"SOME one has blundered!" Who? The Messrs. GATTI, in sending to
Messrs. BUCHANAN and SIMS ("B. & S.") for an Adelphi melodrama? Surely
not! These two might have been trusted to turn out the right article.
So the GATTIS leave the Court without a stain on their managerial
character. Therefore, 'tis the brother-authors, "_hoi Adelphoi_,"
who have blundered. Undoubtedly. An Adelphi audience is not to be
satisfied with a one-scene piece, when that scene is without any
incident in it worth a melodramatic father's cuss. A fancy-dress ball
at Covent Garden, however well put on the stage,--and, after all, it
has not beaten the record of the Masked Ball at the Opera House
in Paris, as given in Mr. IRVING'S revival of _The Corsican
Brothers_,--will not carry a piece of far stronger calibre than _The
Black Domino_, and it won't carry this. Neither will a charming "set,"
representing the terrace of the "Star and Garter," at Richmond, carry
a piece to a successful finale, if the audience has lost all interest
in the characters, and does not very much care what becomes of any one
of them, male or female. To the play-goer it is not attractive; he has
seen it all before. "He knows that man and that woman,--they come from
Sheffield;" _i.e._, the persons and the incidents are taken out of a
lot of dramas which dwell in his memory, from BOUCICAULT'S _Formosa_
at Drury Lane, up to OSCAR'S _Lady Windermere's Fan_ at the St.
James's. Of course, my imaginary play-goer is the Bill of the play,
who has "matured," and is not a junior member of the Play-goer's
Club. Then, in the old blind German, there is a touch of TOM TAYLOR'S
_Helping Hands_, and, as for all the rest of the characters, well,
they can be found in the common stock-pot of the melodramatic authors
of the last half-century, for, like SHAKSPEARE himself, these wicked
lawyers and gamblers--the aiders and a-betters--are "not for an age"
(would they were, and that age passed!) "but for all time!"
[Illustration: _B-ch-n-n._ "The prize from the lucky-bag"----
_S-ms._ "A blank?"]
Nothing saves the piece from being absolutely dull, except the
admirable acting, and, I may add, the scenery. It is impossible to
count upon renewing such effects as those in _Formosa, The Flying
Scud,_ and in the _Prodigal Daughter_ at Drury Lane, wherein the wrong
horse was poisoned (in a really dramatic scene), and LEONARD BOYNE,
riding the winner, cleared the brook, thus causing part-author
DRURIOLANUS to clear--any amount of money. There are no two exciting
scenes like these in this Adelphi drama. Its comic relief is "poor
relief," and would go for nothing at all, were it not in the hands
of Mr. DALE, who played and sang so well in _Miss Decima_ at the
Criterion, and of the vivacious Miss CLARA JECKS.
Mr. W. DENNIS, as the _Earl of Arlington_, is own brother to the
old Peer in _The Bauble Shop_. Perhaps this is a tribute to the
representative of the aristocracy at the Criterion, or it indicates
with great subtlety that, like Members of Parliament, "Peers are,
after all, human--very human," and that one old Peer is uncommonly
like another old Peer. Miss EVELYN MILLARD, as the soprano heroine,
and Mrs. PATRICK CAMPBELL as the base heroine, look handsome, and act
excellently. They take the audience with them as far as the audience
will go. As good as they possibly can be in such conventional
puppet-parts are Messrs. GLENNY and ABINGDON, the first as the
well-intentioned but weak-willed _Lord Dashwood_, and the second as
that old-fashioned scoundrel, _Captain Greville_. Mr. ARTHUR WILLIAMS
rather suggests Mr. BLAKELEY as the oily, scoundrelly lawyer, _Joshua
Honybun_; and Mr. LE HAY gives variety to the entertainment (which is
his special line) in the entirely new and original character part
of _an Irish Major_, with nothing particularly humorous to say, and
nothing at all, humorous, or otherwise, to do.
[Illustration: GOOD OLD MELODRAMA MODERNISED.
_Lord Glenny Dashwood_ (_to Captain Abingdon Greville._) "Liar and
slave!"
[_Strikes him. They fight with fists._]
Something new in Melodrama is wanted, and Melodrama "all of the modern
time" is played out, unless a genius can hit on a new sensation.
The Adelphi piece, however, has its advantages, and among these its
chiefest is, that it necessitates the taking of light refreshment
immediately afterwards. Fortunately, the Adelphi is close to our old
friend RULE'S in Maiden Lane, and for this hospitable shelter
our party made in haste; and, before the arrival of the crowd
of supper-numeraries, gained a table, on which were soon placed
appetising and drinkatising oysters, followed by the grateful stout.
"Pretty to see," as PEPYS hath it, at the very next table to us, the
good hero of the drama welcoming the double-dyed villain, chiding
him for being a few minutes late, and then drowning all past dramatic
animosities in the flowing bowl. "See how these players love one
another!" So have I seen politicians, mortal enemies in the House,
hob-nobbing together at the dinner-table of some hospitable Impartial.
"And thus it is," said I to myself, said I, "that 'all the world's a
stage, and men and women' like to have supper after the play and enjoy
themselves generally." So philosophising, we, my companion and I,
lighted the pipe of peace--I should say a cigar a-piece--and returned
home satisfied with our excellent supper. _Vive_ BAYLISS! BRITANNIA
rules the waves, and this is the last month for oysters till the
arrival of another month with an "r" in it; but, _en attendant_, there
will appear some very small, very sweet, and very digestible lobsters!
"_Le jeu ne vaut pas la chandelle?_" But an indifferent play is well
worth a first-rate supper, which may be a shell-fish view, but at all
events, if (like the jest) it be "a poor thing," yet 'tis mine own
(for the time being), and thereto I sign my hand.