and terrifying beating does a child often get for
disobeying some arbitrary command uttered by the one over him. To the
child, "Don't do this," "Don't go there," "Stand up straight," and "Say
this" are commands that carry with them court martial and its severe and
unrelenting punishment.
Remember this: The child will respond to kindness and love more readily
and directly than to force and unwarranted discipline. It is purely a
question of whether your feelings are actuated by these impulses.
If you have become mentally strong enough to restrain your impulses to
strike your child, do not substitute other means to "punish" him.
Changing the method of brutally inflicting physical pain upon your child
to some other means, though less repulsive, is still obnoxious and
harmful.
If you are unable to convince your child, by persuasion, example or
otherwise, that you are right and that the child should follow your
instruction, then by all means, let it become the victor in the contest.
Fear--fear of pain, fear in every form--controls our lives, and shapes
the courses of our puny destinies.